It Has Been A Long Five Days!

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2 years ago

Nicotine

This day and age we have all kinds of ways that one could get their lovely dose of Nicotine. You can buy a simple E Cig, pack of Cig's, roll your own, snort it, chew it, suck on it, patch on the arm or even in gum.

They say that Nicotine addiction is worse than heroin addictions. I have know plenty of people that have died from heroin over doses so I won't even begin to compare the two beyond addiction and accessibility.

Nicotine in the United States is every where. The movies used to have movie stars on tv smoking constantly. I remember when I started smoking, I hated the smell, the taste but I liked the way it made me feel.

I was maybe 5 years old the first time I had a cigarette. I was in the woods by my now deceased uncles house with my cousins that are now grown with children. I remember my older cousin talked some teenagers into bringing her a pack of Marlboro Red shorts.

We each got our own Cigarette, I puked but wow. That moment on I spent the 5 to 6 years sneaking around and smoking socially. I was between the ages of 10 - 12 years old when I started smoking daily. I was around 13 when I mother learned I had been paying $5 for a pack of cigarettes that costed $2

This wasn't the best decision, but it wasn't abnormal back than. My mother begin giving me cigarettes. I smoke until I was 14 and I quit for about 8 months after having pneumonia and being diagnosed with asthma.

That was a short lived victory. I would go on to quit another 1 times over the next 20 years of my life, with the exception of some served time I did. I was still able to get nicotine. I quit smoking for 9 months a few years back. The next thing I knew. I bought a pack of cigarettes and started smoking again.

Sunday March 13, 2022 11:00 p.m.

That was the last time I smoke a cigarette. I decided that I don't want my children to continue to see me literally killing myself one cigarette at a time. I didn't want to die gasping for air like a fish out of water. I know I still could, but 5 days ago when I decided I was done smoking forever, I drastically lowered those odds.

I would say that Monday was the worse day of all. I went through so many 2mg Nicotine lozenges to keeps myself calm. The hardest part of quitting smoking is that whole taste that I hate. The way you feel after one draw off of a cigarette, the subtle head change.

The way your body craves all of those nasty toxins that it has become so accustomed to over the last 20 years... I never really thought about it but, a lot of us have been groomed to become smokers.

I felt like I would try the whole venting about cigarettes for a moment. I was actually inspired to make the commitment to quit and stay quit again by a similar blog post that I had read on the 12th I think.

The hardest part has been not doubting myself, staying positive and knowing that I can live without another cigarette ever again in my whole life time. Once I get over the mental part, the whole habit of smoking. When I am bored, smoke. When I eat, smoke. When I wake up or before bed, smoke. When I drink liquor, smoke more. When I write, smoke more. When I program, smoke even more. When I game, smoke even more. When I drive, smoke more.

I think you get the point that smoking has been a major part of my life for the last 20 years. I would probably have a totally different life if I hadn't started smoking 20 years ago. I am not going to imply it would have been a better life, but smokers vs non smokers tend to go two different directions in life.

Anyways, if you are a smoker and you are trying to quit, YOU GOT THIS, YOU CAN DO IT. I CAN DO IT, WE ALL CAN DO IT, STAY STRONG, GOD BLESS YOU!

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