I found my Hero in....

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Avatar for Ruffa
Written by
2 years ago

Problems after problems, you solve the first one but then another one occur again. It's like, the heaven has a grudge on you that's why they continuously throwing those problems at you, it won't just go away. I know, you tried your best. I know, you give your all, but to some it's still not enough. You want to give up, I felt it. You want all your problems gone I know, if I can - I'll help you without asking for anything. Aside from the loneliness that you have right now, I know you're already at your peak. You want to end it all. You're about to give up specially now you're trying your best, fighting alone.

Those people who you thought will help you in time of needs was nowhere to be found. They are gone, they already turned their back at you. They already judge you without even asking what really happened. Why is it so easy for them to judge people like they know the real story behind it? They are cursing you, throwing different accusations like you're not in pain. Branding you different names like you didn't do a good deeds in your life, ever. Even if they already witnessed and experience your kindness.

They only believe on what they saw outside but they didn't even bother asking what really happened. They are afraid now to even look at you. And their gaze, their gaze that cut like knife in your heart, those doubt was written in their faces and it was already marked on your head. They taunt you and set aside your feeling like you are the biggest criminal in the world. They already forgot the times that you lend them your hands when they are the one who's asking for help. Your good deeds was covered by that one mistakes that you did.

You feel like your world was shattered into pieces and now you don't know how to put those pieces back. But you know that there's still a hope but you don't know where to start and how. You are currently missing, you can't find yourself anymore. You lost you! You find yourself in the darkness. You don't want to be save anymore. The hope? It was all gone. You let your demons got the best of you. They easily take over because you don't have the will to fight back! You let them decide for yourself. You let the darkness succumb the little sanity that you have.

I know, you tried you best and hardest to fight back, but luck was not on your side, I saw it. And the hole in your heart that was just a bit smaller become bigger and bigger and bigger to the point that a piece of cloth was not enough to cover it. It can't be save anymore but there's still a way. For sure there's still a way. But why? Why you didn't fight back? Are you gonna let those demons in your head permanently destroy you? Is that really your end? You know a small step, just one small step can change everything!

I should be happy, you're smiling now. But what have you done to yourself? You said you found yourself a hero. Someone who will save you from your misery and loneliness. Someone who will cure the doubt in yourself. Someone who will heal the big hole in your heart. And someone who will help you pick those scattered pieces of your broken world? But what have you done? You're happy, you're in euphoria, you're smiling but why you look like who haven't sleep for a week? You're eyes is red and you smell different. The thing in your hand, you're smoking it, you're still not yourself.

You doing good, you're dancing with your own music but I can see the opposite in your looks. You look wasted, those lively eyes that you had before was gone, it was replace by you're glare, pokerface. It's like you're about to do something bad. You're smiling but it was a dirty smile with some malice. You're alive but you're still dead inside. What have you done! Why you choose that path? Why you didn't avoid it while still early? Why you have to take the wrong way? I told you, you still have hope. You can still rise from that dump you are kn. You're not hopeless yet. Now look at you having a hard time in breathing.

You become addicted in it instead of finding yourself. You forgot your purpose and the drugs consume you. I thought it was your hero? But why it was killing you instead? I thought it will save you? But why you're still in pain and having a hard time in breathing. You're gasping too much like you're about to die. Where is the saving in there? It should be saving you from your misery but instead, it destroyed you. It helps you forget your pain but in the end, permanently, you will never face any more problem because you're already gone. You died because of your Heroine.


By the way, I get the idea of my topic today because of this song - Heroine of Silverstein. This is one of my favorite song gusyuuu, I just love it. I can listen to it for a thousand times and I will never get tired if it. I don't know if my article is making any sense or connected to this song but, I think the thought is similar. I'm not sure pala πŸ˜–.

Drugs is not the cure to all of our problems. It will get us a little high like you're the happiest man alive in the earth. But it will also destroy your system. The happiness you feel is just for a short time. And you will just notice that you're not yourself anymore. You'll get more addicted into it, and the bad effect? You.can.die.


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July 26, 2021

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2 years ago

Comments

I know some people personally who were drug addicts before and now, I know that they already changed.

And hearing from them, talagang walang naidudulot na maganda yang drugs na yan. True may panandaliang feels na wala silang nararamdaman and sobrang high talaga pero after non wala e, sumisira ng buhay, sumisira ng pamilya. Buti nalang talaga nagbago sila.

