Solo Parent is upholding the responsibilities and obligations to your child/children alone without a life partner.
Being a solo parent is sometimes a choice for others its what they want, while others it was un-intentional.
Fifteen days from now will be my three years of being a single parent for my child. As for my situation, since I know that I am already at my right age, with a stable work and longing for someone to be with me when I grow old; I intended to have a child out of wedlock. I am always left behind by the person/s that I fell in love with; so I see myself being alone. I see myself that I will be ok in the future since I have a child already that will guide me until I grow old.
I am 30 years old when I got pregnant and gave birth at the age of 31. During my 4th months of pregnancy I never heard about the father of my child I didn’t contact him also, I never asked her father to be with us. I was all alone during my delivery; there is no one that assist me overnight in the lying in Clinic where I gave birth to my child. I woke up in the morning find myself half of my face was being paralyze, it is called Bell Palsy. It is said that Bell Palsy is the effect of stress and having many thoughts.
During that night I could not sleep because my child was crying and I do not know how to take care of her because I am a new mother who just gave birth to a baby and no one is taking care of us because it is not allowed to have a lot of people inside the small clinic. I am not aware of Bell Palsy at first before, I thought it was due to my toothache. It is said to be that eating dark chocolate before delivery will help during labor, but it cause me toothache. My sister in-law told us that what happened to me was the same with her friend and its call Bell Palsy. When I searched about it was confirmed that it is.
I am still very lucky despite all the trials and hardship that I encountered, my face returned to normal after two months of self therapy. I conduct my own therapy, I massage my face every time I go to sleep, and every morning I practice moving my paralyzed face; I follow the steps that I saw in therapy session of people with this type of disability on how to massage the face of someone with bell palsy and for 2 months my face improve. I also make sure to consult the doctors and take all the medicines that are prescribed to me.
I am happy that I manage to survive and my face was able to go back to normal.
One thing that never encourages me being married was;
During my childhood, since I was born to a poor family surviving for the daily needs was very hard for my parents; they need to strive hard just to put food in our table. There are times that they are having a fight that result to my mother being beaten by father. When I saw my mother with a lot of bruise in her body I feel very sorry about her. Every time that scenario happened, I told myself that will never marry someday; I would never allow anyone to hurt me physically.
I am happy that despite the situation and the struggle of my parents together, all the fight that they had they are still together, growing old and loves each other very much. I envy them, because they survive all the problem and hardship that comes their way.
So for now I am enjoying myself being single mother, although I have lots of question regarding being a single mom and having a lot of thought of how to survive on my situation.
What keeps me to move forward was I had survived that challenge of life for me during that time, as a single parent then I can handle it more now.
I do make sure that I am ready to every challenge of life that may come on my way and until now I am still ready for more trials that are yet to come in my life, in our lives me and my daughter. 💪💪💪
I know I have nothing to be afraid being a single parent in the society, since I do believe that it is not a crime. It was our choice and we alone are the one who’s going to face the reality and consequence of life.
I love the idea of having as complete family but I am not ready to have one.