Mirror of the soul
Have you ever been curious how people manage to stay happy at all times? How can they smile even at the deepest and hardest situations in lives? Are they always like that? Or maybe they just are really happy about everything.
The eyes, people tend to smile often uaing their lips. Our lips can showcase bigger and brighter smiles that would lit up other people's world. Smiling is a sign of happiness and joy. Smiling means being out of sorrow. But despite this things, have you ever seen the mirror of our soul?
I was young when I knew what and where can I find someones true feelings. When I myself experienced the mwnt of faking. Smiling lips but crying eyes.
The eyes, the one and only mirror of the soul. The eyes that shows the deepest secrets of a person. The eyes that makes us see how beautiful this world is. The eyes that makes us see the smiles of people. But the eyes that also sees and hides sorrows.
When talking to someone always remember to look in the eyes. And see the mirror of the soul.
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I just wanted someone to listen.
This happened earlier, I had a midterm examination earlier. I was so excited because I can perfect the exam in just 25 minutes. Then when I submitted my answer, it showed that I only got half of the score. I mean, how? I checked it again. I answered them correctly, it was they key that my professor used. She got it wrong, she input wrong key to corrections. I was devastated as fuck, seriously fucking devastated. I ranted to my parents, but they just shouted at me. Telling me I'm a piece of shit. I'm no longer a baby to fucking cry.
I cried hard, I reviewed so hard til 1 am in the morning. I reviewed so hard to have good scores and grades. They don't know how pressured I was. How a simple low grade on quizzes affects my mental health as a college student.
Before I stepped in the university in my first year. I told myself I'll be a Dean's Lister, I got it on my first 3 semesters. I was a University Presidential Scholar, until I had this professor that seems to hate me and my friends. I got a grade of 2.25 in the whole section, all of us friends are the only ones who got those grades. I was devastated, I got removed as a Dean's Lister, I'm not a President scholar anymore.
I am.a grade conscious student. Ever since I put in mind. Graduating with Latin Honors will be such a blessing to have a good fucking work in the future and that was my plan. I planned to be a Magna Cum Laude or a Cum Laude. Because of this plans, I study hard, all night. I let myself be drawn in my own fucking world remembering a hundred scientists and hundred terminologies.
And a fucking exam could fucking break my heart.
I ranted because I want someone to listen.
That's just all.
I am having a hard time.
I am having a hard time right now. I don't feel like myself anymore. I don't feel the same.
This new normal in education is only stressing me out. Assignments became more heavier unlike the old times. Exams are coming and I haven't reviewed yet. I always feel sleepy. I felt so sleep deprived. I want to go back where it used to be.
Please Pray for the World.
Cake
Am I the only one who found comfort by watching cake decorating videos?
Look at these cake!
It uses whipped cream frosting in colors pastel pink and green. The pink became the base frosting if the cake and the green was used as decoration. (cactus design)
House Plan
I've been planning my future house for fucking 12am!
It's raining hard and the wind is f.reaking cold af. The typhoon is the reason my classes tomorrow is cancelled and here I am. Planning my house instead of reviewing for my coming recits.
Waaaaaah
To My Queen...
Kimberly "Billie" Hakenson.
The Miss Universe Cavite candidate for the Miss Universe Philippines.
She won as 4th runner up and I proudly say that she is a Queen to be.
She is my Queen, a bold and strong Queen that want to promote self awareness and loving and accepting ourselves.
To this lady, I wanted to say thankyou for fighting. Leading and gracefully representing the Historical Province of Cavite to the whole Country.
You showed everyone that a Caviteña is bold, independent fighter.
The land of the brave and born smart. Cavite.
Please read
This may sound ridiculous but yeah. Please upvote my articles😭
I badly wanna buy a exercise mat so that I can start exercising. I am someone that always have my knees dark whenever exercising and it's hard to turn it back to the natural color. I am one of those people who have dark scars and un easy to remove.
PLEASE I WANTED TO HAVE A FREAKING EXERCISE MAAAT. THE MONEY I'LL BE EARNING HERE WILL BE USED TO BUY ONE.
