My father and I do not have a good relationship because he left my Ma for another woman when I was only five. Then, he proceeded to forget the three of us, my brothers and I, so Mama brought us up by herself. There have been a few times in the past few years when I told myself to give him a second, third, and couple more chances to be the father he never was; moreso after Mama died of cancer. But all of those attempts at reconciliations ended up unfavorably. One instance stayed with me. It had only been a few months since Mama died when I decided to agree to stay with him and his partner. I thought everything was set. But a block from their house, he stopped the car and asked me to "pretend to be my niece because my adopted daughter doesn't know about you." How could I set foot in their house after that? I didn't, and he told the story to his relatives that I didn't want to stay with him. I even got an earful from my aunt. But I explained to her what happened and she got mad at him. Not me. It's been the same the past few years. He tells us that he wants to reconcile, but then he fails to follow through. He says one thing and does another. Recently, he messaged us three a letter of "apology" which only contained one line of something that sounded remotely as an apology, "I was not a good father." The rest of it talked about how hard hearted I was, how my uncles were the cause of their breakup, and more. I got mad when he talked negatively about my mother. It was then that I decided to cut him off. I prayed and told God that I do forgive him even though he has not asked for forgiveness. I owe it to myself and to my family to get rid of this grudge in my heart and move forward without the past weighing me down. It is all in God's hands now. 🙏 ***The moon was out the other night. This was taken just minutes before another downpour. 🌙