@Clintbling 3 September 2020 more from that month

Those Who Are Heartless Once Cared Too Much

I’ve lost a lot of friends over the years and I don’t know if it’s just from growing apart, or we’ve just changed, or I’m doing something wrong. And it’s always felt like I’ve done something wrong on my part. I know I’m not perfect, but I know I’m a good person. I know I’m loyal and compassionate to my friends. Yet it feels like I’m doing something wrong. And I’m trying really, really hard to be... I don’t know, something better? I feel like I need to be something better than myself right now so that maybe I can make some friends, but I feel like my best hasn’t been good enough. I don’t know what to do. All I feel is just... tired. Like I don’t want to try anymore. I don’t know why it’s so hard for me to find a good friend. I’m so scared of making new ones right now because it feels like I’m going to screw it all up again.