SO PLEASE.
To you.
You!
Yes you!!!!
If you feel like giving up today!
Please!!!!! Close your eyes!!!!
Yes close it!!!!
Breathe! And Relax!
Then think of happy memories!!!
Think about your dreams!!!
Think about why did you start this journey!!!!!
The future!
Yourself!
Keep going!
Keep striving!
Life would be hard, but that doesn't mean you can't make it!
Tears of Grey | Chap 1
**Warning: This chapter may contain violence, read at your own risk.**
"Happy Birthday Bea!"
Umalingawngaw ang mga boses ng aking mga kaibigan pag pasok ko ng restaurant. Seriously?
I smiled at them and walked quickly to give each of them a hug.
"Omygosh thankyou!"
I said cheerfully as we sat on our table. There are no other people in the restaurant aside from us. I guess they rented the place for me.
"Girl! Napakainit! Bakit naman naka longsleeves ka?"
I looked at Cindy, she's one of my college bestfriend who's always busy with her career.
I smiled at her and looked at Lian. She smiled at me apologetically.
"Uhm, wala lang, change of style! At ayoko mangitim no! Napakainit kaya!"
Masayang saad ko bago tumawa kunwari. Mukha namang nakuha iyon ni Cindy kaya't hindi na sya nagtanong pa.
Tinitigan lang ako ni Lian at Heidi, pilit na ngumiti ako sa kanila bago yumuko.
Foods were served at our table, most of them are my faves so I guess they personally requested it.
"You know what girl, answerte mo talaga!"
I turned my head to Cindy who's pointing at me. I wanted to laugh at what she said. Swerte? Kelan?
"How come naman?"
Nagtatakang tanong ni Lian dito bago dahan dahang sumisim sa kanyang wine.
Cindy turned to her with wide eyes.
"Hello! She married one of the finest bachelor for Pete's sake!"
Maarteng saad nito with her Duh look.
Napaubo ang aking mga kaibigan sa sinabi ni Cindy.
"Finest my ass"
Bulong ni Heidi sa aking tabi bago gigil na kinain ang karneng nakahain sa plato nya.
I just smiled at Cindy. Maybe she doesn't really know what's happening in my life. Of course she's also busy, and we're not really that close unlike Heidi and Lian.
Kumain na lamang kami habang nakikinig sa mga kwento ni Cindy. Cindy is a fashion model and busy with her career. But luckily she has free time today for my birthday, even though it was kinda short. I still appreciate it.
"**I'm sorry** guys, I have a sudden meeting today"
Malungkot na saad ni Cindy habang namamaalam sa kanyang pag alis. A while ago her manager called her for a new endorsement, and asking her right now for the meeting.
"Happy Birthday again Bea! I love you guys! Mwuah!"
She said and kissed our cheeks one by one before heading out of the restaurant.
Napabuntong hininga ako at lumingon kay Lian at Heidi na nakataas ang mga kilay sakin ngayon.
"He did it again huh?"
Heidi asked looking annoyed. Napairap lamang si Lian bago tinitigan akong mabuti.
I sighed and pulled the sleeves of my shirt up showing them my arms. They gasped when they saw my bruises.
I smiled sadly and sighed.
"It's not that aching anymore, and it's fine now"
I gave them reassuring smile but they just bit their lips. I saw how tears cascade down their cheeks.
They both reached for my hand and looked at me.
"W-Why not....just break him up?"
Heidi gripped on my hand as she cries.
Malungkot, masakit, I hate how I see my best friends cry because of me.
Umiling lamang ako sa kanya at kinagat ang aking labi. I felt tears run down my cheeks as they both stood up and hugged me.
I cried my heart out to them. Knowing atleast I have some people who cares at me. People who stands by me and understands why I am like this.
Martyr.
"Papalampasin namin to... Please"
Mahinang bulong ni Lian sa akin habang hinahagod ang likod ko. Tahimik lamang akong umiiyak sa kanilang dalawa sa aking tabi.
"But if this happened again...please... Tama na Bea... tama na..."
