@DM 18 December 2020

Dear Daadi(Grandmother)

Namaste from India. I love observing and writing about various beautiful relationships and roles we play during whole span of our human lives. I am always attracted to the purity of thoughts people participating in these relations hold for each other. Today I wanna write about grandparents. Since my grandfather passed away when I wasn't even on this earth, therefore, I am gonna share with you guys a very special bond I shared with my grandmother, stages of this pious connection which most of us have with ourr grandparents and also, my perspective towards how you should thank them for their unconditional love for you. I remember my childhood, my mother running after me, scolding me and of course, she is gonna hit me if I am caught as I committed some mischief and I would take cover behind my ***Daadi(granny)*** and then, in her elderly and world's sweetest voice she would say please stop, don't hit him and mom would stop after some failed desperate tries. At this time I was really young, a kid and I would use her for this purpose every now and then. I would never sleep with my parents and she also would never sleep without me by her side. I remember, when I was some 10 or 12 years of age, her eye sight started getting weaker and I would always pour eyedrops. We always used to go for long walks to the village market for buying goods of daily need and she would treat me always. Due to advancing age, she felt tired midway always and then we used to stop mostly under a tree as it was our daily rest spot. I often curiously looked around for things, used to throw stones in nearby brook and she would watch out for threats around and warned me if I try doing something harmful for me. She would sing something to me while we sit watching beautiful village sunset, amidst birds chirping and soothing breeze healing mother earth scorched with afternoon sun's heat and preparing her for a beautiful moonlit night. I would always dance around and soon we used to return home. Bedtime was the best time always. I had a fear of dark. She always used to tell me bed time stories, those she remembered from her amazing years of youth and adulthood. Also, sometimes ,she would make stories of her own. Mostly, she would fell asleep and then I used to say ***Daadi***(***granny***) please ***sunao na(tell me)*** and then she used to resume again in sleepy voice. This happened always till I either gave up getting her up or I myself sleep. Evening was the time for god always. She would chant prayers and do her beads and I always accompanied her. We had three places in our village house where we prayed everyday. After prayers, it was snack time and ***Daadi*** would spoon feed me always. It was affection at its peak, beyond every happiness I could ever receive and I always enjoyed it every bit. Soon we all moved to some other city as my father was transferred from his workplace. At this time, I grew up and my age was 18. Now, she was getting weaker everyday and I always ensured giving my best in her care. Medicines on time, I used to show her pictures on google, those of various things which grew out of her imagination and then she would laugh wonderfully being amazed as she knew nothing about modern technology. It was something as advanced for her as time machine is for us. I always knew, this is the time when she needs me the most and I never disappointed her. How she used to cover me with blankets when I was a kid and I was doing the very same thing everyday now. Massaging her feet sometime would make her the happiest person on the planet and I really loved it. Of course I miss her and that's what fueled me to write this post today. She was diagnosed with Parkinson disease(https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/parkinsons-disease/symptoms-causes/syc-20376055) when I was some 13 or 14 years of age and since then, to the date when she passed away on 13 of july 2020, I always gave her medicines three times a day except for 3 years when I went for college to some other city. I am not sharing this information for sympathy but it was a beautiful process and therefore, I decided to share it with you guys. Parkinson had phases of its own, her hands started shivering a lot and then her feet too and some 4 or 5 years later, she started forgetting things but she never forgot taking medicines from me. Due to hallucinations , she imagined things and then often would say that I won't take medicine from mother but never opposed me or my brother when we offered. Sometimes when she won't eat, I fed her with my hands and I really loved doing so. As the celebrated genius, **William Shakespeare** tells us in his work, **The Seven Ages of Man** about the last stage of a person, very old, just like a child again, I always confirmed it when I fed her. She often would push away the spoon and make faces but after saying just one more or giving her some water, she finally did finish it. After food, I would ask her for whatever she needs and then would let her sleep covering her with blankets. I always enjoyed the process and it was just a little gesture from my side for all the dearest memories we shared. She was and will always be the dearest to me. *****As per me, what should you guys never miss with these lovely godly people :***** As the age advances, person starts feeling ignored if you don't respond to what they say and thus they get frustrated and they really can't do anything about it but feel abandoned. Never let it happen. Give them all the time you can and as much as you can. Share your experiences with them, things which you come across in your daily lives. They really love it. Massage their muscles(feet and arms) while making a conversation with them. My ***Daadi*** always blessed me like a million times when I did this. Support her while they walk and try to take them on short walks with you. I always slept by her side till I could and her hand on my face was the best blessing ever. You too can, maybe on some nights when they really need you. Celebrate their moments which they used to when they were young and active. Ask them for advices. Their hair are grey not with advancing age only but a hell lot of experience and they may guide you for the best possible. Most of grandparents know nothing of or are not advanced enough to use advanced tech devices these days. You can be their favorite, helping them with it. Tell them how to operate or do it for them. Love them like anything, make as much memories as you can as no one knows what will happen tomorrow. Take them to the places they want, take care of their diet and be a devotee. They are the best. I can bet that the warmth, positivity, selflessness, unconditional love and care their soul offers is next to god's and they are like the angels which may bid farewell anytime. In their weaker days, be their support like they used to carry you when you couldn't walk. Don't let the generation gap spoil what you had. As we advance in age, our development takes places according to the stimulus from surrounding and often we loose what we had with our grandparents but don't let that happen. Promise them, with all your soul, the love and care you can. They are like the skies of families, the abode of the sun which always brings warmth in our lives. Give your best try at being their guardians<3<3<3<3<3.