You don't dare display the bravery at your parents
Before the Advent of the internet that was quickly accompanied by the general breakdown of morals among young people, discipline was the major focal point of childhood. In my parts of the word, kids were also taught bravery by the parents.
We were expected by our parents to always stand up against bullies instead of running back home crying to mummy. Well, many African mom's insisted that they never gave birth to a "weakling". So, if you are a weakling, it's better to lick your wounds in peace else the harsh criticism you would get from an African mom could be more upsetting than whatever harassment you got from a child of same age as you.
**Image source** https://www.dreamstime.com/photos-images/african-parent-scolding-child.html
But you are free to tell Mom about it if you had been outnumbered or attacked by a gang of little brats. In such a case, mom would personally take up the matter with the school authorities or confront the parents of the kids.
Generally speaking, parents had groomed their kids to be confident and outspoken even in front of the authorities and adults who might want to cheat them because they are little.
But ofcourse, you dare not display such bravery at your parents. In simpler terms, you dare not talk back at your African parents! Because even if a dog is mad, it should be able to recognize its owner.
Even when you think your parents perceptions or opinions about you are wrong, it's better to keep your mouth shut and swallow as much anger you could swallow than to talk back at your parents else you risk a good slap landing on the side of your face. This kind of parental slap could cause one of your ears to go deaf momentarily as you struggle to regain your senses while muttering inaudible words of apology. We call this kind of slap a "brain resetting slap" .
Infact, you should consider yourself lucky if it only ends at a slap. If the parent is heavy-handed, a slipper, stick, hanger, broom or even bucket could land on your body multiple times.
**Image source** https://www.hurriyetdailynews.com/amp/mother-faces-five-years-in-prison-for-throwing-slipper-at-son-105814
Throughout your period of torture, it is normal for you to scream as much as you like so that the neighbors would hear and come to your rescue . But you dare not raise a finger in defense else the whole community will rush to your house and assist your mother in casting the spirit of stubbornness and disrespect out of your life forever.
Personally, my dad have never struck me and I have never disrespected or disappointed him ever since I was a kid. We have also seen children whose parents had beat them like drum at any small offense, and they later turned worse in the future. So, how true is the saying " spare the rod and spoil the child?" . On the flip side, we have seen people who have their parents to thank for never sparing the rod each time they erred grievously during childhood, else they would have gone astray.
Although, many adults might never know that they had been physically abused when they were kids all in the name of discipline
Times have changed, and just like everything else, modern parenting has also evolved psychological, behavioural, analytical and even spiritual methods of helping a child realise the consequences of his actions.
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The case of getting married before an elder sibling.
Around 2013 when I was still in high school, we had this neighbor who had three daughters and a boy. They were all passed the age of 21.
That year, it happened that the youngest daughter found a man who took her very seriously and wanted her to marry him. Well, the news of the youngest sister's marriage really shook the family's peace as the eldest daughter was not comfortable that her second junior would be getting married before she does. She tried to persuade her parents to tell her sister's fiancee to postpone the marriage by atleast a year as none of the men she was dating had proposed to her yet. But her father insisted that so long as the young man was capable and ready to get married to her younger sister, then that's not a valid reason for stopping him.
Exactly a year after the marriage, the eldest daughter got married and the second sister got engaged thesame year. They literally forced the men they were dating to do what has to be done.
The truth was that the the first two sisters had been jumping from one car to another for a long time. It was only when their younger sister had brought a husband home that they had a rethink and started taking thier life seriously.
The scenario above applies majorly to the fair gender maybe because women are more emotional, especially when the age gap between the two girls is quite large. Even if the age difference is just one or two years, the older one might not be too comfortable especially when the two sisters don't share a mutual love or respect as blood sisters. In in this case, the rivalry would still continue even after the both of them have gotten married.
But a man wouldn't care-less if his younger brother gets married start having kids, getting older and even die before him,Lol.
It also depends on the type of society. In the African culture, it is customary for the elder sister's marriage to be celebrated before the rest. That's the sequence through which our mothers and grandmothers got married .
Infact, some parents aren't always comfortable giving a younger daughter hands in marriage while the older one is still at home.
In most cases, I have seen older sisters who had shared in their younger siblings joy and even played active roles and you would agree with me that this is the right thing to do. Infact, it's possible that a sister might find her own man in her younger sister's wedding. I have heard about this countless times.
By and large, I believe God's plan for everyone is unique irrespective of age. Different persons have special destinies which must be fulfilled through different path at different periods of life.
Lastly, you would all agree with me times have really changed alot of things even in the most conservative societies. Marriage generally has got nothing to do with mundane issues like age or the age of a sibling.
**Lead image is from unsplash.com**
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Understanding facial expressions
Oftentimes, people tend to judge a book by it's cover. Alot of people you meet in life at first impression might assess you by the way you talk, stand, walk or even with a mere handshake. So it's very important for one to always exude confidence in their carriage and mien.
In most cases, facial expressions goes a long way in the interpretation of one's truely perception about others or events. Most emotions gain true manifestation through the look on the face be it joy, despair, frustration, fear, desire or anger. For instance, if someone would say that they are well, the expression on their face might tell a different tale
**Image source** https://unsplash.com/@elyaspasban
Infact, it has been established that a person's intelligence could be assessed through the body languages and facial expressions they carry around. You could easily guess if a person is brave or timid just by maintaining an eye contact.
**Image source** https://unsplash.com/@benjaminwedemeyer
People who smile alot are believed to be more emotionally intelligent than folks who are always wearing a forlorn or unhappy expression.
Regular blinking of the eye is normal but when a person starts blinking incessantly during a convo, it shows that they are disturbed by something. On the other hand, maintaining a steady gaze or infrequently blinking suggests that a person is trying to concentrate or he/she is in deep thought. No wonder, we'd wave a hand with a "hello" in the face of a person who appears not to pay attention anymore to what we have been saying.
Raising the eyebrows could indicate a pleasant surprise or suspicion, depending on the situation.
Also, various movement of the mouth could convey different messages. Biting the edge of the lower lip could show sudden regret or worry. Folding both lips onward would indicate sudden wave of concentration or thoughts . Putting the hands over the mouth could be in an effort to stiffen a cought or laughter, especially when in formal gathering. .
Further more, smiles are about the most commonest facial expressions and they could mean a lot of things either genuine, sarcastic, regret .....
**Lead images and all images are from unsplash.com**
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Malaria __fever. 🥵🥵🤒😭😭
Starting a business for your wife could be a life-saver
Frank was a businessman who imports cars into the country through the borders. He also have a car-lot where he helps other other men to buy and sell cars . Indeed this was a very lucrative business and Frank and his family lived comfortably. He was even able to send a decent monthly allowance to his two sisters and mother-in-law.
After three years in car dealership, the government of the country decided to shutdown it's borders based on a number of reasons. Many businessmen whose source of livelihood came through the borders became stranded.
Frank's main source of income crumbled and his finances began to go from bad to worse as it became clear that the government were not going to open the borders anytime soon.
Over a year ago, when their life were still blooming, she had repeatedly pestered her husband to set up a business for her but Frank never paid her much attention. Frank's wife tope, cried bitterly when they were unable to feed themselves adequately. Their finances became so bad that tope had to take her children to her mother's house who was a petty trader so that they could get something to eat.
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Chidi and some of his colleagues been laid off after working for a reputable bank for five years. This was part of the bank's decision to trim down the size of it's employees before merging with a bigger bank. Before his sack, chidi had set up a retail business for his girlfriend from what he had managed to save during his time as a bank staff.
So, now that he was jobless, instead of going through the rigorous processes of looking for another job, he thought it better to invest his time and experience into his partner's business which was already flourishing. With chidi's intelligence and his wife's hardwork, they were able to build a big brand that provided enough funds to cater for their children's education overseas.
Setting up a business for your spouse could be a life-saver but still, some men hold to the belief that wether their wife works or not, the man would still be the one to settle the monthly bills since he earns more. So they find it more convenient for their wives to remain at home looking after the family in full submission while they go out to assume the role as "head of the family".
Having a wife who owns a business even if it's a small shop offers security to her marriage as she would definitely learn a few business strategies that would allow her to offer valuable financial advices to her husband.
By the way, the unstable economic conditions of a country doesn't encourage a wife to be jobless, unless ofcourse she have a husband who is a Nigerian politician. 😆
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A Test tube - baby
Yes, I have seen one before. She's just five years and beautiful too. She's so intelligent that one would think she's older than her age or maybe possesses some divine gifts.
**Image source** https://unsplash.com/s/photos/black-kid
when I first heard about test-tube baby, I was 1 was 14 years old. For a long time, I kept wondering wether a baby had spent nine months in a test tube rather than in his mother's womb. Lol. Well, let me make it clearer for the non scientists.
In-vitro fertilization is simply the process of conceiving a child by mixing the sex gametes of both parents externally. It's nothing short of a miracle to be able to give couples who have been long suffering from infertility a new hope by providing an excellent option to be called parents just like their peers.
Children born through assisted reproductive technique are popularly but figuratively called "test-tube babies".
Now the test-tube is a symbol of science, a very important apparatus in a science lab and scientific processes. since these babies are brought to life through scientific knowledge, hence the name.
**Image source** https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Test_tube
Assisted Reproductive Technique ( ART) at the time of it's inception, had been widely criticised by alot of religious zealots all over the world. But the scientists behind ART never thought themselves God niether do they claim to give children. ART only makes the process of conception more easier for couples who had been finding it difficult to have a child after all possible methods have failed.
**Image source** https://www.ndtv.com/mumbai-news/mumbais-first-test-tube-baby-becomes-mother-1285025/amp/1
The problem could be due to an obstruction in the fallopian tube of the woman where fertilization takes place. For the male, it could be due to the inability to produce adequate male gametes or production of low quality gametes.
The key process involves the injection of the sperms over the eggs contained in a petri-dish ( test-tubes are not even basically involved). The mixture is then returned into the female's body and everything else occur occur naturally till nine months time. The medical scientists never had a hand in the moulding of the face, heart, limbs and other internal organs.
