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Suddenly I fell in love with poetry. How, why, when I fell in love with him is all unknown to me yet !! I have known him since I started writing on Facebook.
I am Neela Chowdhury! I am a big fan of Humayun Ahmed !! I am also a big fan of Zaheer Raihan, Bibhutibhushan, Sherlock !! It can be said that I consider myself as half sister of Humayun Ahmed !! Only.
I write a lot on Facebook. I have never included myself in the list of writers. I still don't. However, there are many who are huge fans of my writing !! Many people have a reputation in the inbox. People's minds are at least a little bit of food !!
I was writing a series of stories. One evening in the middle of writing a story, I posted a post about some of the topics in the story. Then Kavya commented on the post that she likes my writing very much. There is not always time. And many people do inbox. I don't reply to them, I don't even send a message to the scene. Honestly, I don't chat with anyone except for a very special need! Maybe for some reason I accepted the friend request of the poem.
Poetry knocked me that night. He asked various questions. His first question was how much do I know Sherlock Holmes !! He asked me various questions and I kept answering him. He used to reply to someone's message from a distant scene. He replied to the message. I am a little talkative. And the poetry is also a bit like mine. I was enjoying talking to him very well.
I have some bad temper. I never text anyone on my own. I feel like I am not feeling well. If I don't get a reply right away, I feel very self-respect. So I can't text anyone despite asking. I'm a kind of selfish. Many say I'm selfish. I do not agree. Because I am true.
I talked to Kavya for several days after that day. As long as I was free all day long, I would give OK time. I was very free because I had no love. There was no problem in talking to Kavya.
Kavya always hides herself. She uses Facebook under a pseudonym. Although I know her name is Kavya. But I have never seen her. I don't even know what she looks like. At first I talked for a long time. I work digging the soil ". I laughed a lot in my mind that day. I replied" OK !! Very good ". He laughed and said" Really good ?? "I said" Hmm "
I talked to him a lot. I used to talk to him all day long. Sometimes I wanted to give him a message. But I can't do that. I didn't understand whether it was love or not. He gave me his number by himself. He also asked for my number. I also gave it to him without any question. I became restless after talking to him in voice. So much in his voice. I couldn't imagine mixing sweetness. How can a boy's voice be so beautiful.
One day he sat down and asked for my picture. I asked "Why !! I don't give anyone a pick." He said, "I want to see him because he writes so beautifully. Nothing more. The rest is your wish. If I had given him a pic on Facebook, I wouldn't have asked for it anymore." I got a little courage to ask him. So I sat down. But he did not give. I got in a lot of trouble. For the first time I asked a boy for a picture and he ignored me like this !!
After a while I found out that the boy had finished engineering. He said it himself! I found out whatever it was. He was four years older than me. But there was still a regret. I haven't seen him yet. I really want to see him. But And I can't even ask for pictures. I don't have those habits at all. Once I asked for it but it didn't work.
One day a familiar friend proposed to me. The name suffix. I thought maybe he was joking. So I also joked for a while. The next day I saw that he was very serious. Then I said I like poetry very much. Then he said
--Give a picture of the one you like.
- I mean ??? Give it. I see that our beloved writer loves a beautiful man. If I see a picture, I will not take it. Does he look smarter than me?
- I don't know. And it will be beautiful or handsome.
- Damn, I don't have the benefit of saying this, I'm not a poet. And I don't know again?
- I've never seen him.
- It's weird !!! What about your poetry.
--Ohh this is why I say I do not like it. Engineering, he has money. Love without seeing. Now belly, bald whatever you want, as long as you have money. You girls are like that.
--Wonder !! What is there to say all this? At first I didn't know anything about him.
- Now you say all this !!
- Look, misunderstand me. And I did not say that I love him. I like him very much.
- He is the same. Love him or his money. Go and see if there is no lack of his girlfriend. They are like that. He bought a girlfriend with money.
I was in a very bad mood. I gave him a block at once. I wanted to go and slap him a few times.
The words of the suffix made me think a lot, maybe he really told the truth. I probably didn't love poetry for money. But anyone who heard it might think that I love him for money or like him so much. I don't know what he looks like. I like to spend time very much. His words make me think a lot. I don't know why it happens. I couldn't understand whether it was a momentary love, fascination or true love. I write a lot about love. However, it is imaginary. I also cooperate with some friends about love. But when it came to my own case, I was shocked. I could not understand anything.
