Gloomy as the weather.
Date: April 10, 2022
Author: Sequoia
As the rain pours on our roof, my tears are racing to fall on my cheeks as well. No matter how much I tried to hold it and keep everything inside of me, it was already my heart that can't take it anymore.
I wanted to scream and curse everyone I see because of this uncontainable emotion. So tempted to cut my life to end the anguish that I am suffering ever since the day I became aware of what the real world really is and how it works.
Been rejected and taken for granted.
Been used and abused.
Been tortured multiple times.
Betrayed by my own so-called pals.
No matter how much I tried, I can't still figure out what have I done in my past life to deserve all these unpleasant things I am encountering right now.
If this is the universe's way of preparing me for greater things, then I guess I am already prepared for it.
I've endured and suffered a lot.
Lost so much blood, sweat, and tears.
I even lost myself along the way.
Maybe these are my consequences or karma from being such a hard-headed kid back then. LOL
Or maybe I am just overreacting and emotional.
Mood swings? Hormones?
Or should I blame the gloomy weather for having a gloomy heart?
I don't really know where to start or stop. Not even sure if I am already running or just lost in my own abstract world.
The only thing I am sure of is that I needed help. Not from my co-human being but from my Creator.
There are issues that no one can resolve but only Him. I have to run and plug into my source of life once again.
I've been away for too long already and my energy is already on its last bit.
I gotta go home to my Father's house and take back the things that this world has stolen from me.
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Author's Viewpoint
I will turn 22 tomorrow but I guess I am gonna celebrate it with a sad heart. Sorry for this negativity fam. Just needed to express what I truly feel inside and unbottle the emotions before they totally explode and affect others as well. I shouldn't be sharing something like this here but I don't know where I can share it aside from this platform. This is where I find my comfort the best. This is where I feel at home.
Thanks for reading . Stay safe and always make sure to enjoy every bit of your life. Ciao!
P.S: Please leave some encouraging lines. I badly need it right now. Will appreciate it so much if ever.
You'll get through it sis. Kapitvlang. Ganunctalaga ang buhay eh. Isipin mo na lang talaga matinding challenge sayo to. If you quit, talo ka.