Go on with life in hope!

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2 years ago

Introduction

I found a draft of article. It is still to be finished. I have drafted it four weeks ago. I totally forgot about it.

During that time, I felt very tired of the things that has been happening to my life and to my family. I have to say that I was trying to appease myself from all the pressures.

The Draft

I’m tired battling with people who see me as someone worthless. Having been regarded as such for a long time has never been easy. Your desire for acknowledgement is draining the energy out of you to the extent of forgetting what has been making you happy. And I just woke up one day and realized there’s more to do than be affected by such people.

I realized that, it’s not within my control how these people see me. Doing such act of winning them is futile with my current mindset. Respect is earned and the moment you lose control of yourself you lose. We can never command respect if in the back of others’ minds we’re still being taunted.

If you can’t take it, better leave that person. But even in leaving you have to consider millions of things in order for peace to reign. You’ll never receive a blessing if you leave without regard of the present situation. So you balance and do what you can to minimize disruption. If possible, make amicable settlements.

The problem during that time I was writing is I lacked the spirituality that I am having now. I know I still have a long way to go but at least now, I am more resilient and I am stronger.

Amendment

The thing is, I also have a fair share of being disrespected. Not to incriminate myself, but I also failed to do my part. Now I talked to the person whom I am feeling so bad about. We agreed on being more respectful with each other.

It really felt hell to be disrespected and taunted. Even though the person is not telling it to my face, my back could feel and hear it. I confirmed my feelings when someone told me I really was being trashed talk behind my back.

It really hurt. But then I have to reflect and came to an understanding why such is the case.

I decided to simply do the best that I can.

I realized that the more I feel low self-worth I am being regarded lowly as well. But when I am confident and I am clear with what I want and I show authority, it follows that I feel regarded better and I feel my authority over others. I don’t abuse it so to say. I know my place and I know how to bow down as well.

Time and time again

Time and time again that I realize His might. Time and time again that I realize He is the only one who can really help me. Time and time again that I realize there’s no one ever that will fix my life but Him.

But it is not easy. There’s so much to change in myself so that I will be helped. I remember that there should be internal healing. For whatever that I am going through inside me, I have to get cleansed up first before I could be able to help others as well.

Eating Spiritual Food

Even if I will repeat this over and over in my blogs I will not cease. It is because this is the only food that can give eternal life.

I find it ironic that I feel wary of posting about Godly things here. If we can be tipped by random things we post, why should we feel hesitant in posting spiritual posts? Besides, aren’t we helping more when we are creating inspirational posts?

I do not know with you but that is the most ironic thing I could feel.

Allow me to end this article with this:

Go to church. They say it is not about our religion. They say, religion will not save us. But what do we know? It may be true that religion won’t be able to save us but practicing our religion will be some steps we take in order to be saved. In whatever religion we dwell, if we try our best to study the truth and apply it with our lives, then there would be no reason for us to not be saved from the pains of struggles, whatever aspect that is. So don’t feel upset if people persecute you. You love yourself and your family so you try your best to do the right thing. Let us all respect each other. If we don’t go to church, what will happen? That I do not know the answer. I still lack knowledge for so many things. That is the reason why I go to church. I am not perfect. I am a sinner. But those are not my excuses to be sinning again and again.

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