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When The Shame Outweighs The Pain

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Written by   47
2 months ago

Recently, I wrote about my childhood adventure which resulted in a disaster because of my stubbornness. If you haven't read it yet, you can find it here.

And while writing that, I remembered a phrase that my middle school friends used to say back then. If translated to English, it'll roughly sound like this:

"It doesn't hurt much, but the shame though!"

I guess that sounds pretty weird, eh? Let me explain the phrase in the best way I possibly can.

We use this phrase whenever a minor accident happens where the people in the discussion are not really hurt badly or might not be hurt at all, and the shame that follows the accident is much greater than the physical pain they feel.

But that's not the only thing that I wanted to talk about today. I also want to talk about how we can always gain something from shameful little incidents. The first story I'm going to share is from my friend back from middle school.

One day in 8th grade, we were playing football (soccer) on the school court during PE class. The teacher always makes the boys and girls play in turn. Like 10 minutes for the boys, switch to 10 minutes for the girls, switch back to the boys, and so on.

During the boys' turn, one of my classmate that has a crush on a girl tried to do a skill move to impress her. Unfortunately for him, he failed the move and instead tripped on his own foot. He fell to the ground but he was not hurt. The court become dead silent and everyone on the court looked at him for a few seconds, before finally bursting into laughter.

This includes the other players, the teacher, and even the girl he's crushing on. After he gets up, we can see that his face is red. Not because of blood or anything, but he's blushing in shame. And so, I and the boys said our trademark phrase at that time.

"It doesn't hurt much, but the shame though!"

He just laughed it off and we continue playing after that. Nowadays, whenever we meet him or have a group video call, we'll always talk about that moment. Not to mock him of his failed skill move, but to tease him. Because not long after that incident, he gathered his courage and confessed to the girl he has a crush on back then, and they're still together until now.

That story is just proof that even if we do end up ashamed because of an accident or a foolish thing we did, there might be something good that came out of it. In his case, he might get an additional push to gather up his courage and confesses.

In this next part, I'll tell you another incident that can be said to have a positive long-term effect, even if I am ashamed in the short term because of it. This time, the story is from my own experience and point of view.

It was during the summer break in high school. Me and a few friends decided to go on a trip to visit one of our friends living in another city. On the third day of the trip, we wake up early at about 3 AM as we were planning to go on a road trip around the province. We prepared our necessities for the day and ate our breakfast in the car. The first place we visited was the mountains as we wanted to see the sunrise in the best way possible. Yet to our misfortune, the sky was too clouded on the top, and we can't really see the sunrise that day.

The start of the province trip was not good by any means. But we are just starting the day, and so we move on to our next location. It was a national park of some sort. There were tourist spots like rivers, caves, waterfalls, springs, and forests. Saying that the place was beautiful is an understatement, it was amazing.

We paid the entrance fee for the place, and when we entered, we were offered several packages for touring the place. We chose the one that offers the whole experience including a guide for the tour. The guide suggested that we start with the river/spring/waterfall spot and so he led us there. We walked a few kilometers to the spot and then started swimming as soon we can see the river. The current wasn't strong at all and we can just peacefully swim along the river. One of my friends can't swim but there were a few floats to accommodate her.

As we were just swimming in the direction of the waterfall, we see a small cliff on the side surrounded by rocks. It was a short one, maybe around 6 or 7 meters tall. Somehow, one of my friends got the idea to jump off the cliff and he asked if any of us were willing to try it as well. To my surprise, almost all of them agreed to it. Not willing to get left behind and teased for it, I agreed to the dumb idea, knowing well that I'm not a fan of heights. And so we climbed to the top of the cliff. Others were climbing the cliff as fast as monkeys would climb a tree, whereas I would slowly crawl up to the top.

At the top of the cliff, they were deciding the order of jumping off. I have never tried anything as dangerous as this and so I think that it'd be best for me to go last, in case I lost my nerve and decided to go back down without jumping. And so they jumped off one by one, each with a beautiful front and backflip that'd get rated highly if there were judges. Then my turn came, I was still undecided whether to jump off or just crawl my way back down, but they were cheering for me.

*whoosh*

I gathered the last speck of courage I had in me and jumped down the cliff and tried to throw my head down in an attempt to make a flip just like they did. I tried my best to imitate their moves but sadly, my unathletic and untrained body said no.

