I want stability in a man.
*“The greatest thing you'll ever learn is to love and be loved in return.”*
Natalie Cole https://www.womansday.com/relationships/g20888175/relationship-quotes/
*Yesterday, I couldn't believe today will be Saturday. How time flies so quickly! When did we start this week, and we are ending it in a few hours.*
*This is the reason we should keep going with our goals because time waits for no man. Before we know it, this year will end and we start a new year. Above all, what matters is that we are still alive and breathing. That's something we should always be grateful for because we do not deserve it but it's Grace.*
Every lady wants the best, including me. We all want a man who is doing okay, and not the one struggling to make ends meet. Such a guy does not even need to have a girlfriend or fiancee yet, or else, both of them might suffer.
Some ladies have a principle now; if he doesn't have it all, I won't love him. A real man will never accept you too if he discovers the reason you are in a relationship with him.
But despite all of these, don't you think a lady would be deceiving herself if her love is based on a guy's stability? I mean, she is loving the guy for all he has which I would say such love can never last.
A woman also needs to fend for herself and not go with the mentality that the man should provide all for her because they are in a relationship. A lady should work to be independent. At least one plus one makes it two which is better when supporting each other.
Even aside from meeting a man who is in all areas stable, would you still go ahead to cheat on him?
Love shouldn't depend on how much a guy has. Everyone needs to work hard to help each other and not leave the task to the man alone. Even when he has it all, he would still appreciate it when his girlfriend does something for him. Don't just be with an empty brain in your relationship.
Also, cheating when he has everything would make you lose all.
There was a lady in a movie I watched. It was obvious she loved him for his stability. The guy has everything a lady wanted to care for her. He loves her truly but she fucked up when she invited her ex into her fiance's home.
No matter what you do or trying to do, it's risky inviting an ex over to your man's house. What effrontery? If it's with your man's permission, it is still allowed but if not, you don't even have any business with your ex.
***Someone ask me a question; Will you still be friends with your ex again?***
The thing is this; it's not a bad idea to make friends with your ex after a breakup but be careful. If you cannot handle or control it, you should decline such an idea. It takes a mature person who isn't controlled by anything to do that. Even aside from that, your meeting point should be at an open place and anything aside from that, you are calling for big trouble.
The ex explained he had got a Job and can take care of her. Why did they break up? The lady looked less on him and taught him he wouldn't become someone, and she went for a man who could provide all her needs. She still loves him but didn't have a choice.
The ex wanted her back. They both kissed and that was the end of it.
The real man got to know she was only in his life for his money and nothing else.
Some ladies are just not contented. Even if you are with another person, do away with your feelings for the past relationships and start a new life with someone new.
A man's stability shouldn't determine if you should love him or not. It's bad because such a relationship will never last.
To be sincere, I want a man who would be able to provide for all my needs, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't help too. Not depending fully on him earns me some respect. Don't you think?
Ladies, know what you want in a man first even before you opt into any relationship with him and if you think you just want to spend his money and later leave, that is a bad intention from you.
`I was happy to see` @fantagira `came around yesterday. She renewed my sponsorship which I really appreciate. It's been a while ma, and I hope you are doing good?`
Thanks for your time
Images by Toa Heftiba from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/wyHS87kKh5o
[August 27, 2022] (No 238 articles for the year)
My passion: Not regretting it.
*“Marry your purpose. Make love with your passion. Everything else in your life in connected to these two.”*
Hiral Nagda https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/follow-your-passion
**YOLO!** *“You only live once”.* This is something very popular everywhere as we are reminded that life isn't all about wallowing in pain or torturing yourself over a heartbreak or loss of a loved one, or even taking a decision that turned the other way round for you, in which you do not expect it to happen that way.
Life is all about making mistakes, that is normal, but it becomes pathetic for you when you choose to remain isolated because of the way things had become of you. There's no way to learn anything that way.
Some of the things we are doing today, make us regret the terrible decision we made yesterday, even though some are deliberate and some are not. By the time, you start seeing the result, you bite your fingers and be like “I shouldn't have done this”, “I wouldn't have chosen this path if not for....”, “I could have just gone this way then...”
But, it's not the end of the world! We just need to pull ourselves together, get up, learn from bad decisions and errors, and become something new. Everybody's got a choice.
***The one thing I will never regret in my life is following my passions.***
Passion differs from purpose. We must understand both, because what you enjoy is not the same as what you are called to do. We only arrived on this earth to choose our passions. This is something you would like to commit your life to doing, regardless of what obstacles might present themselves to you because you enjoyed doing it.
I am passionate about teaching and becoming a writer.
I don't think I would ever want to regret taking this path of my journey in life because with these two things, I am passionate about them and I wouldn't hesitate to go the extra length to have my way surviving with both.
Sometimes, my Big Sis made me think I wasn't serious about my life because of some of the things she wants me to do and focus on. Ever since I tried to explain to her that this is not my strong suit, she still wants us (my other siblings and I) to go that way.
She wants the best for her younger ones, which I do not, and will not dispute the fact about it, and she wants us not to settle for less, but it's high time she understood that we all have our different ways.
Do I want to confuse my readers? Tsk! Sniffles! Wait and read on because I'm going to explain my point of view clearly and concisely. 😎
The need to enter the digital world with skills is what she always stressed about, and not just a skill, but to learn how to code and become a programmer. The first day I heard her telling me this, I laughed and she could read the expression on my face that day saying “that way isn't for me at all.” She still doesn't believe I work presently when I keep telling her, I am surviving by being a content creator online.
OK, to satisfy her, I took a course in online website development and I informed her that I'm already on it. She was really happy and guided me to major courses to take.
My fellow readers! I was getting along with this HTML code which I found fascinating enough, but to my greatest surprise, I never knew I was taken from a simple illustration to a complex one and I noticed, that I stopped having time for what I am passionate about, which is writing and being active online.
I entered the CSS (Cascading Style Sheet) code, but believe me, I couldn't proceed. My head was spinning and I began to have headaches and body temp. This was when I knew, that's not my forte at all, but writing and teaching, because I discovered that I'm good, and that I can express myself through both.
I gave up the course and started taking classes to become a better blogger and writer. Until now, I have learned a great deal from the courses I have taken, and I continue to go further. I never knew there was more to writing than this one I make, and I can't wait to explore more areas on it.
With this being said, I don't think I will ever regret following my passions in both teaching and writing because I find myself sitting and relaxing comfortably on them instead of the website development of a thing.
Thanks for your time
Images by Aaron and Adam from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/y02jEX_B0O0 https://unsplash.com/photos/7fF0iei80AQ
[August 26, 2022] (No 237 articles for the year)
My Routine plus a day missed.
*“Life is not what you expect: it is made up of the most unexpected twists and turns.”*
Ilaiyaraaja https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/ilaiyaraaja_1014261?src=t_unexpected
Let me start first with how I missed a day posting here, and I feel so bad about it. I know there are things we cannot control again because it is gone. We can only work towards having a better moment and making amends, so things like that don't repeat itself.
I have never missed a day posting since my one year and six months stay on Readcash, and yesterday was never expected. I didn't mean to.
I already woke up early yesterday to draft my article, and was waiting for 11 am so I could hit the publish button. My mind wasn't there again, as I forgot totally, and I thought I already posted, not knowing I was wrong.
Waking up this morning and while in the toilet, I took my phone with me. Bad habit right? Yes, you would say! But I have been used to it, especially when I am still observing my morning devotion and I needed to use the toilet, I take my phone along to continue with it. So I won't have to waste time on it.
As I got to the toilet and decided to check the comments of my previous post which I thought I posted, I saw ***“not yet published”.*** I screamed from the toilet, and immediately smiled back because it was funny.
So, I didn't post yesterday? I was shocked and was like *“I missed a day for the first time”* It hurts, but I don't have a choice but to keep the post for tomorrow.
That was my reason for missing a day. So sad! Can someone comfort me later? 😂😂😂
MY ROUTINE EVERY DAY FOR THREE WEEKS.
The reason I wanted to make this post is that I already promised @BlueFlipper to make mine after reading hers some days ago, and I found it interesting. I decided to write about mine since I have noticed and saw how constant it has been for me.
It's been three weeks without changing this routine of mine and I don't want to change it for now, even though we cannot predict what could happen in some months to come. It will change especially when I am posted for my NYSC service, but for now, I should stick to it as I find it interesting and productive for me.
It has been my normal pattern to wake up at 5 am, and most times before 6 am to observe my morning devotion and pray to God which lasts for an hour or a few minutes after.
`Immediately I wake up, I take a glass cup of water, and I never missed a day drinking this very early in the morning before doing anything.`
By 7 am, I quickly prepare an article for Blurt Blockchain. Though I get it drafted every night and I only need to edit and proofread. My constant time I post is 8 am and I don't like it being exceeded the normal time. So, after being done with that, I sweep the floor and arrange the room.
Still checking the time and once it's 8 am, I post on Blurt. The next thing for me is to take my bath and look beautiful with my face having a little touch of powder and a light pink lip gloss.
Once I am done, I prepare a little milk to keep me balanced before taking my meal.
During that time, I play music on my phone until 9 am. Thank God I installed the Spotify app last week and I have switched from it to listening to different songs on it. This always lift my mood and help me stay positive.
Once it's 9 am, I start my day's work on Readcash and stay for two hours visiting articles. This only lasts for two hours, and I take a break. During the break, I find something to prepare and eat.
After two hours break, I move on to Hive to do something too. By this time, I would have posted on Readcash and focused on Hive for a while until I am tired and needed to rest.
My routine continues like this until evening and by then, I would have covered everything online including, posting on three platforms, doing my Dreemport task, curating for Blurttribe community, chatting on WhatsApp etc.
By night, I move on to my online class and take it for an hour. Then close for the day. Since I have visited more than 15-20 articles on Readcash, I close up from the site and stay on Hive till I get tired and need to sleep.
The next day, the routine continues and this has been on for three weeks and so far, it has helped me focus and be productive at the end.
I love this routine as it helps me plan my day carefully and I make sure I get all done without being distracted. This helps when I put my phone in “do not disturb” mode. It has worked for me and will continue to work for me.
At this moment, I thought of changing my schedule for posting on Hive. I might shift to posting later in the evening instead of the early morning that I do before. I don't want to choke myself. I understand this pattern.
Still hurts that I missed a day for the first time, but it's all good.
Thanks for your time
Image by Dominik from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/nzus-1oiN0A
[August 25, 2022] (No 236 articles for the year)
Overcome your fear through these methods.
*“To escape fear, you have to go through it, not around.”*
Richie Norton https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/overcoming-fear
According to English Dictionary, fear is defined as a strong, uncontrollable, unpleasant emotion or feeling caused by actual or perceived danger or threat.
In another word, we can say, fear is defined as a feeling of distress, that comes as a result of danger; either real or imagined. Everyone has fear in them which is caused by different things happening around them.
*For instance, I talked of a relative of mine who has been kidnapped for more than two weeks now, and it's crazy to see that they are demanding for 60million as ransom. Where would that come from? My fear here is for him not to be killed. He lost his wife some months back, leaving him with two little kids. That is my fear right now.*
For another person, they might be threatened for one thing or the other, and that is where fear comes into the picture.
**The feeling is real and it's part of our lives, which is normal.**
When we study the book of Isaiah, chapter 41 very well, this was written during the time of exile with the Israelites. The passage is a reminder that, despite the people of Israel being in distress, oppression and challenges, they do not need to fear or worry about anything.
At that time, they were disconnected from God, their maker, but God never because that, leave them alone. He knew they disobeyed Him, but He stayed with them still.
God told the people of Israel that despite those circumstances, “I am with you to strengthen, help and sustain you.” Our God is near and He never abandoned us.
Joshua 1:9 is a promise to hold onto when we are in fear. When we feel things are going tougher than we could imagine. He has said we should not be discouraged or terrified, but be courageous at all times, because He is with us wherever we go.
*Feeling fear is not bad; it makes us human. The problem lies in allowing ourselves to be dominated by it.*
Fear weakens our spirit and mind when we focus too much on the circumstances, and do not find solutions or look up to God.
Now, let's see it this way; let's imagine fear and faith produces very similar emotions. With a tone of doubt, fear asks *“What will happen if I take this step?” “How sure am I getting a good result with this method?”,* Faith would ask the same questions, but with a tone of hope, encouragement, expectation, Joy, and courage believing in what God can do.
All things are possible with God if we believe that. Fear is nothing in the presence of God.
Have you ever felt fear and it makes you think God's face is far away from you?
**How do we overcome the fear in us?**
*The first thing is knowing to whom we belong.*
Just as Joshua 1:8-9 says, “do not be anxious or afraid......”. One thing to know is that we are for God and His love radiates on us. We belong to the God of love, mercy, and grace.
It is only when we believe that God is far away from us, that fear rules and dominate our lives. When we truly know who we belong to, we would rest upon the promises of God to be with us wherever we may find ourselves.
*Another way is applying faith at all times.*
There is nothing strong as faith in us. When we believe the word of God over us, we would be able to overcome and conquer fear.
Belief is the antidote to fear and dread. We can never overcome fear when we do not take a step of faith.
So, let's walk by faith, and not by fear.
