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@Paganprincess in January 2021

@Paganprincess

My husband said he sent a text to me saying he loves me and I didn't respond... Turns out he sent it to his boss by mistake. 😳😂

@Paganprincess

For some, even the promise of receiving is not enough to make them give.

@Paganprincess

Oz: 'So, do you guys steal weapons from the Army a lot?' Willow: 'Well, we don't have cable, so we have to make our own fun.'

@Paganprincess

'He will make the wrong choice everytime because he's too damaged to love anybody or the believe anybody could love him.' -Children shouldn't play with dead things series

@Paganprincess

'You were invisible. You were tired of it, of being ignored.' 'So what happened?' 'You stopped hiding.'

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Meeting Dr. Silva (Part 1 of a Series) There was a beeping sound. Constant and steady and never ending. Somewhere in the back of my mind it felt like I knew what it was but I couldn't figure it out. It was like the word slipped away before I could focus on it. I slowly opened my eyes. The first thing I noticed was that I was laying in a bed that was not my own. And there was a needle in my arm. I looked to my left to find the source of the beeping. A heart monitor. Of…

@Paganprincess

'It's all fun and games until she obliterates you from existence.' 'She didn't obliterate me. She's just, ignoring me.' 'There's a difference?'

@Paganprincess

I'm the girl nobody ever wastes time thinking about. I'm the one who could drop off the face of the Earth and no one would come looking. Nobody would even notice. I'm the the girl nobody misses.... But that's OK. At least it's peaceful.

@Paganprincess

Tara: 'My mommy's a weirdo!' Me: 'Yes I am.' Tara: 'My daddy's a weirdo!' Me: 'Yes he is.' Tara: 'My whole family's weird!' Me: 'Yes we are.' Tara: 'AHHHH!!!'

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The Missing Piece (Dr. Silva Part 2 ) I'm not sure how long I slept but I woke up to find Dr. Silva entering the room. I'm not sure even of what woke me, maybe I'd had some sense that I wasn't alone. She gave me a warm smile that instantly made me feel better in spite of where I was and my quick awakening. She glanced at my heart monitor as it beeped frantically. 'I'm sorry I startled you miss Ainsley.' 'Lilly.' I corrected her. 'Lilly, then.' I watched as she checked the…

@Paganprincess

For years every now and then I have a dream about a house. I know it's a house even though I never see all of it. I only ever see a hallway lined with white doors and an impossibly long staircase.

@Paganprincess

Hour and a half on the treadmill done. How am I feeling? Sweaty, gross and accomplished. Time for a shower.

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More Questions than Answers (Dr. Silva Part 3) It wasn't until a few days later that I could finally look at anyone who entered my room. I still felt a mixture of horror, sadness, confusion and anger but mostly I just felt hollow. I got taken off my IV and, to my relief had my catheter removed. On top of everything else I was feeling I was also sick and tired of being stuck in this one room. I was tired of feeling like a caged animal. The other thing that was bothering me…

@Paganprincess

Readers constantly add to themselves. We take a little piece of every book we read and make it a part of us.

@Paganprincess

John walking into kitchen: 'What's on the TV?' Me: 'My show. I paused it so I could finish working in here.' John: 'Are you sure?' Me: 'Yea...' *walks into living room followed by John and sees anime p*rn taking up the screen* 'That is not my show.' *closes ad to reveal show underneath* John: 'Ok. I had some questions.'

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This article is a mess I apologize if this article is a bit scattered or you know, a lot. The warning is right in the title though. I'm trying to juggle multiple things at once at the moment. If it is scattered, it's a perfect representation of my current thought pattern. Besides, I could clean it up, but sometimes I think it's good to show the messier side of things. At least then other people who are the same way can realize they are not alone. That everything doesn't…

@Paganprincess

'I've lost my hat!' 'It's on your head.' He blinked. 'I've lost my head!' 'You know,' Alice said to the March Hare as they watched the Hatter run in circles, 'I do believe he's right.'

@Paganprincess

I'm a firm believer in tipping delivery drivers but if you ignore the instructions, ignore me because you'd rather talk to a man and then rudely demand/tell me I am going to tip you then you will NOT get tipped. I don't do well with orders.

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Delivery Issues (No Tip) Please, before you judge based on the title, read the article. I had originally planned to make a chicken dish with potatoes tonight for supper but I just didn't feel up to cooking. When I told my husband I was lacking energy, he suggested we order pizza. I agreed. We haven't ordered in a while I wasn't going to say no to the break. Plus, leftover pizza freezes well so that means instead of being stuck eating it for days in a row, I can just pop it…

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There's this guy who likes to engage me in a battle of wits even though he's already lost twice. Points for perseverance, though.

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The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. Medieval proverb

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Blood relation is not a reason to put up with abuse. Toxic is toxic whatever person dishes it out.

