the suicidal girl pt. 1

WARNING: THIS WORK IS PURELY FICTION. ALSO, PLEASE BEAR WITH THE TOPIC ABOUT SUICIDE. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.
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The story of a girl who is looking for someone who she will write her suicide letter....

"Sorry but our challenge is only allowed for two persons..."

I stayed still, my face blank and nodded.

Look how life is so unfair that it requires two people to finish a challenge of finishing food? I want to complain to someone who made the rule but I know the better way to deal with this; turn around and just suck it up coz life was never just.

I tried searching for other restaurants with similar challenge but all of them requires two freaking people!

Really? A challenge of eating something in a limited time requires at least two people? Can't they realize that it is unfavorable for them in the first place?

So my goal for the day is just to drain my remaining energy so I can just try and sleep peacefully tonight.

I walked in our familiar yet distant neighborhood. It never felt like I was on my way home. I feel like walking to the house of strangers who basically are supposed to be my family.

On my way, I looked at my worn out notes. A notebook with my suicidal motives and it looks like it is almost giving up on me. But I'm not.

Suhara Bay was someone that made me do all of these. Getting a notebook to write all the things I want to do before I get to leave and never return. Without her, I would've just sucked all remaining energy to accomplish my ultimate motive: be gone as if I never existed at all.

She was an inspiration and I don't think she'd be happy to hear this from other people but she really did made an impact in my lifeless life.

Her book, written and published, before she decided to commit suicide have grown on me and I wanted to follow her so bad. Reading the last pages of her book told me she was happy leaving her body. She was not the woman who regretted the life she lived.

It was ironic that she still decided to do it even after she found her reason to live. But maybe her point was not living happy but to at least leave happy.

And I wanted that for myself. To do something with my life and so I can bring something with me in the afterlife.

Because right now? My life is blank. It is dull and very meaningless.

My notebook has a lot of crossed out words which is a good thing. I'm almost done with what Sahara told me to finish.

....fly away from your body but before that, make sure your wings are with color so that the people...or at least someone, would see you gone.

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