Ang nakakalungkot pa, ang daming kabataan ngayon yung naeengganyo magtry ng ganyan. Grabe lang talaga. Ang hirap solusyunan nito pero sana makahanap sila ng tamang paggabay mula sa mga taong nakapaligid sakanila.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Mahirap na kasi masolusyunan talaga ang issue na yan. Pero ako sa akin lang, walang bibili kung walang magbebenta. Hanggang meron gumagawa ng ipinagbabawal na yan, hindi mawawala ang mga bibili. Kaso totoo yung mahirap makalaban ang mga nasa tuktok ng gumagawa ng ipinagbabawal na yan. πŸ˜”

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2 years ago

sabagay din. hindi maialis kasi matataas na tao e, mga untouchable ba. they are ruining lives at parang wala lang yun sa kanila. hmm

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2 years ago

Nakakasad noh? Yung gusto mong puksain yung mga gumagawa kaso parang makikipagharap ka na kay kamatayan kapag ganun.

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2 years ago

Prayer na nga lang. Kasi kahit makisali tayo sa gulo, wala e. Kailan kaya sila mauubos. Hays

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2 years ago

I kept on replying but I always forgot to greet you.. belated happy birthday immaryandmerry πŸ₯³

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2 years ago

hahaha. yay, my birthday is extended. LOL. Thank you! :)

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2 years ago

Our birthday is for the whole month πŸ˜‰

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2 years ago

True! Hahaha. I'm still not publishing my brithday article. Lol

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2 years ago

Ramdam na ramdam ko yung bawat salita na mga nasambit mo. Una akala ko ako pinaparinggang mo sa problems after problems after problems. Hahahaha.

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2 years ago

Hahahahaha,. Naaddict sya sa drugs huehue.

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2 years ago

Hahaha. Ayun na nga. Patungkol pala sa droga. Addicting naman din kasi talaga. Nasa sa tao na din kung magpapadala siya doon.

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2 years ago

That's it. The moment when they just believe what they saw and don't even ask what really happened. This is what I hate most. My grandparents are like this before. They just decide without asking me first or even ask what's the reason why i did that certain thing.

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2 years ago

I like that My heroine by Silverstein, nakaka high din kahit di ka mag drugs haha. People should overcome emotional distress to avoid being drug dependent.

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2 years ago

I am really, a hundred percent against abusive use of drugs. Especially if it could harm innocent people. Yung mga lalaki at babeng nagda-drugs, buti ba kung buhay lang nila ang nasisira, nandadamay pa sila ng biktima by doing horrible crimes under influence. It makes my blood boil.

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2 years ago

Ay yan na nga, isa pa yan. Isa pa nga pala yan sa epekto ng drugs tsk. Ang daming biktima n ang salarin ay under the influence ng drugs. Nakakapang, minsan bata pa ang nabibiktima ee 😀😀

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2 years ago

true. Sa totoo lang. Di naman nagkulang ang givernment, media and all possible info sources para mag warn, MASAMA YAN. So I can't really find some sympathy sa mga nagpakalulong (at nagsisisi na daw kuno) kasi choice nila yon eh. Unless siguro may pumilit sa kanila.

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2 years ago

that drug that you thought was a solution to the endless cycle or flow of problems.. is also an invitation of even more massive problems. Kinda reminds mo of Leo's old movies also : Basketball Diaries ata. It destroys vital relationships. . .

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2 years ago

Yan na, oo nga grabi wala na kasing makapitan ung iba kaya para nga naman makalimot, mag ganyan nalang ☹️

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2 years ago

Beautifully written, taking drugs isn't the way, it only surpresses for a while before the aftermath kicks in.

pain and agony flows everywhere, you can't begin to ask how? But for every situation there is always a solution.

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2 years ago

Oh wow Thanks ☺️. ..

True, very true it will inly good at first because you'll feel overwhelming happiness but after that ☹️. Off course there's a solution, but some can't really find those solution because their mind was already clouded with so much pain ☹️

$ 0.05
2 years ago

Yes that is true, it doesn't solve anything...you're welcome

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2 years ago

while reading this, I thought of that lady who lost her boyfriend to another lady because of tradition. She was there during the wedding and she was crying during the ceremony. She lost her mind after that and became very ill... I don't know why I thought of that lady though... maybe because of how you said about the world shattered into pieces.