She cried begging me, her begs makes me sad. I know how mad she is, how mad she and Heidi is for my stupidity.
I just nodded and cried my heart out again.
**I looked** at my hands that are now trembling in fear. Nasa sasakyan na ko pauwe dahil tumawag sakin si Manang Rose na nandoon na sa mansyon ang asawa ko, galit at nakakatakot.
After hearing those words from her I had no choice but to leave my friends and go home. I have to, ayokong may madamay dahil sa kagagawan ko.
It's been a year after graduating and marrying one of the finest bachelor in the country. And it has been the year I dreamed of but suddenly became a nightmare, a fucking nightmare.
Lalo akong kinabahan ng magbukas ang gate ng masyon at dare daretsong pumasok ang kotse.
"Ma'am"
Mahinang tawag sakin ni Manong Badong. I know na kabado din siya dahil siya ang sinama ko. And I can't fucking do anything kapag nadamay sila. But no, I won't let that happen.
Bumaba ako ng sasakyan kasunod si Manong Badong at dali dali akong pumasok sa double doors ng mansyon.
Rinig na rinig ang kulog na boses at pagkabasag ng mga kagamitan sa kusina.
I hurriedly run to the kitchen only to see broken plates and foods scattered on the floor. And there is a man, standing with his white button dress.
"E-Eze-k-kiel"
I called with my trembling voice, I saw how Manang Rose's eye turned towards me with sadness.
Pinigil ko ang panginginig ng humarap sakin ang aking asawa na puno ng galit ang mga mata.
He walked towards me glaring, his eyes feels like daggers that would stab my soul.
He stopped exactly infront of me that made me bow my head.
No... No...
I kept praying in my mind that I won't get a beating just for today.
"I-I'm s-sorry"
My voice broke as tears started streaming down my cheeks. I felt myself trembling afraid of what he would do.
Nag angat ako ng tingin sa kanya ng walang marinig na kahit ano.
"I-I j-just celebrated w-w-with my friends a-an-"
I was cut off and stumble down the floor. I heard gasped from the maids and Manag Rose.
I bit my lip and tasted blood on it, again, here we go again.
I gently wipe the tears from my eyes and looked at my husband who's now bending down to face me.
I looked at his cold eyes, this eyes, when will I see them shine for me?
"Ahh!"
Napadaing ako ng biglang higitin nya ang buhok ko mula sa likod. Napaigik ako ng mas higpitan nya ito.
"You can celebrate this fucking year huh? How? How?!!!"
He growled in my face and pulled my hair tighter this time. Napakagat ako sa aking labi upang pigilan ang pag labas ng hikbi.
I'm sorry... Is all that I can say.
"You can fucking celebrate while I am fucking drowning because of you!"
He shouted and then let my hair go harshly, before holding me in my arms.
Napaigik ako ng mahawakan nya ang mga pasa ko doon. Marahas nya kong hinigit patayo.
"H-Hijo"
I looked at Manang Rose and the other maids who's watching while crying in pity.
I just bit my lips and bowed down. I know how much they wanted to help me, but cannot cause they'll be hurt or loss their job.
"Clean the mess. No one will fucking celebrate"
Mariing saad ni Ezekiel bago ako marahas na higit pataas ng hagdan.
I stumbled so many times but he just kept on pulling me. Not caring if I was hurt or what.
Binuksan nya ang kwarto ko bago ako marahas na itunulak papasok.
I fell on the floor while he was standing infront. He closed the door and locked it.
I heard knocks from outside, Manang Rose is outside.
"Hijo! Ezekiel! Wag! Tama na! Nagmamakaawa ako!"
Rinig na rinig ang humahangos na sigaw ni Manang Rose sa labas ng pinto. Nagmamakaawa sa asawa kong huwag akong saktan.
But Ezekiel didn't mind her. He stared at me blankly as he remove his belt.
Naramdaman ko ang takot dahil don. No.
He successfully removed it and rolled it to his hands. Looking someone from the movies, father's beating their child with their belts.
