Weirdest night ever; I hate vigils

Last night was one of the nights where I felt like running away; running away forever because of one thing; a vigil in my uncle's church. They mentioned yesterday morning that they'd be going for a vigil last night and from that moment I knew I wanted to run away because I hate being awake late night while stressing myself with the stand up and sit down process called praise and worship, prayer session. The stress is not the problem but my health does not allow me to stress myself especially at midnight when my heart is meant to be resting.

Stating to my uncle that I'd stay home alone would simply prove how much of a prodigal son I am. I know I'm a prodigal son but I'd rather not show it as I intend to be seen with the highest prospects possible; a self confident, and independent young man capable of self responsibility and yada yada... I have no idea of this makes any sense but I like to refer myself as such.

I had to cooperate with everyone and played along with the vigil thing without complaining, deep down I wanted to run away and perhaps come back on Saturday but ideas weren't popping into my head; I tried to figure out a place to go such that I'd come back late night and stay home alone but ideas were so far from me that I had no choice but to comply.

The vigil began much earlier than expected, we left home few minutes past 10 pm, got to the church 10. 30 pm or so and surprisingly the vigil had already begun... I at this moment knew it was going to be the longest vigil of my life. The usual time for vigil was usually 11 pm to 2 am but this vigil lasted much longer. Twas a 10 to 3 vigil, in fact 3.30 am consodering that had to do some form of anointing service after the while thing which took even extra time.

I've always been conscious of my health since a very long time ago henxe irrespective of the fact that there were a lot of people there l, I sat down most of the time. I didnt care if eyes are gonna be on me or not after all it wasny health and not theirs. And nobody had a strand of right to even ask me to stand up or he or she was gonna receive the middle finger. Yeah, I can be that nice- the middle finger will suffice if you know what I mean.

I joined the program while sitting through most of it and occasionally stood up where necessary while making sure I didn't over do it. At some point we were all asked to come to the podium for special prayers, at this point I knew I couldn't escape but did as everyone did.

It was going well until suddenly I couldn't breathe properly anymore, I tried to shake it off but it kept coming back and my while body was feeling weird, my hands were shaking and I had to run out of the church so I could get some fresh air which made me feel better. It turned out that the fact that people were gathered at a spot was totally against what my body could take, I was trying to avoid being touched and st the same time it was getting stuffy hence my body had to react by causing an inconvenience in my breathing as a self defence mechanism.

I had to run out of the church at the moment where it felt like I was about to pass out; I told myself I won't die tonight and really truly I didn't all thanks to my instinct and my self consciousness about not dying.

I felt better afterwards and didn't enter the church until we were told to go back to our seats after which I didn't join the program anymore but simply sat still till the end as I was having a striking headache caused by my inability to breathe few minutes earlier.

Vigil ended about 3.30 am and kaboom; that was it. We left for home and by few minutes to 4 am we were already home. I slept in the car about 5 times before we finally got home after which I landed on my bed and didn't wake up until fee minutes past 9 am.

Alas...I survived; no more vigil till the year runs out, in the case if any, I'd definitely not be attending as I intend to not die from lack of sleep hash-tag hypertension.

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Toddles!