How do we define success?

I was reading and commenting on some articles until I came across the "Weekly writing prompts" by @PromptlyJonica so I dared to join.

First of all, thank you for accepting me into your community. I do not know everyone yet but I hope to do so sooner or later.

I asked myself some time ago what is success for me. Am I successful, or have I ever succeeded even once in my lifetime?

Success is such a complicated word. Some would measure it by the money in the bank, having a happy family, being a boss or having a dream career, having peace of mind and contentment, etc. For me, it depends on the dreamer.

I once talked to an old friend Cheche and I was surprised she thinks I am successful because I found a good man. She also said our other friend Norma is successful because she has her own traveling company, and Gerame our friend is successful because she has a stable career. So it really does vary.

I did experience successes though:

• I won different contests during my academic years

• I graduated with honors from elementary to college

• I had several recognitions in my previous companies

• I retained my sanity lol

• I gained a few great friends

But deep inside me, I know am not 100% successful yet.

Since being successful can be having a great career, money in the bank, financial freedom, and the ability to travel: I think I am a failure. Seriously, at 36? Yes. I do not have a stable job yet and have not achieved any of those mentioned.

And yes, I do envy my relatives and friends who are now married, have good-paying jobs, go into luxurious staycations, have nice cars, built their dream houses...And so the list goes on...Thinking about these make me sad.

But I believe a part of me is successful because I created excellent versions of myself.

As a good listener, people would talk to me about their lives, especially their careers. I instinctively would be able to determine their strengths and then give them advice. Here are some scenarios:

My boarding housemate Pau. She was hired in a private plane company as a receptionist but wanted to become a stewardess.

She told me,  "I don't think I can make it. It is so difficult".

"Is that what you really love to do? I don't see any reasons why you won't push your dreams". I advised.

She listened to me and through the encouragement of her friends and family, she is now a full-pledged stewardess. I remember the day she got her new car, they all went to Tagaytay with our fellow housemates. I was at work at that time so I was not able to join. She also now lives in a condo.

Another one is Debbie. We used to work in the same BPO company. I admire her courage because she immediately resigns whenever a company does not meet her expectations. 

She said, " I always give my best whenever I work, so why would I stay in a bad company?"."But where do I need to apply so I can provide my needs and help my family?".

I answered, " The money is actually on Sales". "You can do it because you're witty, smart, and have excellent communication skills", I added.

True enough, she did great and she is now an Account Manager of a Sales Team. I am proudly envious of her.

My teammate Jane, I gave her a piece of advice about her love life.

" He does not have a lot of money, Ate", she told me as she was dating a foreigner.

"As long as he has a good character, money is not a problem". "Give it a chance and you'll see how it goes, Jane".

She was a shy woman and was bullied at work for being naive and "Probinsyana". But some got jealous when her American boyfriend came to meet her. She is now happily married and living in New York with her family.

I smile on my face every time I reminisce about the difference I made in some people's lives, even though they are doing better than I do.

Am I a failure? Partly, I am. And I'm sad and bitter about it. I am a college graduate, a dean's lister, but what am I now? A full-time mom who cleans the CR, picks other people's mess aside from my family's, washes the dishes, does the laundry. (My aunt Joy would ask if I already have a job and my Aunt Jinjin would send me links about jobs abroad. Because they know what I am intellectually capable of.)

But, is this the end? NO, there is always hope as long as I am alive. I can definitely go back to work when the kids are big enough. And if I'll be able to raise two responsible individuals, then, I will be a happy and successful mother.

Success is like beauty, it is in the eye of the beholder lol. Also, when you can pursue your passion and be of service to others in any way, then you are successful.

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