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2 years ago

Oh gosh tradition. Siguro pinagkasundo ganon? Grabi ano, sobra siguro sya nag isip kaya naapektuhan ng todo isip nya ☹️

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Yes kawawa.. family ata nag decide na iba pakakasalan ni Lalake..kawaw talaga sya

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2 years ago

Drugs are not the best way for anyone. Once you get into that world you can't get out so easily. And then far from alleviating the problems it gives you many more.

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2 years ago

Truee, it was addicting that the only way out is tru admitting into a rehab πŸ˜’

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2 years ago

Ang lalim naman. Ang hirap talaga pag ikaw lang yung palaging andyan para sa kanila. Pero pag ikaw naman yung nangailangan, di mo sila mahagilap :)

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2 years ago

Di mo baga masisid? Bigyan kita life vest πŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

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2 years ago

I also have that friends who are nowhere to be found whenever I need them. And when I found them, they refuse to help. But I just let them for I knew there will be time they need help too and no one will. It's not a revenge but a lesson for them

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2 years ago

Ganyan yan sila no, oag nangailangan ang galing magpaawa. Tapos ikaw namang si mabait bigay agad, tapos pag ikaw na nangailangan, aguyy tatalikudan ka agad. Tsk.

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2 years ago

Kaya nga eh. Nauubos na nga ako. Char

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2 years ago

I experienced worst situations during last year pandemic lockdown... A financial crises in which I wanted to die but then I realized the pain my mother would feel after my death.. So I worked hard even as a waiter at a small hotel.. gained courage... Now I am good 😍 God opens 10 doors after shutting down 1. We just have to see carefully.

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2 years ago

Wow that's amazing, people should really have a positive mindset so that they have the will to face every problems in life πŸ’™

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2 years ago

Okay na sana eh .. I like how you express your thoughts about this issue. But at the last part, "drugs is not the cute..." Dun ako natawa 🀣 i know typo lang yun. Lol

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2 years ago

Bwahahaha halaaa buti napansin mo madams wahaha. Bat baga naging cute iyan wahahaha

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2 years ago

Hehehe I will reply on the first paragraph, problems after problems, you see I have this teacher who always, always love to give us problems, I mean math problems, he told us, to be able to get familiar with these problems, we must answer them, be it familiar or unfamiliar. Life maybe is different within these assignments. But is it? I have been reflecting from what it is the connection of life through solving and I have been slowly figuring the answer, when we are given a similar problems, we solve them fast, when we are given a hard problem we read more and find more answer. So maybe like life is like math problems. It has always a solution.

This is taking too long. Lol. But what amazes me, is that facing these problems, or solving them alone, will make you more even wiser. Just know a handy book or a very good mentor and everything else, will never matter. Yayyy

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2 years ago

Sabagay, magiging strength mo na yon pag nasanay kana diba, may idea kana at for sure sa nga dadating pang problema. Dapat din talagang sanayin ang sarili sa pag harap sa problema. Dahil never mawawala sa buhay yan, patu kaliit liitang bagay naku. Tama tama, solusyon is the key. Hahanapan sana, wag yong susukuan agad πŸ’™

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2 years ago

Yieee yas πŸ’š

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2 years ago

This is so sad Ruffa.. πŸ˜”

They didn't even asked but to judged directly even without knowing what the real happens..πŸ˜”πŸ’”

There are a lot of circumstances like this in life. Don't let ourselves down but neglect all the negativities then replace them with all positivity outlook in life, whatever challenges we need to be brave and continue to fight. We know at the end there are brighter days for us.❀️

God bless you Ruffa...πŸ™β€οΈ

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2 years ago

For sure, it happens in real life talaga. Dahil na rin siguro dahil di na nila ma take ang pain at ang solusyon nalang na alam nila ay yon ☹️

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2 years ago

Di rin natin sila masisisi lalo na pag wala na sa sarili at di na kaya ang pain...

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2 years ago

Never ending cycle of problems and solutions.. When you feel so down the more you need to pray and just keep praying😊

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2 years ago

Yeah, Prayer is the key. But some after facing a lot of problems also stopped believing in him you know ☹️

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2 years ago

Totoo din yan pero may nagsabi sa akin if ano daw ba mas gusto q to go through the storm alone or with God.. Napaisip tuloy aq, sabi q sbagay mas ok n yun may kasama hehe😊

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2 years ago

Sometimes we find comfort from the things that can destroy us. And as what mentioned above, drugs is not the cure for the problems. Waking up and realizing what the person had become will be its calling and a warning. Although, it would still depend on the person if he/she is going to consider to change.

