@Lucifan

My Favorite Tortoise Stories (3) Hello guys. This is going to be the last in this interesting series as I think I'm running out of tortoise stories and you're probably getting tired of them. Forgive my manners. Hope your day went well my friends. By this time, I'm sure work has fully started. Hope it's not too stressful for you. Or at least I hope it is rewarding in it's own way. Take care of yourselves guys coz no one can do that better than you. Now to today's stories. Prepare for a little more of tortoise the villain. 1) **Tortoise and dog 1** Once upon a time, there was famine in the animal kingdom. The land was barren and the rivers were dry. Cannibalism was beginning to shine reasonable to most. Needless to say that all animals were getting so thing you could recreate a picture of their skeletons of you had a pen and paper and had only seen them once! Well, this was true for all except (yes) dog! Tortoise the cunning was of course the one to notice something as trivial as this. Just imagine that there's a whole kingdom of animals and he can tell exactly what's up with each one to the extent that he can tell if you've not lost enough weight! Well, being the cunning one he was, he approached dog about it in confidence. "Dog my friend how are you". "I'm fine thanks". "Really?". "Yeah". Tortoise bursts into tears. Aww man don't cry like that you know I'll do anything to help just tell me the problem. In tears "really? Any... (blows his nose) anything? " Yes my friend. Okay thanks dog. I want you to share your secret with me. Secret? I have no clue what you're talking about. Tortoise starts crying again. Aww man I really don't like it when people cry don't worry I'll tell you. You're talking about the famine right? Yes! Exactly! (His eyes light up). Dog agrees on a time for them to meet the next day. On the morrow, tortoise arrives one hour before time and dog is not surprised. So dog goes in and brings a tuber of yam for his friend. Tortoise is surprised but a bit happy that at least his food problem for that day is solved. This happens the next day, and the day after that, and happens for weeks and after a while tortoise's curiosity gets the better of him and he starts persuading dog to tell him how he's doing it but dog puts up resistance for a while but tortoise resorts to his crying trick again but this time dog gets angry and even threatens to stop giving tortoise anything. Dog knew his friend would try to monitor him and was always careful. He didn't accept any drink or even food from tortoise who he won't be forced to tell him. If anything at all, tortoise was persistent and wore down dog in the end. So he decided he would show him his secret. They agreed on a meeting time the next day. Early in the morning before dawn two friends met and set out for dogs unending supply of food. After many hours they got to a farm and dog picked up a tuber of yam and was about to be on his way but tortoise reasoned that he couldn't go all the way just for one, so he helped himself to another, and another, and yet another until he could barely move. Dog waited patiently for his greedy friend got a while ago the time persuading him to let them go in time. As soon as they heard movement, dog started running back to the animal kingdom. But tortoise was too weighed down and there's a popular song my people in Yoruba land sing but I never could memorize it because I only understood the first line. Basically tortoise begs dog to wait for him and dog refuses. The owner of the farm caught tortoise and punished him accordingly making him work on his farm and preventing him from going back to his home and family. Thanks for reading guys. I think there'll be one more of this because I wasn't able to tell more than one again. I'll see you tomorrow. (:

A List Of My Favorite Tortoise Stories (2) Hello guys how are you doing? I hope you enjoyed your day? It's a proper work day now I believe - as we're already almost in mid January. I hope you're all doing what you love as it makes life and work a little easier. Take care of yourselves and stay safe my friends. Today is just a continuation of yesterday's writing. I'll be doing more fables. I hope you enjoyed my story yesterday? It was a hilarious story about Mr Tortoise and his greed and why he has a broken shell. Today, I'll probably tell one in which he is not bad, but cunning. Let's get to it. 2) **Tortoise and the Lion** Once upon a time, in a far far away igbo state called Edo was a small tribe called obiinazi. The new king of the of obiinazi was always the most powerful even in the days when his father was king, and his father was extremely powerful. Very few people ever saw his father, but those that saw him testified to the fact that smoke always preceded his arrival anywhere that's why he was called ezeina which means the king of fire. His son, was an entirely different story. His son could do anything short of giving life. As a result of such power, the new king was known as Ezelese literally meaning the king that can do. As soon as Ezelese became king, he met with the animals and told them he was going to stay out of their affairs on the condition that they keep the forest silent. This implied the lion was still king, and the predators could still prey on the weak, but they just needed to do it silently. Now, they are animals, but they aren't stupid. They knew of the Eze's power. There's a proverb among the igbo people that you don't tell a blind man that rain is falling. You didn't need to tell the animals the horrors that would befall the unfortunate ones that broke the law given to them by the Eze. It made things difficult for the predators to get prey because they were used to chasing down prey and roaring to scare them out of hiding and making a lot of noise in the process of hunting. Now the Lion -the most ferocious and egotistical of them all -got tired of trying to sneak up on prey just to eat only for them to run away at the slightest hint of his arrival. He then called a meeting of all the animals. They had to obey since he was still king. He told them his problem and made a strange demand. Now in those days, there was respect. You couldn't disobey a direct order. The lion demanded that the animals bright their children one after the other as food for him to eat once a day. They were supposed to rotate the task. It was the best idea if the peace of the jungle were to be preserved. But they needed to choose someone to start it. They all kept quiet and the tortoise got either tired or bored and volunteered to go first. This surprised and relieved everybody. They were so happy their children would live another day. The next day came, and the tortoise did not show at the appointed time. After a minute, the lion who had been salivating all night started getting angry. He paced up and down. After one hour, he was furious. He kept grumbling to himself "why won't my food be here?" "What's taking him so long to come and feed me" "I'll definitely kill him when I see him!" He threatened all sorts of things he must have thought were worse than what he was already going to do. After six hours, the tortoise finally appeared. He was strolling leisurely to the palace. The lion asked in the most furious tone ever why he came late. The tortoise narrated a story of how an impostor wanted to eat his food and how he had to hide for a long time to evade the impostor. This made the lion even more furious, but he was angry at the impostor now not the tortoise. So he said "after I eat you, you'll take me to the impostor" "no my Lord I can't wait to be your food but I'll be too dead to show him to you if you eat me first" the lion was charmed by the tortoise's humility and reference then he replied "that's okay my loyal subject, take me to this impostor you speak of and we'll see if I still have room for you in my stomach when I'm done with him." The Tortoise bowed and stated leading the way. They weren't to a very remote party of the jungle to where there was a very deep river. The Tortoise then told him to look inside. The lion roared and the impostor (his reflection) roared back. The lion hated his fangs, but his impostor was determined to copy him to the vet last detail. Out of anger, the lion jumped into the river never to be seen again. How you guys enjoyed this one too. I'm not that much of a story teller, but I tried to narrate it the way I remember reading it years ago. Thanks for your support my friends. You're awesome!!!

A List Of My Favorite Tortoise Stories Hello good people of read. How are you? I hope you're staying safe in these trying times. Hope work has started well for those of you that resumed today and hope it's still fun for those that haven't. A bunch of people weren't happy with something about yesterday's post. Please read the post again very well. I believe equal effort should be put in as far as a relationship is concerned. I clearly stated this under the point where I said kindness and thoughtfulness or something like that. Thanks for all your criticisms. I think you all are awesome, and I wouldn't like to write things that'll offend you. I was going to write about things ladies should look for in men, but this whole subject is tricky for dinner of us as I've found, so I guess I'll keep that list to myself. I'll be doing something more fun this time. I'll be telling you stories I found interesting as a child about tortoise. In my country, fables are told every time about the tortoise. He is usually rogue, cunning, tricky and sometimes, just plain wise. Tortoise stories are usually told by the elders to teach children moral lessons. But I like them because they are interesting not because of some lesson someone wants me to learn. Let's get to telling you one or two today. 1) **Why Tortoise has a rough shell / Tortoise and the birds** This one is a classic everyone knows this where I come from. Enjoy. Once upon a time in the animal kingdom, there was famine. It got so bad that parents were considering eating their offspring! Everyone was looking for solutions to their hunger through any means possible. The birds were not left out in the onslaught caused by the famine. So, they decided to go and meet with God in heaven. They spent weeks scheming and preparing. Unfortunately for the birds, tortoise who was know for notoriety noticed that something was up with the birds. Nothing can really slip past tortoise. He always knows everything going on in the animal kingdom and even outside till far far away places. He eventually found out what was happening with the birds and that they were indeed going to heaven to dine. Tortoise approached them and naturally, they refused his request to follow them to heaven. But tortoise who is very cunning to say the least knew that persistence always paid. After hours of begging and pleading each day for a few days, the birds got worn down and finally gave in. There was just one tiny problem now. Tortoise couldn't fly because he wasn't a bird. When asked how he planned to work around that, he said each bird would give him a feather until he could make wings. The appointed day came, and tortoise was so excited. He was pleasant throughout the journey and he didn't misbehave once. He even told them stories of far away lands he had visited. He totally entertained them. When they were half way through their journey, he told them that in done cultures, when one was preparing to meet an important guest, it was traditional to change names. The birds knew tortoise had traveled a lot and knew more cultures than them, so they bought it. They have themselves names like ruby, pearl, gold, silver, sparkle, glow, beauty, etc. At the end, tortoise chose the name "all of you". Of course they found it strange but tortoise was always more than strange to them. They finally got to heaven and the angels found tortoise strange as he was oddly shaped. But he appeared to be their chief spokes person. He answered every question thrown to them and did it with so much confidence and charisma - he could even be their king! After the formalities, the food came and Tortoise asked "who does all these belong to", and the angels said the food belongs to "all of you". Tortoise immediate reminded the birds his name was all of you. He ate all the food and the birds were sorry, sad, angry, and hungry. On the trip down, they started to connect their feathers one after the other. By the time they were done, tortoise was freely falling. He started begging them to take a message to his wife. He told them to tell his wife to bring out all the soft materials like down toilet paper, etc to ease his fall. He asked the hawk and was immediately refused. He pleaded with other birds and was refused every time. But he got to the gentle dove and the dove agreed to deliver his message. But when the dice got to his wife, he delivered the opposite of the message. He told her to bring every hard object in the house. She brought out the hoes, cutlasses, guns and stuff like that. When tortoise was close to the ground, he saw his wife moving things and was happy. By the time he realized what was happening, it was too late. He landed on those hard objects and he almost died. But the mystic of the town -snake- preserved his life but his shell would always be rough, and there was nothing snake could do about that. Hope you guys enjoyed my story. Thanks for always reading and commenting guys. You're awesome.

