Black Hole
*If you're someone with anxiety or depression this might cause a trigger so can skip or have someone next to you read this with you.*
Have you read the story entitled "My heart is in a black hole?" It's all about a teenage boy suffering from depression. He had an abusive dad and after his mom and dad got divorce his dad remarry and became the dad he wanted before, a loving and caring father to his family. One of the factor that contribute for his mental health to get worse. This boy no longer sleep in his bed instead he sleep inside his closet. He put so many positive post it across his room that should help him motivate himself to stay and live another day. He found himself at the top of the building looking down trying to jump several times. On that building he found the girl who became on of the special person in his life. She brought this girl to his favorite spot an abandoned lake with a depth no one knows about. It said that any one who tries to check the bottom of the lake never make it back to the surface. Some say they found a parallel universe and travel into it that's the reason why body was never recovered. The boy tried several times to check the bottom of the lake but reality snap him back at the very last minute and that's one of the reason why his still alive. Having a girlfriend aware about his mental health and a family by his side sounds like a good reason to leave. I thought it's already a happy ending. But before the story ended the boy still choose to end his life trying to find the bottom of the lake which he called a Black Hole. This story for me is not suitable for someone with depression, anxiety and any mental health. It may become trigger but for someone who wanted to understand mental health issues this is an eye opening story.
I always say that kids now a days used the word depression and anxiety to explain their sadness when it's a totally different case. For me being sad is the feeling of getting hurt where you end up crying your heart out. That pain in the heart that strikes like bullet and the feeling of not getting up in bed and just wanting to stay without food and trying to do all sort of things to forget the sadness. I have so many friends diagnose with depression and they're brave enough to open up with me in regards to their issue. What they say is like the saddest thing I ever heard. They say depression is the feeling of living not for yourself for the sake of living itself. No tears to express emotions some, have smile to cover the pain. People still eats what they want not really what the food taste like. Chew it like a task they need to complete in a day. Some party and enjoy the day with their friends and family, after the end of the day they directly stay in bed staring at the ceiling still thinking about dying. That soulless eyes and numb bodies, that empty stomach and blank mind is how they describe it. Living feels like an obligation for them, to make sure that every one around them won't be affected with their own issues. They tried so hard everyday doing the same routine without enough motivation to leave. And the word dying never go away from their minds.
Some people don't realize what depression is. Especially in the country where I live in this was never taken seriously. They call it being crazy or people just call it "drama'. Seeking assistance for some experts advice feels like a sin, You'll be called out different names if they knew your suffering from it. They say it's a going to be a shame to your family if you acknowledge the fact that you're experiencing depression yourself. Take it so lightly that the rate of teenage committing suicide sky rocketed ever year. People call it excused not accepting the fact that they're one of the factor that stir up the pain. They never educate themselves to better understand what mental issues are.
If you're someone who has a friend or family experiencing depression please know that they need you. Please be there to support and encourage them. Let your ear be their outlet of emotions and your hug as their source of strength. Help them vent out and encourage them to live for a better life. Help them run away from those nightmares and together build a dream full of happiness. Thank them for trying everyday and for staying alive.
If your one of the people I mentioned whose experiencing depression, please know that you are not alone and never your fault to be that way. It's never wrong and what you feel is totally valid. Please try to help yourself and seek assistance from experts if your not comfortable sharing it with your friends, Never feel ashamed of what you feel because you have all the right to feel that way. Please don't run away and I hope you have the courage to face what ever problem your having. And lastly, Thank you again for fighting to be with us today. I love you remember that.
Slow Phase
People now a days seems to be in a hurry. They seem to do things fast wanting to achieve great result with small amount of effort. They thought success is just a matter of luck and not getting what they want is unlucky. Social media now a days are like a show off program. Where people can post what they have and some lie about it just to brag to make themselves more superior than others. The #blessed sounds ironic.
Luck, for me is a big word to describe success. It sounds like "miracle" to me. Some people earn success at a young age and they deserve the world luck for it. People born with a golden spoon on the other hand is a different case since they didn't work for what they have, they have it because of their parents success. What I mean is there are so many kids now a days whose using their skills and talent to achieve their goal and dreams at a young age and you can tell that they really work hard for it. Some gave up their sleep, seeing their family and friends and even gave up the joy of being a kid. Social media is one of the platform that help people achieve their goal no matter what age you are. There are so many kid influencer, gamer and you tuber who earns 10x than adult. There are kids who learns bitcoin at a young age for fun and now a millionaire. It take not just guts to have what they have right now, it requires hard work, passion and support from people surrounding them.
We tend to envy people whose more successful than us. We tend to question ourselves thinking why we don't have it or why we're on the same position where we at regardless of all the hard work we did. We tend to question Gods plan and love and think we're worthless or not good enough. We feel demotivated and hurt and depressed thinking about it. We became pessimistic and question ourselves even more that attracts more negative results. It affect not only our mindset but our relationship with our friends and family too. Whether you realize it or not if you have negative thoughts you attract people with negative thoughts or sometimes affects them unintentionally. Like for example, A father going home having a bad day at work shout at his wife for not having the dinner ready, then the wife saw her kid crying in shocked but shout the kid to stop her from crying instead of talking to her calmly. The kid then keep that incident in her memory and develop hate towards her parents. And then as time goes on, that kid might do it to her future family.