The beauty about ART is that it often times leads to multiple births, 70 percent of the time. This is because doctors are likely to return two to five developing humans ( embryos) into the woman's body just so that the probability of delivery is improved. So before the completion of nine months, a couple are expected to be making preparations for twins, triplets or even quadruplets 😁
**Image source** https://sehajmal.com/en/test-tube-baby-method/
The first test-tube baby was born successfully in 1978 and currently there are about 6 millions individuals that have been brought to the world through Assisted Reproductive Technique, even though it could be a quite expensive.
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Honey or Sugar; A popular misconception
Some few weeks ago, a lactating mother I met at a wedding party was telling her friend that she would start adding honey to her six months old son's pap because of "it's nutritional value". Well at this point, even if I wasn't invited into the conversation, I had to scream at her not to try it, unless ofcourse she wants to infect her baby with botulism.
Alright, we all know that honey is gotten from bees. It is also a known fact that honey has a reputation of being more healthy than refine sugar even if both of them are sweeteners.
Quite recently,alot of people have been dumping refined sugar and now embracing honey for use in tea, beverages and cereals because they believe honey is more beneficial than white sugar which is true
We also know that honey is medicinal as it contains anti-inflammatory substances which speeds up the healing of wounds and third degree burns.
Alot of people also know that honey contains alot of minerals and vitamins that are not present in sugars and this is one of the reasons why it is considered as a better substitute to sugar.
**Image source** https://food.ndtv.com/health/11-amazing-honey-benefits-boosts-immunity-treats-cough-and-more-1397491/amp/1
**Now, let's look at the other side of honey that most people don't know about**
Honey is majorly composed of fructose and glucose . But this components are also found in sugar and they act thesame way in the body wether through honey or sugar. Glucose and fructose are primary energy sources and that's why children who are found of consuming sugary foods like candies, chocolates, sodas, ice cream are fond of jumping and running all over the place.
**Image source** https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/nutritionsource/carbohydrates/added-sugar-in-the-diet/
Now, an adult who had formed an habit of regularly consuming honey risk a spike in his blood sugar level. This risk could be more dangerous if the person is diabetic or predisposed to diabetes. This is because over 70 percent of the components found in refined sugar are also present in honey.
Well, if you are wondering about about all those vitamins and minerals that were mentioned in honey, just know that you have to consume like a litre of honey each day for you to be able to have enough of them. And trust me, before those nutrients would even begin to work for you, you would already be down with a serious sugar problem. But nonetheless, these vitamins and minerals could be easily gotten from vegetables and fruits at even cheaper prices.
During childhood, before going to school, our mother would add three teaspoonful to her children's tea instead of sugar. No doubt this practice was good for our health especially our mental health. But later in the day, my silly younger brother would sneak into mom's room when she goes to the market and take three to five gulps from the bottle of honey. And since he was still a kid who could not possibly get diabetes or a kidney problem, he suffered from tooth decay instead .
**Image source** https://kakardentalgroup.com/blog/tips-to-prevent-tooth-decay-in-kids/
Due to it's various nutrients and medicinal benefits, honey is more expensive than refined sugar and people with money would want to stick to it and even abuse it. They are ignorant of the fact that it also contains a higher level of calories than sugar. And ofcourse, higher calories means more weight gain and this also have an health implication.
By the way, even if honey is natural, there are more than 200 varieties of honey out there and a good number of them have been refined especially in non African countries. Infact some could be adulterated and wouldn't contain as much benefits as the natural honey . Even the ones that still have bees inside could still be impure.
**Conclusion**
Health wise, Moderation is key. Excessive consumption of a particular food or substance could put the body at a disadvantage both in the short or long term. There's nothing wrong about using white sugar or honey regularly so long as their usage is controlled.
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The power of self awareness
Self awareness is simply the ability of an individual to control himself and also maintain a positive and optimistic mindset in all times especially in seemingly negative circumstances.
Without self awareness, you wouldn't know who you are or what you want in life or what you wouldn't want. Without self awareness, you would only be existing for the most part without living, since you are still unaware of what you are capable of.
Ther are three thought processes associated with an individual.
I) what people know about you.
II) what you know about yourself
III) what you and others didn't know about you.
Of these, the third is the most critical as theis is where your potentials, ability and power to change the world lies and they are still waiting to be unlocked.
Hence, self awareness is a lifelong process . Also, a deep sense if awareness helps one to navigate through the various myriads of limitations created by one's own mind which includes; anger, depression, sadness and low self-esteem.
Without a deep sense of awareness,one could be easily manipulated even by one's own family talkmore of the treacherous world. Knowing that all your unpleasant feelings are actually caused by your own reactions to people and situation is a very important step in living a well poised and balanced life. Because the truth is ; no one can ever hurt you without your permission. As they say; " you can't change what people think about you but you can always choose how you react'.
In essence, when you have developed self awareness, you would know how you'd control your emotions : when to get angry ( if necessary), when to laugh, when to be sober or even smirk. A self conscious person would definitely have an improved ability on thyself and thy actions.
Some few benefits of self awareness;
I) It gives one the control over one's internal energy which in most cases influence the outcome of the physical world
A good example of the result of being self aware;
John had graduated for three years now and still unemployed. Every now and then, he come across one opportunity or the other, but he's too discouraged to take a step based on the number of individuals jostling for that one opportunity. So due to low self-esteem,he always assume a defeatist mentality and allowed numerous opportunities to pass him by. But recently , a friend recommended a book on self help to John titled "the power of now" authored by echart Tolle and this book had totally revamped John's mindset and confidence
Immediately, he started believing in his power for good and he got to learn and master a few skills which gave him good leverage in the midst of competition.
Soon, John realised that he had been the problem all along and not the government or his environment nor his family.
2) With self awareness, one is able analyze things from different perspective s therefore seeing things that others fail to see, thereby making wise judgement.
3) A self conscious individual is totally free from prejudice, baseless assumptions and sentiments. Things that sway majority of the population.
Always idealise the perfect frame of your life and keep this in mind every other day and at thesame time, think about your goals, abilities, confidence and hopes. Because the more you draw courage from your strengths, the more accurately you will be guided towards the right direction by sheer intuition and will. And every success you achieve no matter how little would make you more resolute and determined to reach your peak no matter what distraction might come your way later .
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A common superstition about an hiccup that turns out to be true
Hiccups could happen to us inadvertently and they aren't life-threatening . Infact some of us might enjoy having them . Everyone, both dead or alive had experienced an hiccup at one time or the other.
Even when we were kids, if a child gets a sudden hiccup after a heavy laughter, other children would e try to induce theirs so that we could all "hiccup" in rhythm. Lol.
Scientifically, an hiccup is caused when the diaphragm: a broad muscle which seperates the chest from the abdomen momentarily seals off the air supply before it gets to the vocal cavity. Although the cause of an hiccup remains unknown, but it's thought to be largely due to irritation in the diaphragm .
**Image source** https://myhealth.alberta.ca/Health/Pages/conditions.aspx?hwid=zm2667
Abnormal hiccups could be caused by excessive consumption of alcohol or indigestion . In any case, when an hiccup last for hours, then there could be a psychological, respiratory abnormalities which in this case, could be lethal.
**Superstitious beliefs about Hiccups**
It is believed in most cultures around the world that when one is experiencing an hiccup, them someone somewhere is probably thinking or talking about them. And until they could be able to guess the name of the person correctly, the hiccup wouldn't go away.
Well we all know this is wrong belief. If it were so, then half of the inhabitants of world would be suffering from fits of hiccup for hours a day because the other half are talking about them.
Although there's is no remedy to hiccups, but it's generally believed that drinking water could clear one's throat.
In our culture, it is recommended that when one who starts experiencing an hiccup, they should take seven( 7) sips from a cup of water. You are expected to complete the seven gulps even though you begin to feel alright after the first two drinks.
**Image source** https://www.healthline.com/health/food-nutrition/why-is-water-important
I just remembered a scenario that happened when I was much younger, I was in alone in the room with my baby brother who was just a few months old when he started experiencing a bout of hiccup. So, based on what I have been told of the water cure, I quickly fetched a jar of water and tried to get the baby to take seven slops. We were about going for the fourth round when my mum suddenly barged in and screamed in awe at my action.
Before I could explain the situation, she snatched the jar from me and splashed the water all over my head and face.
"But he was having an hiccup", I said innocently.
"You don't force an infant to drink water during an hiccup", mom said angrily.
Instead, she got a length of thread from her drawer and placed it on the baby's soft and oily hair. Also immediately , the hiccup ceased.
**Image source** https://www.babycenter.com/baby/newborn-baby
This surely looked like magic to me!
She told me that's how to take care of a newborn who was experiencing hiccup as told my her mother ( my grandma). Some days later, I adopted this method when the hicupps started again and it worked!
Indeed, this method wasn't just peculiar to mom, I also got to know that alot of women in my country would also place a strand of thread on their baby's hair and it never fails. Any Nigerian on this platform would recognize this to be true 😁
I'm still searching for the scientific explanation surrounding the use of a thread to cure a baby's hiccup but I guess there wouldn't be any. Somethings are just inexplicably.
A superstitious belief that always comes true!
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You might be hurting your liver
One thing about internal organs is that we never know when they are about to breakdown since we can't see them the way we could mirror our face.
Isn't it quite ironic that almost everyone spend alot of money and time to look good on the outside without realizing that they might be dying inside?
Well, I don't think that the person/people one is trying to impress with one's physical appearance would be interested anymore if they get to see that one has a got a bad organ.
A doctor once said: "If people could have the opportunity to see their kidneys and liver just once and get to know the extent of abuse that they have been subjected to over the years due to an unhealthy lifestyle and negligence, then the they wouldn't care so much about how their faces and hair look anymore. Instead all energy and effort would be channelled towards salvaging what's left of the internal organs.
What is more mind-blowing is that some of the things we do just to gain the admiration of others could compromise our health.
It was only recently that I got to know that one could harm their liver by having a tattoo or piercings !
The chances of one getting hepatitis C rises through the use of unsterilized equipments because the virus maybe transmitted from an infected blood to another. The consequence is a lifelong liver disease which ofcourse could be life-threatening.
