@abrilata
feeling of not having feelings
*I lied* with all those enormous words ; That I can do it all alone, Without the help of anybody. That I can live without being loved ; That I don't care at all. I'm a little girl trapped in this aging vessel. I couldn't control my words. I curse, I yell I get angry. I feel the spinning world , And I am to fragile to handle things by myself. I want to feel the slow motion. I want to feel the butterflies in my stomach. I want to see the colors of the rain. I want to hear the music of someone's voice. *I want to be in love--- I want to be loved.* The body that I'm in started giving up. My mind stopped on thinking, But this little thing in my chest, I don't know yet . I think it has no plan to stop its own beating. It keeps me alive ; But my lungs can't handle air. *And I can't even remember when was the last time I breathe.* I am afraid to admit that I am wrong. When all I need is a comfort. I want to feel safe in an unsafe world. I want to feel like I am protected. I want to be loved. I know it takes time. But; I need it now. Before I forgot that I am wanting this for a very long time. Let me feel the feeling in a safe haven. Because I am tired of dealing with a feeling of not having feelings. quick 1am poetry . Just untangling words inside my head
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