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Captured (Part 1) 'Natalie, drinks after work tonight?' Her coworker Rick pocked his head over the cubical wall, a hopeful expression on his face. She shook her head. 'I can't tonight.' Rick pouted and gave his best puppy dog eyes which only earned a laugh from his companion. 'You sure? It's Kates' birthday and we're all going out to celebrate.' 'I can't. I'm going to look at an old house. Sort of a, sentimental thing.' Hopefully he wouldn't ask too many questions. She felt…

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I am working on a few different pieces at the moment. My Dr. Silva piece is currently on hold until I can figure out exactly where I want it to go. There's another piece I've been working on which I have just posted the first part of. (Captured)

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'I've seen honest faces before. They usually come attached to liars.' -Willow

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Woke up with a headache for the third day in a row 😣

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I'm not cleaning up after you. You got yourself into the mess, you deal with it.

@Paganprincess

Diary of A Broken Child Monday June 16th 1997 Daddy came home and the first thing he did was ask for me. 'Where's my little princess?' He said and I went to him. He's not my real dad but he's nice and he makes mommy happy so I like him too. I still love my real daddy too. We're going to spend time together next weekend he's going to take time off work for me. Thursday September 10th 1997 Mommy and daddy are going out for a date on Saturday and daddy says I have to stay home.…

@Paganprincess

Put my phone on charge at 15%, go back and check it a half hour later only to find it sitting at 3%

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Captured (Part 2) It was silent as the grave and just as suffocating. The air was heavy and filled with something that didn't belong. Mixed with the smell of a long forgotten home was something else, something darker. Her ears strained for and hint of her assailant as she tried to make sense of her situation without opening her eyes. She seemed to be bound to a chair. She must have been out a while then. 'No use pretending. I know you're awake.' The voice was male, cold.…

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Xander: Aren’t you supposed to be drinking tea anyway? Giles: Tea is soothing. I wish to be tense. Xander: Okay, but your destroying a perfectly good cultural stereotype here.

@Paganprincess

$3.00 cashback on yogurt and 25 cents back on eggs. Every penny counts! 😁

@Paganprincess

Cashback/Money Saving Apps Since I've been on the look out for ways to save money, I've started looking at cash back apps a little more closely than I used to. Checkout 51 is something I've been using for a while on and off depending on what deals they have. The other day they had a deal for Dole salad kits where you could claim up to 5 and get a dollar cashback. Those ones are all gone now to my knowledge but I did snag a few before they disappeared. I don't normally buy…

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My thoughts are a labyrinth and I am lost within its depths.

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The Calming Touch (Dr. Silva Part 4) 'You shouldn't be here, Lilly.' Dr. Silva put a hand out and I instantly jumped out of her reach. I didn't know what kind of freaky thing she was doing with her hands but there was no way I was letting her touch me. I had been so focused on trying to make sense of what I had seen that I had failed to notice I'd followed them back to what I assumed was the other patients room. 'Alex.' The name slipped from my lips and the man jerked his…

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My legs are KILLING me from my workout and I still have another day to go.

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Gone Waiting. I hate waiting. I brought things with me. A computer, books, and a few things to fiddle with, just to keep my hands busy. None of it helps. None of it works. Staring at the computer screen to watch one of my favorite shows is useless and I quickly give up. People keep telling me to calm down, relax. They tell me everything will be fine. I'm just getting worked up. I worry too much. I do worry too much but this time I have a reason. How can I not worry when I…

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Ding-Dong Ditch Ding-Dong Ditch. It's just a fun game, right? Well, fun for the people playing it anyway, not so fun for the ones on the receiving end but who really cares about them, right? Still as it turns out, it's not always fun for the ones playing it either. My friends and I don't do it anymore. Not after what happened the last time. I'm not really supposed to talk about it; they said people will think I'm crazy but, I think I might go crazy if I don't tell someone.…

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Went to 3 different stores looking for pickles/relish and nothing. Is there a shortage I don't know about or something?

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Quarantine 'So, quarantine.' He said conversationally. 'Don't. Even.' She told him firmly. 'Just, don't.' He scoffed and sat on one of the two beds in the sparse room. Not a bed really, just a cot with a pillow and a thin blanket. 'I was just trying to make conversation. You know, make the best of it.' She paced the room and silently cursed. This was Hell. She had died and done something so horrible that she had ended up here. That was the only explanation for being trapped…

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My weekend/plans today I've been keeping an eye on deals again lately. Anything to save a bit of money. Flashfood hasn't had much of interest over the last week but Checkout 51 did reload deals as they do every Thursday and I took full advantage. They had a $1.00 cashback deal on Astro yogurt again and since we all like yogurt, I did pick more up. Luckily it was also on sale at Food Basics for $1.99 so after cashback a 650g container of yogurt only cost me 99 cents. While I…