"E-Eze-kiel"
Nanginginig na tawag ko sa kanyang pangalan habang nakatitig sa abo nyang mga mata.
"You will regret every damn fucking year, every damn fucking day, every damn seconds of your fucking life Beatrice"
He said as her walks closer to me.
I heard more sobs outside the room before I felt the stinging pain.
I just kept myself on the floor, whimpering and crying with his forceful hits.
I cried and cried as he hit me with his belt continuously and forcefully.
He looked so mad like a devil. But why does my heart kept on beating for this man? Why do I still love this man?
"Ahhh!"
I screamed when he hit my legs so much, I saw how my jeans were stained with bloods from me.
I closed my eyes, thinking what I have done to deserve this?
But despite this physical pain, I am now living my dream. I married the man I love.
"You will fucking regret marrying me"
Filipina Beauty.
The Miss Universe Philippines will have it's coronation night later this evening. I just wanted to share to you how proud I am to my Provinces' candidate.
Miss Cavite is a strong, fierce and independent woman. She is promoting self awareness to young ones and is true to herself.
I adore her for being strong and fierce in the stage and in her life. She has the beauty of a woman I wanted to be.
Miss Billie Hakenson, a flight attendant and a beautiful strong woman. Representing the historical province of Cavite. The land of the brave and the born smart.
Rainy Day
I remember that day, when the skies are crying as I am. The day when my clouds turns dark and stormy, as I felt how my heart shattered at everything.
I remember how you told me the words I never thought would break me whole. I remember how you told me you love me from the very first day, telling me it will never end. But then, that rainy day, was the end.
It was raining like crazy as my eyes kept on crying too. Hoping you would stop talking just pull me and hug me tight like what you always do. But no, the day you told me you love me, that it was never ending ended.
It was raining, as my eyes cry with sorrow as I look at you. Your back slowly fading, leaving me shattering at the words you've told me. How you told me 'I'm sorry, it ended right now at this rainy day'.
Did it change? Please answer.
Hello goodmorning! I just wanna ask if the way of earning in read.cash changed?
We earn by posting, commenting and liking right? Then upvotes are just bonuses?
I've been posting yesterday so many times. Got upvotes so many times too. And I woke up to open this and found no points.
What happened? Please answer me.
Oreo Ice cream Roll (Good for Business recipe)
NO ICE CREAM MAKER?!!!!!
THIS RECIPE IS GOOD FOR BUSINESS AND VERY DELICIOUS. YOU CAN MAKE THIS WITHOUT ICE CREAM MAKER.
Oreo Ice cream Roll Ingredients:
740ml all purpose cream (chilled overnight)
410ml evaporated milk (chilled overnight)
585g condensed milk (chilled overnight)
1 cup Oreo Vanilla Cream, semi crushed
3 cups crushed Oreo vanilla cream
2 tbsp Vanilla extract(optional)
(PLEASE MAKE SURE THE CREAM AND MILK ARE CHILLED OVERNIGHT. BECAUSE IF NOT, THE CREAM WON'T DOUBLE AND WILL JUST HAVE A GOOEY CONSISTENCY)
We need:
ice
ice bag/ice wrapper: 4"x 12"(size)
Aluminum foil
Clear pack loaf small(optional)
Oreo Ice cream roll procedure:
In a bowl combine evaporated milk and condensed milk. Mix well. *chill milk mixture while whipping the cream. Set up: get a big basin. Add ice and place mixing bowl or big stainless pot over the ice. Whip all purpose cream for 10 minutes on high speed. Gradually add milk mixture and whip for another 5 minutes. Mix in Vanilla extract. Fold in semi crushed oreo. Fill ice bag with ice cream mixture. *fill the bag about 240g of ice cream mixture. Tie the ice bag to lock it. Repeat steps for the remaining mixture. Freeze overnight. Unwrap ice cream roll. Coat with crushed oreos. Wrap in foil. Freeze for 1-2 hours or until it sets
Mango Graham Ice cream Roll (Good for Business Recipe)
NO ICE CREAM MAKER?!!!
