@Talon 24 January 2022 more from that month

Disordered Okay, I know I said after my industrial training, I'll be more active on here, but that hasn't been the case and I take full responsibility for that, but in my defence, I've been busy than I thought I'll be. To be honest, even today, I don't really feel like reading or writing on here, but I figured I'm doing myself a disservice by not doing that. So, I'm really not going to be writing about a specific topic. This article will basically be a reflection of how I feel inside. Lately, I've been trending towards bland in terms of my emotions. Normally, I wouldn't bother about it as it usually comes and passes. But since the beginning of today, I've been feeling a flurry of different emotions. The only thing they all have in common is that they are negative. I feel sad, angry, useless, frustrated. It's also not the first time, I actually feel this way from time to time when I have a good amount of free time on my hand, in which I seem to take stock of my progress and find that I'm lagging behind. It all actually stems from a place and feeling of inadequacy, underestimating myself and downplaying my potentials. You would think since I know how it originates, I should be able to deal with it better, but that's not the case. The interesting thing is, while I know the root cause, I've never quite understand the immediate causes. It could be anything from a bad tasting food, missing lunch, seeing a stupid inscription on a T-shirt , it could really be anything. You shouldn't worry about me thought. It will probably pass by morning. I was watching a movie earlier, a movie titled "the killing of Kenneth Chamberlain". It's based on a real life story of a man whom suffered and lost his life at the hands of white police officers for the only through reason that he's black. Seeing what he went through, I instantly felt less like a human and more like an animal, a slave. It was a rare moment of true empathy coming from me, but it kind of open my eyes to see that 95% of the people who speak out against policy brutality anywhere in the world do not really know how much damage it causes. This is especially more so for racism in a country that's supposed to be a free country, I guess that's all political bradding. It's not my fault I was born black, I didn't chose to be black, so don't treat me anyhow on the basis of my colour. Don't punish me for being black. The movie happens to be one of the few movies that have successfully move me to tears, only about two or three movies have been able to do that before now. I felt so hurt by the movie that I've decided to work on a certain project for a month, maybe March. I'll let you guys have more details about it soon, probably after reviewing the movie. I totally recommend it to you, it'll be worth your time. This is just a rant. I'll probably start getting the feel of read.cash by tomorrow. ***Thanks for giving your time to go through my disordered rant***.