*By changing our thought patterns.*
Just like the power of effect. Whatever you think of in your mind, it happens, and it's just like a magnet. When we speak positive words into our minds, our thoughts send the signal to our brain and it works.
When we are faced with challenges or circumstances, our thoughts often go into autopilot. This is when we lean towards fear or faith. The two cannot go together.
So, whenever we feel this way, it's time to change our mindset and thought pattern to focus only on trusting God and having faith.
This is why it is important to always study the word of God, and let it rule your mind and thoughts instead of fear.
*Confronting our fears face to face.*
When you are in a circumstances, you have to face them quickly and not let them keep resting and making you feel you can't do it. Face those circumstances by getting up and finding solutions and don't forget that it is all about prayer too. Focus on the word of God and take action to solve them.
We cannot avoid these battles surrounding us, but we can be rest assured that we can face them when we know God is with us.
Do not be discouraged but trust God and His word.
Thanks for your time.
Image by Sammie from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/Zdf3zn5XXtU
[August 23, 2022] (No 235 articles for the year)
Who is my neighbour?
*“The only way we will love our neighbour as ourselves is by getting to know our neighbours, even in our differences.”*
Eric Overby https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/love-your-neighbor#:~:text=The%20only%20way%20to%20truly,with%20them%2C%20by%20conversation.%E2%80%9D&text=%E2%80%9CLove%20thy%20neighbor%20as%20thyself,must%20love%20thyself%20whole%2Dheartedly.
*Yesterday was the start of a new week, but I decided to take a break from social media as I noticed, wasn't in the mood at all. I came back from Church, found something to prepare, and was on WhatsApp all through. I think it's better because I know such a long moment wouldn't be spent on WhatsApp starting from Monday. I need time to grind more this week and achieve my target.*
*I was excited by a friend to open up to me about his problem, and I was glad I could help because he didn't know I could until he approached me. I told him you don't know someone until you move closer to him or her. We were only just friends and greeting each other, but it went formally yesterday, and I enjoyed our chats. At least, it made my day and took my focus away from online activities.*
*So, let's slide into today's article.....*
**Love your neighbour as yourself.** Whether you are familiar with the Bible or not, you must have heard of this phrase before, because it is very common. This particular command was first written in the old testament (Leviticus 19:18) and in that scripture, we were told not to seek revenge or hold any grudge against people.
What comes to your mind when you are being told or commanded to love your neighbour? In the literal sense, a neighbour in this context would mean someone living next to our door right?
The word neighbour in the Hebrew means “plesion” and this means friend or any other person. We are supposed to love everyone! Not only that brother or sister living next door to yours. So, to put it this way; ***Love every person as yourself.***
How do you love another person when you haven't even shown yourself, love? How do you love when you haven't shown love to your heavenly father?
The first commandment which comes before that is to love God with all your heart, soul and body. Then, the second which looks similar to it go the way like the above one.
**How do you then show love to someone?**
*The argumentative family member*
*The frustrating lady or guy down the street*
*The cheating partner*
*The murderer*
*The friendly man at the grocery store etc*
That's quite a lofty command, isn't it? But with all sincerity, it's essential and required of us to love everyone regardless of their actions or behaviours. At least, God has loved us unconditionally, and we are to extend such great love to our neighbour.
It's such a challenging command and it feels unattainable when we have to weigh or judge people's actions to measure up to our love for them.
It might appear more realistic when the Bible put it this way; *“Love your neighbour, only when they are being nice to you” and “Do not love them when they do bad to you.”* At least you get a pass for that.
But Jesus was pretty clear and specific in His command, “Love your neighbour as yourself and at all times.”
So, how do we love our neighbours? It's simple! We love God first, then ourselves second. When we love God first, it means we receive and accept His love because He first loved us. God's love for us is unconditional and sometimes, it difficult to explain, and harder to display such kind of love.
His love is unfathomable. This is why sometimes we often sink to the level of loving other people only when it's convenient for us.
Learning to love ourselves because of the value we see in Jesus which is indescribable will help and enable us to love our neighbours.
Thanks for your time
Image by Johnny Gios from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/3ntBdQ56Slo
**[August 22, 2022] (No 234 articles for the year)**
Why I chose Guidance and Counselling as my course.
*“In many ways, life has presented us with something different from what we had planned and thought. Life is unpredictable, and we have no idea what might happen next.”*
Princessbusayo
Every one of us has planned, and got prepared for some events in our lives, but along the way, things turned the other way round, and we find ourselves doing the opposite of what we ever wanted.
While growing up, I saw how I wanted to go to the University, I planned to study Business Administration, but I never knew this was how things would turn out.
Through this process, I learned about my love for teaching and writing. Both skills came out when I never expected them and I would say, God's plan came out greater than mine.
I did my first Jamb in 2012 and scored 221. I chose Unilorin (University of Ilorin) with the course **“Business Administration”** but I was not accepted. The only chance was for me to go to a College of Education. I might have gone to polytechnic, but I had no idea.
Without knowing it for myself, I learned that I got an admission to the Polytechnic after three years of study at the College of Education to study “Early Childhood Education”. I was too naive and didn't find someone to explain things to me.
After then, I went for my degree and was given Guidance and Counselling. I never wanted this course because of the belief of people that it was a simple course that is only given to those whose ability cannot carry other courses. They thought G&C is for dullard and a boring one, not until I got to the second semester (level 200), so I realized these people saying this doesn't know what's in it.
It was then that my love for this course began to grow because I was told that Guidance and Counselling were not what we thought it to be. It goes deeper than its ordinary meaning. There is more to this course than an ordinary person considers it in a simple way.
I was pleased to learn about this course and learn more about certain myths.
**WHY DID I CHOOSE THIS COURSE?**
Well, I never voluntarily picked this course, but circumstances made it possible. It wasn't what I wanted to study at the beginning, but it happened, and I can't change that. But, I ended up loving the course and would say it proudly when someone asks what course I'm studying or have I studied?
I am now a Graduate of Guidance and Counselling, even though I am still waiting for my results to be out, but I think, just like I said that it was God's plan, knowing how much I love to teach, and give advice and help young children.
First thing first, I want to say that, in my country, this course has been underrated because of some people who think and ask “what is the use of the course when everyone could just advise anyone going through a problem and that is it?”
I would reject that concept and say, this course is more than what you had seen it to be.
In the olden days, we know how Guidance and Counselling was, and how parents would sit their children down and advise them, or when a child is going through a problem, they wouldn't go deeper into finding the right solution, but resorted to going diabolical about it. They think that all issues are centered around being spiritual.
Now that the world has evolved and technology has been invented, you cannot continue to believe and suppose that every problem is spiritual. But not everyone wants to think so. Therapy must be done and some specialists and psychologists must be able to find the root of the problem.
***Note that counselors are also therapists or psychologists because they always do the same job using theories and approaches.***
A couple having problems in their home needs a good therapist to diagnose them and come up with the right therapy to test them. There is more to this course than to narrow it down to such a sense.
Guidance and counseling are really helpful for everybody, including children who need attention and focus on their studies.
You wouldn't want to say that a kid with a school issue is spiritual. There is a need for a professional school counselor or therapist to check the child's background, and trace his problem to find a solution to what is happening in his life.
Not all things calls for prayer and deliverance. All you need is the right person to help them heal.
Everyone experiences different problems in their lives, marriages, health, which would end up turning into depression, disorders like amnesia, dementia, psychopathy, delinquency, etc.
Only by tracing this problem to the victim's origin or past experiences would the victim receive the proper treatment and become normal.
***Do you now see how this course is not easy or made for dullards?***
Thanks for your time
Image by Element5 and Zhivko from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/jCIMcOpFHig https://unsplash.com/photos/tHs82PkN5rg
[August 21, 2022] (No 233 articles for the year)
We are noticed when we do this.
*“People should be taught to look up while walking, to smile and talk to people, and not look down all the time.”*
I will surely take the above statement to mean a quote which I extracted from a movie I watched last night. I was touched by it because of the morals it taught me.
The movie was about a young girl whose ambition was to go to Canada to work as a Nurse to clear off the debt her father owed. Her mother was late, and so, the father took up the responsibility to care for her.
She was working as a staff at a chicken hub in a mall. This is a large shopping mall where different kinds of people go and come to buy things and leave. Every day when Helen arrives at the mall, she was always seen smiling and waving at people. She has never frowned her face before and for this reason, everyone loved her and would want to make friends with her.
One day, she was locked inside the cold room where frozen foods were kept. She packed some cartons of chicken inside the cold room and unknown to the owner, he locked the shop and went home. Helen was in the cold room with the AC temperature at 18 degrees.
The father searched everywhere and after five hours, they decided to check around the mall. An old security man told them he has a feeling that she was still inside as he hasn't seen her come out.
After every attempt, they found her almost dead in the cold room and was rushed to the hospital. According to the doctor, a human cannot stand or survive in a temperature of 17 degrees in AC beyond a point, but Helen was locked in there for five hours with 18 degrees temperature.
When the old security man came to check on her, the father was curious and wanted to know why the man insisted that she was inside the mall.
The old man started his story that for 30 years, he has been working as a security at the mall, he has come across hundreds of people going and coming, and no one ever bothered to talk to him or even smile at him, but when Helen started working there, a day never passes by, she would wave and smile at the man and that gave the man hope and courage that there is still someone who notices him.
He said since then, he had never forgotten such a face. According to him, Helen waved and smiled at him in the morning while entering the mall and since he hasn't seen her wave back, he felt she was still there.
This is a movie based on a true event.
We all are busy with our lives and trying to hustle and survive, but it doesn't mean we should just keep staring at the ground while passing different people every day. Smiling at each person a day means a lot, especially to those who feel they are nothing because of their condition.
It still baffles me today to know that people notice me anywhere. I am someone who will always greet every person I come across or pass by, whether it's a known person or a stranger. I believe that humanity starts when we show love to others. Keeping your head down and not smiling at people isn't okay at all. We are always noticed.
For some weeks that I travelled, I didn't step my foot at the mini market around the school area and I didn't know people notice that until one day when I went to get something, different people were greeting me and asked if I travelled because they noticed I didn't pass by. I was touched and I felt the love of humanity.
There was a story I heard about a man who would always order pizza at an eatery every day. For many years, he always orders pizza until one day, he stopped.
The workers and employer taught it was normal, not until it was going to months and they didn't see him order. The boss started searching and when they found out where he was living, they discovered he has been dead inside and nobody knew. They took him out and gave him a proper burial.
If you must know, people notice you, either for your good or bad deed. Be kind to people. Always smile because you never know who needs it at that moment.
The old security man only felt loved the day Helen started noticing and waving at him with smiles on her face and that was what saved her from dying. Don't be too hooked up to your life or work, and not take out seconds to look up and smile at people. It means a lot because it saves them and saves you too.
Thanks for your time.
Image by Andrea from Pexels https://www.pexels.com/photo/back-view-photo-of-smiling-woman-in-checkered-shirt-and-blue-denim-jeans-standing-with-a-bicycle-waving-3752946/
[August 20, 2022] (No 232 articles for the year)
Doing nothing, different thoughts troops in.
*“Where your attention goes, your time goes.”*
Idowu Koyenikan https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/productivity
Have you ever wondered how you keep getting different thoughts in your mind, as negative thinking and doings keeps invading your mind? That is the work of being lazy and not laying your hands on things you ought to do on time. It's so funny how the mind wanders anywhere at that period when you just sit down, doing nothing, and all you keep thinking is acting weirdly or doing irrelevant things.
Many times, I have always been occupied with nonsense things like thinking of death especially, and immediately, I snap out of my thoughts and rebuke such evil thinking in me.
At that moment, because you couldn't lay your hands on something meaningful or productive, you start getting things like going out to steal, rob or involve in illegal activity.
Just like King David in the Bible. He was supposed to be on the battlefield with others in fighting the war, but he chose to relax at home, as he was doing nothing and that was when the devil used that advantage on him as he committed a great sin by looking through a woman who was bathing. Not only that, he lust for her, had sex and even killed the woman's husband.
The truth is, the devil has his mischievous ways of luring you to sin if you aren't occupied with something productive. When you aren't doing anything, at least you will do something and that is when your mind starts to wander anywhere and lead you to do what you aren't supposed to do, and the worst part is having different negative thinking about yourself, thereby losing your self-esteem when all you do is comparing yourself with others.
If truly you have a lot of things to do, you won't even have the time to think about others, or who is criticizing you.
Someone like me, I am not easily oppressed by anything you do because I have many things I do to improve myself, and when I am just too focused on becoming better, I do not see anyone at all. Everyone is striving to thrive better.
**What should you do to avoid this?**
Well, there are things I choose to do to occupy me than being taken away with negative thinking.
**Read books:** Whether it's a hard copy or an eBook, get something and start reading. Through that, you might be inspired on what to do next. You learn new things that would change your thought and take away those bad thoughts. If you are preoccupied reading a book that interests you, you will not even bother about anything around you.
**Write or blog:** Thank God for blogging platforms where you can spend your time on. When you are busy grinding and engaging with others, there wouldn't be space in your mind to allow negative thoughts or see or even brooding over someone who is talking about you.
Get a pen and start journalling things down. Don't give in to irrelevant thoughts at all as this could weigh you down if you dwell too much on them. When you write, you are occupied with inspiring ideas.