Life will be more easier with an optimistic mind. We need to surround ourselves with positive people uplifting our spirit to do good even more and be happy. The feeling of contentment brings happiness too. Let's all feel blessed and share our happiness with others. Happiness like what they said is definitely a choice. A single mistake and failure doesn't define you instead that should motivate you to do better at what you do. To achieve greater result means you learn to accept that not every day is a sunny day, rainy day comes one or thrice but that only balance your life. You just need to learn to enjoy the rain and dance with it, your music is the beating of your heart. Let your feet dance with the rhythm of the droplets of the water dripping from your face, the plants and trees. And then after the rain enjoy all the shining waters that surround you. Remember those people who dance with you and encourage you. Be grateful and look above and see the rainbow that symbolize God is smiling next to you.
To the people out their having the same thought as I, remember this. The line in the palm of our hand are all different. That only means that our destiny and the process of achieving our goal differs from one another. Life is not a race, we need to trust and enjoy our own process. Let us all be grateful of everything that we have as of today. Let's not compete with anyone aside from ourselves. Lets not envy others for what they have instead let's be happy for them. Let's all embrace our flaws and learn from all the mistakes we had. Let's all take our time and enjoy our own journey and experiences. Success at an older age is still success, that doesn't make anything less. Success are measured with the amount of hard work and efforts, not the time you spend or time you had before you achieve it. Let's all learn to be happy with every ones success and support each other. That will make our world even more beautiful.
Power Interruption Dilemma
It's been 6 months now since we decided to stay in our province in Albay, Philippines. When Pandemic started I'm in the city working as a healthcare advocate. I assists Patient in America over the phone with regards to their concern in their supply for their CPAP machine (device used for patient with sleep apnea). My task is to contact their insurance in regards to getting their benefits and so forth. We were advise during Pandemic as precaution to stay at home and have our job as Work at home setup. So taking the chance, We decided to go home in our province and spend time with our family while waiting for this Pandemic to be over. We no longer worry about rent, travel expenses and long distance call with our family since we're now together.
Unfortunately, power interruption is one of our dilemma. Yes, schedules were set by the Organization responsible for supplying electricity but interruption happen almost every day. Sometimes it's a 6 hours interruption to eight to eleven hours during the day which is very inconvenient since it's summer. During the night there's also a four hour interruption that affects employee working from home like me who rely with internet and power supply for my computers. It's been a huge problem now because we might be forced to go back in the city and report to our office just because there are organization who failed to do their job giving you one of the necessity that you've been paying for aside from the taxes taken from your salary. Electricity now a days is one of our necessity, we pay bills just to make sure it won't be cut or interrupted and getting these inconvenience is totally unacceptable. We been hoping for a resolution and explanation but all we got is a more higher bill and bill disputes that's not being taken care of.
Social media became a platform for dispute and escalations since most of the people living in this province raised their concerns and rants on their social media account. Moreover, issues about power interruption don't only steers controversies but also arguments among community divided by their beliefs and principles. Some approve to the power interruption to secure a better service in the near future and some are totally against since they know that the service that they're paying for is not returned the way we expect it be. People are divided on this small province during this pandemic because of this issue.
In a time were people need be one praying for a better and safe world during this crisis, issues like this are the reason why conflicts arise among us. We need to be one to have a better result, but unfortunately we can never erase the fact that in the world we living like what they say "we're on the same ocean but we're not riding the same boat. Some boat are considered ship; strong full of supplies and will totally last on the ocean. Some are made of wood; still surviving with skills and hard work can survive but still unsure until when and how and some boat are made of papers; Never had the chance to survive even in the beginning of the ride." Let us all be considerate during this time. Power interruption is a minor issue but let us all put ourselves in every one shoe. You may not see this as a major problem but for some it does. Some rely to it as their source of income to survive. Let's all meet halfway and try to be more understanding during this time. I always pray for every ones safety and I'm still hoping for a better future without this pandemic and I know at the end of the day we all wish the same.
Been in a relationship for more than 6 years now. People ask me questions on how we stayed together this long but to honest I'm not really sure how to answer them. Our relationship is far away from being perfect. We argue a lot and we experienced so many difficulties to be able to last this long. One thing that I can probably say to everyone wanting to last like ours is to be patient and understanding. I know it's a little cliché to say things like this since it's one of the basic fundamental of relationship but sometimes on a long run that's what everyone forgot. So always go back to the basic and let yourself realize your reason for being with him or her on the first place.
Hi,
I'm a newbie in read.cash, Want to try it to divert my attention to something productive rather than spending time on other social media platforms. Wanted to earn extra by posting articles and thoughts. I'm also looking forward to meet new friends and learn from them. Stay safe every one!
@BaNANA18