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A List Of Things To Look Out For In A Woman Hello good people of read. Hope you're fine. It's the beginning of the second week in the new year. I know work resumes for a lot of people who haven't already resumed tomorrow. But I hope the festive air is still hanging around wherever you are. For those in covid dominated countries, I hope you're trying to stay safe. Covid isn't as dangerous in my country as it is in a lot of other countries, and I'm grateful for this. Please guys, just take care of yourself the best way you know how because nobody would do that job better than you. Yesterday, I wrote what you shouldn't want in a woman, and based on what is becoming my tradition, I would write about one or two things you really want to see in a woman. Let's get to it. 1) **Intelligence** This, to me is the real inner beauty (cooked with a few other things though). You do want a girl that everyone would love to listen to. You want a girl that can have a decent conversation with you and won't be just half the time. You want someone who knows about life all round and can contribute to almost any topic brought up. The more intelligent a girl is, the more you want her. This is sort of my golden rule when it comes to girls. 2) **Facial Beauty** This is the second thing you just look out for. How beautiful she has to be totally depends on you. If you see other things in her that can make you stay, then definitely hang on to your girl (especially if that something is high intelligence!). But another way to approach the situation is too have a minimum amount of beauty a girl just have in order for you to even consider other things. Pretty much any choice you make when it comes to beauty is fine with me. Reason being that I understand that you just like what you see, or at least not hate what you see for a relationship to work. I'm lenient with looks also because I know they are not really responsible for how they look, unlike intelligence. I hate it when I girl talks (and even guys) and you just feel like slapping them back into the womb or dumb land where they came from. Also, as part of facial beauty, you can consider the other things men want like the shape and all of that. I guess it's more outer beauty than facial beauty, but you get the point. Just make sure you like what you see. 2) **Good sense of morals** You don't want a girl who is rude and disrespectful. You want someone with good moral upbringing. Someone who always knows the right approach as far as morals go. You really may thing you want -what we call in my country - a slay queen, but trust me, you don't want to marry that type -or even date that type. Decency is one underestimated virtue in our day. Your significant other really had to uphold decency. 3) **Rich Traditional / Cultural Background** Some things are questionable about other cultures. For example, in my traditional culture, we value greeting a lot, so we judge other traditions as rude and disrespectful because they don't greet as much. But what I know is that every culture has its own good sides. Once a woman has incredible cultural roots, she can more than make up for whatever lapses or differences between cultures. It's even better though when two of you have the same culture. This allows both of you to have more common ground and better understanding of what you both want when matters of culture are concerned. If you're from different cultures, it shouldn't be a problem though. Just be patient with each other, and talk about your differences peacefully. Always try to come to a middle ground. 3) **Kindness, thoughtfulness, love and caring** What would you even be doing with someone who doesn't love and care for you? You want someone that would always do thoughtful things for you. Someone who would on every small way show that she loves you. You want someone who won't wait for the big things before showing care. Someone who would be unconditionally kind. Every relationship needs all the love and care it can get. Love from one side alone is never enough. You both have to always put in the same amount of work for the relationship to work out. Let me end my list here guys. I hope we usual that you liked something about my article. Thanks for always reading, commenting, and upvoting. I appreciate my wonderful sponsors too. I see them as tiny little guardians watching over me here on read. I'm also very grateful to my girlfriend whom I know would always put in the same amount of work as me into making us a better pair. You're awesome guys. Thank you all.

(not) A List Of Things To Look Out For In A Woman Hello good people of read. How are you doing? Hope everything is going fine for you? How you spent your weekend having fun? I didn't do much with my weekend. I stayed home and tried to nurse myself back to health. I hope to be better (at least a little) tomorrow. Thank you all for your support and your kind words. You all been a lot to me and you're part of one big rain to live. Yesterday, you learnt a little more about being a better guitarist (I hope). If you're interested in the guitar, or you already okay and would be willing to share ideas, please do let me know. Today, I'll be teaching you how to make sure you have a good girlfriend (like mine). But first, we're going to go through my process of elimination before the actual list. I'm first of all going to tell you the things you don't want to see in a woman before I go ahead and do the main list. Here we go guys. 1) **Aggression** Even in men, we don't want this, but in women, it's even more scary. You don't want someone who will always threaten to beat you up (even more scary is when she actually can lol). You really should watch her approach to matters before you decide to go for her. If she's hot headed, then definitely stay away from her except you're ready for a very rough relationship. 2) **Meanness** Trust me, this is as bad as being aggressive or even worse! Mostly, those that are aggressive can still be nice. But the mean ones, while they may not be aggressive are just bad news. No matter what happens to you, they do not sympathize and are probably even sadistic about it. Again, this is very bad on men, and in women, it's really terrible too. 3) **Promiscuity** This is third on the list because the first two obviously are way way worse. Someone who is promiscuous may just be having a bad relationship, or isn't really satisfied - coitally. I believe that a woman would cheat just for the fun of it is very rare. In my experience, it's men who are more prone to cheating for no just reason. But if it has been proven that a particular woman would cheat no matter the circumstance, definitely remove your shoes so that you can run faster, and run with all your might -run so hard that your heels touch your head. 4) **Inadequate Mental Ability** This is another bad one. Whatever girl you'd date or marry must be able to hold a sentient conversation. She just be able to understand some form of technical content. She must be sophisticated at least to an extent. You want a significant other that you can show to your friends. You don't want a significant other that would always never know how to hold even the simplest conversations. You don't want a slow one that would never get jokes and would bring the mood down every time. This quality is the worst one for me personally. 5) **Not Pleasing To Look At** This one is important to a lot of people. Apart from the content of her brain (inner beauty), you don't want someone you can't just take to a gathering just to show off her beauty, or get shape, or something men always want. I don't rate this one too high because I've found that in not attracted to what's in a woman's head. But I am lucky to have a woman that's able to make the other angels jealous, so I felt I should add this to the list too. If a woman passes the other tests excellently, then definitely go for her regardless of how unpleasing she looks like (do this to the limits you can tolerate. If she's too bad you can not accept her, then don't force yourself.). Thanks for reading guys. I hope you enjoyed my list, or at least learnt something.

How To Become A Better Guitar Player (2) Hello guys. How are you doing? I really do hope you're all fine. The holiday season is ending, and I have work on Monday. I hope you guys love your jobs more than I do my current job? After this month though, I'll quit my job to try to focus more on music and guitar. I'll leave the remote area I'm at and go to town where things are actually happening. I am not quite there yet as far as skill is concerned, but I think I'm at a level where I can make something from the little I've got currently. Yesterday, I have out the singular missy important ingredient in the making of a great guitarist. But this was supposed to be a list, so I dimmed it fit to at least add one or two more items. So today, you are going to be having more of the same. But the way, if you knew about any of the guitarists I mentioned in yesterday's article, please let me know as I think she of them are popular and are even household names (Tommy Emmanuel is a household name in australia). Honestly, what I talked about yesterday was truly the major ingredient if I manage to come up with other things today, they would just be spices to improve on what's already the major building block. Enough quibbling. Let's get to it. 1) **Practice right** Basically, so far, what you guys have got is practice, and do it right. This just goes to show the importance of practice. I'll not talk much about this now, but I'll treat it a little more in my next point. 2) **Be around the right people** The right people in this case is actually other musicians. Preferably, Guitarists. It is in fact when you're with other musicians that you get better ideas of what you're doing wrong in Practice. This point is not one to trifle with especially if you don't have a teacher. I did mention that any other thing I would tell you was just spice, but you try cooking any meal without adding any spice and see if it goes down well. In fact, if you plan to become a professional guitarist, it is when you move with other people (read guitarist), you know what you really want to do. For example, do you want to earn more from live performances? Or do you want to own a studio and lay your guitar on other people's works, or do you want to play in a band? Or do you want to play solo? Do you want to move with a popular musician? You get to know what you want or -my preferred elimination method- what you don't want at the very least. You also learn from other guitarist and add what they teach you to your repertoire. You would be largely influenced by those you move with. If you move with the right people, you would be very motivated to practice. Much of what is tagged "creativity" in my experience is actually just knowledge - knowledge that doesn't come from your natural instincts alone. When you come out as a guitarist, your natural instinct as an individual would define what would be called "your style". When you do anything impressive that's different, they say you're creative, but that's not totally true. You would observe that most of those "creative" people are usually very experienced. They have moved with a lot of people. They have taken a small percentage of a lot of people over time, and it has influenced them in another unique way different from their individual natural uniqueness. The point is this : those you move with are extremely important. If you move with mediocre guitarists, I can't even being myself to describe your date because it's so so horrible! On the other hand, if you move with people that would always be willing to learn, the sky is your beginning. Now time for a cliche motivational type stuff. **YOUR ASSOCIATION DETERMINES YOUR DESTINATION. (Or something like that)** I hope I was able to drive the point home. If your only options are mediocres, refuse it. Don't move with them. Practice and improve on your own. When the time is right, you'll meet the right people. Thanks for reading guys. I hope you learnt something or liked something at least. You guys have been awesome to me, and I appreciate it. Thanks for your support guys. If you have any more guitar questions to ask, please feel free to ask I'll be willing to answer. Also, if you want guitar lessons, that can always be arranged. (: Much love!!!!