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2 years ago

Totoo lang din, kahit alam na nila ang magiging resulta nag try pa rin sila. Mahirap din kasing kalaban ang loneliness at depression ee tsk.

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2 years ago

"Those people who you thought will help you in time of needs was nowhere to be found. They are gone, they already turned their back at you. They already judge you without even asking what really happened."

Right. This is sad reality even the person that I thought I can trust with betrayed me. πŸ₯²

They only believe on what they saw outside but they didn't even bother asking what really happened.

Andami kong judge na natanggap non. Kahit nga parents ko mas pinili nilang paniwalaan yung iba kesa sakin na anak at pamilya nila . Dahil sa mga memosa na yan, nasira at sinira nila tiwala ng Mama ko sakin πŸ˜žπŸ’”

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2 years ago

Pag may kailangan ang gagaling nila no tskk. Panira talaga ng buhay yang nga gossiper na iyan ee. Baka inggit lang din yan sila sayo πŸ™„

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2 years ago

Oo nga ate ropa gaya kwenekwento ko sayo. Buti nalang talaga diko na sila pinapansin HAHAHA bahala sila dyan basta ako masaya parin naman kahit wala sila sa buhay ko. Tsaka Oo ganyan talaga kapag titmosa, inggit lang.

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2 years ago

You are very good at writing about songs. I had the idea as well to try it. It is not so easy, because with songs only the songwriter knows what they meant, but you can create your own image of the song. Well done!

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2 years ago

Yayyy, thankieee. Share that idea to that πŸ’™

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2 years ago

Why so malalim? Why so hard to dig... Why walang parot sa gitna ng story? πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. Nagiging serious ka na beh

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2 years ago

Wahahahaha kasalanan nong mga kanta ko. Naghapon akong naka headset at nakikinig ng music naku wahahaha.

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2 years ago

Ansakit naman ate! Yung andami mo rin naman nagawa na tama o mabuti pero hindi nila yon nakita. Dahil puro yung pagkakamali mo lang napupuna. Bakit ganon? :( Pag sobra talaga depression na nararanasan kung ano ano naiisip na akala natin makakalutas ng problema natin sa buhay. But no. Nandyan pa rin ang problema, hindi sagot ang paglugmok sa isang bisyo. Hindi problema ang sagot sa problema. Sana lang yung mga ganitong tao ay nabibigyan ng pansin. Hays. :(

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2 years ago

your article DOES make sense sis. SO many things that can hurt us from being judged to many failures but we must learn to fight and not let the negativity in our mind wins over us kasi tayo lang din magsasuffer

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2 years ago

Kaya nga m, salamat. Ung iba kasi dahil sa kagustuhan na makalimot ang problema nagtetake na ng drugs no. Ang daming case na ganito ee. Dahil sa maraming problema na hindi na nawala.

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2 years ago

kaya nga. nakakapagod mabuhay but worth it naman sayang lang dahil yung iba di makita yung ganda ng buhay sa dami ng problema nila at di alam kung paano sosolusyunan. Aigoo kasryoso ng usapan. haha

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2 years ago

"You become addicted in it instead of finding yourself. You forgot your purpose and the drugs consume you."

Muntik na nung g9, nainpluwensyahan ako sa barkada pero natigil rin tas bumalik ako sa palaging pagiisa hehehehe

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2 years ago

Halaaa, tunay 😱. Buti nakaahon ka πŸ’™πŸ’™

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2 years ago

My friend, is really an experience one should always pray not to have.

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2 years ago

Yeah, sorry to hear that πŸ˜’

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2 years ago

This is so heartbreaking ate. "You died because of your Heroine". Ito talaga din e. Yung akala mo yun na yung tatanggal ng lahat ng pain mo, pero yun din pala yung mag eend ng life mo na sana may chance na magbago at mahalin ka pa. Ang sakit lang. Sobrang sayang! Yung hindi ka masayang nawala. ☹️ How I wish I can give a hug to those people experiencing pain right now just to remind them that despite of the people throwing bad things at them, they are still loved by someone and that they believe in them. β˜ΉοΈπŸ’—

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2 years ago

Maraming nakakaranas ng ganito ngayon Penpen πŸ’™Femfem, nakakalungkot lang dahil sa wala silang mahingan ng tulong, ung mga isinuka na na sila sa isang pagkakamali lang. Bad din kasi talaga yang mga drugs na yan ee. Pero ung iba nagtetake risk na para sa panandaliang kaligayahan πŸ˜’

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2 years ago