Missing hue
**an outlet of feelings: if you could just feel me**
I haven't heard about you this day. Maybe you just don't remember me or missed me or maybe you don't even care for me at all. while me, there's not a single minute I don't think about you, that;s a fact. I don't want to end a day without knowing what's going on about you. I dont want a day to end without saying Hello to you or even just say Hi and if that day comes it will surely put me not in to sleep. It feels so empty without you :( damn.Do you still remember I told you "everyday, I promise to say I love you even when we are in bad or good terms" well. I did keep my promise, and i'm keeping it. though you're not hearing me saying those words because you don't wanna hear them anymore, I say it everyday to you secretly as I could and It is the worst feeling ever not to make you feel how much I felt for you. Before, we're like the perfect match, I tease you, you shout at me, you smile I laugh, you ache I worried, you cry I cry with you, you sing I sing with you, Im happy when you are happy, sad when your sad seems like we know each others very well BUT now everything seems so messed up I couldn't even joke around, you don't even believe any compliments from me.I'm the happiest person on earth to say that you are beautiful no one could ever imagine sadly you didn't believe any words I said and It hurts me more because you didn't believe that my love for you is true and purely comes from my heart.I'm asking sometimes in my deepest thought.. what stupidity did I do to make you turn away from me? Am I really that bad to make you fall out in love with me? am I boring you? Do I hurt you so much, is it heavier than the love youve felt? If so, then girl, can we retrace back the time and remember the feelings what we had, or can we just forget all these unpleasant moment and start a beautiful beginings. All I waant is your love, your laughter, your smile, your sweet kisses, your big hugs, the warmth of your touch, your sincere intimacy all of these I missed when I'm with you and I would do anything just to have you again, if you could just trust me. I will wait for the time for your love to comeback, my darling believe me I wont trade you for the world. I.. I just love you. and I missed you, please, hear me.
Quarter after two
I can't sleep and later tonight i'm sure it's going to be a replay scene
The problem is I missed you, badly
This is getting heavy each day.
I can't hardly move an inch
No words can define what I'm going through
Is this the weight of the gravity of what I've done to you
I felt the world collapse
I seen the stars collide
well it feels like God is coming home tonight
You are my anti gravity.
I float when I'm beside you
I shine when I'm around you
Every time I look around
and see every girls around
for some reason you're the first person
that comes inside my mind.
I see you in every night dream
I see you in every daydream
I even see you in my ice cream
I'm getting crazy over you,
my mind is sick and if you haven't notice it yet
you're the only medicine I have left.
There are times I don't talk at all
cause I'm thinking about to take you home
be with you, live with you all day long.
I love every names we made,
I love every sound we make
and hell yeah
I miss the face we imitate.
I know I lost you somewhere,
but now it's time to wear those dirty shoes
to find you and never lose you again.
We are all stars that have people's name.
One day, whether you're young or old, you will stumble upon someone who will start a fire in you that cannot die. However, the saddest, most awful truth you will ever come to find - is they are not always with whom we spend our lives.
Unconditional
Im here. I love you. I dont care if you need to stay up crying all night long
I will stay with you. If you need medication again, go ahead and take it--I will love you through that, as well. If you dont need the medication, I will love you, too.
There's nothing you can ever do to lose my love. I will protect you until you die,
and after your death I will STILL protect you. I am stronger than Depression
and I am braver than Loneliness and nothing will ever exhaust me.
Change
By making some changes in our lives. Pain, dysfunction, and disease are all very loud, uncomfortable messages that the body sends us that something needs to change. Like our body’s check engine sign. Movement, nutrition, sleep/rest, hydration, breathing, mindset/mental attitude are all of the things that make us who we are. The vast majority of the time when pain pops up out of nowhere without an obvious reason, like an accident, it’s because one (or several) of these critical areas need attention.
You were not just a star to me you are my whole damn sky.
My influential movies
Naalala ko pa nun bata pa ako yung tito ko maglalabas ng mga upuan tv at betamax. Dun magtitipon kami ng mga pinsan ko pra manood ng movie. Ibabahagi ko lang sa inyo ilan sa mga movies na tumatak sa buhay ko. At hanggang ngayon ay pinapanood ko pa ito. :)
**Child's Play**
Trip namin ng mga pinsan ko noong araw na di pa uso samin ang mag-brip, ay ang gayahin/i-reenact yung mga eksena kung saan pinagtatangkaan ni Chucky na isoul-swap si Andy, pero sa kalagitnaan ay biglang nauudlot. Saulado pa namin noon (with matching feelings/fervent passion) yung incantation na binibigkas ni Chucky sa ritual nya, palitan pa kami ng role magpipinsan as the possessor and the possessee, he-he-he, goodtimes.