(now) A List Of Things To Do To Become A Better Guitarist Hello guys. How are you doing? Hope you're fine. I hope your days have been better than mine. These days, since the relapse, I've found myself taking drugs (prescribed drugs) that have highly sedative contents. I've lost interest in almost everything that used to interest me. This includes food, drinks, games, novels, etc. So I think what I'm trying to do is basically sleep myself to health. I probably should be bothered about this, but the truth is every year for the past four years have been like this. Everything I'm experiencing now is familiar. The cold weather, the euphoria, and the loss of interest in almost everything, the irrational fear that prevents me from even practicing. Everything is familiar. Anyways, the title promised you something. Tips on how to be a better guitar player. Let's get right to it. 1) **Practice At All Times** This is the singular greatest advice anyone can give you. There's no such thing as too much practice. Don't be deceived, every great guitarist became what they are by power of sheer practice. There's no such thing as talent in guitaring, only practice. I'll start mentioning a few familiar names now. I) Jimi Hendrix. This guy to some people is considered the ultimate rockstar. But what you won't know is that he practiced 8 hours every day, and took his guitar wherever he went. I'll throw in a little fun fact here. He had perfect pitch. So the first time he bought a guitar and wanted to tune it, he just walked into the guitar shop, played all the strings, and went home to tune it. Also, he did this because he didn't have money for a tuner, so even Hendrix was broke at some point in his short life. 2) Tommy Emmanuel You never see any records of school in this guy's biography. What we know about him are the stories he tells all the time. When he was six, he heard Chet Atkins play on the radio and he knew chet Atkins was doing everything on one guitar at once. He heard Chet play a song called windy and warm. He went to figure out things for himself and only decided to meet Chet when he was twenty years old!!! He practiced for fourteen good years!!!! And it wasn't until he was around forty years or so that he decided to go everywhere alone with an acoustic guitar as a solo player. 3 George Harrison of The Beatles!!! This guy prescribed till his hands bled. I personally don't think it's achievable based on the fact that at some point when I was starting, I practiced eight to twelve hours a day and my hands would hurt, but would not look like they were anywhere near close to breathing. So this guy basically practiced till the impossible happened! This is the story I'm least sure of. It happened with a beatle, that much in sure of, but I'm just about seventy percent sure it was George Harrison. But the point is still the same. **Practice!!!!** 4 **Every other good guitarist that has amounted to anything!!!** The point is just practice!! The ten thousand hour rule says that to be proficient at anything, do it for ten thousand hours. This is three hours a day for a little over nine years. For guitarists to get to works standard, they usually have put in twenty five thousand hours!!! So guitar requires time, dedication, devotion, passion, and pretty much every other thing that's not your soul! In fact people who got very good have been rumored to have sold their souls to the devil just to get good (you can try checking out a guitarist called Robert Johnson). The guitar is simply that hard!!!

Special thanks to Garethgrey for the sponsorship... I want you to know I'm very grateful... Thanks a lot!!!!

(Not) A List Of Things To Do To Become A Successful Guitarist Hello guys how have you been doing? Hope it's still fun wherever you are? Do take care of yourselves how you know to do. I'm grateful to ask who have renewed their sponsorships. I wish you best of luck in all your endeavors you're all awesome. Today I'll be teaching you what to do to become a successful guitarist... Or would I??? Nah. It's much more fun to tell you what not to do first. If you eliminate all the wrong things, all you have left is right (yes, all puns intended). Let's get to it guys. 1) **Tell yourself you can't do it** You should never ever do this. This is the singular biggest step to failing at playing the guitar or even at anything. Overcoming many challenges in life usually starts with a battle of the mind. The moment you start believing you can't do a thing, then you start failing. If you go into a practice session bearing in mind that you can't accomplish a particular thing, then you would see every normal difficulty as further proof that you're no good. This will discourage you until you start asking yourself "why bother"and after this you fall hopelessly into despair and give up. This is not all there is too this, but I'll need infinite time just to explain everything about telling yourself you can't do something. That being said, just trust me, and don't do this -at least not before trying long enough. If you can hold the guitar, then you can do it. The only people that can say they can't do it are the handicapped, and even they are wrong! So you have no excuse at all. Week had disabled guitarists throughout history. The most notable being Django Reinhardt. You can check him up. 2) **Get sloppy with practice** You should also never do this of you can help it. Nothing is ever too simple. There's no minimum standard, so you must practice every song or technique -anything at all- till you're perfect at it and can deliver it a thousand percent of the time. You must put in diligently your ten thousand hours and more (for a guitarist to reach world class, you may need twenty five thousand hours). Always, always practice with our without a guitar. 3) **Grow fingernails on the left hand** This is so obvious you'd think. But you'd be surprised at how many people try to pull this off. It's like telling an astronaut not to wear just singlet and pants to space! How do you want to fret the strings properly? Please, desist from these kind of acts that could easily get you a knock on the head when I'm around. I'm just joking. I don't knock people, but I get heavily tempted when I feel that are forcing me to state the obvious. 4) **Compare yourself to others** You can do this if you want to die of a heart attack!!! That your friend gets it in one try doesn't mean you're slow. It doesn't even mean he has more talent than you or even that he put in more work. The guitar is so wide, that some people are more attuned to certain aspects. You may get a jazz concept faster than your friend who appears to be a fingerstyle wiz! Sit back, study yourself, practice as much as you can, and focus on your strengths and you passion. Maybe tomorrow, I'll tell you what to do ... Or not...lol... Thanks for reading guys. You're awesome! Much love!

(Now) A List Of My Favorite Food And How To Prepare Them Hello awesome people of read. How have you been? Today I met a namesake ( @Boluwatife ). I think that's pretty cool. There are so many nigerians on this platform and I'm happy not to be alone. Anyways yesterday, I was going to make a recipe of how to prepare spaghetti but I realize I taught you guys how not to prepare it. I don't know if to say I didn't teach you a recipe, or I gave you a recipe of how not to do it. Whatever it is, today, I'm going to do that. I have a wealth of mistakes that would ensure that I either lead you down the right path, or at least (and even more likely) lead you away from the wrong path. Let's dive into this delicacy. 1 **You may wash the spaghetti** If you hate starch that much, you may wash it. Just for you to know I've tried it, I'm going to tell you what's going to happen once you wash it. It brings out so much starch that it almost looks like it's foaming. I'm not usually one that does things or cook for the sake of health benefits. I believe more in eating for pleasure. I can tell you that there's absolutely no difference in taste either you wash the spaghetti or not. But he careful when you're washing it because you may break it, and if you mistakenly break up to one hundredth of the spaghetti, them I recommend you buy another pack and start again (and maybe this time, don't wash it...). 2 **Boil Water** This step is necessary as you don't want your spaghetti to soak in a lot of water before it gets boiled. This is one more reason you probably shouldn't wash your spaghetti. Again, this step in my opinion doesn't do anything to change the taste. In fact, of you're using any reasonably fast gas cooker, you have my blessing to go ahead and cook it without boiling. As I said, the difference isn't that much. 3 **Put The Spaghetti In The Boiling Water** This looks like a simple thing to do, but I had to add it because there is one or two things you should note. I) Don't break the spaghetti II) Use a pot big enough so that you won't break the spaghetti III) don't break the spaghetti IV) in the event that your biggest out pot can't contain the spaghetti at once, you probably should break it once. V) Rule number four is thrash, and so is any rule that says you can break the spaghetti VI) don't break the spaghetti VII) this is the most important rule guys "**DO NOT BREAK THE SPAGHETTI"** Now that I've given six different rules on now Putting the spaghetti on fire, you'll be fine on your own. 4) **wait** Wait till the spaghetti is done. I'll recommend that you watch an episode of friends. When you get to exactly twelve minutes of the video, go and check the spaghetti. If your means of cooking is fast, then you should be done, else go and complete the remaining seen minutes of the episode. 5) **Prepare stew** This is simple. Just mix tomatoes, onions, magi, pepper, and groundnut oil in any order on fire, and you're good to go. If you want me to teach you how I prepare my stew, let me know, and I'll consider teaching you. 6) **Serve the stew on top of the spaghetti** You'd think this was obvious until you see people doing all sorts of weird stuff like serving it in a separate place or by the side of the Spaghetti. If you are one of such people, desist from such violent acts. Spaghetti and stew were meant to be together. Separating them like that is just evil! (I forgive you if you're guilty of this because I know you didn't know it was evil, but now you no longer have an excuse). Thanks for reading guys. You're awesome. Again, the disclaimer. I was joking about some things I said there (I think). Cooking isn't a religion where there are rules or something like that (I hope for your sake this is correct hahaha). If you think I went wrong in any way, I know for certain that I didn't, but interest me with your thoughts. (:

A List Of My Favorite Food And Some Recipes Hello guys how are you today? Before I start anything let me do as I've seen some great users do -let me flex my sponsors. These are the angels watching after me here. I hope you know I'm really grateful. Thanks for you guidance and kindness. I love you all. Today, I'll be doing more of the same. Just making a list. I'm going to tell you some of my favorite food and how to cook them. I'm Nigerian, so some of my ways may seem strange to you. Plus I'm not particularly a good cook. That being said, let's get to it. 1) **Spaghetti** I used to joke as a child that I lived spaghetti because it made people tall (as against rice which I hate with passion). I've always loved spaghetti for some weird reason. I think the most reasonable explanation I've gone up with is that it was unavailable to me in my past life (I'm not joking, this is as reasonable as my explanation gets). Now to cooking it. Before I tell you how to cook it, I'll tell you how not to cook it based on stuff I've tried before. I) Don't add sugar. Don't do this please. Sugar is good, and I'm usually pro sugar despite what the doctors say, but please don't ask it to spaghetti!!! It just doesn't work. Why it doesn't work? I guess there's such a thing as too much of a good thing. I mean... Do the math. Spaghetti is a good thing, sugar is another good thing. Add them together, and wet have too (two) much of a good thing!!! I tried it, and the taste reminded me of when I added sugar to water and dipped bread in it and ate that...!!! II) Don't let it be too hard or too soft. Naturally, I hate soft food. I then decided at some point to eat spaghetti when it was half done. It kept sticking to my teeth and gums. Only strong undying love for spaghetti kept me in the right path (the path that eats spaghetti no matter what). If it's too soft, that's another disaster on it's own. Please don't do this except you have some health issue that requires you to (maybe something along the lines of tooth problems). III) DON'T boil unwashed eggs with spaghetti. I used to do this all the time until I found something that looked like excrement and feathers on the eggs' shells one day. It then made sense to me that my mum was always fastidious about washing her eggs first. I'm extremely lazy, but never again would I put unwashed eggs in my spaghetti! Iv) Don't use a small pot to cook spaghetti. This is the worst idea you can ever come up with. Spaghetti is sweeter when it's long. If you use a small pot, you may not cook the upper part as well as the lower part. This is a well known fact, but you'd be surprised how many people get tempted. Some people even break the spaghetti just to be able to accomplish this, but then you kill the joy of spaghetti as everyone knows sucking the spaghetti from the fork periodically, gives indescribable, and otherworldly joy. This takes me directly to my next point. V) **DON'T BREAK SPAGHETTI** Left to me, this should be somewhere in the bible. Why would you do something so atrocious? Why not just eat rice? Why would you be so destructive and destroy spaghetti for fun loving people like me? I savor every moment with those beautiful long strands. I find it inhumane that someone would want to take that from me. Please whatever other rule you break, don't break this one (and maybe the first and second too). The little pleasures of life matter, but so do big ones like this too! VI) Spaghetti has a standard shape, height, and diameter, do not be deceived! If someone sells something that is tinier than what you're used to, don't buy it. Or better still, do the world a favor by buying it, and burning it!!! Spaghetini is not so m the same thing as spaghetti! They don't even taste alike! Anything different from the standard spaghetti is an SSO (Spaghetti shaped object). And that's a lot like impersonation. You shouldn't support address like that. People who make those things could take your baby from you and give you a statue! Don't support them by buying their products!!! Choose to starve instead and nature would bless you for it...!!! Thanks for reading guys! I'm mostly joking about the hilarious things I said here... ... ... Or am I? (Muah hahahaha)

Many thinks to @bch_lover for the sponsorship... I'm forever grateful... Thanks a lot!!! Much love!!!

Special thanks to the knowledgeable @mictorrani for the sponsorship... I'm very grateful!!! More knowledge to you this year...!!!

My Favorite Yoruba Deities Hello guys how have you been? Hope it's still Christmas lights and bliss with you? Today, I'll tell you about my favorite Yoruba deity. His name was Sango. I'm yoruba by origin and we rever Sango as the god of lightning. As with many myths, the origin of the protagonist is controversial. One myth says that he's the son of Yemaja. In this myth, he burst out of his mother's body and he came with a few others. This happened when she was going to be raped by her son Orugun the second time. It so happened that some people didn't accept this as his true origin story. Some others believed that he was the son of the white clothed god Obatala and Aganju. Obatala was taking a walk when he got to Aganju's river. Aganju refused him passage, so Obatala went back, changed into a woman, and traded her body for passage. The king of Oyo then - Ajaka - was at war with his cousin Olowu of Owu. The king of Owu ordered for the capture of the Alaafin of oyo. In a bid to save the king, Sango was sent for, and after the rescue, Ajaka was exiled, and Sango was crowned king. Sango was so powerful that prior to now, he had gone to look for Aganju and walked in a lake of fire to prove his heritage! When he became king, he had two people that were next in hierarchy. The first was Timi Agbale Olofa-ina who was said to be able to shoot arrows of fire. The second was Gbonka who was just as powerful. Now, the king's wife -oya- trying to prevent the king from being overthrown by his two generals asked that he got rid of them. He told them to go and rule surrounding towns he had conquered, and Timi went to a place called Ede. Gbonka stayed back. The king then sent Gbonka to capture Timi. When they came back, Sango -the Alaafin of Oyo-trying to get rid of them asked them to fight again as he believed the match in Ede was staged. They did, and Gbonka defeated Timi. The king ordered Gbonka burnt and he was. But after three days, Gbonka appeared again and asked that the king vacate the throne. Sango then asked his wife Oya for his "Edun Ara" (one of his charms). But he found menstrual blood on it and he was infuriated. In his anger, he decided to go out and reaffirm the potency of his lightning powers. He went to the top of a rock facing the palace and summoned so much lightning that he burnt down the whole palace. He was remorseful and decided to leave Oyo. His royal cult followed him trying to convince him to stay, but he didn't listen. After a lot of persuasion, some of the cult left him at a place called koso. They ended up spreading the rumor that he hung himself. The ones who stayed with him one the truth. Gbonka appeared but Sango was too sad for confrontation and decided to disappear into think air. As soon as he disappeared, he was seen in the sky in flaming fire, striking at Gbonka, destroying him with lightning. Also, he visited everyone saying he hung himself. He didn't stop until his heart was content. So to appease him, he became known as "Oba Olukoso" or "Obakoso". This means the god that didn't hang. When a true yoruba man sees lightning in the sky, he shudders in reverential fear of Sango. Other gods worthy of mention are Obatala (very associated with creation), Esu (the god of mischief), Ogun (the god of iron) Osun, Oba, and Oya (the goddess wives of Sango). I believe that Sango is still one of the most worshipped deities ever. He isn't associated with omniscience or so those other crazy things associated with the Abrahamic religions'God, but he was at least near omnipotent. There wasn't really why defined limit to what he could or couldn't do. I'll probably talk about another yoruba good tomorrow. I hope you guys enjoyed reading this story as much as I loved telling it. I dedicate this writing to @Theblackdoll .I hope you liked the story. Cheers.

(now) A List Of My Favorite Tech Gadgets Hello guys. How are you? Hope you're enjoying this festive season? I'm curious about how a lot of you spent your holiday season, majorly because you're from different countries as me. In my country, it's not so much of a big deal especially in my state because I'm from a really poor country. Most people lived their normal lives just trying to get what they would eat that day. Anyways let's get to what I have for you today. I'll go over some gadgets with you that I personally favor and either have used, or would like to use. 1) **Headphones/earpiece/speakers:** I love music and much of my life for music came from just listening to it through these various channels. I'm talking about portable ones (as against commercial speakers for public address or something like that). I can't claim to have used any good speakers or earphones as I'm not very rich, but the idea of portable bluetooth speakers or headsets is very fascinating to me. I hope to one day have enough money to use popular good speakers and headsets like beat by dray or others in the class, but until then, I think the cheaper ones are just fine too as long as they don't make my ears bleed. (: 2 **Guitar effect / guitar pedal** This is one I've never used. It is a prerequisite even over here to have a guitar effect before you can follow a musician out, but I don't have which is why I can't get a lot of shows for now. Talking about this makes me sad because I always remember how I am discriminated against. They don't even look at what I can do before telling me they can't pick me. They simply ask do you have an effect? And once I answer "no" I know I'm not going to be taken seriously. :( If you don't know what an effect is, then you should check out any metal music or hard core rock. The different tones on the guitar are mainly a function of what the effect is set to produce, so it's a nice little tool for a guitarist. 3 **Guitar Amp** Guitar amplifiers are just awesome to have!!! Imagine playing your electric guitar without any form of amplification. It's going to be so boring as you won't hear yourself, and the techniques you can master are very limited without the sound of the amp. This has been my fate anytime I practice with the electric guitar. That's one major reason I'm not a very proficient electric guitar player (unlike the acoustic). Guitar amps could replace effects in a concert. But the difference is that you have many amp sounds on one effect. So if I have money, I'd go for the effect at the moment. A manageable effect costs about seventy thousand naira (about a hundred and thirty dollars or so). In my country, that's a really really big deal. I'm grateful to my sponsors because seeing them gives me hope of acceptance in the larger world. I'm really grateful. You mean the world to me!