**Prepare a nice meal:** If you focus on what to prepare and try to make the best meal for yourself, trust me, you won't even have to think of unnecessary things or even have time.
**Stop procrastinating:** Many times, it's laziness that makes us postpone things. The best way to get occupied is to get up and do things you are supposed to do. Do not leave it till next time. Just engage in something for that day.
**Listen to music:** Have you thought of where music takes you when you listen to songs with thought-provoking lyrics? Yesterday, I tuned in to my Spotify app and I was taken into deep moments singing and rejoicing with beautiful songs, that I didn't even hear when someone was calling my name. I am always taken into another world when I listen to and dance to songs.
**Exercise:** Jogging, Jumping, Squatting etc is another way of sending bad thoughts away from you. It's a way to get busy doing something rather than nothing.
These are just a few of those things one can do not to remain idle or just sit without doing anything because it is that moment the devil delivers work for you. So, be careful.
Thanks for your time.
*Thanks to my sponsors who always renew their sponsorship of me. God bless you always. I am always inspired when I see this and God continue to bless you.*
Image by Bruce Mars from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/nx_l5qUzxUU
[August 19, 2022] (No 231 articles for the year)
Some thoughts to flex my heart.
*“Don't be pushed around by the fears in your mind. Be led by the dreams in your heart.”*
Roy T. Bennett https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/positive-thinking
Several thoughts were just coming to my mind yesterday as I sat down on my white plastic chair, resting my two hands on the blue table in front of me while trying to comment on an article on Hive. I just couldn't focus on reading the post, until I had to do justice to those thoughts by taking my time to give my answers so I won't have to give an unnecessary comment.
Once I finished, I gave a response. I was finishing my task at the Dreemport site for the day.
Some discussions were going on in my school WhatsApp group as to the meeting that was meant to be held on Tuesday at the school, deciding whether to suspend the ongoing strike for 60 days before they would know if the strike should continue on another round.
Sometimes, I just wonder if this government meant well for all students who have been at home for six months or more due to the strike that has been on since February. Though, I did my degree at OAU (a federal university) in affiliation with a College of Education. It saved me because I wouldn't have finished school. It was a few weeks after my final paper that the college of education decided to join the strike too, and not only that, there was a strike over another strike in my school.
The other strike happened because the lecturers and other staff demanded a Vice-chancellor, and not a provost since my school has been changed to a University. Thus, in place of the Adeyemi College of Education, it will henceforth become Adeyemi Federal University of Education. They are just playing with the students' academics and I am also affected too because of my results.
So, the meeting that was scheduled for Tuesday was postponed and this caused some hot arguments among the Student Union Government, thereby pleading for the meeting to take hold and come to a conclusion if the strike should be suspended or not. I became stuck to my phone, staring at the screen and waiting for information from the group conversation to see how it goes.
I'm just worried because, somehow, I'm still a student until I see my results from last semester.
I became the announcer in my compound because they keep asking if there was any announcement, and I kept updating them.
At the end of the day, the meeting was held on Wednesday which was yesterday and the strike was suspended. I informed others and they were excited and began to rejoice. My course representative said that since the school will resume next Monday, we should wait for our results by the end of September. It's too long for me.
There is the possibility that after seeing our results, we still have to wait for the Federal University to resume back to school once the ASUU STRIKE is over as the real campus would determine when we should go for service (NYSC)
They are simply delaying us and they would not allow us to take the next step in our lives in that way.
Now that the school resumes on Monday, hostels would be open on Sunday, so students would return back from their respective locations. Now, the whole area that appears to have been deserted for a long time would be full of students. Everywhere would be lively again.
I am happy for them too because it will allow them to do what is needed in time and move on to the next level and chapter of their lives. Once they resume, it means they would be rushed with tests and exams to cover those missed weeks and return to the normal school calendar.
Also, the electricity decided to embark on a strike which made everywhere went off with light from yesterday morning till now. I read again on the news last night that they cancelled the strike, and we should expect to see the light at any moment today.
I just ranted about my day yesterday and I hope you do not mind me with that. I'm sorry if you find that uninspiring 😉.
Thanks for your time.
Image by Hannah from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/NXiIVnzBwZ8
[August 18, 2022] (No 230 articles for the year)
What are my strengths and weaknesses?
*“Knowing your weakness, is a strength.”*
Dr Toyin Omofoye https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/weakness-and-strength
We are all human beings and we can never have strength in every area likewise, we can never be weak too. Both works for every individual and we must recognize it so quickly so that we could improve or keep low what we wouldn't want people to know about us.
To some, their strength could be in ‘Leadership Skill.’ These set of people are capable of ordering and leading a group of people and would flow well with each person. They know how to deliver and respond to each need of the people and you'd wonder how they could report so effectively.
To some, their weakness could be in the area of not managing resources efficiently. This set of people do not know how to economize, and thereby, keep squandering and wasting resources and finances, even in an organization, and if care isn't taken, they may bring down a company or take it to bankruptcy.
For these kind of people, when they realize this weakness is leading them to ruin or destruction, they seek help immediately and find solutions, so they don't end up becoming objects of ridicule.
**What then are my strengths and weaknesses?**
Of course, I am human, and I do have both in me. I think that makes me a normal human being. Right? 😌
For the strength part, I am always working on it daily so as not to reduce its potency, because that is something I wouldn't want to let off since that is what makes me possess a good habit and attitude.
For the weak part, I can identify them and I am always working on improving myself daily because this could downgrade my personality which I would never allow it happen. I will only be listing two of my strengths and weaknesses.
**For my Strengths**
I have an ***enduring spirit***. Yes, you heard me right! 😉 This is something I am always proud of anywhere I go or find myself, even in the online world. Hardly would you see me giving up on something so easily unless I give my best in it. At least you would know when to give up on something when you realize you aren't going anywhere with it. There are just things you should let go of because they are uncontrollable.
I used to say something; *“you have to let go of something you know you cannot control, else you might just keep circling with nothing to show for it.”*
Since I started my writing journey, it wasn't easy as a newbie then because I thought I would start cashing out immediately. Despite the low earnings I received, there was one mantra I gave myself and till today, I can say it was my endurance that paved way for me, and here I am today, enjoying my harvest.
What is the mantra? *“A little drop of water makes an ocean.”* This is something I used to preach to whoever comes to me to teach them how to make money.
Another strength is that I ***forgive easily.*** Do you know the reason? Perhaps when I mention it, you will have a rethink, if probably you are this kind of person with a stone heart, and wouldn't forgive that person who has hurt you. I do believe that everyone is human and we have flesh in us. It is easy to make mistakes because we aren't perfect.
If God could forgive me every time I commit blunders or make mistakes, who am I not to forgive a fellow who keeps hurting me? This is something I am always proud of. I forgive easily and clear my heart from impurity. Remember, without a forgiving heart, you cannot receive anything from God.
**For My Weaknesses**
I am always afraid of asking for help, especially financially. Hardly would you see me asking you to give me money or even lend me because I feel you might disappoint me. I don't ask for help in such aspect except for my siblings, who I know very well.
Whenever I need money, and I ask my younger sister, she would direct me to one of our Aunts, but I would refuse because I don't want a situation someone will start talking to me anyhow. This is why I stay in my lane and wouldn't talk until I show the sign.
There was a time I needed money, I couldn't ask my siblings at all. I was managing the money with me, but I needed more to settle some things. That day, I got an alert from my Big sis and I was so surprised that I called her and I was like “Sis, you came at the right time when I needed it” and she asked why didn't I ask before now? I told her I couldn't because I thought she also needed to settle herself.
That is me! I believe people are going through different challenges and so, I do not want to add to their burdens but you wouldn't know if you do not try, right? I am so weak in that aspect.
I am always too emotional to the extent that I cry. I made a post about this yesterday on another platform, and how I was able to resolve it, and the technique worked.
I get angry and this leads to me being emotional and would have tears filling up my eyes ready to fall if something or words triggers it. Just don't ask me what is wrong, else you might end up consoling me till I know when to stop. I just can't keep myself from being too emotional when I am hurt or while watching a touching movie.
Someone said for a counsellor like me, I might end up crying with a client if I should listen to his or her story. Yes, I feel for people when I hear their stories. I feel sympathy and at the same time empathy for someone. This is my weakness which I got to manage some days ago.
Thanks for reading
Image by Karolina from Pexels https://www.pexels.com/photo/purple-dumbbells-in-hands-of-positive-sportswoman-4498294/
[August 17, 2022] (No 229 articles for the year)
She almost missed the professional examination.
*“Apology is not about saying I'm sorry, but it is about the meaning you put behind the apology and admitting that you are the wrong part.”*
Unarine Ramaru https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/admitting-faults#:~:text=%E2%80%9CTo%20become%20better%2C%20you%20have,%E2%80%94at%20least%20to%20yourself.%E2%80%9D&text=%E2%80%9CSometimes%2C%20the%20mistake%20is%20not,remorse%20is%20the%20real%20mistake.%E2%80%9D&text=%E2%80%9CI%20accept%20when%20I%20am,that%20only%20makes%20me%20strong.%E2%80%9D
Since I finished my last paper at the University, I have been looking forward to the professional examination that would be done in the school premises. It was a computer-based test and everyone was waiting for the day. We were supposed to have done it some weeks after the final paper, but it was postponed when my school decided to embark on their strike under Colleges of Education.
The day before I travelled, I got a message from the board of TRCN (Teachers Registration Council of Nigeria) that we can now proceed to print out the final slip to get my exam time and date. I quickly placed a call to my friends and informed them that we can now print our slip which would be presented at the examination centre.
This exam is for those wanting to pursue a career in teaching or lecturing in a higher institution and without the certificate, you can't be employed except for private schools.
After talking to my friends, they told me to help them print theirs so I could let them know when they should come to school. They already left the city to hustle while I was still around. I went to print for the three of us and I checked and saw my examination was on Friday which was on the 12th of August while my friends were on the 11th which was on Thursday.
After seeing my time which was 2pm and I checked another one which was the same time, I didn't bother to check the last printout and I concluded that it was the same time for us but the date was different.
One of my friends came around on Wednesday and stayed at my place so she could prepare herself for her exam which was the next day. I was happy seeing her because the last time we saw each other was after our final paper and everyone had gone their separate ways.
We gisted and laughed about so many things and it never occurred to me to give her the printout to keep. My mind was that she would get it the next day since it was just an ordinary printout.
The other friend planned to get here very early since her city is just 2 and half hours to my place. We ate and slept waiting for the next day which was Thursday.
The next morning, we saw those whose exam was at 8am, and we wished them good luck. At least when they come, they would narrate their experience to us so we can get prepared for what is coming to us too.
We continued talking and laughing and she said something that there would still be some students who will miss the 8am exam because some would just be leaving their homes.
All the time we were talking, we never knew my friend was among those who would miss the exam.
I finally decided to give her the printout and when she checked through, she screamed and saw her own time was 8am whereas, I told her it was 2pm. At the time we knew, it was past 10am, which means the first batch had already done the exam and the next batch would be called in.
Immediately she told me her exam was scheduled for 8am, my heart was out of my body. I started shaking because I never expected something like this to happen. Will I be the cause of someone missing her exam? Will she miss this year and come back next year?
First thing first, I switched off the gas as we were cooking for breakfast. Immediately, she was told to start running to the school if she would still find grace.
I put on my clothes, and we left the house. Getting there, she was told since she has missed her batch, she can't do the exam again since the computer has been scheduled for a different time.
At that moment, I couldn't think of anything again and I saw my friend's eyes, turned red. She couldn't speak more that time as she started pressing buttons on her phone to call some people. All I was saying to her was *“It's my fault. I am so sorry please.”* I kept repeating that, so she would know I really meant it and I never knew something like this could happen through me.
I wasn't paying attention to those who were greeting me because I wasn't myself. I was just praying in my mind for God to help me because I admitted the fault was from me. I didn't look through all printouts, as I concluded it was the same time but a different date for us.
After a few minutes of standing under the morning sun, someone signalled to my friend and they were talking. Then, I saw that she was told to sit with some categories of students under a shade. These students were another batch who would be called inside the hall and when I saw that, I was relieved. I knew she would write the exam.
I waited for another one hour, waiting for her to finish as she entered the hall. I quickly checked my other friend and my printout again to be sure as I don't want such a mistake to happen.
This incident happened only by grace because if she wasn't allowed to write the exam, it means the money she paid had been wasted and she would pay another next year which could delay her in some ways. Something we pray to do once and for all and nothing should hinder us at all.
It was until she wrote the exam that I became calm and okay. I felt such a big relief after then. Thank God!
Thanks for your time.
Image by Josh from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/nVeTGyYosKY
[August 16, 2022] (No 228 articles for the year)
I was demanded a $200 ransom.
*“Out of difficulties grow miracles.”*
Jean de La Bruyère https://www.womansday.com/life/a39152674/monday-motivation-quotes/
How would you feel if you got on your phone, and at the other end, you heard something like this;
*“Hey! We just got our hands on your relative called... and we demand a $500 ransom for her release. We need you to make it available within the next couple of days and if you don't comply, she's gone. And again, if you think you're smart, try bringing the police into the picture. That's the last of it. I'll send you the address now.”* Hang up the call.