I wouldn't even begin to talk about the baked and packaged foods ( junks) that we all consume which contains a high amount of man-made fat. If you are observant enough, you would see where it is clearly written on the pack "partially hydrogenated vegetable oil". A food that is high in artificial fat not only increases the risk of obesity which results to a swollen and less active liver. It also leads to the replacement of the liver cells by useless fibrous tissues, a condition popularly known a liver cirrhosis.
Apart from the damages that excessive consumption of alcohol could do to the liver , soft drinks could also cause liver inflammation irrespective of wether they contain sugar or not. It doesn't matter if it's an energy or calorie free drink , because such might contain one or more ingredients besides sugar that could irritate the liver when consumed over a long period of time.
Also, just because it is natural doesn't mean it is hundred percent safe. Alot of folks especially from the rural areas have come to embrace traditional roots and herbs as a effective substitute for the pharmacy. The truth is that even if these herbal remedies could successfully cure an ailment, they didn't undergo the vigorous processes involved in purification and prescription unlike the drugs from pharmaceutical companies.
Hence, they could still contain alot of unfiltered active substances that could remain in the body system long after the ailment have been cured. And since detoxification is among the various functions of the liver, the liver continually works towards neutralising these chemicals from the body. Thus, the liver could be overwhelmed when there's a continual intake of such herbal solutions in large quantities. The resulting effect could lead to the untimely breakdown of the liver since it is always under stress.
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***"We should always take care of our body cause it is the only place we have to live in".***
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How difficult is it to be rich and yet live a private life?
Well, you wouldn't blame some wealthy folks who can't stop flaunting their wealth at others especially in the media. Some of them have really worked hard before they got to where they are today and using every opportunity to put up a show to the rest of the world could always give them a feeling of pride as they'd feel they have paid their dues.
Although, there are also a good percentage of exhibitionists who had acquired wealth through inheritance,dishonest methods or just by sheer luck.
No need to mention that such brazen display of wealth would definitely make a less privileged person feel more miserable and inadequate.
Well again, you wouldn't blame them because sometimes it depends on the industry that one belongs. Folks who belong to the entertainment industry are most likely to lead a flashy lifestyle than any other group of people as such display would attract more attention, fans,sponsorship and contracts which would ofcourse translate to more money for them . Hence they can't help it.
However, we have seen a few famous celebrities who would rather live a fairly private life away from the public when compared to their conterparts in thesame industry.
This ofcourse is largely determined by the psychological disposition and personalities and vices that vary among humans just like the meaning of life differ from one man to the other.
This is similar to the reason why far more wealthier business men and captains of industry would prefer to lead a simple lifestyle and would even donate huge Sums albeit anonymously to various humanitarian causes. And there would always be another group of wealthy folks who would always crave all things that money could buy.
While being rich and popular have its own perks, the downsides are not too far fetched because people who are fond of flaunting their achievement are often targeted. A person who is fond of telling the world about his good fortune would very soon have to start dealing with the incessant demands of distant family members who hitherto never remembered him when he was still living in the trenches. This unending pestering by family and friends is enough to drive anyone nuts.
Apart from that, a flashy lifestyle could encourage punks into kidnapping a loved one for payment and one's life could also be at risk in the case of robbery. And since fame is something that feeds the human ego, many rich individuals would risk ignoring the negative feelings that their vanity had attracted .
On the other hand, being rich and fairly unknown always gives one a sense of inner peace and satisfaction . You wouldn't have to always put up with people's opinions and analysis about your life. Personally, I don't think I would be able to live happily in wealth when I see others around me striving to feed for a day.
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I seriously lack words to express my appreciation to madam @gertu13 for the renewal. Despite my inconsistencies, you still support me with an unwavering support . Oh thank you mummy 🥰💝
A spiritual process III
**A spiritual process I** https://read.cash/@Bilqees/a-spiritual-process-29840ce2
**A spiritual process II**
Choima continued to plead with her father profusely. She even threatened that she was going to hurt herself if anything happens to her soon-to-be husband. At last her father agreed to call her uncle so that they would proceed with the ritual rites. Chioma's uncle then instructed both of them to to come meet him in the village the following morning.
When they finally got to the village , chioma met her uncle in a deep discussion with some group of elders and It was obvious that they were discussing her problem. As soon as the elders saw her, they all stood up to greet her which made her quite confused. Her uncle explained to her that it is part of tradition that they accord the bride of the gods with as much as respect. Chioma was perplexed to say the least.
After the warm welcome, the elders berated her father for allowing the problem to linger this long before bringing her to the village for the necessary rituals. The villagers were already getting worried about who the gods have chosen as the bride this time around . This phenomenon wasn't so strange afterall. The gods chooses a bride every five or seven years amongst the female children born into a particular family.
Most parentse usually bring their daughters for cleansing as soon as they start noticing a sign at an early age that she's the chosen one. Ofcourse the elders respected chioma's parents new religious path but religion is one thing and customs is another thing. The both have to be respected. Chioma's father admitted his mistake and apologised for his ignorance.
Chioma was handed over to three older women who would preside over the rituals and they set off to work immediately without saying a word to her.
After stripping off her clothes, she was asked to kneel down in a circle drawn with a white chalk and the women began to chant over her head with their eyes above her head. Chioma felt really awkward and she tried to cover some sensitive part of her body with her hands but the three women weren't bothered. Their chants were getting louder and louder till one of them slipped into a trance and started speaking in another language that chioma couldn't understand. The woman's eyes had gone completely red and the terrible sight of her sent cold fears through chioma's naked body.
After the incantations was over. The three ladies dragged chioma to the back of the house and began to bath her with some black soap and native sponge under the bright sunlight. Fortunately, no one was around the area . The three women didn't take it easy with her as they scrubbed her skin so hard that she began to cry.
When they were done bathing her, she was given a very white but long wrapper to tied aroun her body. Then they proceeded in coating parts of her face, chest, hands and legs with a white chalk.
**Image source** https://www.plat4om.com/amazing-african-traditions-you-didnt-know-about/
She was then to the shrine for the second phase of the ritual. There she found a little boy holding a fruit basket while sitting a small stool.
The three ladies told her that she would remain in the shrine for three days. Chioma thought this was ridiculous and she immediately demanded why she should stay alone in this dark hut for three days.
" This is the most important phase of the ritual and it would also mark the end of the spiritual process. You wouldn't eat anything as you would not feel hungry in these three days neither would you feel the urge to ease yourself. I must also warn you, no matter what happens here, you should never cry. The bride of the gods is not supposed to cry in the presence of the gods. And by the way, you wouldn't be alone, that little child seated over there would keep you company till the three days are over".
The older of the three ladies said to chioma before they left.
That night, chioma kept hearing strange and fearful sound within the shrine and when ever she tried to sleep, she would have nightmares of masquerades chasing her. The little boy kept looking at her through out the night with an indifferent expression in his eyes. Chioma was almost losing her mind and she felt like crying, but the gods had forbade her not to cry. ......
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A spiritual process II
Incase you missed the first part of the story, you could check it out here.
**A spiritual process**
As soon as she walked into the restaurant, her uncle stood up and began to hail her with some nice tribal names. Chioma smiled at him as her head began to swell like local garri. Chioma was no doubt her uncle's favorite niece as they share alot in common in terms of bravery and intelligence. Infact, they belonged to thesame profession.
When they were both seated, chioma demanded the cause of the misunderstanding between him and her father. She had met both men in a heated argument some three days ago when she returned home from work. What made her very worried was that her name was mentioned in the verbal exchange and that means the issue had something to do with her.
Chioma's uncle looked at her for a very long while and decided that there was no better time to tell her the whole truth than now. He had been keeping this secret since she was born and he was quite sure that her father would never tell her. It was hightime she knows about it before marriage. Hell! She was already 30 years old !
Chioma was shocked when she saw a sudden expression of fear and danger in her uncle's eyes.
"Dear chioma, there's fire on your mountain and your dad is still playing with the fire". Her uncle began to speak after observing her for like 3 minutes.
"Our family have a long history of idol worshipping and on his deathbed, your grandfather had revealed that the gods of our village have chosen you as their bride".
He further revealed to her that she would always be wealthier than any man she had intercourse with since she had already been favored by the gods. Infact this was the main reason while she have accomplished astounding success in her career despite her young age.
Her uncle told her that the reason why he had been in a quarrel with her father the other day was because he only reminded him that she was made for the gods and that there are necessary sacrifices that had to be done before she could marry a mortal man.
Now the problem was that, chioma's uncle was a traditional worshipper while her parents were devoted christains who frowned at Oracle worshipping, so chioma's dad had refused to involve himself or members of his family in any devilish nonsense .
Chioma's uncle finally dropped the bombshell . " Any man that would marry you would be struck to death by the gods on your wedding night. The gods would never share their bride with a mere mortal. It is the wish of the gods that you remain unmarried til the rest of your days!"
**Image source** https://www.cnn.com/style/amp/joana-choumali-resilients-photography/index.html
He further explained that this was the main reason while she kept suffering from series of heartbreaks in the past. According to him, her current partner whom she would be getting married to in a month time had been blessed with a really strong spirit and that was the reason why he had stayed with her for such a long time. But Harrison's life would definitely come to an abrupt end the day he married her. No one dares the gods!
Chioma couldn't believe what she was hearing. With mouth agape, she kept looking at her uncle as if she was watching a blockbuster movie . After a long moment, she tried saying something but her throat had gone dry, tears fell from her eyes instead.
"God forbid! God forbid!! She finally screamed.
" I can never be the bride to any dirty gods". But deep down, she already knew that her uncle wouldn't joke with such a thing. Infact the conviction in his voice was unmistakable . She immediately lost energy and slumped into her seat and began to cry. She knew she was in deep trouble. Her fiancee's life was in danger!
Chioma's uncle kept explaining the seriousness of her predicament to her.
"Your father knows as much as I do but he's only feigning ignorant because of his religion. But we are talking about your life right now. If you ever want to get married successfully, there are some rituals that have to be performed in order to ward off evil. The spiritual processes is not even as complicated as it seems. If it were in the olden days, you would be required to serve in the shrine of the gods for 3 years before you can start thinking of getting married to a mortal man. But trust me, such wouldn't be your case but we still have got to act fast and your father must play a role in the ritual rites since he was the one that gave you life. As an uncle, I could only take charge of the responsibilities if your father had died".