Special thanks to @Abubakar450 for the sponsorship!!! You're awesome... Much love...

Special thanks to @lucifer01 for renting the sponsorship... I'm really grateful...!!!

Hoping For The Best In the New Year (very random thoughts too) Hello guys. Hope you're doing well? It's been one hell of a terrible year for me if I'm not to lie. I'm happy to be out of it. But unfortunately, I didn't get out without it trying to snuff all the happiness from me. My guitar got broken on the very last day of 2021. :( This alone would not have been enough to make the year decisively bad, but I had lost a guitar early by forgetting it in a cab. I normally don't take cabs, but that day was June 12 and I think and there was some sort of danger in the country or at least in the state I am. On that day, there were no bikes moving and taxis were very scarce too, so I hopped on the first one I saw. He asked me to put my guitar in the boot and I did and because I wasn't used to it, I forgot. My girlfriend got another one for me and when I decided that one wasn't good enough because it wasn't exactly what I ordered for, she got me another guitar with a bag which in total was eighty thousand naira. Which is a lot to me. That's considered an okay salary in the state I work in, and she gave it to me just like that. She's always been an angel and she proved it by immediately paying again for another guitar just like the last one now that I broke the former eighty thousand naira guitar. But even though she's saying I don't have to pay back, I have to try my best to pay. To put things in perspective, I earn twenty thousand naira a month from the school I teach, and that's barely enough to transport me not to talk of feed me! I really am grateful to readcash because it is one ray of hope. I'm not lying when I say this platform has saved me from death by hunger two times now. The second time, I hadn't tasted anything remotely like food in two days and all I had was Bch from readcash from which I ended up withdrawing for food. And after that, I currently have fifty dollars from readcash. This is the most that I've ever had as any form of "savings" in my life. Before readcash I was always dead broke, but the platform has really fine as a ray of hope to me. I hope to be able to give back a to the community like some friends I look up to one this great platform. Life is generally hard, and even much more in africa. The creator of this platform might as well be one of the ancient gods spoken of in the myths that came to help man in times of need. I'm forever grateful to Mr @MarcDeMesel for creating this great platform and giving poor people like me hope in life. You're more than awesome, and I hope that the new year would bring you close to achieving all the goals you've set for yourself! If there's a god up, I hope he grants you all your wishes and heart desires!!! You're more than awesome!!! I thank also all my readers again and I want you to know that I'm forever grateful to you for being nice and kind towards me. I love you all, thanks for being your usual kind selves. Please take care of yourself as you know to do best, and I wish us all more luck then I had in 2021. Cheers to a better year for us all friends. I also have to say I look forward to more of your guidance as I'm still relatively new. I'll live to improve as an author and as a person. Thanks for always being there for me guys. I appreciate all the reading, liking, commenting, and upvoting. You're the best! I called this article hoping for the best because I'm trying to take on a slightly more positive attitude to life. I'm still realistic about my expectations though. So I won't be too disappointed by mishaps. Thanks for reading this article again. P.S. one dollar equals 570 naira just in case you were wondering.

(not) A List Of My Favorite Tech Gadgets Hello guys. How are you today? It's been festive for you this season and I can feel it in the atmosphere here on read. As it is a festive season and one particularly associated with being grateful (we don't have a Thanksgiving here so this is as close as it gets), before I get into today's topic, I'd like to mention a few things. Firstly, I'm grateful to @Kristofferquincy for introducing me to this awesome platform. He, just out of the kindness in his heart just decided to introduce me to this great platform where we write and earn. He walked me through everything I know and encouraged me in my early days. I know I'm still relatively new here, but it feels like I've been here for long majorly because I've found acceptance from awesome people like @Lucifer01 , and extremely caring people like @Theblackdoll , and wise, knowledgeable people like @Mictorrani , and great friends like @Ellen.he . I'm grateful beyond words to you guys, you're awesome. One honorable mention would be @Pantera . For reasons beyond me, he just seems to stand out. He posesses incredible knowledge about cryptocurrency related issues that he just obviously stands out. Even when some of his articles are complex, you still get what his main point is, and this is why I appreciate him as a very remarkable writer. You read his articles and you just fall in love with bitcoincash no matter what you do or don't understand. To be honest, it's because he believes in it with a contagious conviction, that I have come to accept it as a more than equal to any other crypto out there. My first crypto I'll ever own is Bch, and I'm proud of it, thanks to Mr Pantera. I look forward to more beginner centered posts from him as he did recently but whenever I'm not getting that, I'll always be thrilled to read his article as an art enthusiast appreciates the artist's work. I'd like to say more about some people I've mentioned before. First is @Mictorrani . Knowledge is something I appreciate so much, and my man can keep spewing interesting facts about almost any topic. Just yesterday, I still see him do the same about Alfred Nobel!!! Mr Mictoranni is the only normal person I know that has drawn a chess god. In a simultaneous exhibition, Karpov at his prime defeated all fifty opponents except one, and this one exception was Mictoranni!!! It just shows high intelligence from this man. For those that don't understand, drawing Karpov is the equivalent being compared to Einstein in science, and Davinci in art or Tomas Grey in literature or Chet Atkins in guitar. I use as many comparisons just so more people can get the gravity of this accomplishment! I openly acknowledge Mr @Mictorrani as one of the smartest people on the planet!!!! Next is @Lucifer01 . Well, you can tell from my name that he's my favorite devil!!! And I can't mention him without his friend @Mazekin . They are awesome, and always support me. Lucifer told me when I started that he was there for me, and he assured me everything would be fine. And I'm doing fairly well now. Lucifer you're the best!!!! Then, there's my very good readcash friend. My friend @Ellen.he . She's always so nice in the comments. She has a cool husband that likes sit coms and she reads my articles to him (Please friend Ellen help me say hi). If you know her, then you'll know what I'm saying is true. I appreciate you my friend!!! Also, there's @Theblackdoll . She's just as sweet as they get!!! She's so nice that she can give anything to anyone. When I have problems, she's the one that puts my mind at rest. She's a really nice person and here friends and family are lucky to have her!!! Next, there's a friend of mine that's new here and she's been so sweet to me in the comments. She's really cool as she's able to relate to almost any topic. Her name is @Daria . You guys should definitely check out her articles as she writes well too. I really thought this would be a list of my favorite tech Gadgets, but there's so much to be grateful for. Maybe I'll do the actual list tomorrow (I just added the "not" to the front of the topic now). Honorable mentions: @BCH-lover @Jehoshaphat @GarrethGrey07 and my other sponsors. They are really nice people who sponsor me even when we've never met before. I'm really grateful!!!! Thanks and thanks a million times!!!

My Favorite Success Tips 2 Hello guys how are you doing today. How you're fine? I went for an all night program and I was barely paid so I'm not really fine. I was given two thousand give hundred naira which is less than five dollars. That could barely transport me!!! But I'm happy I have you people that would always support me no matter what... Also, there's my girlfriend that said the nicest thing to me today, and I'm just totally totally extremely lucky to have her. To today's post. I'll continue my list of success tips that just sound interesting to me. I'll pick off from where I stopped yesterday. 1 **The Law Of Insanity** I refer to it as a law simply because Einstein himself stated it. He said "insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result". Despite all you may have heard of never giving up, with every trial, something has to be different. You have to learn from your unsuccessful trials and change something in your next trial. This last is kind of obvious once stated. Just imagine that Thomas Edison kept trying more than a hundred times to make the light bulb the exact same way. If you saw him personally, I'm sure you'd tell him point blank that he was an insane ne'er do good because it's obvious that you have to change something to get the bulb to light. Speaking of Edison, one thing I know about him was that he was optimistic, and while it's never stated expressly anywhere, you just know he was always doing something different. There was a story about him I once read. One of his buildings was burning, and his child was beside him feeling bad about it, and he chastised the child telling him not to cry and go and call his mum to watch because that was going to be the last time any of their buildings got burned down like that. Edison was always looking for the best approach. At some point, he reject alternating current because it threatened to send his direct current out of the market. He would do horrible things publicly with alternating current (an example was electrocuting an elephant publicly. Tesla squirms everytime he hears about this in his grave till date! Lol) just to show alternating current was "evil". But later, he would adopt AC so much condemned publicly. Even his hated of something didn't stop him from trying out of that was the only thing he needed to change to make hardway. 2 **Sleep (don't!!!)** I am not making a really perfect list mind you. I'm only writing stuff I think are interesting, so if you don't agree with shutting here, definitely don't follow it as it's probably not right. About sleep, did you know if you sleep 8 hours a day, at the end of 60 years, you'll have slept for twenty years? Just imagine that!!! I just don't find it interesting learning that I'm sleeping away all my life! Also, if you have a dream (having a dream is very key to success as you must be trying to succeed at something!!!), You should be up everytime thinking of ways to achieve it. This is why they say dreams are not what you see when you sleep, rather, they are things that keep you awake at night. Don't sleep (except your Doctor tells you you specially need it). Stay up at night and think, read, play games even... Just keep your brain busy and avoid wasting your life on a bed. Lol. 3 **Have fun** Whine trying to succeed, make sure you're having fun. Do what you like doing as long as it's not drugs, or smoking or drinking or stuff like that. Have responsible fun. The best success is succeeding at something you love doing. For example now, I love the guitar, and succeeding in that field is going to make me feel like a double winner. Thanks for reading guys. I hope you have a nice day. Happy holidays. Stay safe, and please take care of yourselves for me. Much love!!!

