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Avatar for wakeuplincs
2 years ago

It’s understandable that my last child occasionally cries during the night. I was already conditioned for that. Even if it sometimes make me haggard, I already accepted that it was part of parenting.

But my second son. He’s already more than 5 years old but he would still put his hands on my breasts, he would embrace me even though it's not cuddling time, and would hold my face to let me see his face to see what he’s requesting, and would cry really loud if hurt emotionally.

At least the old scenario was gone. That scenario wherein he and his younger sister compete for my attention during the night and they would bother the neighborhood because of their cries and whines. The situation improved a lot when their father finally agreed to be gentle with the boy.

But then I can’t help but sigh because the child is really very emotional. Not spoiled, but just very attached and sensitive. He doesn’t want to be teased in front of others, and take anything as an insult to him most of the time.

The only way to effectively communicate to him is through talking to him really patiently. If you got angry with him and you didn’t explain why, he would ask you over and over why you scolded him.

“Apay mo siyak ung-ungtan, Mama?!” (Why did you scold me, Mama?!)

Even if it was his fault if you disciplined him in a rough manner, he would take it against you. But when you sit him down and look him in the eye and really talk to him like an adult, then he would soften up.

“Haan ko ar-aramiden manen didjay, Mama? Ta bad?” (I will not do it again, Mama? Because it’s bad?)

Then I would respond, “Yes.”

If you do it that way, then he hums away either going to his playmates or doing errands. Of course in a good mood.

He would volunteer to fetch water in his 1.5-liter coke container. If he likes to eat then he would ask me for some coins then he will go buy eggs, I will prepare it as sunny side up (not sunny side because we turn it upside down). But of course, the other two children will have to have their share. For the sake of fairness.

But if needed, because he is still a child, after all, I would get physical with him and spank him. If he knows it is his fault, he would just accept the scolding.

Lead image from Unsplash

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Avatar for wakeuplincs
2 years ago

Comments

Your second sone has the same attitude with my younger when he was still a child. But it is really good to hear that you really know when to scold him and that he accepts his fault. I love the way how you disciplined him. ☺️

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2 years ago

Oh... Haha. But it's really challenging. There were still instances where I was in my beast mode and I would be like a monster.

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2 years ago

Haha may you will really get on that point for some time. My mom is like that actually din kasi. Minsan tiis tiis pa eh. 😬

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2 years ago

Oh, so there is some improvement with D2! Hopefully, it will not take long for him to outgrow being too emotional. What happens when he has to go to school, and he remains to be very sensitive? So, he needs to be prepared for the outside world, where people can be quite harsh.

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2 years ago

Haha, yes D2! Thank you for remembering!

That's right, he has to outgrow it. But at least, he is not that sensitive with some of his playmates. Cousin playmates. Because he knows them. But with other people, he tends to show his sensitivity.

I do hope they learn some diplomacy and self-control (emotional aspect).

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2 years ago

We wish! It has a lot to do how they are raised at home.

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2 years ago