**E.T.**
Nung mapanood ko to nung bata, ang gusto ko lang talaga eh makita si E.T., pero ang hindi ko napaghandaan ay ang emotional burden na ipapataw sakin dahil sa pagtatangkang yun... Nakaka-trauma, masyado pa kasi akong immature nung mga panahon na yun para intindihin ang ilang mga ideyang minumungkahi sa movie, gaya ng paglalagay ng mga tao sa mas di kapabor-pabor na posisyon sa perspektibo ng dualistic paradigm of good and evil, kung saan ay hostile ang role ng ilang humans kay alien protagonist, which dissents mula sa spectrum ng aking hilaw na kaisipan (me:human=good, ET=good / movie:human=bad, ET=good), at sa concept ng non-attachment na mahirap lunukin sa murang edad. Dahil may betamax tape copy kami nito, lagi ko tong pinapanood sa tuwing masusumpungan. No choice ako nun, dahil ang ibang mga tapes daw sa bahay ay yung "bawal sa bata". Ang siste eh, kahit ilang beses ko na napanood, mabigat padin sa feels pagtapos. Kaya tinuring ko noon na challenge ang panonood ng E.T. nang hindi maiiyak. Ginawa ko pa ngang parang game na premyo ang recognition sa sarili na "matapang" ako pag hindi napaiyak... paulit-ulit yun, pero kahit kelan hindi ako nanalo, at sa halip na ma-desensitize ang response sa pinapanood, e lalo lang na-ensure ng kalokohang ito ang aking masochistic tendencies.
**The Exorcist**
Pinakamalaking break sa hollywood acting career ni Beelzebub, aka, the lord of the flies... na kapareho ng title ng paborito kong libro na iniakda ni Golding. Halaw naman sa librong to ang isang classic pinoy movie na may pamagat na "Alkitrang Dugo", na pinagbibidahan ng walang iba, kundi ng primyadong actor na si Roderick Paulate, way back when he was still a kid, na mas nakilala ko naman sa kanyang mga natatanging pagganap sa mga pelikulang,"Inday, Inday sa Balitaw", at bilang orig na Petrang Kabayo sa "Petrang Kabayo at ang Pilyang Kuting", co-starring Aiza Seguera
**Star Wars**
Si George Lucas ay isang twisted na nilalang na may Morals na kagaya ng sa Pretzel. Ang pa-uso niyang StarWars franchise ay kalapastanganan sa dangal at tunay na adhikan ng Sith. Siya ang Mastermind sa walang pakundangang pagmaniubra ng mga salaysay upang mas paburan ng mga makapapanood ang gawi ng mga buktot na Jedi. Sa katunayan, ang tanging hangad ng Galactic Empire ay ang katiwasayan, seguridad at istabilidad ng buong Galaxy sa pamamaraang ibinatay (presumably) sa ideya ni Plato sa kanyang argumento ukol sa pamamahala na dapat pamunuan ng isang tatawaging Philosopher King. One way to describe how truly awesome the Empire is, is by imagining a great leader - Let's say Hitler for example, but a kind of Hitler who can use the Force Choke and without the stupid pornstache... tapos naka-lightsaber... and commanding the DeathStar... Now it's like the 3rd Reich on a galactic scale -- cool diba. Ang kaso, ang paggo-glorify sa anti-imperialist insurrection na pakana ng mga rebel alliance na sinawsawan naman ng mga palaboy na Jedi na mas trip ang kabaduyan ng egalitaryanismo, ang tampok sa pelikula. Kung tutuusin, dehado ang kampo ng mga rebel forces, umepal lang sa eksena ang mga laos at bitter na Jedi. Gamit ang kanyang Jedi mind-trick, nagawang ma-brain wash ni Obi-Wan Kenobi (ang former master ni Darth Vader at nag-taraidor din sa kanya) na kasangkapanin si Luke Skywalker -- ang nawawalang unico-hijo ni Darth Vader-- upang kalabanin ang kanyang sariling ama (dirty Jedi tactics). Sinulsulan pa ito ng isang matandang gremlins na baliktad kung mangusap. Sinubukang palayain ni Darth Vader si Luke mula sa malisyosong impluwensiya ng mga Jedi, ngunit hindi siya nagtagumpay. At dahil hindi niya magawang saktan ang kanyang anak -- ito ang inaasahan ng mga Jedi --ginamit ng mga Jedi ang pagkakataon upang mapabagsak sa kanilang mga kamay ang dalawang Sith Lords. Dahil sa parehong pagkakakubkob ng Master at apprentice, tuluyang naapula ang lagablab ng apoy ng Galactic Empire at dito din huling nagtapos ang layunin ng Order of Sith (see The Rule of Two). Binaliktad naman ni George Lucas ang mga pangyayari para sina Darth Vader at ang Emperor ang magmukhang masama. Mapapatunayan kung gaano ka-sira ang ulo ni George Lucas nang i-suggest nito na magkaroon ng romantikong relasyon ang magkapatid/kambal na sina Princess Leia at Luke Skywalker... buti nalang si Han Solo ang type ni Leia. Talagang todo effort nitong si George Lucas na ma-corrupt ang utak ng mga manonood. Hindi naman ako masyado na-apektuhan... Nang mapanood ko kasi ito noong bata, ang naintindihan ko lang sa StarWars eh -- tungkol ito kina R2D2 at C3P0.
Photos ctto.
"Retrace....and spin the thread of memory
Even if a thousand men forget the beauty
that you once were
you and I mustn't let it leave our hearts.
-Ah! My Goddess.
@Weatherthestorm