You will start fidgeting right? At that point, you're confused. All that is in your head and mind is how and where to get such a huge amount of money and also, don't forget, you must be careful not to involve anybody, especially the police.
You're trapped between the Red Sea. You start reminiscing memories about her (the victim). You think of the love between you both. You start imagining her death, and what it would be like if you didn't do something quickly. However, the question should be.
***“How and where can I get that money together in two days?”*** That's funny, isn't it? Or does that sound a little weird? $500?
With the way things went weird and bad, it's sad to always listen to the news of people who were kidnapped and demanded a ransom. And not just a little money, but a huge one, and you are left to wonder if these kidnappers do care about the victims and their families, and to say that they are just too heartless to pull the trigger on them when they do not get the money. Some are even so cruel that they will receive the ransom and still fulfill their wishes by killing their victims.
On many occasions, this kidnapping of a thing could be due to targeting someone who is influential or wealthy, just to go out of their way and raise money from them. It is alarming and apparent to hear about different cases of abduction, while most are for ritualistic reasons.
When I was still with my aunt, I was in my bedroom that afternoon, occupied on my phone when it rang. I saw the caller, and it was my friend. I was wondering why she was calling again at that time because we had already chatted. I breathed as a calm person and I answered the call.
There was a male's voice.
*“Hello! Is that Busayo?”*
I responded with my heart beating fast as though I was being chased by a lion because of the tone of the voice. *“That's right, I am. Who am I on to please?”*
Maintaining his thick voice, he went further
*“Okay, good! We have your friend in custody, and we need your cooperation. We heard you traveled. It's no problem. If you don't want us to hurt your friend, I'll give you an account number now and you need to transfer $200 right away.”*
By that time, my heart had traveled away from my body. I was unable to control myself, but I hung up the call immediately. Various thoughts crossed my mind and I tried to understand the entire scenario of what had just happened.
Why would they contact me? That was my first question, and then there were more questions coming up over and over again.
Why didn't they phone her parents or family? Why me?
Do I want to be scammed here? Was that some kind of joke?
A few minutes later, my phone rang and I was afraid to pick it up because, at that moment, I was more than getting scared and thinking something was about to happen to my friend. I wanted to call one of her parents, but I didn't have their contact. When I decided to take the call, I pressed the green button and I heard laughter.
So this was just a prank? Who dares to play with me? If it was to be a hypertensive patient, trust me, he or she would have collapsed or might have been dead hearing such news, which ended up to be a prank.
The male's voice was my friend's fiance and she came up with such thought to prank me, together with her guy.
I frantically told them that the moment they were demanding $200 from me and I hung up the call on them, I already closed up my mind because no one was ever going to take a pin from me, even if it was real. Why didn't they call her parents first instead of me? Who doesn't need money at this moment? 😂
In all seriousness, I was gone! I didn't know how I came back to myself because that was such an expensive joke. Thank God it was a prank because I don't know what would happen if it were true. I'm scared to death of those kidnappers.
At the moment, a relative of ours was kidnapped and held hostage. He hasn't been released yet, and hopefully nothing will happen. His wife died a few months ago, leaving him with two small children and now it's the dad. What would happen to those children if anything happened? God forbid.
**What would you do if you were pranked with such?**
Thanks for your time.
Image by Freestocks from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/GxM9gkLJbwY
[August 15, 2022] (No 227 articles for the year)
My achievable achievement
*“When the week begins, think of how you will end it. Start your week with joy.”*
Ernest Agyemang Yeboah https://routinelynomadic.com/new-week-quotes/
Is there any word like what I just used as my title? Well, if there isn't, it means I just made up something. An idea that just popped in my head and I picked it up immediately so I wouldn't forget.
It was another great week we just used, and we are already in a new week. There are things I did enjoy achieving last week, and I will be sharing them with you, my fellow readers.
**I stocked up my cupboard with foodstuffs**
God has always proved to be a great provider to me, and it makes me wonder how loving He has been in taking care of me. I never thought myself to always buy in quantities, and not have to buy little from shops around my area.
I go to the market once a month and I get everything all at once. So when I need something urgently to prepare, I won't have to start waiting for shops to open, especially in the morning. I have everything in my cupboard except for pepper which I keep making a new one every three to four days, depending on how large I make it.
When I returned from my travelling on Sunday, I made my budget and went to the market, and this definitely would last me a month before stepping my feet at the market again. Getting to the market, things were so costly.
Those items I was familiar with, just like these in the image, got increased but I don't have a choice. No matter how the economy is right now, we would not starve ourselves, right? The only thing is to keep praying to God for provision.
**I managed my three Blogging platforms**
As some of you know, I am into three platforms; Readcash, Hive and Blurt. Believe me, it is not easy being consistent on these three as it is tasking. One thing I am always happy about is the strength I get to manage them. God has been my strength indeed. I am grateful for what I was able to earn from them and I know that the little I got from these platforms last week would become big later.
**I made a new dish**
Something I always love is to try a new recipe, but most times, I do not have time for it. I would always watch YouTube videos for different meals, and I would end up promising myself of trying it but in the end, I won't attempt it. I was happy I did something last week. I did it for Hive Learners creative Sunday which has been posted on my blog. You can check it out. The name of the meal is Garden Egg Sauce with Yam.
I only ate this meal twice when mom was alive as she was the one who cooked it for us, and that was when I was still in secondary school and I never tasted it again until last week. Such long years!
**I enrolled in two free online courses on Udemy**
I have always planned and determined on becoming a better blogger, writer and even freelancer, but I still want to take courses and become better before signing up on Upwork or another site where I would find a client and make money. I took two courses on freelancing and blogging. I realized there is more to writing and since I learned something new, I have been observing and taking note of articles I read and the ones I write myself.
Part of what I learned is getting to know the four ingredients to writing better, which are; simplicity, clarity, elegance and evocativeness.
**I read books and articles**
Yes, they say if you want to be a better writer, you must read a lot and write a lot. Reading is like charging up your muscle and it keeps your brain fresh and getting to learn new things globally. I don't want to stop learning. Being a graduate shouldn't make me stop reading and learning, especially for someone like me who wants to be smarter and can contribute when people are discussing.
If I never read online, I wouldn't know that Gmail is about to be replaced with another email called Proton Email. You can check it out here
Gmail is dead and something new is replacing it. https://medium.com/illumination/gmail-is-dead-and-something-new-is-replacing-it-bc3623a11fbe
So, I keep reading to enlarge my horizon. I keep reading to contribute to meaningful conversation. I keep reading to know things from my own space here and lastly, I am reading to keep engaging my mind to explore beautiful things.
So far last week, these were what I achieved and looking forward to another awesome week which already started today. I wish everyone a pleasant and glorious week.
Thanks for your time.
Image by Sharon from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/n5oAiYrQ0JY
[August 14, 2022] (No 226 articles for the year)
Come, let's tour this together.
*“Freedom begins where work ends- the realm of freedom is after hours, on the weekend, on vacation, and not at work.”*
Peter Frase https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/weekend
I didn't know when I slept off last night and I guess, it was so early. I had wanted to compile the articles I curated on Blurt, so I could report to the admin when I went to sleep. I woke up at 2 am, and that was when I remembered everything that happened last night. I was watching a movie and I planned to send my report at 10 pm which was the actual time I do that.
I quickly compiled the list of the articles and sent it to him. He already messaged me about it and I had to explain what happened. Sleep wasn't coming after then, and I also remembered that I haven't visited Readcash. I was able to visit 20 articles for two hours, and I slept back at 4:06 am.
I read the @kushyzee challenge post and it was fun. He took us around his phone and I thought of doing that for a weekend like this.
***So, would you mind touring with me as I take you into the world of my phone?***
This is a screenshot of my phone and the apps that are in the shortcut as I don't like scrolling through the whole list of apps to find the actual one I want.
**TOOLS**
The first is the tool app containing a Calculator, Calendar, and Alarm clock. This is what I click on whenever I need to calculate or set my alarm for something important I need to remember. Also, the calendar is for checking some schedules I already added as a reminder for me and some events that are happening in the world, and it makes it easier to know each date for what is happening in Nigeria.
**FREEZER**
This app is used to freeze apps you don't want to keep working in the background, or you want to hide from people. There was a time, I was travelling, and that was when the issue of youths getting rich, making money through gambling or even scamming people. So, they are being checked including their phones to see what they have. I was scared I might be arrested too when they check my phone. I had to freeze some apps like Bitcoin wallet, Binance and Trust wallet and it was until I got to my destination, that I unfreeze them back.
**GALLERY**
This is where all my photos are kept. I have lots of photos in here, and they serve as memories for me, including the ones I screenshot from others' feeds to make use of them later.
**QUORA**
This is an online platform where questions are being asked and you have different people coming to reply and give good answers. No matter what question you are looking for, you will get it here. Sometimes, I get my inspiration for my writing here too.
**DISCORD**
I thought Discord means disagreement? I wonder why this discord app is always in unity with different people all over the world 😂😂
This is a social app that is like WhatsApp but there is a huge difference between both. There are different channels I have joined from Readcash to Hive and then, to Blurt. This is an app where I also post my Hive links, especially in the Hive Learners community where we drop our weekly edition post links for others to support.
**SETTINGS**
This app has different functions you could ever want. Do you want to change some settings on your phone? This is where you navigate to. If you want to increase or reduce the volume of your phone or ringtone, or you need to change to another tune, you can always refer to the settings on your phone.
**ENGLISH DICTIONARY AND ENGLISH THESAURUS**
These are two dictionaries I have on my phone where I look up meanings and synonyms of some words, and it has always been of help in my writing journey.
**MONEY MANAGER**
This is an app that helps track and manage my budget. No matter how much I buy something, I must record it down and at the end of the month, I see how much I have spent. So far, the highest I have spent in a month since I started using this in January this year was over $180 excluding data subscription and I was amazed. I only started tracking my data subscription this month and I would see how much I have spent. Thanks to this app as I know where my money goes.
**WHATSAPP**
Do we all know what this app is used for? Though, I don't always stay active for long because I believe it isn't giving me money. So, I rather spend my time working for money. Lol
Though, I reply to every messages that comes in for me and on some days, I stay much online and that is only when I do not feel like doing anything other than that.
**PEAKD AND DECENCY (CHROME DOWNLOAD)**
I think I don't need to talk about the Chrome browser since it's a common one we all use. I just updated it last week and I love the new update. These two frontends are for Hive. I prefer the ones I downloaded through the Chrome browser as it makes it faster and easier for me. Though, I use Ecency more for engaging and posting while Peakd is used when I need to check my Hive Engine's tokens and track their prices. Also, I use it for converting my Hive and HBD in the market.
**Netflix** (For watching the latest movies)
**Bible** (This is King James Version for my morning devotion)
**Hymn** (This is a Redeemed Hymn book)
**Twitter and Telegram** (We all know their functions. Right?)
**Udemy and Coursera** (The two apps where I take free and not free courses on writing and blogging)
**Ginger writer** (This is a recent app I just started using. It helps your writing become clear and readable. It changes some words for you to suit your taste)
**Dreemport** (This is the chrome version app that makes it easier for me to navigate and do my tasks)
**Make me better** (This includes inspirational quotes and articles on life and other areas)
**Canva** (A graphic design app which you can use to create different designs for your fliers, blogs etc)
**Gomoney** (Instead of saving in my bank account, I use this instead as it doesn't deduct unnecessary charges, and it's a good digital app. There is the savings option with interest.)
Thanks for your time.
Image designed on Canva
[August 13, 2022] (No 225 articles for the year)
How I knew she was plagiarizing
*“If you want to be a writer, you must do two things above all others: read a lot and write a lot.”*
Stephen King
There are so many ways to find inspiration and design your ideas. Want to become a blogger or writer? The truth is that, you have to read and write much, without copying someone's work or idea. This is no originality. I have known the importance of reading and writing whatever that comes to your mind, you could make up the little idea into a full-length written content and you would appreciate yourself for doing that.
**And if I don't want to be stressed?**
Oh! Cut the crap because you're not going anywhere when you don't take the time to get creative about what you're doing. The number one truth, someone would ever tell you as a beginner in the world of blogging is that, you need to bring in your job and not someone's job. This is known as plagiarism.
The word is not new because we have heard it repeatedly on any platform. Plagiarism is about copying someone else's work and doing it without a reference or source. This is likeable to an act of theft. Stealing is an assault on your personality.
We all want to make money, but when you take the wrong way in blogging, you place your account at risk.
There is one thing I am good at, and I am quick to acknowledge. It's the ability to keep an eye on your writing style. I will know if you are the one writing this or if it was copied somewhere, and once I try to play on my curiosity by running a check through the plagiarism detector, my instinct does not deceive me, except I haven't known you before.
This friend thought it was easy to simply copy and paste online without anyone finding out. I boarded her on Blurt last month because she wanted a place that's not difficult or stressful. I knew her and her enduring abilities, I gave her blurt, to begin with, because I know she might start to accumulate Blurt tokens since the Blockchain is still an early project.
She signed up and posted very well until one day, I clicked on a new post of hers, going through it, I knew it wasn't her writing. I am not saying that she could not write a good phrase, but I have already observed her previous writings.
I decided to play around with her post through a check and found out it was 95% plagiarism. I did the same for another post, and it was the same. This means she plagiarized twice, which is against the blockchain as plagiarism is shunned.