Chioma was badly shaken and with trembling hands, she picked up her phone and called her father. " If you want the best for me, you better agree to what uncle wants you to do", she cried on the phone.
But her father still maintained that he wouldn't call her uncle neither would he take part in some devilish nonsense.
" Don't listen to the rubbish your uncle is brainwashing you with, my dear. We are now christains and old things have passed away. We would never be blackmailed into worshipping idols. You would get married to the man you love and nothing will happen to him".
Her father had started praying over the phone when chioma hung up. She thought that this was not the time of prayers but actions.
"Your father is only postponing the evil day". Her uncle said pitifully as he shook his head. Without saying anything else, chioma stormed out of the restaurant. As soon as she got to her parents house, she began to scream at her father......
To be continued....
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Thanks for reading 💝😁
A spiritual process
When chioma finally arrived at Harrison's apartment, she saw him with a middle-aged man whom Harrison introduced as his spiritual father. He had told her about this man before but this was the first time that she would be meeting him . From the uneasy look on the faces of the two men, no one needed to tell her that something was not right.
She asked her fiancee, Harrison if there was any problem. Harrison told her that there was something serious that the man of God wants her to know.
The next thing that chioma heard was the most ridiculous thing that anybody have ever told her before. The man of God candidly informed her that there was no way her and Harrison would ever get married. He explained that God has revealed to him that she had been possessed by evil forces that were working against her.
In her bewilderment, she quickly turned to Harrison and searched his eyes for an explanation and Harrison told her that he had been equally confused about the revelation and that was why he had to call her so that she could also hear from the horse's mouth. And together, they could seek for a solution.
Even if they would later get married, the pastor had instructed that a spiritual cleansing must take place first which would include fasting and praying in order to break the ill luck hovering around chioma.
The pastor was still talking when she broke down in tears and wept bitterly. Chioma had already picked a wedding date and preparations were in top gear. Now this "man of God" is telling her that she couldn't marry her man.... *Is this playing, what kind of playing is this?*
She was already in her early thirties and she had suffered alot of heartbreaks that would last her for another lifetime. She only found Harrison some 7months ago and she had thought he was Godsent. But now, her whole world seem to be crashing down once again.
Harrison on the other hand did his best to comfort her. He told her to take solace in the fact that there was still a solution to their problem as all hope were not entirely lost . If they could only complete this spiritual process, then they would definitely get married.
Chioma told the pastor that she was ready to even fast for a 100 days so long as she could get married to Harrison afterwards. The pastor looked at chioma for a long while and this made her felt as if she was in front of judge who was about to pass a final verdict. Her legs suddenly began to Shake.
"What kind of dreams have you been having lately and what are the events that keep reoccurring in your dreams"? The pastor asked.
Now, the young lady was quite taken aback by this question but she replied that she hadn't been dreaming lately. Infact she hadn't experienced any dreams for over a month now.
This reply made the pastor laughed and he said that he had never met anyone who doesn't take her spiritual life seriously like chioma. According to him, it was not proper for someone not to be experiencing dreams. It was a great sign of spiritual weakness.
Now chioma was a bit disgusted as this man was gradually prying into her private life. At 30 years old, chioma was already a very successful business woman. She was far richer than all the men she had dated in the past, including Harrison. Infact she could walk into a carlot and purchase five brand new cars at a time. Yes, she was that Rich.
Her life was going well, she hardly falls sick, she always see the results of her hardwork, she had a great career and most importantly, the money keeps flowing in.
So why should she be bothered about having dreams or not having them. It was only the person who had countless obstacles to surmount in life that would be running from one church to other seeking for solutions. She thought.
As if the pastor had been reading what was going through her mind, he began to tell her the importance of taking one's spiritual life seriously despite all the "successes" that one may think that one had achieved in life. Infact, the man of God made bold to say that if he orders Harrison to cancel the wedding plans immediately, Harrison would do it without any hesitation.
At this moment, she turned towards Harrison and the indifferent expression she saw his eyes told her more than anything that the pastor was right.
With a sinking feeling in her heart, chioma knew instinctively that she might lose Harrison again even though the wedding day was just three weeks from now . Fresh sobs rushed to her throat as she shed hot tears
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Thanks for reading 😁💝
His father died thesame day Michael Jackson died
Yesterday's morning, I was listening to a favorite radio program that is being aired from 6:30am to 9:00am. At a particular section of the program, the birthdays of popular faces would be announced .
I must confess, it's quite cool knowing that you share thesame birthday with important and great personalities around the world. As a July 19th born, It was from this radio channel that I got to know that I share same birthday with Tom Hanks, Jennifer Lopez, Chris Hemsworth, Vin Diesel, Sandra Bullock , Arnold Schwarzenegger, George Clooney and Selena Gomez. 😁
Yesterday, it was announced that the great Michael Jackson was one of the celebrants of the 29th August . At the mention of the legend, my mind quickly took me back to memory lane some 13years ago when he died.
I was in my first year in high school at the time. My aunty had called my mom at around 6:ooam and broke the news his death. I was already awake at the time since my family were already out our bed and we had offered our morning prayers some 30mins ago.
Since there was light at the time,me and my elder sister rushed to the sitting room and switched on the TV and every channel both local and international was talking about the death of the king of POP. Even though I was very young at the time, i instinctively knew that there wouldn't be anyone like him ever again. Before his death, I have heard countless stories about him from my father and others. His music alone was... Infact he was created for music... Hell ! I could watch MJ's music videos all day without even thinking of food. Well, he looked much better before the surgery, although I was told by my dad that he had a skin disorder at a particular time in his life.
Me and my sister were so engrossed in the news and documentaries about Michael's life and death that our mom had to scream at us to start getting ready for school.
The whole school was already agog with the news of MJ's death to the extent that the early morning assembly was delayed. And by the time we gathered, the first news that was announced by the student journalist was MJ's demise and once again all the students broke into a momentary uproar before the principal screamed at us to maintain order.
However there had been a student in our class who was absent. He was not just any student but the class rep himself. It was not until midday that information got to us that our class rep's dad had died too in the early hours of the morning.
But nobody seemed bothered . We were still talking about MJ and some of the boys had already started mimicking his famous "moon walking" albiet in a awkward and silly way . Other students were so engrossed in an old magazine that covered MJ's life's history. This was definitely unlike before when the class students would express deep shock whenever we hear of the death o f a parent.
Even our class teacher forgot to select a group of students that would be sent on a condolence call to the house of the class rep. No need to mention that this was the usual practice whenever a parent dies but the teachers were also talking about MJ at the office.
On our way back home from school, we still forgot to stop by the house of our class rep and commiserate with him over his loss. We all kept chattering about MJ's life and music till we got to the junction were we usually disperse to our various home.
It was on the next day that we only started thinking and talking about the other man's death. ...................
Life's isn't fair. And sometimes it would seem that death is also discriminatory. A rich or famous person is still given more priority even in death. People would always take extra time and energy to analyze and probe into the life of an influential person and could keep talking about them decades after their demise. Even the celebrities that are still breathing, alot of people online and offline wouldn't care investigating and talk about insignificant stuffs that they do everyday and how they live their lives.
But the life and death of an average man is like any other . Nothing more between the time he was born and the time he left the world, inscribed on a slab above his grave.
He'd be lucky if even his own family continue to tell others about his life in the next ten to fifteen years after his death. Even his memory might not even linger in his own extended family.
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Thank you for reading ♥️😁
The disturbing rate at which young people die of heart attack.
Grace had been at the dance floor for more than an hour now. It was her elder sister's wedding and she just couldn't contain her joy. Suddenly she turned around and saw aunty kemi smiling at her from where she was seated. Grace couldn't believe her eyes and she screamed . she immediately rushed to embrace the elderly woman.
This would be the first time in almost 10 years that Grace would be seeing her favorite aunty since she travelled to Europe. No one told her that she would return to the country for simi's wedding. Well, it was actually meant to be a surprise.
The two ladies were still laughing and in her state of excitement, Grace suddenly felt dizzy and missed a step. Due to the heels she was wearing, she suffered an unpleasant fall to the ground which twisted her ankle. The other wedding guests quickly surrounded her as she cried in pains. They tried to help her up but she couldn't walk as her ankle was very painful. So they had to take her to a house nearby where a doctor would later attend to her.
After her ankle had been treated and plastered, the doctor instinctively asked her if she were hypertensive and she said no. Just out of curiosity and experience, the doctor proceeded to gauge her blood pressure nonetheless.
Grace couldn't believe it when the doctor declared that she had a very high blood pressure. She was further perplexed when the doctor revealed that if she hadn't suffered this ankle injury and his attention was called upon, she would have returned home thinking that she was OK only for her to drift into coma in a few days later ......
Contrary to popular belief that an heart attack is a concern for the elderly, the rate at which folks below the age of 40 are succumbing to heart attack is quite disturbing. Infact, most times it comes without warning . what's worse is that some of it's signs which includes sudden and irregular palpitation of the left side of the chest accompanied by severe sweating are often ignored by young folks who most times dismisses it as stress and would rather take a little rest rather than getting themselves examined.
These are vital signs that there could be a momentary blockade of blood flow through the heart and this could lead to sudden cardiac arrest that might result to an abrupt stop of a heartbeat.
We all have heard about stories of students, athletes and performers who had suddenly slumped while in action and in some cases, become lifeless. The causes of sudden cardiac arrest in young people have always been linked to ( but not limited to) drug or substance abuse, obesity, sex enhancers, high cholesterol levels in the blood with little or no exercise, stress and eating habits. But in most cases, heart attack in youths could be congenital especially when it happens that the left wall of the heart becomes abnormally thick (normally it's thicker than the right side). In such a situation, the heart would be working extra hard in its task of pumping blood, thereby building a high pressure . Also, because some major valves ( e.g aortic valve) in the left ventricle could become stiff due to thickening, a high blood pressure could continue to build leading to angina (chest pain). This is normally common in folks older than 50.
If you are or you know someone who might be having chest pain that usually spread to the left arm and the back from time to time. Please don't hesitate to take that person to see a doctor and not any doctor but a cardiologist. It's also very important that one should be very honest with the medical expert because Information like the patient's health records, how frequent the pain occurs and wether there's a relative or parent who had suffered from a heart attack at any point in time would go a long way in making the condition very clear to the doctors.
