@av 7 July 2022 more from that month

Wake up! I went deeper and deeper into the woods of despair. I knew not how to go back. I looked for the sun but I saw darkness. I searched for a beam of light but can't see. I slumped down and curled into a ball. Like a millipede being attacked. I played with such things when I was a child but I always hated how those creatures smelled. Until now, I don't like them. But I mimicked their action even when no one's kicking me. Did I smell awful perhaps being curled like that? The tricky hormones were playing with me I knew. And I had to get angry with myself before coming to my senses. You're not alone was the voice I heard within me. This is just so small. It continued. I felt ashamed but what does it know? That voice that I heard. I picked myself up. I had to catch up with the world. I needed to patch my holes up lest I get seen by the world outside. I woke up to repair what I have damaged. Being an adult isn't easy at all. When you go down, you have to keep it a secret sometimes not to bother the young ones. We are models to them. We can't afford to lose to despair. Had I not realized my tendency, I would've been beaten down by my own weakness. I have to be thankful I woke up.