THIS RECIPE IS GOOD FOR BUSINESS AND SUPER DELICIOUS! YOU DON'T NEED AN ICE CREAM MAKER FOR THIS!
Mango Graham Ice cream Roll ingredients:
740ml all purpose cream (chilled overnight)
410ml evaporated milk (chilled overnight)
585g condensed milk (chilled overnight)
1 1/4 cup sweet mangoes, diced (more if needed)
1 1/2 cup graham crackers, semi crushed
3 cups crushed grahams (more if needed)
**(PLEASE MAKE SURE THE CREAM AND MILK ARE CHILLED OVERNIGHT. BECAUSE IF NOT, THE CREAM WON'T DOUBLE AND WILL JUST HAVE A GOOEY CONSISTENCY)**
**We need**:
ice
ice bag/ice wrapper: 4"x 12"(size)
Aluminum foil
Clear pack loaf small(optional)
**Mango Graham Ice cream Roll procedure**:
In bowl combine evaporated milk and condensed milk. Mix well. *chill milk mixture while whipping the cream. Set up: get a big basin. Add ice and place mixing bowl or big stainless pot over the ice. Surround the mixing bowl with ice. Whip all purpose cream for 10 minutes on high speed. Gradually add milk mixture and whip for another 5 minutes. Fold in mango cubes or cuts and semi crushed grahams. Fill ice bag with ice cream mixture. *fill the bag about 240g of ice cream mixture. Tie the ice bag to lock it. Repeat steps for the remaining mixture. Freeze overnight
**Coating**: Combine crushed grahams and melted butter. Unwrap ice cream roll. Coat ice cream roll with crushed grahams evenly.*Repeat steps for the remaining mixture. wrap in foil and Freeze for 1-2 hours or until it sets
Turkish Delight of Narnia
Sugar syrup ingredients:
1 1/2 cups water
3 3/4 cups white sugar
Cornstarch paste:
2 cups water
1 cup cornstarch
1 tsp cream of tartar
flavor and color:
1 1/2 tbsp vanilla extract
2-3 drops red food color (depends on the color you like)
Coating:
1/2 cup cornstarch(more if needed)
NOTE: you can add powdered sugat for coating if you wanted but as for me I like the coating plain.
Procedure:
In a pot combine water, white sugar. Turn the heat on and stir until sugar dissolves. Bring to a boil. Continue boiling over med. low heat for 10min. and continue stirring. In a separate pot combine water, cornstarch and cream of tartar. Mix well until no lumps. Turn the heat on and keep stirring until it becomes a thick paste. Gradually add sugar syrup into the paste and mix after each addition. Reduce heat to low and simmer mixture for 1hr.& 15min. Stir mixture frequently. Turn the heat off and add vanilla extract and red food color. Pour mixture onto the greased mold and dust the surface part of turkish delight. Let it set up for 5hr. or overnight.
Coating:
Dust counter top with cornstarch. Loosen the edges and flip it onto the counter top. Peel the parchment paper of and Add cornstarch and Cut it into small cubes. Dredge cubes into the cornstarch and place it in a airtight container.
NOTE
This is mildly sweet. Some peopl put too much sugar but for me I don't like too sweet. And you need strong arms in cooking this.
Terrorism and State Terrorism
What is the relationship between terrorism and state terrorism?
Terrorism is Violence, or the threat of violence against non combantants or civilians, usually motivated by political, religious or ideological beliefs. Terrorrism is not an organized crime it is politically and socially motivated, It also wants to seek media attention and terrorist group wants to recognized by the government. According to book of ROUTLEDGE - HANDBOOKS OF CRITICAL TERRORISM STUDIES, Terrorism is the strategically indiscriminate harming or threat of harming members of a target group in order to influence the psychological states of an audience group in ways the perpetrators anticipate be beneficial to the advancement of their agenda.
State terrorism is an act of violence perpetrated by the officials of a state or their agents. It is done to intend a message to people either in a limited scale or generalized population. State terrorism instill fear to people by violence, most commonly by torture, disappearance and illegal arbitrary detentions.