Adapting an ideal lifestyle which includes regular exercising, reduction in alcohol consumption, quiting smoking and eating healthy also goes a a long way in the protection of a young heart.
Thanks for reading and continue to stay healthy 💝😁
I lived to tell the story: A near death experience
When I was 10 years old, I and my family had travelled to the countryside to see grandma.
Anytime she called, the old woman had always insisted that she wanted to see her grandchildren one more time before anything happens to her.
I and my other siblings had been very excited the day dad had announced that we would be travelling to the village since we were done with our examination.
There were three Rivers in my village. The first one was very small . It was a sacred river that was only used for spiritual cleansing. The second one was much bigger and provided all the water needs for the villagers. The third river was at the centre of the four villages that made up to clan. It was far more bigger than the other two and a prominent bridge was built overhead.
Grandma had always warned her grandchildren never to visit this river. "Apart from his beauty, it could also be dangerous, as little children could easily be carried away", she had said.
But these "scary" stories only made us the more eager to explore the river. Before we arrived at our village, we had crossed the bridge and I saw alot of people and children playing at the river and I had wished to join them.
Two days before Christmas, I,my siblings and cousins embarked on a journey to the big river after telling a lie to the elders that we were going to take our bath at the small river.
We kept running till we ran past the small river and laughed.
As usual, There were alot people at the river who were having fun. Some children were playing ball games in the water while others where playing rough. Everyone was happy. I told the other children that the setting looked like one of those scene in those foreign movies where people go to enjoy themselves at a beach.
We became more excited as we quickly undressed and flew into the water to join inthe fun.
A while later, my stepsister started swimming farther away from the rest us. Even though we were almost thesame age, I always had this false impression that I could always do better than her since I was bigger, even though the both of us were not that good at swimming. So, I stopped swimming and kept looking at her in a surprised manner. She kept swimming into the deeper parts of the water and came to a halt at a point I had imagine was not very deep since I could see most parts of her upper body.
She turned around and started laughing and waved at me to come join her. Without thinking, I started swimming excitedly without thinking. I swam in an irregular manner the popular butterfly stroke I had recently learned without even lifting my head to see where I was headed.
As soon as I reached where my stepsister was standing, I placed my hand on the back of her shoulders an d tried to assume a standing position too, but my legs didn't feel any sand underneath.
I became so alarmed that I clutched at my stepsister's arm so tight . And since I was bigger, she lose her balance and together we both drifted and fell deep.
It was then I realized that the area my stepsister was standing was not as shallow as I had thought. Actually, it was very deep and she only stood on a rock that was just few feet in width. And of course only one person could stand on it at a moment.
Twice I tried to bring my head above water but failed as my hand continued to wave above the surface in a desperate signal for help. I started to scream but water filled my mouth and throat.
Out of sheer willpower, I managed to lift my head above the water and I vividly saw my younger brother and cousins beckoning in a distressed manner to the other swimmers to go help me. But the other children didn't pay me any attention. Actually, most of the older children believed I was just kidding because it was quite normal for people to fake drowning just to fool others when they swam to deeper parts of the river....it was part of playing 😆
By the way, they must've seen me swimming towards that direction and they prolly thought I was a great at swimming and I could look after my self.
Folks! That was how I kept drifting downwards. By the time I drifted down again for the fifth time, I became too tired to bring out my head above water again. With the overwhelming force of gravity, the effort was just too much for me and there was no strength left in my body to bring my head to the surface again .
I started crying as I had never imagined that I was going to die so young talkmore of dying this way.... I continued to drop deeper into the recesses of the river.
Then out of the blue, I felt a strong arm wrapped over my body and the person propelled me upwards. I was transported some feet forward from my position till I reached the shallow parts of the water where my feet could now touch the ground.
By this time, my eyes were bloodshot and I began to violently cough out alot of water in a breathless manner. My cousins rushed towards me and carried me out of the river. Everyone surrounded me and my younger brother held me tight and began to cry.
Nearly at thesame time, everyone paused to look around for the guy who had rescued me but we couldn't find him. No one even saw him. No one knew him. News got to the village about what had happened to me but no one could even guess who the person that had saved my life was.
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My mother had always told me about the invisible angels who God had used in performing miracles in our life anytime a servant was in a desperate situation. I guess that would be the only plausible explanation.
Oh! about my stepsister, that one? Lol.... she fought her way out of the river through another route without much difficulties. And I would always think I was stronger! Lol.
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Thanks so much for reading friends ♥️
Really missed you all!
Beautiful people, Just wanted to say Hi. I have missed each and everyone of you. Remain blessed 🥰🥰🥰
Have you checked your Blood sugar levels recently ?
Few months ago, I was on a public transport on my way to get some stuffs from the market. The person seated next to me had been on a phone conversation for several minutes.
From what I understoodod from his discussions with the person at the other end, the young man had a diabetic mom whose condition was out of control to the extent that one of her legs had been affected. The doctor had said that it would have to be amputated in order to halt gangrene.
I already knew it had to be type I diabetes (insulin-dependent) but I wasn't sure whether the young man was aware that he's likely to acquire diabetes in the future since such type of diabetes is more of a genetic don'tition which is due to the failure of production of thr hormone insulin from its source.
In fact, he stood a 50 percent chance of having diabetes since one of his parent have the condition already. The other 50 percent generally depends on lifestyle habits.
Nevertheless, a young person who's family have a history of the disease can still prevent or at least delay the onset of the condition by:
* Avoiding smoking and heavy alcohol consumption
*Avoiding soft drinks ( it has been proven that they could be more lethal than alcohol in the long run)
* Excercising regularly. It doesn't even have to be vigorous, so long as one is consistent.
*Maintaing a balanced diet that includes fruits and veggies.
It is also imperative for one to constantly monitor their blood sugar level. Routine observance would help one quickly notice the slightest changes in the normal blood sugar and immediately take preventive measures in order to cushion the effect.
The normal blood sugar level is around the range of 3.5mmol/L - 7.8mmol/L.
A reading of about 11.0mmol/L indicates that the sugar level of the blood had spiked and one needs to be more careful.
13mmol/L to 15mmol/L translates to diabetes.
You could always divide by 18 to get the value in gmmol/L.
Unfortunately a lot of young people who have diabetes in their lineage are ignorant of the importance of blood sugar testing. That's the reason why someone might just suddenly develop diabetes even when they are sure that they hadn't been engaged in an overcomsuption of sugar over the years.
Type I diabetes can be chronic and it has no known cure. Unlike type II diabetes that could be reversed by eating low calories on a strict protein diet or by engaging in a marathon fasting for a week (although you still have to seek medical advice first In case of hypoglycemia ).
This is because type II diabetes is not found on a mutated gene in the family tree. It is only caused by the common added sugar in our diets like soda and junks. That's the reason why some people would hardly have diabetes no matter how much they consume junk. Instead they become as fat like @Kushyzee when he was a still a child 😆
This doesn't mean that such a person wouldn't suffer from other health conditions as a result of over indulgence.
But in the case of type I diabetes, the islets cells of langerhans that are responsible for the production of insulin in the pancreas can never be reactivated no matter how long you fast since they are already obsolete due to genetic mutation.
In fact, each time one try to fast for long periods, one would lose more energy and might later be hospitalized. This is because in the absence of insulin, the body cannot immediately metabolise glucose which is the number one source of energy again.
The female diabetes ward at any government hospital in Kano state is always filled with patients during Ramadan. Some housewives would never listen whenever they are warned not to fast due to their health conditions. 🥺
Hence, in the absence of insulin, the body would have no choice than to turn to secondary stores like proteins and lipids for its energy reqirements. This is the reason why patients with type I diabetes always tends to lose weight since the flesh that should be stored to improve the body's appearance are now been used as the immediate source of energy for his day to day activities.
So, the patient becomes weaker, especially when they haven't eaten. And even when a patient with type I diabetes eats, they could consume more food than normal (dysphagia), since they have to make up for the constant lose of energy from their body.
No need to mention that they tend to always feel hungry and dehydrated, since they urinate often and glucose ( energy) is always passed out in the urine.
..... By the way, insulin is an hormone: (hormone=chemical messenger ) that is responsible for the conversion of excess glucose ( sugar) in the blood into glycogen for storage in the liver and adipose tissues.
.....For a diabetic patient, glucose is been wasted in the urine since there's no insulin to help out.
Worse is that type I diabetes can attack a person at any time. Just imagine if one is diagnosed with this type of diabetes in her teenage years! I don't know if that person would live for another 10 years. Complications would definitely begin to come in no distant time. Conplications lije kidney failure
So , a person whose either parent or even an uncle is diabetic should check their blood sugar level at least twice a month as soon as they attain adulthood. It would help them take precautionary measures in the form of modification of their lifestyle, dieting and exercise in order to adjust the blood sugar back to normal or to a fairly normal level.
I once asked a friend whose father was disbetic wether he had gone to have a sugar test ( FBS, as it is popularly called ) recently. He replied that he had never had the test. According to him, he believes that if he goes to check at a pharmacy or a lab, they'd prescribe some drugs for him after the test, and he doesn't want to buy drugs.
I was shocked at such an ignorant mindset. Although, he plays football every evening and looks very fit. This is very good for him especially as he spends more than thirty minutes daily exercising on the football field.
Well, as long as he doesn't consume refined sugar from soda to bread, egg roll, meat pie etc. everyday, I believe he'd be alright.
A lecturer once revealed that a lot of young Nigerians are not aware that they already have diabetes till around 15 to 20 years later when the complications begin to manifest. This is because no one is even talking about the high levels of cholesterol that had accumulated in the body over the years as a result of the carbohydrate addiction and unhealthy lifestyle.
"***We should always take care of our body as it is the only place we have live".***
Thsnks for reading 💖💖
A woman shouldn't go out when it's just few days to her wedding
Yesterday, I spent my day with a friend who'se wedding would be coming up next Saturday. I and other friends had raised over a sum of $400 for her wedding. This didn't includes the money and gifts from some of her friends like me who reach out to her personally. I have known her for over 10 years, by the way.