*splash*

I landed face-first into the water, without even performing a single flip. They quickly rushed to me, worried that I got concussed because the sound effect when my face hit the water was not a good one to hear. But as soon as I get my head out of the water, I can hear laughter from all around me. Turns out my face was bright red from the impact with the water. It was as if I got slapped in the whole face by it, and it really feels that way to me.

My face feels numb for a few minutes after that, but the shame of my failed jump shadowed all over the pain I felt. It was quite embarrassing, especially the fact that there were a few girls there as well. Ah, how I wished that I can time my flip better and do as well as the others!

But looking at the bright side, that moment is one of the things that make the trip so memorable. Especially now that some of us have graduated from college and become so busy with our daily lives, it became one of our inside jokes and a topic to start a conversation, more so about our future plans to have another road trip together. So all in all, I guess I'm glad I find the courage to jump off the cliff, failed, and got out of it unscathed.

I wasn't really a great admirer of nature back then, so I only have a few photos of the views. Most of them are just pictures of me and my friend, so I'll just share the ones without our faces in it hehe.

So, those are a couple of experiences from me and my friend about accidents in which the shame outweighs the pain. And even though they sound like a bad experience, I think that there were a lot of things that we learned and gained from them.

What about you? Do you have any moments like that in your life? Feel free to share them in the comments section. And if you decide to make a new article about this topic, kindly tag me so I can read your experience as well!

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Author's Note

All pictures in this article were taken by me.

If you find this article enjoyable, kindly check out my other works here:

A Cruel Twist Of Fate

The Boy Who Wants To Dream

Is Cryptocurrency The Right Step Towards Real Democracy?

Your Everyday Heroes

You can also find me on noise!

~Thank you so much for all the support so far. Until next time, peace out!~

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Written by   47
2 months ago
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Comments

These are excellent stories you tell. I smile as I imagine your laughter as you recall those episodes. The pictures are great too.

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2 months ago

Thank you for visiting :D

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2 months ago

Those experiences will surely mark someone for life :D I don't know what lesson I can derive from my experience which happens a lot. While alighting a jeepney, I am not aware sometimes of what's on the ceiling of the jeep. I would bump my head on lights or hand rail or something. The sound of those hitting my head would make anyone be concerned. It does really hurt to the point of making me tear up but I had to keep a poker face to save face. Only when the jeepney is out of sight will I howl in pain lol!

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2 months ago

Hahaha I get that feeling! When I toured on a mountain with my friends on a jeep I would stand up inside it and when the terrain gets rocky I'd bump my head lots of times lol

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2 months ago

If you hit face first, you are very lucky you were not seriously hurt. However, we have all done similar things in our past;)

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2 months ago

I guess so hehe :D

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2 months ago

ROFL I can literally imagine the embarrassment your friend felt after failing to do the trick LMAO

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2 months ago

Hahah it's really an embarassing moment

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2 months ago

OMG, I'm sorry for i laugh while reading your embarrassing moment, I'm not a bully person but my imagination found it funny ✌️😂. I imagine how red your face was, but why you have to do that?😂 I'm really sorry dear,but i found it funny. But i think your a good buddy. Your not a kj (kill joy) so i bet every friends you have loved to hang out with you 👍👌.

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2 months ago

No please it's okay. I find myself laughing when looking back to that moment nowadays too 😂. I guess I don't want to be left behind and tried to follow their jump but alas my body just can't spin fast enough 😂. Thanks for the very kind words :))

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2 months ago

Aw that's not funny for people laughing like that :(

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2 months ago

If it's directed to me I don't really mind hahaha, because when I look back now it's really stupid for me to try and do a flip with my untrained body 😂

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2 months ago

Hehe, buddy, I can feel your embarrassing moment in front of girls. It happened to me once . 😂 no matter It has become a fun part of your memory.

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2 months ago

Yeah true, when we do stupid things with the boys only it doesn't really shame us much 😂

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2 months ago

I can never understand people laughing over others tripping and falling down on things... my first instinct would be "oh no, are you hurt? are you okay??"... this generation is screwed up 🤣🤣

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2 months ago

We really are not right in the head sometimes 🤣

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2 months ago

I do have lots of it before. As for me, its really painful not just to imagine. Emotional pain is much hurtful than physical. But its all said and done. :)

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2 months ago

Yeahh I'm just a bit ashamed but I don't really mind them laughing at that moment, because if they did the same fail, I'd laugh as well :D, thanks for visiting!

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2 months ago

That's good to hear tho. You're welcome my friend.

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2 months ago

It was a hilarious journey. We made throughout your content as if we were having those moments. Be careful dear.

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2 months ago