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'He will make the wrong choice everytime because he's too damaged to love anybody or the believe anybody could love him.' -Children shouldn't play with dead things series

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The Lab (Dr. Silva Part 5) 'I thought you said lab?' As I stared around the room, I couldn't help thinking Dr. Silva had gotten very confused about where we were supposed to be. This was not a lab. It looked more like a hangout. Aside from myself and Dr. Silva there were a few others in the room. A little girl sat quietly flipping through a book in the corner and next to her a boy who may have been in his late teens at most, and another boy who looked like he was staring off…

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Do not pursue the past Do not lose yourself in the future The past no longer is The future has not yet come Buddhist Proverb

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Comfort She was curled up on her side clinging onto her pillow for dear life. If she could squeeze it hard enough, maybe she wouldn't fall apart. The man next to her wanted to help but was at a loss as to how. 'It will pass you know. The pain. I know it doesn't feel like it at the moment...' Knowing his words held no comfort for her he stopped speaking and turned toward the door. He had known her for a good chunk of her life and seeing her this way was torture. He had always…

@Paganprincess

Not a bad week As anybody who has been reading my articles likely knows by now, I love using cashback apps and flashfood. Flashfood can be great for discounts and I've been keeping an eye on it daily to find anything of interest. Minus the coffee creamer and yogurt, there hasn't been much on Checkout51 this week but I did pick up a fair amount of yogurt and salad kits. I probably got around $12 cashback total over the last few weeks just on salad and yogurt alone. The salad…

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It's funny how someone we helped said we were relying on him and we couldn't survive without him yet he's looking to us for money and help...

@Paganprincess

When you vent about people talking behind your back and someone sends you a message pretending they care when they're one of them.

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Reffus 'Now, this is important. Don't ever open this app. Do. Not. Touch.' The woman punctuated the last three words by poking the counter next to the phone harshly. The nineteen year old barely spared a glance at the lone app on the last page of the application screen. 'Can't you just take it out? If I don't need it there's no point in it being there.' The woman shook her head. 'I can't remove it. It's a factory install. Even if you do manage to get it out things won't work…

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Inside My Characters Mind I was abandoned so many times. Left to rot on the side of the road like so much trash. Oh, I wore my heart on my sleeve and everybody knew it. They all had a piece of it and they all destroyed it. Not one of one of them cared. Not one of them ever tried to make it better. Finally, when there was nothing left they all turned away just forgot like it didn't mean anything. I guess it didn't to them but it meant everything to me. I didn't understand how…

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You can't use your past as an excuse to treat others badly. I've been hurt more times than I can count and I have not healed yet I still refuse to hurt others because of what I've gone through.

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Lucky Deal on Flashfood/Basic Update It's only Wednesday and I must admit, I'm already drained. As is a common theme I have been trying more and more to save money lately especially when it comes to groceries. The main reason for shrinking the grocery bill is because it's the only bill we really have that isn't fixed. In my last article I mentioned there hadn't been a lot of options on Flashfood and at the time of writing, that was true. I did however luck out (I think it…

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Only halfway through the week and I'm already exhausted 😪

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Dinner I decided to focus on using things I currently have as much as possible to cook meals. With a half full fridge and a full deep freeze, the main parts (the meat) are all there so it's mainly figuring out how to work with the canned goods I have in new ways (or ways I haven't used them in a while.) We mainly have pork as it is the cheapest meat in our area. Pork chops, ground pork, sausages and a pork shoulder I cut up into multiple meals. Since there is basically…

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Next step in saving more in the future, bulk buy non perishables.

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The past is the past for a reason. You have to let old feelings and grudges go.

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Us to Landlord: 'Can you turn on the heat? It's cold. Landlord: 'It's automatic. It will go in if it gets too cold.' Landlord *coming into apartment later says to her daughter* 'Don't come in. It's cold.' So it's too cold for your child to walk in for two minutes but not to cold for my family to live in... Something isn't right there. 😒

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Woke up with no voice. Hours later, still can't talk. 😣

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Reunions and Accusations Sebastian made his way over to the bar. Though the bartender noticed him immediately she waited a few moments before sauntering over. 'I'm surprised you're still here.' 'And why's that?' 'I just assumed you'd have moved on by now. Keep people from getting suspicious. Hasn't anybody noticed you haven't aged in the last fourteen years?' 'Oh honey please. You got sixty year olds out here looking like they're twenty. Some of them look better than I do…

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Finally get my husband to save money and I start feeling less stressed then what happens? He goes out and spends $85.00 on an XBox controller. and then decides to use the rest of the money to replace my TV that he broke months ago even though I 'told' him I'd rather wait. I appreciate the gesture but since it is a replacement for me, shouldn't I have the say?

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1st batch of pizza bagels. Making 12. Total cost to feed my family of 3 and provide lunch to my husband for work tomorrow: $8.35.