Indeed, She had been very grateful and considered herself lucky for having such an amazing circle. But I didn't see this gesture as a big deal since it had always been what we always did for anyone of us who was getting married. She wouldn't be the first neither would she be the last to enjoy such support. She had also supported others too in the past.
We were about going to a mall to get some stuffs for her wedding when her phone rang. It was her mother and she was worried that she had left home for more than two hours. She told her mom that she was at my place and since her the woman knows me very well, she relaxed. Nevertheless, she ordered her daughter to return home in the next 30 minutes.
According to the older lady, a young lady whose marriage is just a few days away should always curtail her movements and outings, that's if she would be allowed by her parents to go out.
This wasn't the first time I would hearing this. Traditionally speaking, it is believed that a bride-to-be is most vulnerable at this stage of her life and the chances of her mixing with negative people who possess negative energy is quite high. Also, an evil eye might see her on the way and might decide to spoil the good that is coming her way by influenceing her marital life spiritually.
This is the more reason why in my parts of the country, a birde's family starts announcing the wedding of their daughter to the public just a week or two to the event. That's when everything have been organised and fixed up, both physically, financially and spiritually. When everyone is sure that nothing could go wrong.
Also, it is expected for the bride to shed tears on her wedding day and this is very popular in many cultures in the country. Naturally, one might think that the reason of her tears was because she would miss her father's home, her family and friends to start a new life somewhere else and with someone else.
But in out tradition, this has a deeper meaning. A bride should cry because it is believed that this would be the last time she would cry or be sad again. There would be absolutely no reason to cry again when she start living with her husband. Another way of saying that she would forever be happy with her husband as there wouldn't be any reason to cry again in her new home since she had cried enough on her wedding and in her father's house.
But we all know this is not always true 😆😆
In fact, some brides take this tradition so seriously that they don't mind ruining their makeup with tears . They wouldn't stop crying no matter how much they are consoled until they are sure that nothing would ever make them shed a tear again in the marriage. 😁
Well, I think it's quite ridiculous how some families still take these mundane issues so serious, for an event that wouldn't last up to 10 hours at most while they overlook more important and meaningful matters like building and maintaining a happy marriage and family life.
Thanks for reading 💝💖
The baby had haemorrhage
When i was still a school girl, my mother had a grocery shop just by the side a busy main road. After school hours, instead of going home, i'd rather stay at mummy's shop since it was much closer to the school than our home. I and my siblings would eat out lunch at the shop and remain there till around 7am when we all shall return home after mom had closed her business for the day. We would also do our homework, wash our uniforms and socks at the shop before going back to school the next day.
One day, I returned to the shop after school hours and was sitting on the customers seat outside, when an accident occurred in front of my me.
A lorry had collided with a motorcycle carrying a female passenger with a baby stripped to her back. No need to mention that the driver of the lorry was unhurt, but the three occupants of the bike were thrown over the hard road as soon as the bike tumbled due to the resulting collision .
The woman and the rider sustained a few bruises here and there. Unfortunately, the child's head had hit the tarred road since he was still strapped to his mother's back when she had fallen of the bike.
Passers-by who witness the accident hurriedly rushed to the scene to render all the help they could to the victims
The baby who was just a year old was obviously still alive as his eyes were wide open, but he refused to cry. Indeed this was strange.
My mom pressed, squeezed, pinched and tapped the child repeatedly but he didn't make any sound neither did he react. He kept staring blankly.
Both mother and child were rushed to the nearest hospital and the mother's bruises were treated promptly. But the doctor announced that the child situation was critical. He had sustained a serious trauma to the head which had resulted to an internal bleeding or haemorrhage. The little child was transferred to the state's hospital were he was admitted into the I.C.U
From what I heard, the child spent over two months at the hospital where he undergone major surgery. His parents had spent a lot of money to ensure his recovery but all to no avail.
After sometime, people began to pray for a miracle to happen as the poor child was just suffering. Some even wished that he should just die. You wouldn't blame them for feeling this way would you? They were just being logical. Alot have been spent already and the doctors gave very little hope of his improvement. So they thought it better for the child to go if he couldn't be healed.
At last, the child didn't survival and died before a third surgery. Not after his parents had passed through a lot of grief and emotional stress.
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Thanks for reading 💖💝
My first experience with Palm wine
Hello dear one. Grateful and happy to be blessed to see another new month of July. Wishing all of us all the joy and laughter that our heart can take.
Today's write up is inspired by an article of @Olasquare where he wrote about his funny experience with palm wine. You could read the full story **here** https://read.cash/@Olasquare/its-not-for-me-comedy-open-mic-39263748
I was 13 years old at the time. My father had received a call one early morning from he aunty. The old woman claimed she saw my late uncle the previous night. In her dream, the dead man was complaining to her that he was very hungry, and as a result, his spirit couldn't find rest. According to the her, The my late uncle needed my father to give him food.
My father asked some wise men on what should be done about his late brother's ghost, they told him to organise a big feast and invite the members of our extended family living in our state of residence to come eat. This was the sacrifice that would make the soul of my late uncle contented.
The date of the party was selected, animals were slaughtered and there was more than enough food and drinks for everyone.
With a childlike innocence, I asked my mother when are we goingg to take our uncle's share to his grave. Afterall, he was the one that said he was hungry since there was no food in the grave. Now others are eating and he's been forgotten.
But Mom replied that we wouldn't be going to pour any food in any grave. I asked her why and she said that " you wouldn't understand "
Later in the evening, I noticed a particular drink that was very distinct from the other soft drinks and alcoholic beverages. One of our tribal woman had brought more than a dozen of it to the ceremony.
I asked about the drink and the women told me that it's called palmwine. I was so excited that I had finally come across the popular palmwine that I always see in those nollywood movies. But mom refused me since it contained alcohol and alcohol was prohibited in our religion. This made me really sad that I suddenly lost interest in the fanta I was sipping.
That night, when all the guests had left the house and my parents had retired to their room, I stealthly crept to the kichen's refrigerator in search of palmwine and i was lucky to find just one bottle left.
I had two quick sips of the cold, milky fluid and it felt very refreshing. I was about to take another gulp when someone suddenly opened the kitchen door and I froze immediately.
I was relieved to see that it was my 10 year old little bro.
"What are you doing here ,Abdul?" I frowned at him.
In his sleepy state, while going to pee, the kid had wondered into the kitchen thinking it was the bathroom.
Out of disgust, I pulled at one of his ears slightly. That action was a big mistake..
Abdul's facial expression changed and he was about to start crying when I quickly stuffed his mouth with the opened bottle containing the palm wine.
This wasn't the smartest thing to do but i was so frightened he would wake our parents and i would be in trouble.
The little man was already sucking at the palm wine bottle as if it were a feeding bottle before I was able to snatch It away from his lips.
There was a funny expression of surprise in his wide eyes as he stuck out his tongue to lick his lips. It was evident that he enjoyed the taste but I quickly reminded the kid that this isn't fruit juice and ordered him to go back to sleep. once again, the little guy closed his eyes and was about to start crying and I again prevented him by filling his throat with palmi.
Each time he tried to wail, I shut it with more palm wine. That was the only brilliant idea I could come at the moment. He took three more mouthfuls of the alcoholic beverage and i was about giving him the third dose when I noticed that he was now calm.
I thought that my problem had been solved, not knowing that it had just began. As I stood up from a kneeling position to sit on the kitchen chair so that I could enjoy what was left in the bottle, Abdul began to stagger. He took two unsteady steps backwards and collapsed on the hard floor of the kitchen.
Laying on his back, eyes closed, mouth agape, arms fully stretched with only panties covering his waist region, my younger brother looked like a dead monkey.
Fear gripped at my chest and my hands were shaking till I dropped what I was holding. The sound of shattering bottle eventually broke the silence of the night.
Five minutes later, my father arrived at the kitchen, a traditional charm in his left hand, mom followed closely behind. I briefly looked at my father's face then i rested my gaze on my mother's since I feared her more. From the look in her eyes, she was visibly frightened . My parents prolly thought that a thief had broken into the house through a window.
"What's happening here!". Dad demanded.
" He-he-he dranked palmwine". I stammered
"He drank palmwine or you gave him palmwine?" Mom screamed .
She had now recovered from her shock and as she edged dad aside and came to stand in front of me, I had no doubt that it was going to be a hell of a night for me.
Renting an apartment because of female companionship
H Yesterday, I received an August call from a childhood friend. We haven't spoke or seen each other since the lockdown of 2020 so we had quite alot to discuss about. He had already completed his college education last year and was now chilling at home.
I asked him about his plans for the future and I wasn't too surprised when he said that he doesn't have any.
Oh! ....He did mentioned that the first thing on his bucketlist was to move out of his parents house. He had just recently gotten a commission of about $400 from the sale of a property where he played the role of a facilitator between the seller and a buyer. He was getting ready to rent an apartment with the said sum.
I asked him if his parents had been mounting pressure on him recently and he said no. He said something about "most of my friends are already living on their own". He also felt that the ladiess suddenly become disinterested in him when they find out that he still lives under his parents.
Well, if you ask me, I would say that there's something more attractive about a young chap or lady who lives independently in a decent apartment with an appreciable monthly flow of income. It makes a partner or prospective partner feel more secure, proud, submissive and more confident in them .
Nevertheless, from our conversation, the young man didn't sound like an ambitious fellow who craves his own privacy so as to challenge himself to be more productive by focusing more on his goals and avoiding distractions. He was merely under the influence of peer pressure.
I would have advised him to be more careful cause he already had a comfortable room for himself In his father's house. He was also not burdened with the responsibilities of household chores since he had younger siblings that takes care of that. From what i gathered, his parents are very supportive and his father was not the tough type. In fact, he was actively looking out for a job for his son at the moment.
It could have been better if he ploughs the $400 dollars in a profitable business while still under his father. I suggested investing in phone accessories. It could be a small business, but little things would grow big tomorrow. Als due to the epileptic power supply in the country, he could make more money by opening a small shop and offering to charge phones for the people on his street. As the business strives,he would be able to earn more income and save up more for the future. Even while still living at his porent's house, he would be spending more time at his shop. No need to mention that his Dad would be proud of him and would eager to go out of his way to give him more support.
But the young man merely laughed, he told me that such a business was not for him. He just felt that he needed more space and time of his own. It was not as if he had plans of getting married soon, so I wondered why the hurry?
