@Orchidaceae 7 December 2020

Catch Junior Highers in the Act of Doing Something Good

You can't control how junior highers feel about themselves, but you can control how you respond to them. You can impact their self-image significantly by letting them know that you do indeed like them and want to be around them. This is another reason why relationships in youth ministry are so important-they help young people build self esteem. You give junior highers some very important information about themselves when you let them know you believe in them and take them seriously. And as i discussed in my article, a good way to do this is to listen to them. When you give a junior higher your atten- tion by being a good listener, you let her know that what she has to say is important and that you value her as a person.

Another excellent way to help early adolescents build self- esteem is to say something positive to them whenever you can and conversely, to avoid putting them down or making fun of them. Be liberal with praise. Catch them doing something good and let them know that you noticed. Most junior highers I know are so used to being scolded, nagged, criticized, and ridiculed that they think they have a sign on their back that says, "Kick me, I'm a junior high kid!" Compli- ment your junior highers whenever you have the opportunity. Mark Twain once said, "I can live two months on one good compliment." Junior highers, of course, need to be complimented more often than that. And when you do compliment them, it's best to emphasize positive character traits rather than possessions or appearance. "Ireally appreciated the way you helped out last night," rather than "That's a great-looking shirt!" And don't hesitate to compliment them in front o other people, especially their parents. Even though they may act uneasy and embarrassed, down deep inside they are taking their bows and basking in the glory of it all.

*****Giving Them Opportunities to Succeed***** We can also help young adolescents build self-esteem by giving them meaningful responsibilities and opportunities for success. The second most important value to junior highers (the first is "to make my own decisions") is "to do something important with my life"a Idealistic junior highers have a keen desire to do something important with their lives, but they have few opportunities to do so. As a result they become discouraged and begin to believe that they are, in fact, incompetent and useless.

Most adults consider junior highers too immature and too irresponsible to do meaningful work. This is why there is virtually no job market for them. Interestingly enough, junior highers are the nation's baby-sitters. Almost every 1l-to-14-year-old earns extra money by baby-sitting. The irony of this is that often the people who consider junior highers to be so immature and irresponsible are the same people who entrust their most prized possessions-their babies-into the care and safekeeping of junior highers. Either junior highers are in fact responsible, or adults are acting irresponsibly by leaving them alone with their babies. I think we know the truth. Junior highers are capable of accepting responsibility and they should be given every opportunity to "do something important with their lives. The same junior higher who won't pick up his dirty clothes off the bedroom floor will often jump at the chance to do something for someone else who needs work done.

There are literally millions of junior highers all over America who have nothing to do after school except to hang out, watch television, or get into trouble. Some of them are the "latchkey kids" who come home to empty houses because of working parents or parents who are absent. These young people represent a tremendous mission field for junior high workers who want to reach junior highers for Christ and make a significant difference in their lives. Churches could provide all kinds of meaningful after-school activities, such as mission and service projects, apprenticeships, volunteer work, and the arts, such as drama and music. The after-school hours remain a tremendous opportunity for ministry to junior highers." @Orchidaceae