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@cassava

Joined 11 May 2021 · 2 posts

Bitter sweet.

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@cassava

A day to discover... There are days when we just discover something new. Or that we thought we knew something but not really. I was fooled a while ago. They fooled me. Or I was just really ignorant. I think I need to study or research harder. On the other hand, I thought I knew something very well but it turns out I needed to have some review. Though it's normal to be needing review every now and then. Are there animals with more than one heart? We went to our relatives this morning. It was customary for us in our culture that when the beam of the foundation of the house is slabbed, we will butcher a live animal and eat during lunch. We were waiting for our lunch. First served were 'pulutan' so that we won't be very hungry by the time lunch is served. I am fond of pulutan. So my sisters-in-law were saying, give us not the fifth heart of the pig. "What? Fifth heart?" "Yes! Didn't you know that the pigs have 5 hearts!" I was quizzing them but then they look very serious. "Really?" I put on a blank face although it was very obvious that they will burst out laughing anytime. Truth or not I still searched for my phone and looked it up. My in-laws persisted. "Why don't you believe us?" "You know, with your reputation, I wouldn't really believe you. Even if this were a trivial matter." They began sniggering but I still continued my game. Of course, I found the truth out. Then they defended themselves. "Ah, we just had an excess one. But really, the pig's heart has four chambers." At least I did not believe immediately. But seriously, I found out that there are creatures with more than one heart. Example is the octopus who has more than one heart. Well, I was not offended by their joke. I just defended myself that since I was really not knowledgeable about such a thing of having more than one heart, so it would be reasonable to take advantage of the internet. It helped that I was able to discover something new. Conventions and notations should be studied well. By the time we finished lunch, it was already afternoon. My mobile phone that went dead after my child played with it has been charging for few hours. Therefore I could already remove it from the plug. Upon opening the phone I received a message from the office where I'm working that I should open my email. To cut the story short, we came home then I checked my email. I replied and complied to their request from the office. At least I had a reason to escape from the gathering a while ago so I'm back to my desk or work area. Now I resumed what I was doing the previous day. I was finishing the answer key for the last module for midterms of Basic Calculus. Our topic is 'Continuity of Functions'. Though the concept is simple, I still have problems with conventions and notations. I discovered that I still have not studied well this part of the subject. There really is no problem with my understanding but I was left questioning my knowledge all the same. I reflected then realized that understandably, we have to be very definitive with our lesson so that we will not mistake one thing for another. Oh yes, we could do just fine and even excitedly with determining derivatives and integrals but when it came to the critical part, we always had doubts with our knowledge. So no doubt that is indeed a critical part. This is then a new call for me to really study my field of specialization and that I shouldn't just take things lightly. I researched on few things. I took down notes and glad that I was able to realize my mistake. I then discussed something with my department head and we agreed to do better from now on. This is also the reason why it is good for a teacher to always prepare lessons beforehand. Research, read a lot of things on the topic at hand and provide suggestions and inspirations to the students.

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@cassava

When the kids are away, mama will play. When the kids are away, mama will write. I wrote **play** in the title to make it rhyme with **away**. *This is about how I manage to write articles even though I am sitting my kids at home.* Intro When the kids go outside to play, I begin typing. I write. I reflect. I analyze and synthesize. The downside to sitting for long periods is achy legs and back. I enjoy writing very much that if only my circumstances would allow then I will just write for the rest of my days. But no, not just yet. I have to have my full time job. My children whine from time to time through out the day. I have a 10-year old, 5-year old, and almost 2-year old kids. My first baby sits the youngest. But he demands his freedom so I let him go to play with other kids. My second is the hardest to deal with--either he plays with my cellphone or buys whatchamacallits at the store if he is not outside playing with the other kids. My last and my only daughter is the cutest and dearest of all. After all she is the only girl. She is more considerate than the two. Even if she is still very young, I could feel how she will be in the near future. Going back, I have my table set up at the messy wide room of our house. There is no divider between the living room and kitchen and dining area. It is pretty easy for me to prepare coffee and the plugs are many around my workplace in the house. It is very convenient. To add to that, we have a store near us where we could readily buy groceries. So I could write more instead of using the time up to go to the grocery or market. But since I also needed to tighten my budget so I sacrifice time to go and get them at cheaper prices. Challenge The challenge for me is the interruption of the flow of my ideas. I send the kids to play. They come back. D1 (my first) will complain that her sister is crying and he can't do anything about it. So I have to rescue him from his sister. D2 as I have said is very hard to deal with when you are busy. You have to think of excellent ideas to keep him off gadget and so he will refrain from always buying at the store. Everytime he is done with the phone, he wants to buy. So I sacrifice some of my BCH earnings to buy him toys so that his screen time will be lessened and so that he will be entertained. D2 and D3 both need assistance whenever they poo or pee. Most especially with D3 because she still has her nappy on. When the nappy is full or soiled, I have to be the one to attend to her. After the interruption, sometimes I go off track with my original plan. Most of the time I simply finish the article so I am done with it. Otherwise the draft gets deleted. I try to refrain from deleting drafts but then it became habitual. Of course, I need to draft things for longer time so I have to fix my habit. Keeping my Cool Keeping my cool is the best way to deal with the problem. But most of the time, I shout and scold the kids especially if they don't seem to be listening to what I say. At the end of the day, I have no other feeling but love for them. There were instances where I question myself why I ever allowed myself to get married. But I could not question the past because the past had reasons in itself. Also I am a normal person who gets to feel what others feel. So I guess, there's no one to blame, even myself. Anyway, I bore three wonderful kids and being please with them instead of irritated is way better. I think that I am very much fortunate to have children. I think about the others, who, no matter what they did, were not blessed yet. But our pastor told us that even with barren women, nothing is impossible with prayer. My sister so wanted to have a child. I pray she will have one soon enough. But He has the perfect timing for things so only He knows. The Mess I sometimes wonder why I could go on writing even when house chores are not yet done. I tried telling my husband about getting a helper. He wondered as well why I needed one. But I know he knew I needed a house helper. I wanted to focus on my writing and academic concerns but I just can't put enough time for these due to house chores. But you know what? I still see my household lucky. Just lucky. Conclusion We come down with the thought that no matter what, we think best not to give in to negativities. Challenges must be dealt with accordingly with the best way possible. With my work done at home and with my passion in writing, I still try to do my best despite the interruptions that the rearing of the kids bring about. They are children. They need parents. Working parents or not. Also, there is no such thing as non-working parents. Whether you are in the field or in the house or in the office, being a parent is already a job in itself. The worry you feel for your kids, the stress you carry for them, and everything else that comes with parenting, they are no light matters. Hence, I finish this article off with a follow up on my title: When the kids are away, mama will play. This just means that I do whatever I can do when they are in their best moods for the day. And when needed, I have to attend to their needs and carry their requests on. I sometimes feel guilty for postponing things for them. But I want to forgive myself every time. And yes, right this moment I am playing (working).