You Can Do This, Self

After all the things happened in my life, I have never experienced this much pressure inside of me. From school, to online stuffs, to events happening, I always overthink, and lose track of my life...

Always in problems that could be fixed, but it kept coming to me, and I lose, what I could do first...

I can't talk to my parents because I'm always afraid of telling them what I always think, and I don't want them to worry... This 2022, all things, bad things, happened.

But I only have 1 thing to remember my older sister and my friends said, "Kaya mo to, self."

Despite all the challenges in life, it's always me who could fix things that I have to fix. Every problems can be fixed.

But even though I didn't told my parents what I was doing, they made me remind myself and realise, all things are possible.

God gave me signs that I should calm myself down and think about good things.

Pressure, is what I have. Can't even talk about it in person, and when everyone asked, "Are you okay?", I replied with "yes...", even though I'm having a bad time.

All my works are affected, including my writing in this platform, or even my interest in playing with my friends online, or even talk to someone else I don't know, and I don't want to stop, but my interest is just, you know, lost...

The events, stressed me out. Thinking what will happen next. There's even a family conflict happened between two clans I'm part with.

The courage I have always and self confidence, are now losing. Didn't even know what makes me lose it. I lost hope. I lost... my own self.

Overthinking, stress, pressure

But even so, I always think, I have everything I need to do this, even courage to write or talk.

I will not stop, despite my lost.

I know, I believe, I can do this.

I just need someone. And they're already around me.

Friends, family, and God. They're all here to help. I just didn't asked them and told them about my problems.

In fact, I did an impromptu speech in English in front of class, even overcoming my fears in stage. I even got into the Honors Roll in class. So, I can really do this.

And even I lost interest, I know what I have to do. No one rushed me to do this, it is me who rushed myself.

And always, I will say to myself... You can do this self.

And I'm not alone in this game called life. I have me and my family, friends and God.

Sorry if I am inactive lately. I'm so busy irl and can't keep up. I'm bad at promising, but I'll try to keep up. Despite my lost of interest. I will keep on writing, even if it takes alot of time to publish.

-Stanley

Name: You Can Do This, Self
Blog No.: 56
Category: My Diaries
Date of Upload: 07/16/2022