By the way, he was around 26 years of age, so it wouldn't also be a bad idea if he secures an apartment of his own since we all will definitely leave our parents house one day, wether male or female.
I also think it's preferable if a man or a woman strives to live independently at a earlier age as this would motivate him or her to make bolder decisions and take bigger steps in life provided they lived responsibly.
Leaving all the comforts and privileges your parents house provides to start feeding yourself , paying for your own electricity and other services that never stops piling up without any reasonable backup plan or vision for the future is not very wise. Especially when you are aware that the economy of the country is very harsh and the sole purpose of your moving out is for dating or seeking the validation of the other gender.
Make I no lie, things cost ooo!
No we shouldn't. Yes we should! .. Dopamine
I have a course mate at the university who was addicted to fanta. To put it mildly, she could drink five bottles of fanta in a day even when she had only eaten once. In fact, she regularly wakes up in the middle of the night to get a dose of fanta from the refrigerator.
of course everyone was aware of her addiction to fanta but I was shocked when we were having a general conversation and she mentioned that her dad was diabetic
As a child of a type I diabetic parent, she had a fifty percent chance of acquiring the disease since type I diabetics is genetic. So, I wondered why she was hastening the onset of the disease by consuming large volume of sugar on a daily.
I was even more surprised when she also mentioned that she wa already aware of the fact that she might inherit type I diabetes from her dad. But sadly enough, fanta had been her favorite drink since teenage years and she was finding it difficult to let it go.
This makes one wonder why a person would continue to engage in a habit despite its destructive potentials in the future.
As we all know, an addiction could be very dangerous. In fact some people( religious folks) are of the opinion that it's a spiritual problem. But of course we all know, that its more of psychological.
The small limbic system located at the the middle of the brain is the most primitive area of the brain. It's the basis of all human actions amd achievements, be it love, passion,ambition, motivation, risk taking, bonding or winning. It's that part of the brain that abhors pain and seeks pleasure and by the time it clearly distinguishes pain from pleasure, it continually seeks that pleasure. For instance : the limbic system helps us to interprete ;
" Mother is good, Robber is bad, chocolate sweet, fire not sweet".
This is also the basis for all addiction.
There's a prominent part of the limbic system known as the reward center. The reward center in plane terms could be likened to a electric generator whose main fuel is dopamine , (you could call it a neurotransmitter to be more scientific ).
The reason why a lot of people would choose ice cream over avocado is because ice cream is more "rewarding" (tastier ) than avocado and this is the kind of pleasure your brain wants. And the more exciting the experience, the more there would be an increase in the volume of dopamine which further activates the reward centre and the more you would love to have another experience.
Even if fruits and vegetables are more cheaper and far more beneficial to your body, the individual would still want to choose a chocolate cake over and over again. This is because your brain keeps screaming " give me sugar! ", since it's more exciting to the brain, at the detriment of the rest of the body.
Basically, you are not really craving the junk foods neither are you longing for intimacy with an indecency actress. You are actually craving for continual stimulation of your reward centres even if you don't realise that.
So, even if your rational brain ( cerebral cortex ) keeps screaming :" stop! We are gonna have diabetes. Stop! We are going to have erectile dysfunction, your limbic system which houses the reward center doesn't care at the moment.
In fact it literally runs and dominates the the whole brain despite being smaller than the cerebral cortex. Therefore the the continuous production of dopamine invariably leads to higher stimulation of the brain.
No wonder dopamine is also called " the feel good chemical" and the " I got to have it at all cause " chemical.
This is also the reason why a lot of folks feel terrible after losing a bet, overeating or fapping. Because after the act, the dopamine levels of the brain have returned to the normal levels and the rational part ( cerebral cortex ) is now has the opportunity to operate again.
Hence, dopamine is popularly referred to as the addiction molecule since it could cause alot of structural changes in the brain that forms the basis of various addictions.
It has also been discovered that a continual increase in dopamine level beyond normal over a long time could lead to the underdevelopment and regression of the grey matter in the cerebral cortex. The grey matter is the seat of higher mental functions like wisdom, reasoning, creativity and confidence. That's why for addict, most aspects of his life are stagnated.
A lecturer gave us an instance that: if a person had been laboring under a dangerous addiction for a particular number of year's, then it's most likely that a good portion of his brain did not develop since the time he started the habit, wether five years or fifteen year ago.
Thanks for reading 💖💖
Why did you save your head?!
My father was a journalist who worked for the army, so my family had an apartment at Bompai barracks, Kano state, Nigeria. We lived in the barracks until the year 2007 when my Dad got a better offer.
Growing up in the midst of soldiers was an enviable experience. Contrary to popular belief, some soldiers are not as disciplined as claimed. Some of them would use some really filthy words in their conversation without caring wether a little girl who was returning from school was close by. And even if you say a greeting as you walk pass them, they wouldn't even respond as their brains had already been inebriated with hemp and other drugs.
Unlike the other soldiers, Sergeant Francis ( not his real name), wasn't a smoker neither was he a womanizer and he had never drank alcohol. Sergeant Francis was deeply introverted, he hardly talked and never laughed. In fact, other soldiers were afraid of him because he had a huge stature and was very hostile. At almost 40years old, he wasn't yet married neither did he have any girlfriend.
Sergeant Francis was also unkind to children. He could catch you and start beating you for no reason. So, we never played close to his room even if he was not at home .
At that time, there was this bully who was 13 years old, just a year old than I am. We were all playing one day when Bisi announced that hence forth, the other children should start addressing her as "aunty " since she was the oldest and biggest amongst us.
Well, I found this quite laughable because I had a 15-year-old cousin, Amina, who was living with my parents and I have alway called her by the name. So why would I address a 13 year old as "aunty". Out of cattiness, I called Bisi a disparaging name that the boys usually called her due to her gross weight. Then i ran away.
As she ran after me, i kept laughing at her cos I knew that she would get tired soon due to her stout stature .
I turned around at the last moment before something very terrible would have happened. More out of reflex than cleverness, I deflected my head slightly and the object flew passed me in close range and landed on the window of Sergeant Francis, smashing it to pieces.
Bisi had hurled a stepping stone that was almost the size of a man's head at me since she couldn't catch me. I turned around to look at bisi and saw that she had also frozen at where she stood. Another look at the stone told me more than anything else that if it had struck my head, I would be laying in a pool of blood by now. I was so terrified that I began to ran home.
I had been sleeping on the couch for more than an hour when an aggressive bang on the door woke me up. As I got to the door, I had a premonition of checking who the person was by looking through the window. As soon as I saw Sergeant Francis, my heart sank and I took two unsteady steps backwards. I turned around and ran to look for my mother at the backyard.
" Mummy, somebody is looking for you ", I said to my mother in a shaky voice.
I had been hiding in the bedroom for ten minutes when my mum called me twice but I remained silent.
" if you don't come out now, I will come to that room and break your head ", she threatened when she called me out the third time.
" Good a-aftunoon sir", I greeted sergeant Francis in a trembling voice when I walked into the sitting room.
With smoldering eyes and a thunderous voice, he screamed at me. " Bilqees, why did you break my window?"
I was shocked to hear this, maybe Bisi had already lied to him so i narrated the whole story of how the incident happened.
After I had finished, Sergeant Francis replied in an indifferent voice. "Why did you dodge the stone that was meant for your head?". "Don't you know that apples are better than oranges?"
It took me another seven years before I fully understood what he meant by that statement.
Mom apologised to sergeant Francis profusely but the soldier stormed out of our house without saying another word to me or my mother.
As soon as the soldier had left, mom dragged me by one of the ears and led me to her bedroom for judgment. As much as i tried to explain, mom insisted that she had warned me repeatedly never to play with a silly girl like Bisi who lacked proper home training. She accused me of getting her into trouble with "mad man" Francis and that was the last thing she wanted while living at the barracks.
I cried for almost an hour after mother's slippers landed on my bare back in ten quick successions.
Dad was told about sergeant Francis visit to the house and his reason for visiting. Luckily for me, my father was not as strict as my mother. As a highly educated man, a journalist for that matter, he never apIlied force on a child or anyone else. He always preferred talks and negotiations. So, he only criticized me for going out to play when I was so supposed to be at my homework, especially when mother had adviced me several times not to associate with a naughty girl like bisi
To cut the long story, I was so angry that i refused to touch my dinner. It was as if everyone was blaming me because I didn't allow bisi to crush my head with a rock
Thanks for reading. 💖💖
Special thanks to @Aimure for the sponsorship renewal. I appreciate your support dear. You are a true comrade 😁
The Spirit of Clairvoyance
If you are a Nigerian student studying at a federal university, you would agree with me that securing accomodation on campus is a most difficult process. The bed spaces are acutely limited compared to the number of students jostling for them.
when I finally got admission at the university, I and my cousin were adviced to save our self the stress of searching for an hostel accommodation. It would be better if we channel our time and energy in searching for a decent accommodation outside that wouldn't be very far away from the school. So, we didn't bother registering for the school's accommodation when the portal later became accessible, because we knew that the chances of acquiring a bed space would be very slim.
No need to mention that renting an accommodation outside the school walls was very expensive especially if the apartment had close proximity to the school. But as fate would have it, one of my contacts informed me that there was a vacant apartment just three streets away from our school. It's occupant's had moved out the previous day and Iif I move quickly enough, It would be mine before anyone else gets to know about it.
I quickly put a call to my cousin who was also a sophomore. We were both excited and together, we nott to check the place out..
The house was quite acceptable to live in but I was surprised when my cousin suddenly announced that there was no way we could stay there.
According to her, the owner of th property was an occultic man who had buried a pregnant woman in the premises for ritual purposes. And any tenant that lived in the house would definitely have his/her star and future compromised.
Honestly, this wasn't the first time my cousin would be sounding crazy. Several times in the past, she had told me that she had the ability to "see things", but I never paid her any attention. Even though I totally didn'tt believer what she had said about the house, she had succeeded in throwing such a huge fear into me that I lost interest in the apartment. Needless to say, I was angry with her throughout the week and the next for making us lose such a nice accommodation. If we had paid for it, we wouldn't have to spent alot of money on transportation due to it's proximity to the school.