State terrorism has no difference with the non state terrorism, in some terms of it’s constituent features. The common definitions of terrorism has three key elements. First, terrorism involves threatened or perpetrated violence directed to a victim. Second, the violence actor wanted to cause fear to the witnesses. Third is that the violence actor expects the witnesses to alter the behavior that he have shown (Walter 1969). State terrorism to be done needs a fourth element, the act is performed by people on behalf of the state. This may include para military and the security agents of the states against the individuals or somehow innocent people.
As with non-state terrorism, state terrorism has a purpose. As political scientist Ruth Blakely notes, state terrorism is not only about the destruction of those targeted, but it is also driven by the “opportunity afforded by the harm to terrorize others.” In other words, what unites these acts is an aspiration to punish but to intimidate more widely as well. Based on recent events, such a desire on the part of a wide variety of states shows no sign of dissipating anytime soon..
Terrorism and state terrorism had been connected to political gains of higher people on positions and some officials. State terrorism somehow been a proof of using the fear of the people for political gains and it has been the most effective way of making people to conform to a certain rule, law or state. They’re differences between non state terrorist and state terrorist. State terrorist is within the state, on the other hand the terrorist group is somehow wide range, Terrorist group can dominate one nation or state.
Some were takien from a study.
Lady
Ladies...
IF WANNA BE SEXY DO IT FOR YOURSELF!!!!
NOT BECAUSE...
NOT BECAUSE YOUR FUCKING BOYFRIEND TOLD YOU SO!!!!
NOT BECAUSE PEOPLE TOLD YOU YOU SHOULD!!!!!
NOT BECAUSE YOU ENVY PEOPLE WITH THAT BODY!!!!!!
DO IT BECAUSE YOU LOVE YOURSELF?!!!!!
AND YOU SEE
THAT YOU ARE WORTHY OF EVERYTHING
THAT YOU ARE A GEM THAT SHOULD SHINE AT EVERY MOMENT. EITHER IN THE SUN OR THE MOON AND STARS. YOU WILL SHINE.
Should I be afraid?
So seriously a friend of mine order 4 packs of Turkish Delights from me. Which was delivered yesterday and should've been paid yesterday too. But, unfortunately she said that she had no money in her pocket and she will send it to my virtual wallet. So, I agreed and went home after waiting for her to send it. I wanted the whole night and no signs or chat was sent to me regarding the payment. Then the morning came and still nothing on my fucking wallet.
I chatted her regarding the payment and she told me that she sent it last night. But what, I didn't received even a penny. So I confirmed to her that I don't receive any and she said that she will fix it.
That's just a hundred and sixty! Man I will use it as capital for my homebased business like wtf? PAY MEEEE WAAAAAH.
I'LL WAIT COZ I FUCKING TRUST MY BEST FRIEND.
Gift for Women (Please Read)
HEY!
I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU FEEL RIGHT NOW.
BUT
I WANTED TO REMIND YOU
THAT NO MATTER HOW THE WORLD STRESS THE HELL IN YOU.
OR HOW PEOPLE JUDGE YOU BY THEIR STARES
HOW PEOPLE MAKE FUN OF YOU BEING A WOMAN
DAMN GIRL!
GENDER STEREOTYPES SUCKS AND THEY SHOULD SUCK THEIR ASSES!
BECAUSE YOU!!!!
A WOMAN!!!!
CAN DO EVERYTHING SHE WANTS!!!!
SHE LIKES!!!!!
AND WHOEVER SHE WANTED TO BE!!!!!!
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL WHAT EVER COLOR YOUR SKIN IS!!!!!
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL WHAT EVER TYPE OF NOSE YOU HAVE!!!!!
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!
DON'T MAKE THOSE JUDGEMENTAL EYES SHINE AS THEY JUDGE YOU!!!!!!
PEOPLE OUT THERE ARE HOLDING THEIR BREATH JUST TO SEE YOU FAIL!!!!!
SO FUCKING MAKE SURE THE SUFFOCATE!!! 😉
@Rui