My Favorite Success Tips Hello guys. How are you doing today? Hope you're not too stressed from all the celebration? I have never been a fan of celebrating anything partly because I'm usually too lazy, and I don't believe in doing anything that makes me work on ways I'd rather not. In this case, I'm thinking asking the lines of house chores line washing dishes and preparing for and stuff like that. People who celebrate things are really really nice people. They make everyone happy at their expense. People come, people eat, and people go not thinking about who cooked the food or will wash the dishes after they leave. This kind of thinking also makes me reject did almost everywhere I go. I usually genuinely feel for those who have to work to make me comfortable. I'm taking this time to acknowledge you happy people that have so much happiness in your, that you devote your very own time to make people happy. You're awesome, and I appreciate you on behalf of your guests. We must remember what is probably the most useful tip I've ever given you here. Remember that in all that you will do in life, your number one priority should be to stay away from Lords mobile, or any game from igg... Lol. Now, to today's post. I'm going to give you my favorite success tips from all my years old experience. 1 **Time And Season** This is one of my favorite concepts when talking about making it in life. No matter what rules you have followed, time and season must happen for you to make it. You simply can't make it without the right opportunities. Your opportunities would come, and you have to take -in many cases- drastic actions at time that would make or mar you. If you'll be able to identify these moments is another issue entirely, but they would always come, and your life depends on your taking one or two of said opportunities. I would say a few things about those opportunities those. First, they would come time and time again despite the popular lie that opportunities come once. The best explanation I found for them is something like this. The person compared opportunities to a train station. Trains would come and go, but you must always be prepared to hop in one. Next, there's no real rule or guide that helps you identify them. They are different for different people and professions. But I have good news for half the people out there. I think what I've found is you have to take the reins and always do things in faith. Chances are that very soon, you'll make the same move you've always made and when time and season happen for you, that old thing you always did would take on an entirely new look and you'll get propelled by seemingly nothing new. Don't be afraid to make bold decisions especially not because people would laugh. Majority of those laughing aren't much better, so they really don't matter. If they mattered, they'd help you, and not laugh at you. 2 **Redefining success** When you read stories of people like Abraham Lincoln who failed many times, or similar stories about people like Thomas Edison, it kind of makes sense to redefine success. The best of such redefinition was by Einstein or Churchill I'm not so sure, but it goes thus. "Success is the ability to move from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm". Basically, you only truly fail when you fall to keep trying. As long as you have in there and don't lose focus on why you started trying in the first place, you're classified by Einstein (or Churchill) as a success. No matter what those around you see, think, or say, your attitude is really what defines you as either success or failure. There's no big revelation to this idea. All I think you have to know is this. Success or failure is an identity just like being a dog, man, or a pig. If a sheep falls in the mud, it doesn't make it a pig. No matter how many times or falls, it simply has to pick itself up and continue life. It's identity doesn't change. This is the case with being a failure or a success. Of you give up everytime, you're a perpetual failure, and on the other hand, of you never give up, you're a perpetual success. I'll continue tomorrow maybe... If I do, I'll start with what I call the last of insanity... Stay frosty guys. Hope you found these tips useful in some way, or at least interesting. Thanks for commenting and stuff... Much love guys!!!!

My Favorite Games Hello guys. Hope you're doing well? I hope you're still in a festive mood. I've been doing my share of celebration despite my sickness. I've taken my fair share of yoghurt and ice cream even today. I ended up staying in a family house for the night, but I hope to be back to my crib tomorrow or next. If I'm to be honest, I probably needed to stay around people because I really wasn't feeling good, so despite my reserved feelings for everything home, it probably wasn't the worst of ideas. Today, I bring you a list of games I still love and play. They are all played on my rather low end phone, so they would definitely play on yours if you're interested. Let's dive into it. 1) **Not Lord's mobile** Whatever you do, don't play this game. It's supposed to be my favorite because it's the one that wakes me up in the morning, and I spend an insane amount of time in it, but I believe the makers are just short of overly greedy!!! You don't need any real skill to play if you have money. Those dominating the game are practically just slapping each other around with their wallets. The rules of the game are simple. 1 get lots of money 2 put in your credit card details 3 dominate for as long as you're boxed up financially!!! There are in game characters that could easily cost 5ok dollars each to level up. And there are people with 3 of those characters!!!! A more preferable option for real strategy games would be the other games on the list. Lord's mobile is so bad that they caught me with wrong advertising. I simply was naive in that I didn't believe at the time that people would advertise for a game what's not even in the game at all!!! After the advertisement, the game opens with a movie that again, has buying to do with the gameplay, and after this point, your hooked for a while at least. Why I still play this game??? I honestly have no idea!! Just take my warning and don't play the game. 2 **Clash Royale** Now, this is a fine game!!! You can pay to play, but it's not a big deal as you don't get blown away by other people's wallets. You could get specific characters faster with your money, but others still get it and would eventually beat you even without said cards. I've been playing this game since about 2016 or so. It's a game you should play for life if you can. Long live supercell!!! Let me describe a bit what the game is about. You get cards as it's a card game. You need cards of the same nature too level up the cards for example, if you need to level up a level one giant, you need two level one giant cards, and a few coins. You need more cards and more coins the higher the level gets. Cards and gold can be gotten from boxes which you get from matches you win. Next, you pick a deck of 8 cards. You have to understand how each card behaves in a battle situation, so as to come up with a strategy and choose cards that work well together. One major factor that'll determine your deck is something called the average elixir cost. Your maximum amount of elixer per time is ten elixers. If you have less than that, your elixer guage fills slowly and different cards have different elixer counts. You put down cards from four you can see. The deck you select is randomized so that you could see any four cards first, and then you see any random card next after you put down each one until you've seen all the cards in your deck after which the pattern becomes constant for each match. I realize it may sound complex now, but it really isn't. This game is really really awesome. It's a must play if you like games. The first game is on the list because it consumes a lot of my time. But I still advice not to play except you want to send all your money to igg... Happy holidays guys. Stay frosty.

My Favorite Relationship Hello guys. Compliments of the season. Hope things are still very fun with you? Hope you celebrated the holiday to the fullest because you're wonderful, and your deserve to? Anyone who says otherwise obviously doesn't know what he's talking about. You guys are awesome, and deserve the best. Today, I'm be talking about something personal, and I hope you won't be too bored. I'll be telling you about my current relationship because it's the best ever!!! I've been in three relationships in total, and my current one is just more than awesome! When a relationship is good, you would always be able to attribute the smooth sailing to someone in the relationship, and as there are just two of us in it, you should already know my partner is awesome. This is the first time I'm dating someone from outside my tribe, but I've not really had any reason to regret it. She's way way kinder than any girl in my tribe, or in the world for that matter. She is sad when I'm sick, injured, or discomforted in any way. She's sent her last penny to me on several occasions now. She's extremely caring and really humane. One other thing I always place priority on is intelligence. My girlfriend is more knowledgeable and much more intelligent than I am. I think she knows too many sad stories though, but it still counts as knowledge for her. She's also really smart, and able to come up with solutions to almost any problems. Another thing I live about her is that she's stylish, and because she's getting another tribe, sometimes, her style would pass off as exotic to me. She's the tallest girl I've dated, and this is the perfect height for me. She's not so freakishly tall that she's intimidating, but just the perfect height. She has the most beautiful smile in the world too! Have you seen those days where the world looks dull and boring? That's a phenomenon that occurs when my girlfriend has been too sick, stressed out tired to smile. So, my girlfriend happy is good for the earth and people around her. She's very cheerful. Because she's intelligent, no joke gets past her. She has better sense of humor than me, and my sugar of humor is not too be taken lightly. I'm even the spoil sport in the relationship. :( She's extremely adventurous. She doesn't mind mountain climbing and stuff like that even though I think it's a bit dangerous for girls. She thinks I'm sexist at times, but I just can't for the life of me see what's wrong in saying that I see a difference between two physiologies in the human species, and that one isn't as suited for some particular activities as much as the other. In all, she's the best girlfriend anyone can ever ask for, and I'm extremely lucky to have her. The day I met her is always going to be remembered fondly. She's as perfect as a human being can be. She's flawed in her own beautiful way too, but she's so much more perfect than flawed. I never pray for much, but I pray everyday that our relationship would last forever because that would surely make me happy forever. Feel free to let me know what qualities you like about your partners that make you stay with them. Thanks for reading and commenting and upvoting guys. I appreciate your support in every single way you show it. You can be sure that nothing gets past me. Thanks a lot guys. You really are the best!!! Special shout out to @Theblackdoll for being there for me whenever I need help. I pray you become very wealthy enough to help more people around you... You're highly appreciated...