There was this popular man around our street . Everyone loved him since he was a jovial and jolly good fellow. Me and my cousin hadn't seen him for over a month now. This was a man that comes to my aunt's shop on a regular basis either to buy stuff or just to play with us.
One day, he came around to the shop to get a new charger. We were pleasantly surprised to see him and we asked him where he had been all this while. He replied that his father had been very ill and he had to travel to the countryside to see how he was doing.
We talked about this and that for some minutes before the good man eventually took his leave.
I turned to my cousin as I was shocked to see her wiping a tear with the back of her left hand. I asked her why she was crying and she told me that this man would " kick the bucket" very soon. According to her, he has already been killed and eaten by his enemies in the spiritual realm and right now, he was only a walking corpse.
I merely laughed at this. This girl have started talking crazy again, I thought. At that moment, I had to tell her that it was hightime she put an end to all this silly permutaions as it was not only becoming more ridiculous, but also boring..
Barely two weeks later, I spotted the obituary poster of the same man that came to our shop the other day on an electric pole. The posters announcing his death were pasted up and down our street. From what I had gathered, he had slipped and fell while taking his bath and that had been the end of him.
I rushed home to inform my cousin about what I have seen and heard but she only gave me an i-told-you-so-look. I was so shocked and I asked her how was it possible she had known that the man would be dying soon. And again she replied that she had the "spirit of clairvoyance ". She had seen the man's death before it came.
Of course, such people who have the gift of sight are very rare and they also don't use it often.
Have you ever come across a person with such a gift?
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Thanks for reading 💖💖💖
A post Traumatic Stress Disorder( Her experience)
The first time I came across this term was when I was in junior high school. It was one of those late evenings when me and my dad wouldd remain in the sitting room and watch the aljazeera news/documentaries.Mom and my other siblings would have already gone to bed after getting the regular dose of their favorite Mexican drama.
After spending like another hour discussing issues in the news with my dad, i'd also retire to the other room, leaving my old man behind, whose attention would still be fixated on the news till around 2am.
That night, the documentary was centered around some young US soldiers who had just returned from the Iraqi war and were suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
"What does that mean? ", I asked my pops
I was told that the soldiers had been through a lot during the war and this had made their minds to develop great fears even after the war was over. Dad tried to explain the illness as best as he could to the comprehension of his 13 years old girl.
At that age, I found it quite funny that a soldier of all people should be afraid. According to what I know and was told about combatants, they don't fear anybody or anything, it was always the other way round.
Years later, I came to understand fully what the PTSD means and how it affects everyone irrespective of age, gender or profession.
Just yesterday, i was watching a favorite feminist TV show and the guest speaker was naratting a harrowing experience that occurred when she was around 15 years old.
Their resident had been attacked by armed robbers. She recalled how she had hid behind her mother when the robbers had threatened to kill her if her father refuse to give them the money they came tor. Fortunately, non of her family members were hurt as everyone had surrendered and cooperated.
But the robbery incident really shook her paychologically since she had never seen a gun in her life before talk more of a gun being pointed at her face. In fact as the only child in a rich family, nobody had even scream or scold her before as she always enjoy all the love and attention she could get both at home and in school. So, the encounter with the ruthless masked men caused deep emotional trauma in her mind.
She literally was a shadow of herself ever since. No longer the boisterous, happy and exuberant kid that her parents wealth had brought her up to be. She'd always wear the mournful and hungry look of an orphan who was uncertainty about where the next meal could come from.
Sometimes, she would wake up in the middle of the night with a loud scream after a terrible nightmare involving images of the armed men chasing her on a lonely path. And by the time her parents gets to her room, they'd discover that she had wet her pants.
Her grades in school were seriously affected too. In some test and exams, she would experience flashbacks and when this happens, her brain would remain blank till the end of the exam. These occurrences continued till when she was 18years old after visiting a handful of therapists and behavioral scientists.
Her mother had already developed a high blood pressure as her daughter's condition became a great source of worry to her.
Unfortunately, the perpetrators were never apprehended by the police as they didn't leave any clue behind.
Post traumatic stress disorder ( PTSD ) is describe as the inability to get over an horrifying occurrence that had happened somewhere in your past.
Depending on the level of the traumatic experience amd pscological damage, it could last for week, months or even years. In some cases it might even be lifelong and the victim might never heal. Such a person would might regularly or intermittently becomes triggered into a panic or sober moods when they become eventually exposed to instances that bring back these old but terrifying memories. ......
Thanks for reading. 💖💖
Her water didn't break !
Bola's pregnancy was really a great source of concern to her family. She was almost 12 months gone and yet to put to birth and this was really strange. The doctors had asked for a surgery to be done but her and her husband refused the idea.
For the past one month, Bolas mother and brother had been running from pillar to post in search of a solution for Bola's predicament but all their efforts were in futitily. Each place they went proffered a different solution from some other place they had gone to seek for solution previously and this made them all the more confused. Of course they knew better not to subject Bola to different untested local and spiritual remedies when she is in such a precarious situation. It is said that "Too many cook spoil the broth".
The doctors still insisted that an operation was the only possible and safest way out. But Bola's family wouldn't agree. Probably due to their superstitious, traditional or religious inclinations.
Bola's husband, David was also very worried. He had really spent alot of money in search for a solution but just like others, all his efforts proved abortive.
Bola's mother was now scared that David might become fed up with her daughter's problems and decide to send her back home. But David was not that type of man. In fact he had mentioned that he doesn't mind losing the baby just so that his wife could be free from the overwhelming physical stress and emotional trauma. According to him, his wife's life was more important as they still have alot of time to make babies in the future. It was not an easy choice but in a situation like this, one had got to choose the milder option.
Bola's mother was really glad to hear this kind of talk from her son-in-law. He was indeed a good man. David was an astute business man and ever since he married Bola, he had really done alot for her family . This made bola's mother felt very bad because he was now been denied of the joys and experience of fatherhood and she began to cry again.
Bola's brother was the superstitious type and soon he began to ask bola some deep questions. He suggested that his sister might have ditched a man in the past and the betrayed lover had decided to pursue a diabolical and evil vendetta against bola in order to settle the scores. But bola swore that she never cheated on any man before. As a matter of fact, david even confirmed that he met her a virgin. This made her family more worried and helpless because anywhere they went to, it was always said that it was a spiritual problem. "Who have I offended, why me, Lord?!" Bola cried out in deep pain.
A week later, Bola's mother received a phone call from her son in law that bola's water had finally broke and on their way to the hospital, she had given birth in the moving vehicle. But unfortunately, the baby had died.
It was indeed a tragedy and everyone both family amd friends felt very sorry for Bola who was inconsolable. But David, bola's husband maintained an indifferent frame of mind. He kept thanking God for sparing his wife's life despite everything. The fact the he had only lost a baby and not his wife too filled him with gratitude. Bola's mother amd brother were really moved by the unshaken devotion and loyalty that David had for his wife. He was indeed a good man!
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Thank you so much for reading
Not a cash cow!
Ade was a 32 years old unemployed bachelor living in one of the suburbs in lagos. Recently, he visited his elder brother femi, whose wife had just gave birth to a bouncing baby boy. Femi had observed that his brother had lost a lot of weight and looked very ill. He asked him what was the matter who him and ade responded that he doesn't know.
Before his brother left the house, he instructed him to go the the hospital for a medical examination. The test results revealed that ade had a kidney disease. The doctor had said that he would have to go through some treatment amd there was possibility of a surgery too. The disease had been progressing for a long time and his condition had degenerated.
Femi was really heartbroken as ade was his only brother and he must help him. The first thing he did was to send ade back to the hospital again to get the correct bill of all the treatment. The hospital bill was a little above $4,000 dollars which was very expensive. But femi must save his brother's life. So, he issued a check of the exact amount to ade the next day.
Three weeks later, femi was shocked when he discovered that ade did not use the money for the treatment. All this while, he had been making use of a traditional herb which he bought from a local medicine woman at a nearby market. The old woman had promised him that his disease would be cured before one month of using her herbs. She even boasted that her herbs had cured more deadly diseases.
Femi became very furious at his brother and he scolded him real hard. But ade was the stubborn one. He told his brother to leave him alone. After all, it was his health and his body and he has the right to take care of himself in whatever way he chose. Femi thought he was right, so he asked him what he had done with all the money he gave him, but ade simply hissed at his brother and walked out on him. Femi wasn't very surprised at this, his younger brother had always been ungrateful towards him no matter how much he assisted him.
When femi got home, he told his wife how ade had behaved amd she was really disappointed. Before his younger brother told him about the ailment, femi had planned to use the $4,000 out of the $5,000 he had in his account to expand his businesss. As a married man, he also had a lot of responsibilities to take care of. But he decided to help his brother first, because he believed that it was the right thing to do.
He had no doubt that ade had squandered the money again. This wasn't really the first time. Twice in the past, he had given ade $500 dollars to start up a business instead of remaining unemployed. But ade had always been a lazy fellow who lived a reckless lifestyle. He would rather spend any money that comes his way on alcohol and call girls. Femi had no doubt that it was his bad living habits that brought this terrible disease upon him.
Two months later, femi received a call from one of ade's neighbor that his brother was found unconscious in his room and had been rushed to the state's hospital. When femi went to see his brother, he was a very sorry sight. His wife who went along with him began to cry as soon as she saw how bad ade situation was.
The doctor informed femi that his brother's situation had really deteriorated and the hospital was now demanding almost doubled the initial amount before they commence treatment. It was obvious that the local herbs that ade had relied on had failed. According to the doctor, it even increased the osmotic pressure of the kidney.
At home, femi's wife kept mounting pressure on her husband to raise money to save his brother's life. But ade insisted that he had other responsibilities, he believed that he had done more than enough for his brother as far as family was concerned. It was not his fault that the younger man continued to foolish.
Of course, femi was not particularly a rich man neither was he a "cash cow". He also couldn't turn himself to money because of an ungrateful and irresponsible younger brother. But his wife wouldn't stop talking about ade and would cry every night and even refuse to allow her husband to touch her.
Ade died two days after femi had agreed to sell his land in order to raise money for his younger brother's treatment.
Thanks for reading......🥰🥰🥰
@Bilqees
