@bam94 17 December 2021 more from that month

A pirate walks into a pub. Another patron, having never met a pirate before, wants to know the stories behind the battle scars. He buys the pirate a pint, and strikes up a conversation. "How'd you get the peg leg?" "Shark took off me leg in the South Seas." "How about that hook?" "Lost the hand in a sword fight." "And the eye patch?" "Seagull pooped in me eye." "Are seagull droppings really that dangerous?" "No, but it were me first day with the hook."