Making a comeback, sort off...

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Avatar for rebeysa85
9 months ago
Topics: Life, Story, Writing, Experiences, Health, ...

Hello hello my dearests!!

I´m glad to be here after so many weeks of absence. Lack of time is no excuse, we can always find a spot, a small window of time to take care of all of the important things we have going on in our lives, right? Sadly, other things get in the way, and not always we are able to handle them good enough or fast enough, but a sign of strength is not how fast you get back on your feet, is that you make your best effort and do it anyways despite having all the odds against you.

Since April I believe, I haven´t written a single post, long or short, nor here nor on Hive. My brother went back to Peru with his wife and we were left heartbroken because even if I have said harsh things about him and all the things we have gone through, he is my brother and we love him. The first week after his departure was the hardest, so we dug deep into our work and got lost in it: mom´s social media job with the foundation, my sister´s musical shores, and my administrative and management duties were the theme of all days, and for a while that was just fine.

The days kept going, we developed a new routine for our home and our jobs, one that allowed us to do all, to have all, and not miss anything. For me life was good, so good, but tiresome at the same time, I came home every day so tired, physically and emotionally drained, that I didn´t want to do anything, just sleep till the next day or maybe next month. And without even realizing it, my habit of writing here disappeared just like that, I stopped logging in, even to check if my account was still active or not or to answer or leave some comments on the articles of the people I came to know and love over here, nor to follow up with my sponsorships, not anything. 

So what happened?

Maybe depression, I´ve struggled with it for a long time; maybe it was just my illness, being so busy all the time with a body that on its best day is at 70% of energy, its only natural that I get tired easily and want to use my spare time just resting; maybe it was just that I was ashamed that I wasn't doing very well in my latest articles, or that the BCH price dropped so much that I thought that was it for me. But then I realized that even if I started to write because I needed money (and I still do) I found here a sort of release of all the things that make me happy or all the demons that haunt me, and I made the determination to make a comeback, create content, share stories, recipes, anecdotes, many plans that went to the pooper thanks to Covid.

After two years of immunity, my mom and sister got the dreaded virus, and it was bad, not hospital bad, but bad. Mom developed anemia and at the same time her cholesterol levels went sky-high even taking her medication, and my sister's blood pressure dropped to where the devil left his panties.

Three weeks of diet, tests, medication, one step forward two steps back, remembering when my dad was sick and we couldn´t do much and feeling guilty because of it, dealing with my siblings putting more pressure on me than ever before, the frustration of dealing with physicians that are in the business for the money and not because of a calling and a desire of helping and healing people. 

Finally, the fourth-week mom finally started to get better and I started to breathe, as was getting ready to relax and deal with my body collapsing because of all the stress, but no, I started to notice that my sister wasn't as fine as she wanted to convey. She lost more weight, the circles under her eyes darkened, as well as her skin, but cold to the touch. And my worries started to rise again, and I consulted with a doctor who told me that she might have Hipertoroidsm and that I should do a sonogram and some lab work. I did, and all the tests came back clean, but she wasn't getting better, so the same doctor said, let's check her blood sugar, and it was low, at 3 pm it was at 80 when it should have been between 100-140, so she said, check her basal insulin levels. Low again, my worries intensify, as we got our hands on a glucometer and started to check her glucose; on Sunday it went as high as 155, but then dropped to 75 in two hours. After that the highest has been 92, eating right, right hours, balanced, the whole nine yards.

I don't know what's going on, I'm scared, I don't know what to do, my mom looks out for me to solve this but I don´t know how, and as I was about to burst into tears, I remembered read.cash and decided to let it all out over here. 

My title? It is a comeback of some sort, I can't say it for sure, and I can't say that I'll be as active as I was before, I can't say anything for certain, but for now, I'm glad to be here, and a year after I started this journey, I'm glad to be back.



This is 100% Original Content.

The images are from Unsplash and are provided by this site. 



See you next time.

✨✨Blessings✨✨

@rebeysa85

August 17th, 2022.

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9 months ago
Topics: Life, Story, Writing, Experiences, Health, ...

Comments

Ya te salude y te di la bienvenida en el otro artículo jaja, y aún no he sacado el tiempo para ver las respuestas que me han hecho, sigo actualizandome con todos, leyendo y comentando los artículos de los demás, quiero llegar a leer 100 antes del domingo, una meta un poco loca para alguien que ha estado tan inactiva aquí, pero voy por buen camino con este llevo 30.

Cuando algo empieza mal, como que todo lo malo se empieza a juntar y nubla tu día, es realmente terrible cuando pasa eso, hace poco recibimos una mala llamada, ese mismo día la pc se nos dañó, se me rompió un plato, nos quedamos sin gasolina, casi me caigo por las escaleras, nos cortaron el internet, se fue la luz, estuvimos sin agua por muchas horas, fue un día realmente terrible jajaja

También estoy muy agotada física y emocionalmente, no solo por la rutina, supongo también se suma el hecho de comer a deshoras o poco, pero si el dinero no alcanza no se puee hacer mucho.

Mis buenos hábitos se acabaron, como el de escribir a diario, lo mismo que te pasó a ti, y todo viene siendo por lo mismo, las cosas negativas al alrededor.

Espero que todo vuelva a mejorar, ya estoy cansanda de tantos problemas, sin embargo, sigo trabajando fuerte cada día, esperando poder estar más cerca de mi meta

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9 months ago

Jajaja tranquila amiga, es natural, a veces tarda bastante ponerse al día, sobretodo cuando se está lidiando con tantas cosas.

No digas que tus buenos hábitos se acabaron, solo porque hayas flaqueado en una u otra cosa no quiere decir que hayas perdido todos los buenos hábitos que tenías no? Y si, a veces las circunstancias agobian a un punto en el que uno no parece ver en donde está y menos para donde va.

Habiendo estado en tu posición, encontré que dar un paso atrás por mi salud física y mental era lo mejor en ese momento; regresar a mi casa con mis padres me dio la estabilidad que necesitaba para poder enfocarme en mi. Ojo, con esto no te digo que regreses donde tus papás jaja, pero si que busques un sitio o un momento que te ayude a encontrar nuevamente tu centro, así al principio parezca un retroceso, a veces es necesario para poder enderezar el camino, porque en oportunidades pensamos que podemos con todo y no es así, no somos perfectos, no somos infalibles, y esta bien.

Llevalo suave, poco a poco, no te presiones tanto, todo volverá a su cauce amiga.

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9 months ago

Welcome back and I hope you felt better now that you was able to released some feelings that makes your heart heavy. Hopefully everything will be okay soon.

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9 months ago

Thank you dear! It comes and goes, we don´t kno w what we are dealing with yet so we are tiptoeing around everything basicaly. But we´ll get through it God willing.

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9 months ago