I screenshot my proofs to her and chatted her up. She denied at first that it was her work. I smiled and had to explain to her. She had to give up when she knew she was defending a really obvious thing.
She apologized and said, “I had no idea they were going to detect. Writing every day is a challenge to me.”
**Was that why you chose to plagiarize?** I made her know I could have reported her if not that she is my friend, and I know it's her first time writing on any platform. I made her realize that the system would detect you are plagiarizing, and you could lose your account, including your earnings.
Writing doesn't come easy! This I can accept, but it becomes easy when you decide to concentrate and devote your time to it. Though, there are times you would experience writer's block due to laziness, lack of energy, etc., I can guarantee that you can write an experience of your day, how you ended up making that meal or finding time to have a bath after a long hissing, murmuring on the bed, and complaints about life. There are things to write about.
Don't try to steal other people's artwork because you wouldn't be happy if someone stole your creativity. How does it feel to step into their shoes? How would you feel about someone like that stealing your stuff? Something you took the time to make it suitable for people to read, and someone, somehow, decided to highlight all the words and copy them to their blog. I think you'd be angry. Learn to put yourself in other people's place when thinking about plagiarism.
Thanks for reading
Image by Andrea from Pexels and edited on Canva https://www.pexels.com/photo/writer-working-on-typewriter-in-office-3808904/
[August 12, 2022] (No 224 articles for the year)
I don't think I would do this.
*“When the going gets tough, put one foot in front of the other and just keep going. Don’t give up.”*
Roy T. Bennett https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/never-give-up
I read from someone yesterday, how a state in the North is paying teachers #6000 per month. I mean $9.2 if it is calculated in #650 per dollar in our currency. That's so cruel and heartbreaking to hear. What would that amount cover? For a teacher who has a family and children going to school, what will that help them with for a whole month before expecting another one?
Sincerely, teachers aren't compensated well, and even if the reward of a teacher is in heaven, why can't they start enjoying it on earth first? I pity those in this condition, but that is how the system has made it to be. Why wouldn't teachers earn hugely? They are doing a big job here.
They wake up as early as possible to be in school and are always available for these children, and at the end of the day, they are given such an amount of money. Something that wouldn't last two days or so. Why is this so?
My friend arrived at my place yesterday as we are to write a professional examination this week. She started saying some things I just wouldn't want to involve in at all even if I would still go in that line.
According to her, there is a state in the Western part that pays teachers hugely but the disadvantage is that, you resume by 6 am if you are on duty, and go back home once all children have left. She said a teacher on duty had gone home at 10 pm in that school, just because a parent failed to pick up her child, not until that time. What work is the parent doing that she couldn't plan on who to come for the child except her?
But for other staff, you are to leave the school premises at 7 pm. For what? How much am I being paid that you have to tie me down in school? Don't I have other things to attend to? Don't I have a family to cater for too? Leaving home as early as 6 am and returning to my home at 7 pm. What guarantees that I would even be able to do any other work, especially being a content creator for different platforms?
She is working in a private school that has CCTV installed everywhere in the school environment. Starting from the school gate to each classroom. The only place where the camera isn't installed is in the toilet. She said the owner of the school is in the overseas and so, she monitors everything that goes on through the camera and no one would be able to do any other thing.
A teacher was suspended for three days because she was caught on camera pressing her phone. That is absurd. She was even doing that during break time. Isn't that justified for her?
I asked how much the school pays each staff and she said #30k ($46). This is why I don't want to work in a private school because of all these conditions. I won't be able to breathe just because I am at work. What if I have an emergency call, I won't be able to pick up just because there is a camera being installed everywhere. This is why I would even choose to work from home where I will be my own boss, and do what I like, and no one to judge or suspend me.
Once I need to go for an interview at a private school, I must listen to the rules before concluding to work with them because I wouldn't want to inconvenience myself, or not have time for other things just because I am being paid a certain amount I would end up feeling bad about at the end of the month.
The truth is, some private school pays handsomely, but you will work more than what you are paid. What then is the use of the money when you will still buy drugs to treat yourself?
I pity teachers who are faced with this dilemma. They truly deserve better and it doesn't mean they should work and exhaust their energy.
I don't think I would want to do those jobs stated above at all, no matter how much they pay. I won't even have time for my digital skills at all because, by the time I get back home, I would be tired and still would be preparing to wake up early the next day. That life, I don't want it. Lol
Thanks for reading
Image by Thomas from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/qnFFfsrxzIk
[August 11, 2022] (No 223 articles for the year)
Let's stop self-sabotaging ourselves
*“Resistance by definition is self-sabotage.”*
Steven Pressfield https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/self-sabotage#:~:text=%E2%80%9CIf%20you%20think%20of%20something,do%20this%2C%20or%20that.%E2%80%9D&text=%E2%80%9CDoes%20it%20make%20sense%20to%20boycott%20ourselves%3F
Everyone wants to climb the ladder of success, unfortunately, we would be confronted with challenges and obstacles that would slow things down for us. Who wouldn't want a free life where everyone could just stretch their hands and get through their goals? The truth is, we all do.
Many of us have found ourselves in self-sabotaging, and this definitely could hamper our progress and create fear in our minds, before we know what is happening, we are scared of trying because we feel we are inadequate.
Self-sabotaging is driven by negative self-talk when we think we aren't sufficient or do not have the ability like others. We keep getting scared of trying because we've already concluded that we would fail while trying, so of what use should I try?
I know many of us, including myself, have found ourselves looking at others and how they are doing well, and because we compare ourselves to them, we focus on what they are doing, rather than what we can offer. No one will know what we are capable of doing if we do not showcase our potential.
Just because you feel like *“I can't do it, it's beyond my power and strength, she is doing better than me etc”*, we bring ourselves so low and stop trying.
**When you sabotage your effort and project, you might be getting in your way.**
Another way you sabotage yourself is when you put yourself down. Surely, we would always meet with criticism and judgement from people because no matter what we do, they aren't good or pleasing in some people's eyes. They stab you with negativities, and seeing or hearing that, you add to your problem by believing what they say about you. Allow yourself to recognize what your abilities are, and bring out the skill hidden in you because the world will not know what you can do until you show them.
When people sabotage themselves, they hinder their success and when they take these destructive steps, it would thwart their lives and relationships with other people.
*Though, many times, we may consciously or unconsciously self-sabotage ourselves. How does this happen?*
A conscious sabotaging is when you are overweight and you have the intention to reduce your weight, but you are still eating a whole carton of cake and ice cream because you concluded, you can't achieve your aim.
Unconscious sabotage is when you unintentionally fail to meet the deadline of a project due to some circumstances, and instead of trying to submit it, you are afraid you might lose.
There are things we can do, if we do not give it a try, we might be missing out on some huge opportunities because if you fail to try, you may never try anything at all, and that is one of the obstacles to getting higher in life.
We all are different and have our purposes in life. We can't be the same as other people and that is why we are unique. Recognize your capability and work on your skills. There is nothing bad in taking risks in life. You might not know what will work out best if you do not give it a try.
Stop speaking negative words to yourself. This means you are limiting yourself and you will always be confined to your comfort zone when you should have gotten up and given it a try.
When you wake up each day, look into the mirror and feel the same person you are. Say positive things to yourself and believe you can do it. This life is all about giving it a try and knowing what we are good at. Let's prove to the world what we can do and stop sabotaging ourselves as you are only pulling yourself down instead of pushing yourself up and higher.
Thanks for reading
Image by Toa from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/XIAJd448FnY
[August 10, 2022] (No 222 articles for the year)
How I stopped being emotional
*“Your emotions are the slaves to your thoughts, and you are the slave to your emotions.”*
Elizabeth Gilber https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/emotions
We have different types of emotion, among them is anger. Everyone is prone to getting angry over something, they are just on levels. There are some, whose anger could destroy things. There are some, whose anger could make them not forgive forever, and there are some, whose anger could make them feel emotional and tears would start dropping from their eyes.
Among all of these, I am in the last category and it's been long I have been wanting to control myself when I feel angered. Though, when I am angry, I quickly end it so it doesn't turn into hatred for me or make me start to judge people, and think of the bad sides of them than the good side. If you would notice, that when you are angry with a person, you will begin to think negatively about him or her, and think of the bad sides rather than the good side of them.
I have been emotional right from childhood and whenever something hurt or angers me, I would start crying, and to make it worse, if you ask me about it, the tears would start first even before I utter a word. I know this isn't good for me especially when I am now grown up.
When I watch movies that are so emotional, I would cry and imagine the movie is real. Whereas, those who made the movie already finished and left, and I am the one stressing myself over a fictional movie.
Something happened to me last Saturday and this same emotion happened, but I instantly found a solution to it, and it might help you too if you feel the same way as me.
Trust me, these techniques would work for everyone if you are ready, because to me, I feel, being too emotional shouldn't be necessary at some point else, people might take you for a weak fellow.
A friend called and asked when I would be returning which I told her, on Sunday. She saw it as an opportunity to help her get something from her Uncle who lives in the state. She pleaded with me to help her bring it along. I asked her if the stuff isn't heavy or much. I won't be able to help her because I was considering my luggage too.
She said it's just a small stuff and I agreed to help her since she stays in the same compound with me. She gave my contact to her Uncle and we communicated where I would come to collect the stuff from him.
To cut the long story short, I took a bike to the place, a far city in the state. When I arrived there, I saw the stuff was so heavy and I couldn't turn back again, but I collected it, and to make the matter worse, this man couldn't give me transport fare back. I thought my friend already discussed things with him because she can't expect me to pay for what belonged to her.
As the bike man turned back, I started thinking different things in my mind. I became angered. Not because the man didn't give me the money, but the fact that my friend said the stuff isn't a heavy one. How does she expect me to carry this with my luggage? This, and different questions were in my mind as the bike man kept moving.
At that point, I knew if someone should ask me what was wrong, I will cry. The tears were already planning to drop from my eyes because the thought of how to carry everything in my journey was all over me. I was sad, angered, pissed off and frustrated. These were the emotions all over my face.
When I got home, my Aunt saw me and asked what was wrong. I wanted to speak out, but the tears that were already swelled on my face dropped down and I went inside.
I wanted to call my friend, but I knew my state of mind then. I might end up transferring all my aggression to her. I chatted her but wasn't online. I expressed myself through the chat and made her know I was so hurt and I never expected that.
I went to sleep and placed my phone in “Do not disturb” mode as I do not need any distraction, as I might say what I do not want to say.
This technique helped me stop my anger and calmed me down, because when I woke up, It was as if nothing happened. I saw missed calls and it was from my friend. I knew she had read the message I sent on WhatsApp. When I called her back, I only calmly expressed myself and didn't end in misunderstanding, but we laughed over it and that was the end.
***Do you understand what happened in this scenario?***
Yes, I was angry, I felt emotional about the whole issue, and for me not to take a wrong decision, for me not to keep thinking about the bad side of my friend, and for me not to transfer my aggression to others or say what I ought not to say, I had to sleep and calmed myself down as this helped me return to my normal state when I woke up.
I addressed the situation in a relief way as it also helped me too not to disgrace myself when talking to her. This is through allowing myself quiet time by sleeping.
There are other ways you can manage your emotions other than this, and they are;
Walk away from the situation
Decide if the person deliberately hurt you
Refrain from taking any decisions at that moment
Relax your facial expression
You have to breathe before responding.
I hope with this, you will be able to confront and manage your emotions anytime.
Thanks for reading.
Image by Elyas from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/jWaZIEW7z7g
[August 09, 2022] (No 221 articles for the year)
Another awesome trip.
*“Love everyone, but don’t give your heart to just anyone. Your heart is not a gift, it is the prize.”*
Dr Toyin Omofoye https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/guard-your-heart
Sometimes, I just look at the name of this community and I smile because of how it is named **“Flex your heart”.** Flex means to flaunt one's superiority and I think that is the purpose of this community. We all are superiors and there is something each day that makes us happy and want to flaunt and tell others how we did it.
There are things we learn, exhibit and exercise each day of our lives and we feel we are superior. Yes, whatever new thing we learn, do or actions we take that make us improve ourselves, makes us superior and we can't wait to show it here through blogging, so others would know what is going on with us.
That is another way to see what others have been able to achieve for the day. Now, I just break the meaning of the community's name to you so you can get a glimpse of what it is all about. @Talecharm made the right choice too.
I used 11 days at my Aunt's new apartment and I must say, I enjoyed the moment especially with the electricity, even though I wasn't able to concentrate much on my blogging. At least I still did something. My brother and I had shown our good attitudes to heed our Aunt when she beckoned on us to come over so it won't be her alone in the house. No matter how long you stay at a place that isn't yours, one day, you will leave. No matter how long you stay with your parents, when you grow up someday, you will leave to find your purpose.
At least, I left my parent's house for my freedom when I gained admission into a college of Education just as I said in my previous post. Till now, I am alone, independent and free. This means that every decision I make goes back to me and the result would be shown later. I arrived at my place yesterday and the journey, even though was long, the most important thing was appreciating God for a safe trip.
The journey was kind of rough because I wished I could have seen a direct or straight bus or car which could lessen the amount and the hours spent for me. I got to the park at 8:30 am but unfortunately, I was told the only direct bus to my destination just left. I had to take a cab to another garage I was directed to, but getting there, there was no bus to my location. I felt sad and thought I should go back home. I already left home, why would I turn back? I will just keep moving till I get to my destination.