My Favorite Bible Stories (3) Hello guys. How are you today? How was Christmas yesterday? Hope you celebrated with your families? I am well aware that a lot of happening so over the world, but please try to focus on the positive side of things. If it matters to you, then please always remember that I care about you. Today, I bring you more of the same. It won't do to just use a few stories from thousands. I keep remembering now stories and I just feel I should write more bible stories. Also, these stories are interesting. Today, I remembered a story about destiny, and how it can't be stopped in any way. This is a story of jealousy and envy (two powerful emotions in themselves) that couldn't stop destiny that was written in stone. Today I bring you the story of Joseph the dreamer (as we called him in my younger days). **1 Joseph** Have you ever had an annoying younger brother who was his dad's favorite? That was Joseph. He was the eleventh son of twelve. His mother had only one other and his name was Benjamin. Joseph was known in my younger days as the dreamer for a very good reason. He used to have these dreams that were very suggestive of him becoming ruler over his house. I'll get back to that. First, I must mention that his dad lives him so much, he didn't even bother to hide it. His dad bought him a coat of many colors. Only God (and maybe his dad) knows what his dad was thinking because this only made his brothers green with murderous envy. Now back to the dream issue. You now know that his brothers hated his guts and we jealous of him. Apparently, the way to make it worse is too have good dreams, and say it out loud. His first dream... They were all in the field gathering sheaves and all of a sudden, all the other sheaves started bowing to his own. His second dream was eerily similar... The sun, the moon, and eleven stars just had nothing better to do that start bowing to him. (Guys I can't make this up. It's in the bible. I told you it's not just a boring book. I finished it as a child, and I'm not a churchy person!!!) Anyways, his brothers more than hated him at this point. His dad blundered and sent him to give good to his brothers in the fields one fateful day, and he gullibly obliged. He even put on his favorite coat of many colors!!! When his brothers saw him from afar, they were going to kill him. But the oldest one got brilliant and creative. He decided it was better they sold him as a slave. The oldest one was called Ruben. It was this same sort of creativity that made him lie with his dad's wife later, but this isn't his story. Back to Joseph... As soon as he got near enough they grabbed him violently, took his cloth, and rubbed it in the blood of one of the sheep, to lend credence to the story that a wild animal killed him, and they threw Joseph in a well. After a while, they sold him to ishmaelites for 20 shekels or something like that. His dad of course was sad. Poor Israel. Joseph on the other hand was the lucky one, so naturally, his luck rubbed off on his master, and everything that was committed to the hands of Joseph, was more than successful. In no time, he sort of became the unofficial master of the house. He ran things so smoothly, it didn't really matter what the master would have wanted. But this won't have been a good story if it ended here. The woman of the house soon decided her husband wasn't good enough again, and she wanted to have Joseph. But Joseph was too morally upright to succumb to her wiles. She then, in the ultimate feminine evil decided if she couldn't have him, her husband couldn't also, so she framed him and tried to make it look like he tried to have his way with her. Joseph was sent to prison and this was where things got really fun. The baker and the cup bearer were in the prison for some reason, and they both had dreams, and Joseph was a master of dreams at this point. He still had yet to master the subtle art of keeping his mouth shut though (this proved to be a good thing in the long long run though). He interpreted their dreams and true to what he said, the baker was beheaded on the third day, while the cup bearer was set free. He did ask the cup bearer to remember him in the future, but who actually remembers foreign strangers met in prison? One day though, the king had dreams he couldn't interprete, and I believe you see where this is going? Yes our main man Joe was the only one up to the task, and it got him out of prison. He was able to save Egypt from famine, and have enough stored up to feed the rest of the known world till the point that his old family that you've almost forgotten about came to buy food from him, and ended up bowing to him because they couldn't even recognize him, nor were they able to imagine he'd still be alive!!! That's the end of my telling of the story. The story is just the beginning of how Israel because slaves to Egypt, but maybe I'll tell that sometime later. Hope you guys enjoyed my story. Thanks for always reading, upvoting, and commenting!!! You're awesome!

My Favorite Bible Stories 2 Hello guys. Good morning. How was your night? I'm happy today because I thought I lost something, and ended up not losing it. I'll continue with the series of bible stories I fancy today. Most bible stories are interesting, so the list is in no particular order. Needless to say that the most thrilling ones may be the way stories, but I love the other stories too. They inspire different kinds of feelings. **1) The Story Of Jesus** This is the obvious choice because of the season. This story is intriguing because of all the twists in it. First, we were expecting a child (a savior) to be born, and yes, God did indeed send a child, but he was born without the assistance of a man. It even says in the bible that Joseph, being a just man wanted to divorce Mary privately, but an angel had to interfere. After jesus was born, they were warned by an angel to take the child away to Egypt to hide from Herod the king. But before then, wise men had come to give gifts that'll have spiritual significance. They brought gold, frankincense, and myrrh signifying his kindly, judicial, and priestly functions. When jesus came back from Egypt, it was on the day of passover and his parents lost him in the midst of the crowd. He left his parents to go into the temple to listen to people talk about God. And when his parents found him, he claimed he was doing his father's business. At this time, he was twelve. The next time he comes into the picture is when he's thirty years old. He goes to be baptized by John the baptist, and the heavens open up and declare "this is my beloved son in whom I'm well pleased". This is very strange for that period. Jesus from there went into the wilderness to fast for forty straight days at the end of which the devil came to tempt him. He rebuked the devil in spectacular fashion ever single time. My Favorite one was the first. The devil asked him to turn stone to bread which was the perfect temptation seeing as he hadn't eaten for forty good days! Jesus like boss just calmly replied that "man shall not live by bread alone, but but every word that comes out of the mouth of God". This was always too cool for me not to love because it wouldn't have been out of place for Jesus to go "how dare you try to tempt me with food at this time!!...” or something along those lines... He wasn't even angry at all, but kept resisting the devil with deep deep scriptures. Jesus was awesome!!! The israelites didn't ask find him so though. You see, Israel was a warring country, and they were at this time colonized by the Romans, so it made sense that they wanted a warrior savior, but Jesus wasn't anything close to being a warrior. Lol. He came to save them in another way. He picked disciples asking the way, showed the power of God through miracles for over two years, and fulfilled all prophesy concerning him. He performed all manners of miracles. He healed the sick, raised the dead, opened the eyes of the blind, and even did miracles without knowing willing it as in the case of the woman with the issue of blood who touched him. Undoubtedly, he was the most powerful man to every walk the face of the earth. It may be utter blasphemy, but everytime I think of the gospel according to Biff. Even throughout the time of writing this story, I've been thinking about it all the way... Lol... If you've not read that book by Moore Christopher, then you should consider getting it!!! It's hilarious. It tells a hilarious version of Jesus's childhood. And explains what Jesus did with his life before he was thirty. It explains that he went all over the world meeting different religions and cultures, learning their ways, and getting their powers...lol... Really blasphemously hilarious book. Anyways, Jesus would eventually be betrayed by one of his disciples and he would let himself be killed in a manner they would cleanse the world of sin. I personally would have preferred that he came as a warrior... You know... Like Achilles, or Hercules, or like the ancient greek heroes, but what do I know? Jesus's stories make for good reads. He was usually cryptic a lot of times preferring to tell parables. But I think he was a fun person that loved God, heaven, children, miracles, riddles, and other holy fun stuff. I said holy so that you don't think stuff asking the lines of alcohol and clubs. Anyways, this is my summary of Jesus's story. Merry Xmas guys. Be fun like Jesus was. Eat cakes and bread and non alcoholic wine because Jesus sure wasn't a drunk. If you can't do miracles like Jesus, then maybe compensate by learning done magic tricks. Have fun guys. (:

