I don't know if heaven has problem with me for throwing all of those problems I have right now but I can only say two words. SCREW YOU!!! If I can't have a better life even after doing all my best then I'm better off to this world but before that, I will leave something that everything will remember. It will be marked on their memory and it will be made as a history.
I am just sick and tired of all of his. Do I really deserve all of this? Do I really deserve all of those failures and pain that I experience after all what I did. I think I didn't deserve it. I know I did my best, I know I did my everything just to fit it but why, why I can't get the happiness that I'm looking for? How will I be contented if there's nothing here with me? Do I deserve nothing?
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One night in a happy place. A lot of happy people, with the gang, the best friend, the family, the couple and even those kids. Lucky them for having a good life. Unlucky me for existing in this world with only a problems.
They are really having the time of their life and all I can do is to watch them, get jealous and sit in one corner of this abandoned like place with a cigarettes and alcohol on both of my hands. If only I have someone that I can hodl hands.
I am like this abandoned place, no one wants to get in or to check what's inside because there is not enough light. I am just like this place with no one besides it and just alone in this world. Even that one person I have is gone now.
Why is it so hard for me to even breath now. It's like there's a big lump on my throat and I am having a hard time swallowing. I just want to cry and that's what I did. It's too big and too heavy for me to carry this alone.
I wish someone can still save me from this misery. But there's no one here now, there's really no one. I am alone forever. And I only have one choice to end all of this. And the answer is in my backpack. I am ready to say goodbye now.
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And with a heavy heart, the man stand up to where he was sitting and started walking to where he plan to put that "thing." He will just set it in that place and kaboom.
I don't really want to do this. I don't want to involve anyone with my misery but even in my last breath I want to see people suffering with me. Call me selfish sure, I'm Sorry anyone.
Everything is set up now, just one push and it will make the whole place in fire. Just one push and mt misery will end. I have to do this. I will include everyone with me and no one can stop me now.
He's about to push the button when suddenly a little kid show up. He was all smile while holding an ice cream. And he is handing me that ice cream. Suddenly all of the hatred inside of me was gone.
Suddenly, I saw some sunshine and I started to see a light again in my darkest time. I am just looking at him while hodling my tears to fall. I don't know what's with the kid but it his smile.
"Are you okay? I'm watching you from a afar, you know. You are sad, you are not smiling that's why I can tell you're sad. That's why I ask Mom some coins and buy you this ice cream. It's strawberry, my favorite. I hope you'll like it too."
Just like that, everything is okay now. And I am so foolish to even think of setting this place on fire using as bomb. How can I even thought of it. There's a lot of innocent kids here.
"Mister, my shoulder is getting numb now. Don't you want this ice cream? I'll be very sad if you don't eat it but if you don't really want it then I can't do anything about it."
"No, No, No kid. I like it here, see I love it. I actually like chocolate ice cream but this one is not bad too. Thank you young man, you just save me you know. What's your name kid?"
"Oh, I am do glad. My name is Michael and I am 7 years old. I'm actually with my Mom and Dad and it's my birthday today. I am glad that I was able to treat you on my birthday, Mister?
"Oh, Josh, just call me John, Michael. And thanks you so much again."
"You're welcome, bye bye."
"Bye bye."
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I am so stupid to even think about all of this. I know there are people out there who has more problems than me. I know that but I am too weak that a little problem is enough to make me fall.
I forgot that one Man who will give me a hand only if ask to. How can I forgot that. But now that I can think right, I will ask Him some help and I know he will never let me down. I only have to ask.
--
The man get all of the bomb he planted on the place without noticing them and go directly to the precinct. He confess about his plan and turn over all of the bomb, tools and everything that he has. And he also told them what made him change his mind.
I know all of us has this heavy load of problems that we are carrying on our shoulder. But you know, we don't have to be alone. We don't need to carry all of it alone. Because we actually have that someone that we can ask for help, all we have to do is to reach for His hand and ask for His help. Don't forget that guys, we have Him. Our Savior.
UPDATE: I forgot to attach this. I actually thought of today's story because of this. The ending is far different from the song coz it's more painful and the ending is just sad. While in my story it's a little sad but still, no one get hurt and it's just different. Let's just say that.
Lead Image from Unsplash
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Wow the child is sent from above talaga