Doing more for my writing

Writing. For as long as I could remember, the very act of writing has fascinated me so much.

So much so that I have stalked favorite local writers and made effort to make friends with them.

However, during the early part of my childhood until shortly after college, I branded myself as a poor writer.

I have always considered myself a bad essay writer and my strength only lies in manipulating algebraic equations.

The good news is, that I finally saw hope when I befriended someone who would one day encourage me that I could as well write and publish.

I always thought of writing to be a big thing. But if I wished to write, I have to see writing, not in that way but to start small and have goals with it.

I started seeing writing as something that people use to express and talk about something. I started doing what I thought was undoable and found myself unstoppable in writing.

I questioned myself for being always the wimp in the earlier years of my life until after graduating from college.

Why didn't I at least attempt journalling or scribbling or doing my writing in secret so that no one would be able to see it? I was a secret keeper with sorts of things after all.

Thanks to the people who saw writing as a thing for almost anyone. We all do have something to say to the world, meaning that, we should always at least have a chance to have a go at it.

Now, I write almost every day and I could see it already as an integral part of my being. With writing, I can talk almost about anything I wish to take on.

Even if it were not to be published, I could still write for the sake of getting things out of my head.

But then the time came when negativity struck me. I, once again, thought that writing wasn't just for anyone after all. And that I did not have what it takes to be one.

I had to shake off the negativities and was laughing at myself for thinking such thoughts.

I know that we can't always help to have such thoughts in this journey of writing. At some point, we feel discouraged, at other times we may compare ourselves with others.

But as they say, we shouldn't be comparing anyone with anyone. And that comparing isn't always a good thing. Most of the time, it is harmful to one's confidence.

There are still so many questions I have for writing but then I find no time at the moment to research them.

Just this morning, a thought occurred to me. I should not just sit down and talk about things that I thought or observed. I should put in more effort to research a bit and do more for my writing.

I should try fulfilling my wishes before if I could at least write a novel, maybe, not really for anybody else's consumption but solely for my satisfaction. That at least I have done what I have always wanted.

Thinking back, I did try to write something in my notebook. And my friend accidentally read it. And she said why don't I continue. So I did try to write in my earlier years after all. But that was it.

I didn't do that again ever. So now, I want to be more thoughtful and imaginative. And I can always pick the time or moment that I would write. No one is going to pressure me and I am not letting myself be pressured.

I also have to strategize what I do so that when writing I wouldn't drift away so much from the topic I wanted to talk about. That happens almost always especially if I am using a mobile phone to write.

This morning, I told myself that instead of simply writing the way I do, I should at least put more thoughts into it and try to read more for the sake of learning and gaining more insights.

Lately, with the demand of my work, I just write without making time for reading.

I told myself that if I could put myself to buy a Yellow Cab pizza, then I could also buy a book at the book store.

I find myself unable to last long in front of an electronic copy of books and I am irritated by some features of ebook readers. Thus, I should at least set aside something for buying books.

So as we write, we also learn. As we write, we grow. As we write, we can discover more not only about the world but also about ourselves.

I have to acknowledge that this platform has given me so much motivation to write. No matter how much we deny it, we end up writing more for income.

With the prospect of this site having its fund gone, we should at least try to give back to the community.

I suggest that those who are able and not on a tight budget, we can maybe do some sort of contributing BCH and putting funds together.

The goal is for everyone to keep writing. Maybe, it is to keep inspiring especially new ones to continue writing.

I do not know but that is the idea. A chance for philanthropists maybe? Or, you know, for people like me who have received big help from this platform. I am thinking of setting aside something that I can give back when the time comes.

Best wishes to all of us!