@silvermontagne 10 June 2023 more from that month

Well, come to my 30 years of experience  Intro music: playing  "welcome to the black parade by my chemical romance,  hope - nf" Welcome to the 30 years of exiting on this planet Earth.  I did nothing special for the past years to look back. Not worth to reflect my work as a creative person. I regret that I don't take the risk  To make a piece of reminiscence I let my fear, doubt, and overwhelming feelings wreck on  These hinder to try and create. Always wanted to but not stepping on. As NF - Hope said  *30 years you've been draggin' your feet* *Tellin' me I'm the reason we're stagnant* *30 years you've been claiming you're honest* *And promising progress, well, where's it at?* *30 years of runnin', 30 years of searchin'* *30 years of hurtin', 30 years of pain* *30 years of fearful, 30 years of anger* *30 years of empty, 30 years of shame* *30 years of broken, 30 years of anguish* *30 years of hopeless, 30 years of (hey)* *30 years of never, 30 years of maybe* *30 years of later, 30 years of fake* *30 years of hollow, 30 years of sorrow* *30 years of darkness, 30 years of (...)* *30 years of baggage, 30 years of sadness* *30 years of stagnant, 30 years of chains* *30 years of anxious, 30 years of sufferin'* *30 years of torment, 30 years of (wait)* *30 years of bitter, 30 years of lonely* *30 years of pushing everyone away ('way)* I need to step back and think about these lyrics which I can relate to  Will I continue my next years to come like this?  What will I gain to stop this cycle?  Take the first step and did not continue? Worse. Right My Chemical Romance - Welcome to Black Parade  wrote *--------- He said, "Will you defeat them, your demons* *And all the non-believers, the plans that they have made?* *On and on, we carry through the fears (Oh, ha, ha)* *Disappointed faces of your peers (Oh, ha, ha)* *Take a look at me, 'cause I could not care at all* *----------  Do or die, you'll never make me* *Because the world will never take my heart* *Go and try, you'll never break me* *We want it all, we wanna play this part* *I won't explain or say I'm sorry* *I'm unashamed, I'm gonna show my scar* *And give a cheer for all the broken* *Listen here, because it's who we are* *Just a man, I'm not a hero* *Just a boy who had to sing this song* *Just a man, I'm not a hero* *I don't care* NF - Hope reflected,  *I'm a prime example of what happens when you* *Choose to not accept defeat and face your demons* *Took me 30 years to realize that* *If you wanna get the opportunity* *To be the greatest version of yourself* *Sometimes you gotta be someone you're not* *To hear the voice of reason* *Having kids will make you really take a step back* *And look in the mirror* *At least for me, that's what it did, I* I need to rebuild, at least I try,  I need to defeat my own excuse and lies. I need to create, coz at least I give a good fight.