I had no choice but to take a car to a particular place and from there, would take another car to the exact place I was going. Apart from having your car, it's better to get a straight car or bus to take you where you are going especially when you have lots of bags with you. I carried heavy bags and it made me frustrated not to see just a direct car or bus.
I was sitting with a lady in the first roll while there were two others at the back. I still enjoy taking a car than a bus when travelling because it is safer and easier than the bus, even though it is pricey. Yes, taking a car is more expensive than a bus. A car could only contain 8 passengers including those sitting at the front beside the driver but a bus contains 18 passengers, including those at the front. So, the car is pricey to cover up the amount a bus would also take.
The man who was the driver was kind, he was patient with us. The journey was a smooth ride. It got to a point, I was pressed and needed to release the urine in my system, I told the driver to park at a place so I could do it. It isn't easy for a lady putting on trousers to want to pee by the roadside but the man knew I wore a trouser and he had to find a convenient place in a bush for me to pee. I had to beg other people inside the car because they can be funny at times. That is when you will hear different murmurs from them and would always be in a haste to get to where they were going.
As we continued the journey, every ten minutes, we would be stopped by police officers and soldiers just to collect bribes. I wonder how much these drivers make daily when they would have given half of their money to these officers. Instead of doing their duties by checking the cars and buses, and asking for their papers and documents, they are only focused on receiving bribes. Such a shame for them.
We got to a particular point where some soldiers stopped us, they already passed us and immediately one of them stopped us after sighting a Muslim guy sitting beside the driver, he was pressing his phone. The soldier asked why he would be pressing his phone at the point. He quickly said he was reading his Quran and with that, he added “I am sorry”. Who wouldn't fear a soldier? 😂😂
The soldier said he would let him go because he was reading a religious book and he warned him that he shouldn't try that next time. When you are being stopped by soldiers or police officers, you must not press your phone even if you are on call at that moment, you have to disconnect until you have passed them. I just smiled in my mind and we went our way.
A journey that should have lasted me 3-4 hours with a direct bus ended with 7 hours. So tiring, but I bless God for taking me home safely. I got home and arranged my room, swept the floor and did other chores. I only prepared Indomie and Egg and that was what I ate all through yesterday. One thing about me is that I don't eat when travelling until I get to where I am going. Not for any reason but that's my principle.
By the time I finished up everything and took my bath, I was already tired. I only managed to tip five articles here and wrote a post on Hive so I won't miss a day posting there too.
Above all, it has been God all the way and it's another week to keep grinding and achieving your daily targets.
Thanks for reading
All images are mine.
[August 08, 2022] (No 220 articles for the year)
I craved for my freedom
*“Freedom lies in being bold.”*
Robert Frost https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/freedom
**Who doesn't want freedom? The truth is that we all do, because we want to do things on our own and not be monitored or checked and this is because we also want to feel responsible and see ourselves as someone capable of doing things on their own.**
I have in many ways craved freedom while growing up. I see many adults living on their own and doing things the way they want with no one to keep a tab on them, even their parents weren't around and this made them do whatever they want. Going out and returning when they feel like, buying whatever they like, and even having boyfriends and girlfriends. These are what I see that made me want to leave home quickly.
When I see some girls living alone and cooking different meals, especially when there are groups of ladies in the room, chatting and laughing, I wished I could also be alone. I wish I could also cook the food I want and eat. I wish I could also have a boyfriend we would sit outside together and gist. These were stuff I see around me and they increased my longing for freedom. I wanted it badly then.
I came from a family that would never want to see you around boys. Yes, my parents were so cringed at our lifestyle and would always want to know what is going on. Once they hear us talking to a guy, especially my mom, she would find ways to call us inside and that is the end for that day.
This made my hunger for freedom get higher and I just couldn't wait to be away from home. A place where my parents wouldn't scream at me when they see me talking to boys. A place where they wouldn't scold me for buying things for myself and so on.
*But reality dawned on me when I left home, away from my parents and I knew what I didn't value then.*
It was when I got admission into the college of education in the year 2012. That was the starting point of my freedom as I was so excited that I was free from my mom's nagging and constant checking of my life. I felt on top of the world when I arrived at my hostel and started living my life with no one to check on me.
The next morning when I woke up, that was when I knew what I was in for. I was alone to wake myself up and not my parents. I was alone making my food instead of my mom. No one to advise me as I took decisions for myself.
I started choosing what is best and wrong for me as I was conscious of everything around me. I got to be responsible for whatever I go through. I became my own parent in another land. I was afraid to step into a relationship because I was just scared, especially getting to know that once you make any mistake, you are on your own.
Though, I got to learn from experiences. I learned how to take responsibility and learned how to choose the best decision for my life. I wasn't with my parents who would caution me but I was alone and would always be mindful of what I eat, what I wear and the kind of friendship I involve with.
Though, there are good sides to being away from home and gaining your freedom and there are disadvantages too. I learned to fight for myself and take all blame for whatever actions I take.
It wasn't easy at first because I have been used to staying with my family but after being away from them, I knew I should have valued them more instead of looking at others and wanting a life like them.
There is time for everything and while you are with your family, you should appreciate and value them in your life because when you are alone and have been granted the freedom you wanted, it won't be easy as you have thought.
Thanks for reading
Images by Anna and Gabriel from Pexels https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-wearing-face-mask-at-airport-3943883/ https://www.pexels.com/photo/happy-woman-relaxing-on-sofa-4338506/
[August 07, 2022] (No 219 articles for the year)
A concerned lifestyle.
*“Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are.”*
John Wooden https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/john_wooden_163015?src=t_concerned
This is not my way of bragging or sugar-coating my lifestyle. I am very simple and feel concerned about others. I am not selfish or act as if I don't care but taking me for granted is what I wouldn't accept or tolerate. I love to show sympathy and at the same time, empathy because I feel we all are entitled to living a good and best life.
There is something about me with people, and it is that I care to the extreme level and that is what makes me unique. Yes, I am so unique and my lifestyle is nothing but good.
I was inspired to write about this experience of mine after reading the post by @Olasquare titled “Complaint and Compliment.” https://read.cash/@Olasquare/complaint-and-compliment-92b47762
He talked about a friend who lived with them for some months and never contributed anything to the house and he felt comfortable eating their food. That is a bad behaviour if I must say because these people showed great concern to live with them without collecting house rent from you and you do not feel shy not to at least support them with money to get some things you know would benefit you too.
This is not me. I am always shy of staying in someone's place and not trying my best to support them in my little way. I don't feel comfortable in someone's house even if I am staying for a few days and not doing anything.
Even staying with my aunt, I know how much I have spent to support her. She isn't my mother and so, being with her, to me, it's like an inconvenience even though she asked me to come. I don't feel too good not contributing when she is feeding me and my brother. I have it and so, I should support her too because I know it isn't easy with her.
The last teaching practice I did was in another state and city (my friend's family's house precisely). The three of us all agreed to go to the same place and one of us allowed us to stay at her family's house.
There was her grandma and Aunt living there and so, the two of us stayed there while my friend who gave us the home stayed in her parent's house that wasn't far from there.
I wasn't comfortable with that as they kept cooking and feeding us with their money. The first support I did was subscribing to their GOTV for them when it got expired. I also filled the gas for them. At least I was trying to support in my way for them while the other friend wasn't doing anything. I don't know how someone would feel so comfortable with that. Though, I understand she doesn't have enough but trying something would do a lot.
We stayed there for six weeks and I knew what I did. There was a time we went to school and while returning home, I branched into an eatery and bought food and drinks for everyone including my friend who hosted us.
The other friend wasn't around and when she returned the next week, she could have just bought bread along to give them but she didn't.
I did my best as I saw it as my way of helping and appreciating them for hosting us for such weeks. I enjoyed my stay there while they enjoyed us too.
You wouldn't bring me to your home to stay for a few weeks and I wouldn't do anything. Even giving me food for a day would be uncomfortable for me to eat because my conscience would keep telling me to do what is right and I wouldn't rest until I do something to show my gratitude.
Yes, you don't owe anyone but it is your responsibility to support especially when you are staying at someone's place. They could have disallowed you from living with them and there's nothing you can do about it. It is very bad sleeping, eating in a place not meant for you and no iota of support from you. They wouldn't ask you because they believe you should know what is right to do.
Thanks for reading
Image by Priscilla from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/zXzcbvyPa00
[August 06, 2022] (No 218 articles for the year)
A weekend of fun with me alone.
*“You don't have to own the whole world to enjoy yourself. All you need is to use the little on you to enjoy life, whether it's not up to what you'd expected. At least having something is better than nothing.”*
Princessbusayo
*(I hope you can read that statement again to understand my point)*
One thing my sister would always hammer into my ears is to enjoy life because it doesn't have duplicates. Yes, I fully embrace this particular statement clearly because there is nothing we would take back when leaving this world. You have to live your life to the fullest. Even if you don't have much with you, at all, at all, na im bad. This is a pidgin language which means having a little is better than having none.
One thing about me is that I love eating good food, no matter how expensive it is. Food is life and you should spend what you have and forget about that challenge because if you truly believe, God will make a way for you.
Nevertheless, don't be lazy. Do not think manna would fall from heaven because we aren't in the era of the Israelites.
I got a gift of $20 to enjoy my weekend and I should spend it alone. What am I going to do with the money? A lot! I have my plans made down for the weekend and the first thing is to convert to my country's currency, and after doing that through P2P on Binance at the rate of #650 per dollar, I got 13000 naira. That's a lot of money for me to spend on weekend all by myself.
One of my favourites food is Poundo Yam. I should have chosen Rice for this weekend but I have been eating it and I am already tired. So, let me go for swallow and instead of stressing myself pounding yam when I got no strength, life is being made easy with Yam flour. All you have to do is to boil some water and get it done within 5-8mins maximum.
Sisi Jemima's page on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/p/Bx2uqWSAQpa/
I love taking my swallows with Vegetable soup and not ordinary vegetables but with seven lives (in Yoruba, we call it “elemi meje”)
*(Let's see if mine would complete elemi meje) 😂😂*
The ingredients would consist of vegetables, Locust Beans, Palm oil, Maggi and Salt, Roasted fish (Eja Yiyan), Chicken/Turkey/Meat, Stockfish, Crayfish, Ponmo (Cow's skin) and Poundo Yam. All these would cost me #3750 and I would still be having #9250 change left. I would get a Malt drink with the #250 on top of the #9000 to go with the meal after which I would sleep and have my peace of mind.
Mind you, my vegetable is still left in the pot and I might just decide to cook some rice later in the day because I love it when I just cooked a fresh vegetable soup with those sweet little angels roaming in the soup and eating with Rice. Have you tried eating both combos? 😋😋
The next day, the weekend continues. I would visit a beach for the first time in my life. There was a time I enquired about a beach in Ondo state and someone directed me to this particular one.
Picture of Araromi beach in Ondo, taken from nairaland https://www.nairaland.com/6400890/beautiful-pictures-araromi-beach-ondo
I and my three friends planned going but after listening to the bills, it amounted to #20,000 for the four of us. This means, that if I have to go alone this time, I should be spending #5000 (to and fro) which is still a good one.
Going to the beach for the first time would be a forever memory in my mind because that would be my first time stepping my foot in such a place. I need to be alone and have the best moment with nature and see how cool the sea is.
By the time I get home, I should be having #1000-2000 as change left because I would get something at the beach to keep my company and enjoy myself.
That means the remaining money would be kept in my pocket till another time. With this $20, I hope I would satisfy myself to the rim and get excited about visiting the beach which would fascinate me.
Thanks for reading
*First image by* *Karolina* *from Pexels* https://www.pexels.com/photo/gift-envelope-with-heap-of-greenbacks-on-marble-table-4386180/
[August 05, 2022] (No 217 articles for the year)
Fake Accolades.
*“I've never been much for the accolades and for the trophies and for the merits because at one time in my life I kind of got bored of all those.”*
Tony Ferguson https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/tony_ferguson_1063320?src=t_accolades
*Andrew won a jackpot of 10 million naira and it was as if his dream had just come to pass. He had wanted to get a Mercedes Benz of his own. Of all the beautiful cars he had seen, the Benz desired him and when he cashed out the money, the first thing he did was to go and purchase the car through a friend who accompanied him there.*
*Ever since he had won the money, he stopped going home to his parents as he was always visiting different clubs and events with his friends. They were always hailing and praising him and this got into him and would make him keep spending for everyone around him.*
*His only thought was how to make girls fall in love with him and would squander a large portion every day with them and he never stopped doing that until one day when he became sick. He got sick to the extent that he spent the rest of the money paying bills upon bills.*
*At this moment, no friend came around, only his family he left alone. No one seems to care about his health except for his caring mother who would sit beside him on the hospital bed, praying for him to get well.*
*After some weeks, he was discharged and then, he had nothing again as he had spent everything. It dawned on him the kind of people he had. Those who kept praising him were only after his money and now, he has nothing and the only people who he thought wouldn't come around were his family. He regretted never saving or investing.*
Accolade is when you praise someone for his achievement or when they are successful. It is difficult to know those who give fake accolades until the reality is shown especially when you have nothing again. That is when you will be opened to know those who care from those who are after your wealth and success.
