@Orchidaceae 2 December 2020

Cliques

The *****clique***** is probably the most prevalent social structure of early adolescence. A clique is defined by Webster as "a narrow exclusive circle or group of persons." Eric Johnson defines it as "a small group of friends who stick together and shut others out."" While cliques are certainly not limited to junior highers, they do seem to take on great importance during the early adolescent years and cause a great deal of concern for middle school and junior high workers and teachers. Ideally we want to foster a feeling of unity within the group, with each person expressing openness and friendliness toward everyone else, but that is very seldom attained in junior high groups. Even though most junior highers themselves regard cliques as unfair and wrong, they can't seem to avoid them. They are a major part of the social life of the adolescent; they help in the transition from dependency on the family to the many upcoming associations outside the family. A junior higher would probably define the clique that he or she is a part of as "my best friends."

A common question asked by youth workers in the church is "How can I break up the cliques in my junior high group?" The question arises naturally, since it is generally acknowledged that cliques are not desirable and should be eliminated if possible. For a long time I had difficulty coming up with an answer that would satisfy me, let alone anyone else. I, like most junior high workers, have never had much success at breaking up cliques. I finally came to the conclusion that it was essentially counterproductive and perhaps even a mistake to try, Good or bad, cliques are going to exist and are part of the early adolescent landscape. It's best to work around them rather than against them. It is possible, however, to reduce the negative impact of cliques in the junior high group. One way is to provide as many opportunities as possible for group interaction and participation. Whenever the group or class is doing something together-mixing, playing games, talking to each other-relationships between cliques and individuals are more likely to improve. But when kids come to a meeting or activity in their cliques. stay in their cliques, listen to or participate in the program in their cliques, and then leave in their cliques, there is little chance that conditions will improve. Rather than lecture on the evils of cliques, it is best to involve the kids in a variety of activity-centered learning experiences that require communication and cooperation with each other, as well as in group games, and other chances to relate to those outside their little cliques. Most people of all ages find new friends by accident, not by design. You can't tell someone to stop liking one person and start liking someone else. You don't create community and unity by having little buzz groups and hand-holding sessions (although it has happened). Community and friendships develop usually as a by-product of something else. If a group puts on a play, goes on a long trip together, or participates in a service project, chances are good that kids will make new friends, cliques will become less important, and community will be encouraged almost automatically. It's also true that small group projects or activities in which the group is allowed to choose its own members serve to encourage or strengthen cliques. Small groups work fine with junior highers, but it is usually best to use a random selection process to determine group members or to assign kids to groups not entirely made up of their close friends.

*****Creating a Sense of Belonging***** An appropriate goal of junior high ministry is to create a place where every young person can feel that he or she is part of the group. This is One reason why I believe that junior high clubs-with a unique name, membership cards, caps or T-shirts, rites and responsibilities of membership, etc.__ can be very effective. Many junior high groups have names like JC-DC which stands for Jesus Christ's Disciple Club, or THE CLICK, which stands for Christ Living in Christian Kids. Clubs like these can provide a sense of belonging which is very important to early adolescents. Anything you can do to promote inclusiveness and community wil be beneficial in junior high ministry. It helps to remember that Junior high groups don't develop community automaticaly. In fact the reverse is more likely. If you don't intentionally do things to build community, you will more than likely see it fall apart. Kids naturally get into their cliques and do as little as possible to allow new kids or kids who are different to become part of their particular group. That's why you will need to constantly be looking for ways to help kids get to know each other better and learn to accept each other as fellow members of the body of Christ. @Orchidaceae