My Favorite Bible Stories Hello guys. Hope you're doing very fine. I'm still not feeling well, so I apologize for not being as active as I normally would. I have just one dose of my drugs left, so I may run some tests today to see what's wrong. Please guys, don't self medicate like me. I'm only doing it because I'm in africa and we're generally poor here. :( As you guys know, I love fiction and fantasy. When I was small the very first book I read for stories was the Bible. It had lots of interesting stories I liked. Today, I'm going to share them as I remember them. It's been really really long since I read the Bible, so please best with me on the inaccuracies. Enjoy. **1) David's Mighty Men** In the bible, David was a really great king, and he was described as a man after God's heart. He came into the picture when a giant called Goliath was tormenting the children of Israel. David took his sling and give smooth stones and defeated the giant and liberated Israel. That time, Saul was king. Saul made a bunch of attempts on David's life but since God was on his side, Saul failed every time. In the end, Saul fell in battle and David became king of Israel. Now, David inspired such loyalty from Israel, that you could almost be sure that anyone worth anything wanted to work with him. There was a portion of the bible I loved that was dedicated to talking about David's Mighty Men. The first story I remember was about one mighty man that feel in a well and was trapped with a lion and he was strong enough to replicate Samson's trick and Kim the lion with his bare hands. There were three of the mighty Men with David once, and there was no water around and King David was thirsty. The three of the mighty men set out to look for water for him and when they got to a well, they meet a garrison of philistines and they killed all of them. They then took the water back to David and he poured it on the floor as an offering to God because it was drawn with bloodshed. There was one other time King David was growing old, but he still went to war with his men. They had often tried to tell him to stay home, but he didn't listen. On this fateful day, he was almost killed on the battle field and his mighty men saved him and made him swear before God that he wasn't going to fight any war again. **2) David And Bathsheba** So, the israelites were a warring people. Always in one war or another. But David at this point didn't go to war with them but stayed at home. He was at the top of his house when he saw a beautiful woman bathing, and he sent for her. He lay with her and had her husband killed. She had a son for him and the son fell very sick. David out sack clothes, okay on the floor all day, fasted and prayed, but to no avail. Eventually, the son died, and David bathed, wore good clothes and are very well. His men marveled at this and asked him about his behavior. He explained to them that when the boy was alive, there was hope of healing, but when he died, there was nothing more that could be done. Eventually, Bathsheba would give birth to another son for him and God would favor that one above other children. Bathsheba did give birth to Solomon who would succeed David. **3) King Solomon's Wisdom** After David died, Solomon became king. One night, he had a dream where God asked him what he wanted and he chose wisdom. One popular story I liked as a child went like this. Two women had babies and they lived together. One slept on her baby and killed it and then exchanged gets with the other woman's. On waking up, the other woman knew what had happened as mother's would always know their children. They took the matter to the king's court. Immediately, king Solomon ordered for a sword, and said he was going to divide the baby into two and give each of them a part. The woman who had killed her baby was in support but the owner of the child said no, and was willing to give the child to the other woman of it would mean her baby lived and Solomon handed the baby to the rightful owner. In the end, Solomon would accept strange gods and people would reason that if someone as wise as that was doing it, then it was okay, and the chosen of Israel too would go astray. The Bible is filled with many interesting stories. It's always a nice read. I find some books boring though (like songs of solomon), but there are so many other interesting books. Tomorrow, I may share more interesting bible stories. Thanks for reading guys. You're awesome!!!

My Favorite Musicians Hello guys how are you doing? Hope you're doing better than me because I'm writing from the sick bed. I've not been feeling fine since yesterday. My head aches and it's been long since I felt this weak. I wish my girlfriend were here because she knows how to take care of me best. But I've gotten drugs and I only hope I'll be fine. I opened the writing page this morning, and I was a little blank maybe because of the illness, but it never happens to me that I don't know what to write. But it came to me slowly, and in the end, I decided to write something related to my passion. Today I bring you a list of my favorite guitarists and little stories about some of them. This list is in no particular order as they are all guitar beasts. If you have a favorite guitarist feel free to say guys. I hope I'll know them or at least their bands. **1) Tommy Emanuel** This guy is an absolute guitar demon!!!! When he plays, he sounds like multiple instruments at once. When he goes for concerts, he goes solo. He doesn't need a piano, out a bass guitar, or a rythm. Tommy is everything all by himself at the same time. I don't know if any of you is from Australia and can help me confirm in the comments that he's indeed a house hold name over there. He goes all over the world to play, and always takes business class. He's simply more than comfortable as far as finances are concerned. When he was six years old, he heard a great Guitarist by the name of Chet Atkins play. He told his dad that he knew the man was doing everything at once but his dad told him no that it was a recording trick. But Tommy was convinced Chet was doing it all at once, so he went home and wouldn't rest until he had mastered the style. Initially, he was using diverging called a flat pick to play fingerstyle (As far as I can tell, he was living in a remote area). He had never seen a thumb pick. In fact, at some point in his life, he had never seen a bass guitar. The first time he went for a competition (I think it was), he saw the bass and was laughing at the person carrying it with brother. They were wondering why it had four strings and how those ones were going to play as good as them. When he grew older he bought a Chet Atkins cd and in the back he saw the thumb pick and that was when it hit him!!! Up till then he had been doing it the hard way, but that was a turning point for his playing. Because he learnt a lot with his flat pick, he developed a unique brand of hybrid picking that's he still uses in a lot of his compositions. He's a very good bless blues player. But I've seen very few guitarists that sound as sweet and melodious as Tommy. You can check out Rachel's lullaby, and it's never too late. Other I live would be Angelina, Madonna, classical gas, and Lewis and Clark. I could just talk about Tommy emmanuel all day long. He's witty, funny, makes lots of jokes on and off stage, principled and gets the job done one way or the other. He also does percussive works with the guitar, and he's just a hot to watch. He hits his head in the microphone too produce the sound of the kick of the drums. Like I said, he does anything to entertain. I need to mention that after he heard Chet, he practiced for 13 or 14 years and when he 20 he went meet Chet and he was one of the few guitarists that Chet ever certified. Tomorrow, maybe I'll discuss George Benson who has a little bit of a similar story in that he also started early. I'm sorry about the title if you were expecting vocalists or something, but I am not into vocalists at all, so I believe the greatest musicians are guitarists. Not necessarily true, but just my opinion. Thanks for reading guys. I don't like writing overly lengthy write ups, so maybe I'll continue tomorrow. Much love... You're awesome guys.

Special thanks to @jehosaphat for the sponsorship today... Sorry it's coming late. I'm down with malaria at the moment... Much love...

My Favorite Stories About Myself Hello guys good morning. It's a great day, go out and show the world how awesome you are...!!! I hope you know that in proud of you, and expect great things from you? Well, now you do, so go out, take the fight to life, and unleash the warrior within!!! Today, I bring you stories about none other than yours truly. Growing up for me wasn't fun by any stretch of the imagination. I describe my growing up as a delicate balance between happiness and sadness. I had harsh realities I had to deal with, but there were some rewarding things about my family too. No matter the training and where I grew up, I always had my eccentricities, and I don't believe it's such a bad thing as everyone is entitled so a few I believe. Today, I'm sharing some of my idiosyncrasies and how they are hilarious in hindsight. Enjoy guys. 1) **My Unique Brand of Laziness** If you've ever met anyone who hates work, then you can trace his origin back to me for I, truly am the father, god and master of all laziness!!! I'm so lazy, sometimes it's just hilarious. When we were young and our pumping machine spoilt, we had to fetch water in buckets to places in the house. Normal lazy people would try to shy away from the work, but I thought that was illogical as you can't really run away from such things forever and even doing it sluggishly would only mean elongating the process, so, I, in my infinite laziness would decide the best thing to do is fill the bucket to the brim. Now, this was just hilarious because I would end up spilling water all over the floor, thing the same number of trips as I would had I not filled it so, and also have to mop the floor which was more work!!! I eventually would come to terms with the fact that I was probably going to work now from filling the bucket to the brim, bit I still did it on the off chance that I could lessen the work even a little. Yeah, I hate work so much that I'll do the stupidest things just on the off chance I can avoid a little more work. Still on the topic of my laziness. I wash clothes everyday. This is still following the same pattern of thinking. I don't like waiting till Saturday when I'm have piled up clothes for the week. Every clothe I add to the pile of dirty clothes then used to give me headaches because I was pushing lots of work till later. So I decided to start washing everyday. So every morning, before I bathe, I would wash the clothes I wore the previous day. This is hilarious considering the fact that even when I was washing lots of clothes, it never took me ten minutes to wash a huge pile because basically, me washing was putting all the clothes in water and detergent, rolling it, and squeezing, then rinsing it in the same fashion! The thing is if anybody should be bothered about piling up clothes it should never be me because I wash about 15 clothes in the same time some people take to wash one or two!!! **2 My Early Cooking Skills** I was so poor at cooking you could see cockroaches puking when they tasted my food!!!! I remember when I first got to the University. I asked my friend how long it took to boil eggs. He told me to boil until the water was almost dry. So I filled to pot and put eggs inside. It took me about 40 minutes and when I was complaining that the eggs were still not boiled, my friend started making fun of me. Then, there's the fact that I'm always trying to do things the easy way... Looking for a hack of sorts... This is kind of related to my Laziness. Why bother trying to look for and remember a nice order of you can find an ingredient that works for every food. So, I, trying to be smart decided to add the sweetest known substance to man to every food I cooked... Well, as you would expect, or didn't turn out well with every food. I hate t rice till this day!!! But I can't cook sugar without beans (no it's not beans without sugar if the amount of sugar exceeds the amount of beans!!!). They go so well together. Other that work well would be yam and sugar, and plantain chips and sugar. After this, I hope you guys don't find me too weird. Thanks for reading. I may tell more of these stories tomorrow. Let me know if you found any hilarious... Love you guys...