Writing about Writing

It’s been more than a year since I’ve started this escapade. Writing whenever I can. Writing whenever I can’t. Writing when I feel lazy writing. And writing every time. You could say that writing has replaced much of my other hobbies like crocheting, sewing, reading for longer hours, and many more.

But writing has always been a good exercise. It makes my brain work like never before. And guess what? There has been a very significant improvement for my essay writing at school. I could say that it changed my life forever.

Before indulging in writing, I’ve been an avid fan to four or five bloggers. I would read their articles over and over many times in one internet session. During my first months of writing, I noticed that I have borrowed their languages and voices. But I guess that is just natural in this kind of endeavor.

During the initial take at different platforms, I’ve fearlessly just put articles out into the open. Something big happened to my life that it was never the same before anymore. I’ve become bolder with publishing my articles. I didn’t care anymore if people read it or not or if people taunted it or not. It mattered not anymore whether there were grammatical errors or not.

Of course I would still review and check for errors but most of the time, once I’ve breathed my thoughts into the canvas, I would just publish it and be done with it. I still try to go over my article even after it was published.

I would receive comments from someone who has been my inspiration and he would remark how I’ve improved so far. However, I can’t stop doubting myself as I discovered that you could be excellent one moment and be equally sucky the next. So all there is right now is to continue writing.

There were times when writing would seem more like a chore and sometimes it would just come to you and you type nonstop on your device. Whatever device you’re using you just keep on typing.

I received an offer one time to write for a website but I declined because I really didn’t know what to do before. And I was not joking. Besides, I am still not to write for others. I am my own writer. A tiny bit of pressure and I might not be able to make it. So let it just be that I write here on this platform.

Initially I would breath out poetry for most of my writings. I was constantly amazed at how I could compose such endless poetry and proses. That went on for months. Gradually I noticed a decline in my poetry writings. I shifted my tone to simply just writing.

There were moments that I would start writing out a plot but those were mostly just very very short stories. Those that you could read for just less than 10 minutes. Well, those were genetic I suppose but I has been a good start.

These days, I write mostly for this site, for economic reason and trying my luck always with the al.

Thankfully I’ve partaken in the blessings. I will be grateful forever.

Moving on, I believe I will have to further this into some form of career. We never know what would happen next. At the moment I am a teacher, the next years I’m not sure. Though I have always imagined myself in the academe. But I never dreamt of become boss or principal or admin. I like to just be a regular teacher or professor. Or simply one who earns a regular income.

What is more important for me is learning. There are those who focus more on money than anything else. I’d like to believe I have a balance with things. Though honestly during this pandemic, I’ve neglected some of the beyond minimum duties that I usually render to students and to the department. Someday, babawi ako. But of course right now I really can’t be so charitable with my time, thinking that I also have kids to attend to.

I would hear some retort sometimes from my first saying, “You only know how to write.”

Well, at least I write instead of simply sleeping. But I get his point. They’re resentful sometimes with the amount of time I invest in writing. There are different days. Very different. Some days are like this while other days are not.

I gently remind my first son to speak more gently especially when talking to older people. We still put that word ‘respect’ into our vocabulary. If not, we won’t be blessed. Ever.

There really is something with respecting adults/elders. When you obey parents, blessings abound. Now I understand why there is such commandment of obeying parents before the amendment of it by Jesus. Jesus summarized the 10 commandments into doing unto others what you want others do unto you. But it still applies that kids should obey their parents. Or more generally, a child obeys his/her parents.

My son would hover over me and read what I write. He would be proud of it for sometimes and resentful the next. But most of all, he seem to learn the idea that writing is good most of the time. I told him to regularly right on his journal. But I guess he still wants to play more.

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