In my tribe, they say *“owo epo ni aiye bani la”* this means that when your hand is filled with money or sweet things, they will come around to spend with you, praising and hailing your name, but once your hands become dry, they will leave and forget you ever existed.
Only a few would return that moment you have given and helped them.
Fake accolades are everywhere and if you aren't wise to know where to divert your wealth to, instead of lavishing and squandering unnecessarily, you will be brought back to your old life and there wouldn't be anyone to help you.
I have in many ways experienced this situation and I would just nod my head at how people are. They are only after what they would benefit from you and once it is gone, they leave.
There was a man in a movie I watched. He was involved in money rituals and he used his daughter in exchange for money but he would lock her up. After raping and making her pregnant, he would call on his personal doctor to come and abort the pregnancy.
All the while, the doctor kept obeying his orders because of what he was receiving from him. He kept quiet until nemesis caught up on the man and he stopped giving the doctor money. The doctor threatened to expose his secret to the world. Though, he was killed because of that.
Once they are getting something from you, your secret is safe and they keep giving fake accolades until you stop giving them. That is when you will see the other side of people, threatening to expose you and ruin your image. They will forget those good moments with you but focus on the bad sides and the turned out of things.
The only way to avoid these sets of people so they don't end up ignoring and stop picking your calls is to do what is right and be wise not to spend extravagantly or live a flamboyant life without the thought of the future.
Some enjoy being praised because they want to oppress others for it. This kind of people may never be wise to give a thought to what would happen later because all their minds are to oppress others. Their end would open their eyes when they see people who they have helped avoiding them.
Though your success and achievement would attract a lot of people to you but always remember that not everyone who praises and hails you are sincere with it. Not everyone would be happy with your success and achievement. Some would have bad thoughts toward you even though they are among everyone who gives you accolades. Know what you are doing and don't live a reckless life. Spend within your limit and always remember that the future is ahead of us and we don't know what it holds.
The future is pregnant and we don't know yet what it would give birth to.
Thanks for reading
Images by Skylake and John from pixabay https://unsplash.com/photos/yDSe7sggb9Q https://unsplash.com/photos/_qADvinJi20
[August 04, 2022] (No 216 articles for the year)
I bribed him to wait.
My brother and I have been in Ilorin for some days now, and we are loving the environment even though we do not have any friends yet. All tenants are glued to their apartments and no one comes out. We only see to greet when we set out eyes on each other. Maybe when I stroll out in the morning and someone is about to go out, we just greet each other and that was it.
Staying with my Aunt, you just have to dance to her tune. Even though she isn't doing her dry-cleaning work again, she doesn't stop looking for some work in the house to do and she would have to carry us along. KP already told me not to complain but I am doing that now 😂😂
Every second, she will just scream your name and it's as if she doesn't want to see you sitting and relaxing. The only time we are free from her is at night when everyone would have eaten and that is the only time I have more time than during the day.
At least we were pampered with light since I arrived last Tuesday to Saturday morning. I was even begging them to take the light away because we couldn't stop charging and seeing the light on but the worst happened when they took it off later in the evening and we thought they would bring it back the next day which was Sunday, the 31st of July.
We didn't go to Church because Aunt would have to search around for a church she would start worshipping from. We had to stay at home but at that moment, my power banks were already going dead. I became frustrated and unhappy because I don't like seeing my phone going off especially with my engagement online.
I started using my phone bit by bit so the battery would last me all through the day. Thank God I already prepared some articles to be posted on Hive and Readcash for Monday as I gave up after not seeing the light coming forth and the day was already going.
My brother had made up his mind to leave yesterday already as my plea wasn't going anywhere. With my aunt's condition in finding the remaining balance for her house rent, I bribed my brother with $10 to wait till Saturday so that I would be leaving on Sunday too. Actually, I don't want him to collect any money from her when leaving because we know what is going through at the moment.
If he had left on Tuesday, it would be only two of us in the house and my brother's presence has been lively to me and if he goes, it would be boring because I don't talk to my Aunt like that. There is a reason though and I don't want any problem.
Thank God, he agreed to stay. Not because of the money I offered him because according to him, he is a big boy and doesn't need my money. I told him to think about it... Free money from his big sis 😅😅
The light that went off since Saturday came back later on Monday afternoon when we have given up and I thought I would miss posting my articles and staying offline till when the electricity is restored. You need to come and see my mood when I saw my phone going dead. My life has been wired on my phone and been addicted to it has caused something.
With this, there was no water in the house as the storex was emptied already. I dropped down fuel money to put in the Gen because I was already losing it all and different thoughts kept coming. Perhaps I should lie that I needed to go back to my place the next day.
My brother went in search of fuel for the Generator but he came back after thirty minutes saying he wasn't getting the place. I wouldn't blame him though because we're new and haven't known everywhere around the area and besides, where my aunt relocated to is very far from the main road and it's always a lucky thing if you can get a bike to take you.
Thank God, the light is stable now but I already made up my mind to leave soon because I am not enjoying my stay there.
It would be my Aunt alone in the house when I and my brother leave and that is life for you.
We can never be together forever... Everyone would find his or her way while you continue to live your life.
This is just an update about my stay at my Aunt's house. Right now, I need to go start doing something and I just hope I have the time today because she will eventually lay her hands on different things today. That woman doesn't rest at all 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Thanks for reading
All images are mine
[August 03, 2022] (No 215 articles for the year)
Love and money are two different things.
*“A real woman is not impressed by money because she knows her love is priceless.”*
Unknown
I love the above quote and it reminds me of when my mom would always make us understand that when we have our own money and work hard, no guy would oppress us with their money. When you are a real woman who knows her worth. When you work hard for your money, the only thing you would want is true love because even the guy will not be able to buy your love with his money.
Good morning everyone! The above write-up was just included this morning as I had to add some things I remembered when I was growing up. Yesterday was Bch 5th anniversary and I remembered when I celebrated the fourth anniversary last year. I am glad to be part of the community this day. I have been blessed through Bitcoin Cash and I am grateful for the opportunity being placed down by the people behind this wonderful platform.
*So, let's continue the article for today.....*
Love and money are two different things. While the former might be eternal, the latter could be temporary happiness. According to psychology, money might not be able to buy love but it can increase the chance of love.
*Take for example; As a guy, who takes a girl out shopping, buys her everything she wants and takes her everywhere by spending a lot of money on her. Trust me, you would win her love for you till your money last. Once your money finishes or you just pretend you don't have it again, then you will know if truly she loves you for who you are or just for your money.*
The truth is that money can buy many things you desire, you can travel to your favourite place in the world, but for love, it is impossible except you want to deceive yourself because if you think you can buy love with money, there would be a time you will regret such a step.
There was a clip I watched sometimes back. The lady asked the guy for a reason he loved her. The guy said he has no reason because if there is a reason to love her, one day he would wake up not loving her because the reason is gone.
There shouldn't be a reason to love another person but to love unconditionally. Loving without finding the “why” in such emotion. Love is an emotion and should be done freely and not with something attached to it.
As a lady, when you love a guy because he has money and you think he would spend his money on you. What if he is this stingy guy? What will you do?
Money only brings happiness for a while and it would be as if you love him since there is money. A day would come, there wouldn't be money. Will you still stand by him? Will you still be there to defend him?
If you think money can buy your love, then it means you do not worth the value in you. It means you are cheap and any guy can just walk up to you and lavish you with his money and boom, you surrender yourself to him and once he had his way, that is the end.
No amount of money can buy my love for a guy. Money isn't enough when it comes to loving someone dearly. The relationship isn't all about money but genuine love.
A love that can never be bought with anything but your sincerity and loyalty. I don't want your money, but your commitment and honesty to love me for who I am.
There are many girls out there that have sold themselves cheaply to a guy and in the end, they are used for ritual and that is the end. All because you want to follow a rich guy but you don't know their behaviours and attitudes.
There are many people with different personality disorders and overlooking those things because of money could make you regret your action.
This is just like pretending to love a guy because he has money, he spends on you and when the time comes, he brings up his behaviour and starts beating the hell out of you. Instead of leaving such a relationship, you stay because he apologizes by bribing you with money and gift.
He will keep taking advantage of you because he knows the end of it is him giving you money and you accept it. That's stupidity if I must say.
Your love shouldn't be bought with money but show your worth that you are of value. You are worth more than the gold.
Find true love and you will enjoy it peacefully. Just like I said, money only increases the chances of love but that shouldn't determine the extent of your love.
The truth is that real men or women won't think of buying your love with their money but showing how much they love you through their actions.
Money cannot buy love because you will be opened to reality when you wouldn't be able to even spend the money when their true character is shown.
Thanks for reading
Image from Sharon from Unsplash https://unsplash.com/photos/ZihPQeQR2wM
[August 02, 2022] (No 214 articles for the year)
She is not contented.
*“Teaching self-discipline to children is a vital part of the parenting job description.”*
Mike Weiford
Happy new month everyone. I hope this August brings good tidings for us and may we always have reasons to stay happy and contented. I just hope the electricity is restored as I need to stay active today. The light only came last on Saturday afternoon and since then till now, there is no light and my power banks are down. My phone's battery is 34% at the time of writing this article.
Let me see if I would find an alternative though but it won't be like seeing the electricity come.
Two weeks ago on Friday, I was at home very early in the morning when I wanted to go out with a friend. This little girl that wouldn't be over 10 years came, all dressed in her uniform and came to me and begged for money, saying she needed to buy an exercise book to write her test.
I was curious why a girl would come to our house to beg for such a thing. I wanted to ask her of her parents. Perhaps asking if she talked to them about it before or if their school didn't provide any books for them. I was in a hurry and I quickly gave her #200 (a little cent though) that would cover her book and still have some change to buy goodies for herself. She thanked me and left.
The following Monday, she came around. She knocked and I noticed it was this same girl. What is she doing here again? I asked. It took me a long while before I opened the door and the next thing was to ask for the toilet. I saw on her face that this was not what she wanted. I asked why the toilet, and she nodded her head in the negative.
When she wasn't saying anything, I told her the key toilet wasn't with me and that she should be going home straight or to school. I asked if her house wasn't far, and she said no. Why then would she think of coming to me? Perhaps she wanted another money because I gave her the first time she came but I sent her away.
On the third day was when I was preparing to travel and I had already gotten dressed but was busy doing something on my phone when I heard a knock. When I opened the door, it was this same girl. This time around, she wanted food and she asked if I cooked anything. I asked where was her house and why would she be coming here every morning.
I sent her away telling her I don't have any food and can't give her any money. She left my place and went to another room. I was surprised. Is this what she use to do at every house?
It was then I knew she had food in her flask because when she went to meet another lady, she asked what is in her flask. I wasn't even focusing on her flask to ask what was in there. She said the food her grandma gave to her wasn't enough.
A little girl saying that? I couldn't believe it when I was told. This little girl isn't contented and she might have been to different houses before ours to be begging at such an age.
Her parents wouldn't know what she is always doing every morning before going to school. Asking for money. What does she want to use the money for?
She wasn't happy her grandma gave her food to school. Not every child would see such an opportunity.
The girl might easily be lured once they know how much she wants money. They might rape or use her for money rituals, especially in this era in my country. People are looking for any opportunity to use others in exchange for money and once they get to know someone like her, that would be easy work for them.
Not only that, she might be a victim of teenage pregnancy and her life would be ruined through that.
There are children like her who aren't monitored by their parents but believes their children are in school doing better. Whereas, they are doing something else.
She can easily be deceived by her friends or mates and that is the end.
Parents need to watch over their children especially when they aren't under their watch. Always go to their school to see what they are doing. Don't depend solely on teachers to do the work.
This is why I would always appreciate my parents because they tried to bring us up in a good manner even though lack of money couldn't help them achieve their goals. Ever since we started kindergarten till we finish secondary school, my dad had never missed a day checking on us except on some days he had events to organize with his band.
Children can be so cunny and this is why parents need to be wiser than them to always keep watch, monitor, and observe what they do.
Thanks for reading
Image from Pexels https://www.pexels.com/photo/lonely-girl-sitting-on-a-doorway-236215/
[August 01, 2022] (No 213 articles for the year)
What next after the pursuit?
*“Rise or fall doesn’t matter, if you've helped a few people.”*
Abhijit Naskar https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/pursuit-of-success
Just a few hours remaining and we have gone through 31 days in July. This month is really fast in my eyes because I still remembered when we entered a new month and it was a beautiful day. Right now, we would be wishing everyone another happy new month of August.
God has been faithful, isn't it? To me, I couldn't have asked more from Him after being given His grace, mercy, provision, goodness, safety etc. What else do I need again? He gave me everything I needed. Should I talk about the opportunities of earning and being lucky?
Should I talk about those beautiful friends He brought to my path? Should I talk about those times I have been blessed? What about you? Are you grateful?
Let's move to the topic for today before I digress too much. Happy Sunday, everyone 🥳
For today's article, I would be taking us into a story of a rich young ruler in the Bible.
Note that I called him ***“A rich young ruler”***. This means he was so rich and wealthy and had everything in his possession because the Bible confirmed that he was a wealthy man.
I believe he was troubled in his heart as he need something more in his life but was confused.