Kavya does a lot of nonsense with everyone. But I can't stand her nonsense with girls at all. I go and beat her with all my heart. Why do I have to do so much nonsense with girls, I have to talk? It's very hot. I go to his inbox. I check if he has given any message. I read the old messages. His posts also come first in the news feed. First of all. I have a lot of places in my mind.
Lately I talk a lot with Kavya. He listens to me songs, I also listen to him songs. His voice is so enchanting !! I get fascinated every time. Several of his voices are saved on my phone. All the voice recording phones to talk to him. It has been saved. I always listen to it. The more I listen to it, the better. I like the crazy call on his face very much. One day he gave me a voice for about 20 seconds saying he was crazy. I saved it. I listen to it several times a day The sound of laughter, his crazy call caused a chinchilla pain in my chest.
The friendship with Kavya has developed very intensely. I think a lot about him. I don't know if I exist anywhere far beyond the limits of his imagination !! He likes my singing voice very much.
One evening he gave me a message.
- What do you do?
- I made breakfast. Food?
- What did you make?
- Areh I made a pudding. Hobby. Food?
--What ?? Can you make pudding?
- Yes, I can !!
- What else can you do?
- I can do a lot of things. Cakes, pizzas, puddings, french fries, chicken fries, fruit cakes, chicken biryani, and many more.
- I don't know what other qualities are in you. I am getting fascinated day by day.
Then I took a picture of the pudding
--Wow it looks so delicious. When will you feed me?
--When the opportunity arises !!
The more I want to forget the poem, the more I want to push it away from myself, the closer I get. I fall in love with him more. I couldn't understand what to do. I can't block him for no reason. "I like you so much, I can't move away from myself. I can't think of anything but you. You think so much of me so I blocked you" - is it possible to say that at all? Then he knew that I like him. He may think the same thing. Why is my weakness towards him without seeing him. Maybe he will also think about his money ....... Nah, I can't think about any of these things. He sometimes calls me Nilu. She caresses me so much that no one calls me.
As time goes by, I am becoming very weak towards poetry. He thinks too much of me. One day I left his message in Ignore. The next day, when I suddenly went to his inbox, I saw a pile of messages coming and submitted. Nanan naughty !!
Sometimes he gets very upset. He gets upset for no reason. Then I feel really bad. I can't make my mind better. I don't know how to make someone's mind better. It hurts a lot without knowing it. But I failed.
Every day after the prayers I pray in the munajat "Allah: If poetry is not created for me, please don't attract me to it. I don't want to just get in trouble. My feelings towards him make me cringe. So you know everything, Allah. Don't make me attracted to him anymore ". I want to forget the poem from my heart. Whenever I want to forget him, he appears in the inbox with a flurry of words. I can't forget him at all. He doesn't make a single point about me and treats me normally like ten girls. He talks. Maybe he talks to me a little more. That's the difference.
It's been five months since I've met Kavya. I don't even know why I like her so much. The real reason is unknown. Sometimes I want to say "Kavya, I love you so much". Sometimes I go to Messenger and type. But again I keep the word in the backspace. Sometimes I want to talk to him in the middle of the night on the phone. Remains in the backspace as unspoken words.
I may have fallen in love with his words. But he did not tell me anything that made me so desperate for him. Why did I fall in love with him so much ?? God knows what is in his words.
Lately, I have been arguing with Kavya for no reason. It hurts a lot. I still do it. I don't want my feelings to get worse. I have to make this decision knowing that I can't float in the current. No more. The diameter starts to be avoided in this way. I don't have the habit of giving messages at all. Although I used to give messages to Kavya sometimes for no reason. But now I don't give it anymore.
I don't know how much I have forgotten the poem. It's been a long time since any message came from him. No message from me either. And I don't come online as much as before. I post stories, write, scroll the news feed or read stories !! I don't go to chat. Why don't you want to talk to someone !!!
I swear the days are over !! Sometimes I just miss him too much !! Maya may be like that. Once you fall into the net, it becomes difficult for Budd to come up.