He asked Jesus what he must do to inherit heaven. Jesus told him to abide by the commandments which were staying away from adultery, stealing, killing, backbiting etc.
And this young man replied saying all of these, he has stayed away from right from his youthful age.
**What then is missing in his life?**
Jesus confirmed again that something was missing in his life and when he asked what that thing was? Jesus said, *“Go and sell your possession and give to the poor”.*
We all crave success and want to achieve our dreams and aims in life. In a situation whereby you have gotten everything you need. You have money, good health and a good relationship with God etc. What else? You would ask!
***What else do I need when God has been added to my achievement?***
Just like the young ruler, just one thing was missing apart from him being wealthy and having it all. He might also have a good relationship with God, seeing how he spoke to Jesus and even followed all the commandments.
That one thing that was missing was **Generosity.**
He was asked to sell his stuff and share among the poor. He was saddened as he didn't want to lose it all, but he has forgotten the one who made him wealthy.
This is the problem of many people. We all want everything to ourselves alone without stretching our hands to help others, especially the poor.
The truth is that we can never have peace of mind if we don't help people who need help.
Yes, we have everything in our possession, but not helping people and not showing generosity can never bring peace to you.
After our pursuit in life, and generosity is still lacking, you are only deceiving yourself because even the Bible says that those who have something and do not give to those who need it would be cursed by the people. So, we must seek and go after teaching ourselves how to be generous to other people.
Without showing generosity, everything we have is nothing to us and wouldn't mean anything at all until we realize that there are people who are created for us to help them.
Not everyone would be wealthy or rich but those who have it all and shares it with others would be blessed abundantly.
Give and it shall be given unto you. This is very true because it is always more blessed to give than to receive.
Showing generosity comes with love. You can't give to people if you don't love them. So without much emotion, your mind will never allow you to help others who are in need.
So, in our daily lives and after achieving all that we wanted including having God and most importantly, good health, let's not forget to be a giver and help others so we can also be helped.
Do not have it all and withhold everything in your possession. Share with others and you will have peace and gain the good heart of God.
Thanks for reading
*Images by* *Bennett* *and* *Elaine* *on Unsplash* https://unsplash.com/photos/nsQDm1nBGIs https://unsplash.com/photos/qgHGDbbSNm8
[July 31, 2022] (No 212 articles for the year)
Waste a Pad for a day or be embarrassed?
*“Saturday is the thing that gives us a weekend of enjoyment.”*
Anthony T. Hinks https://kidadl.com/quotes/best-saturday-quotes-to-welcome-the-weekend
It's the weekend again and I am happy because we would be entering a new week soon 😎😎 The week has been a great one, especially with me travelling as a way to change the environment. Though I haven't made friends yet. Well, it's too early for that. I don't even know how to start one first 😅 I have been staying indoors with my phone as my buddy. We are good since it's helping me clear away this boredom.
I read a post on Hive by a friend (Merit.ahama) where she narrated the pain ladies go through when they are on their period and how she got stained on her interview day. She wore a yellow skirt and you know how obvious it would be if the stain eventually had its way out.
She was like she should have been alerted that it would show up that day but didn't. She needs a sign that the uninterested visitor will be coming, like something dropping off from her hand or an inch on the ass or even a tear dropping involuntarily from the eyes 😂😂😂 Will that even be possible?
I commented and told her what to do next in case it happens and my own experience.
I used to get the sign a few days before its arrival. I would feel pains in my abdomen, this won't be severe but a way to know that it will happen soon and so, I should get prepared and if I had waited and expected it to come and it didn't come, I will still keep calm. But when it happens that I need to go somewhere, I prepared myself by using the pad even if it won't show up but at least, I had planned myself so I wouldn't feel uneasiness.
Wasting a day's pad is better than being embarrassed because I have experienced this before. I went out that day even when I have been seeing the signs that it would come but I waved it off thinking I would go where I need to go and come back home but it disappointed me.
I felt this strange thing in my body and when I went to use the toilet to confirm, I saw a little drop of blood in my pants and ever since that moment, I wasn't feeling comfortable. I couldn't sit for long because it would stain me and the chair.
I felt unstable and wasn't even paying attention to what the person was saying again. My mind was all in the blood not staining me because it would be an embarrassment for me.
When I got home, my pants were soaked but what saved me that day was the black skirt I wore. I had to lift my shirt from the skirt so it won't stain it. Though the skirt was soaked too it wasn't obvious outside. I was scared it would smell out because the period has this bad odor. Thank God I got home to quickly took my bath and change. I felt relief and I promised myself to always use a pad if I am going out even if it doesn't come. At least wasting a day's pad won't be a problem because I need to prepare myself to avoid unnecessary moments that could destabilize my system.
Let me share this particular one again when I was in secondary school. I got to school but didn't know my period would be arriving. I played with my friends and had some lectures till after the break that day. When we went inside for another subject, my friend called and told me my uniform was stained at the back.
I didn't feel any pain and I wondered how it happened unnoticed. Since then, I didn't stand up until when all students had gone home after the closing bell was rung.
My two friends stayed with me and everyone left the school. When I was sure no one was in school, I stood up. By this time, the locker I sat on had been stained and full of blood. I immediately cleaned it with my handkerchief and went home.
I took a bike straight from the school gate that took me home and dropped me in front of the house. The bike seat was also stained which I cleaned without letting the bike man know anything and I paid the fare.
It was a bad day for me but thank God I found a bike to take me home because it is uncommon for a bike to take me to such a far distance. I used to board a bus while I trek the remaining but that day happened like a miracle for me.
So, I prefer to waste my pad for a day when I am going out than to be embarrassed. At least you can still wait for it and not use the pad if you are at home and aren't going anywhere.
Thanks for reading
*Image by* *Alexander* *on Unsplash* https://unsplash.com/photos/0OxCCp06qLo
[July 30, 2022] (No 211 articles for the year)
What do you do if he or she cheats on you?
*“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.”*
Margaret Mead
No one can stop infidelity in some people because the human relationship isn't absolute. There is no friendship or relationship with being married together that is complete. Why is it that way? This is because human beings have been conditioned to do what they want to do and not what others want them to do.
This is the reason you see people doing what they feel like even if they receive advice from others. They just want to satisfy themselves and that is it. No man can change any human being. You are deceiving yourself if you think you can because you will hurt yourself in that process.
Things I have been seeing lately had made me see to what extent some people can go to hurt another person. It saddens me to see a wife burning her husband to death because he cheated.
The day I read the news, the only question that came to my mind was ***“Is killing him the solution?”***
Why would you think of setting someone ablaze just because he cheated and you cannot think of calling him and talking to him? Better still, if you have talked to him and he still didn't change, then leave if you aren't comfortable with it. It is not in your hand to punish another fellow even if you are so connected to him or her.
No lives should be claimed through you. Just because you both are married doesn't give you the licence to kill him or her over infidelity. At least you would have seen the red flags before both of you tied the knot.
We can never know everyone's behaviour until we are both joined together and they start revealing the true person they are and with that, you still cannot know them to the end. Even when you thought you have known everything about them, they still would introduce a new behaviour and you will be shocked.
Burning your partner over infidelity has now become a trending one because I read of a young girl who also set her partner ablaze over this same issue.
These people aren't even married yet and all you could think of is to kill him. Is it that you don't want to see them cheating again or not to see them forever?
This is also like punishing yourself if you ever think of punishing another person.
To me, it's barbaric and uncalled for. There is no excuse or reason for killing another man because you aren't in such a position to take lives. A life you can never bring back again. You only kill but cannot raise back.
Killing someone means his or her blood is in your hands and it will forever haunt you.
Infidelity comes when a man isn't contented. Greediness brings infidelity and there's nothing you can do to a man who isn't faithful to his wife except he wants to change himself. Same thing with a woman.
Now, what do you do when your partner cheats on you?
Well, you may think what am I about to say, especially seeing a single like me but trust me, I have seen and heard many things about people and I can speak my opinion and understand what is happening.
Everyone is unique and we all want the best for ourselves. Yes, we love so much that it hurts us to see someone cheating on us and we feel as if we aren't better enough. It's okay to think that way because we are humans and have feelings in us.
When you see your partner cheating on you, call them if it is the first time seeing them. Talk to them and let them know you don't like it and if they still do not change, the best is to walk away and know that you are special and desire to be cared for.
You deserve someone better and if you cannot stay to endure which I doubt anyone would do, just walk away from the relationship and if they truly love you, they will come back and change for good.
In my viewpoint, I wouldn't want anything to compromise or jeopardize my happiness and so, the only thing is for me to walk away because I know I deserved better.
This can happen during courtship before you both tie the knot. Observe each other's behaviour and attitudes before you get married. There are warning signs in relationships and if you are so blinded to see them, you will be at fault if anything should happen later when you have been united.
Don't think of killing your partner just because they cheated on you. Yes, you have both gone through a lot and you think they shouldn't betray you. Humans would be humans and we aren't perfect except for Christ's relationship who is absolute.
Step away if you can't handle or endure it because you will feel sorry for yourself if you try something bad.
Fighting someone doesn't mean they should die. No matter how wicked someone is, we don't pray for death for them because when they are gone, we would be hurt more. So who then loses?
Though the woman who burnt her husband also committed suicide. What is now the gain? Will that solve the issue? The woman could have just stayed away from the marriage.
No man or woman would put up bad behaviour except if they have been doing it before coming together. The man would have been cheating before getting married and he continued in the act.
May God help us all. Killing isn't the solution. It makes us weak and not strong people.
Thanks for reading
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[July 29, 2022] (No 210 articles for the year)
My Anti-Bucket Lists.
*“If you’re going to grow, you have to be intentional.”*
Curt Kampmeier https://www.morethanmainstreet.com/living-intentionally-quotes-motivational-words-inspire/
WHAT ARE ANTI-BUCKET LISTS?
We have many times heard of the word Bucket List before and we all do have them listed somewhere to achieve before we die. We want to build our own houses, visit different continents, meet someone from another country etc. Bucket lists are those lists we want to achieve before we leave this world and they are just like our goals to achieve.
The Anti-bucket list is the opposite of it. These are lists we want to avoid and the activities we will never do at all cost and they are like disciplining ourselves not to break the promise of not doing them. When we make this kind of lists, it means we are being sincere to ourselves and ready to stand by our words. This means nothing should compromise it.
So, here with me, I have eight Anti-bucket lists I wouldn't want to do but avoid them at all costs if I want the best for myself and this is my way of setting my goals and making sure I don't go against what I have said.
STOP BEING GRATEFUL AND IGNORING MY SPIRITUAL LIFE.
All my life, I have always been grateful to God and He has never stopped blessing me with more. A grateful heart is a happy heart. I will never stop being grateful to God and ignore my spiritual life. Every day of my life, I have always wanted more closeness with God and a deeper relationship with Him and so, I won't stop.
QUIT LEARNING
Learning is a permanent change in an individual and we keep learning till we die. Learning never stops and one who stops learning is a dead man already and a fool.
I will not quit learning and acquiring knowledge because it makes me grow each day in wisdom. Learning takes place when we read books, listen to lectures or conversations, watch the news, learn new words etc.
IGNORE MY HEALTH
Health is wealth and if we don't take care of our health by being conscious of what we eat and do, it will affect us and we may lose our lives along the line. What is the purpose of the money you have made when you cannot spend it? What is the purpose of your success when you are lying on the sickbed and can't enjoy it especially when you are being laid in the casket? So, I wouldn't want to ignore my health and keep chasing after everything.
SPENDING TIME WORRYING
Why worry over things we cannot control? We only have control over those things that we can do but things beyond our capacity and ability, we don't need to get worried over them but to move on with other things in life.
Worrying only causes sickness to the body and it makes one forget about the good things around us, focusing on the bad sides of life. I don't want to continue worrying over things that will eventually take my gaze off the pleasant things of life because there is more to life than I can ever think of.
FIGHT WITH MY SIBLINGS
One thing I have always loved is the unity and cooperation among my siblings and me. We do everything together and I will never fight with them. Though it is normal for misunderstanding to happen, it won't take long before we settle it. I don't want us to become each other's enemies. When we fight, I forgive them and it ends there.
COMPARE MYSELF TO OTHERS
I have come to understand that we all are different and our timings are different. Everyone is lucky, the time and ways are just different. So, why would I compare myself to others when I know my time will come for me to be great and successful?. Instead of comparing myself, I can choose to celebrate others' wins and be happy for them while I am patient with mine.
GIVE UP
One who gives up has already believed that he is worthless and can never achieve anything. I don't want to give up because Thomas Edison failed 1000 times and never gave up. I am a failure if I give up, so I won't allow that.
STOP TO SEE THE BEAUTY OF THE WORLD
Many of us have allowed our situations, circumstances and problems of life to take our eyes off the beauty we can actually see around us and so, we miss a lot of things and fun in it.
There are beauties in nature, landscape, everywhere but when we are overshadowed by our circumstances, we fall out of such beautiful moments. I don't want to be too carried away in worries and blind my eyes to see the real beauty in this world. So, I will never stop seeing the beauty therein in this world.
Thanks for reading
*Image by* *Anete* *on Pexels* https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-with-long-nails-writing-text-in-diary-7256738/
[July 28, 2022] (No 209 articles for the year)
@Princessbusayo
