A hot afternoon my lovelies, even though it's 3pm here I can still the shining shimmering splendid heat of Mr. Sunny. Well, this affects my mood. Today is the day that I await where we could finally set a schedule for our wedding but unfortunately it didn't happen. Since the Mayor is not yet taking his oath taking and it was moved this June 16. Actually that's the day that we planned to get married but it won't happen. I don't know if the wedding will happen or if we have to wait for next month. We choose to do it in civil as we are in a hurry, we never expect that it will be too late. If we only knew this would happen, we decided to do it in the church in the first place. Gez! I always go back and forth to the city hall but they always respond that "The mayor is not taking his oath or the mayor is busy". That made me even more exhausted. Knowing that I have to travel in the hot weather. Thinking about it made me stressed, as when there's a schedule it has to be 1 week before we know since some of my family and his family are needed to file a leave. Getting married wasn't easy lol.
Enough with this, let's move on to the prompt that was initiated by @JonicaBradley about fear. Without further ado let's start.
Do you fear something? An animal may be? Fear of heights? Afraid of the dark? Well, whether we like it or not we have something that we are frightened of.
Fear of being left behind
This is not being successful what I mean. This is about being left by the person I love the most. I've been experiencing a lot of heartbreaks way back then, not just once, twice, thrice but a lot more. I'm afraid that I'm the reason why people leave me even though I already show them the real me, or is that the reason? I'm far from perfect, I have flaws, mistakes and insecurities, they have too but I stay. No matter how much I see the worst in them I never them but when they see mine, that's when it ends. Thinking about it made me realize, if I am the mistake? Am I? I guess I'm not. Until now, I'm always afraid that my partner will leave me, not because I don't trust him but because I don't trust people around him. Betrayal, traitor and temptation will always be there. As of today, I still have this little feeling but since my partner always shows me how much he loves me then I'll settle for it. Love, trust, compromise.
Fear of leaving nothing
This might seem complicated, but I am afraid to die without doing anything. Without pursuing my dreams, without a legacy or even just a lesson that I can leave to my parents or even to the community. I may not have everything but I wanted to have something that people can remember me when I'm gone. I don't want to be no one else or worse people will forget me as I do nothing.
Fear of being a failure
I know I'm alone who feels this. The pressure of this thinking that I might be a failure as a daughter, students, partner and soon to be a mother. I'm frightened to know the truth that I am just a disappointment. Just a woman who doesn't achieve anything in life, a woman who is just nothing compared to others and me as a woman who ain't perfect and will never be.
I'm not afraid to die, I'm afraid that I can't live something. I'm not afraid to give everything but I'm afraid to be left hanging again. I'm not afraid to try but I'm afraid to always fail. Life is indeed a matter of surprise, whether we like it or not unexpected events will happen.
If you wanted to join the prompt just follow this simple steps:
Join the Promptly Jonica community here
Write anything about FEAR
Write 100% original content
Write at least 600 words for Rusty to be happy
Submit your article to PromptlyJonica
Tag, @JonicaBradley
Have fun!
Lead image is taken from EncyclopediaBritannica.com
Flexing my generous sponsors ❤️
Those all seem to be very valid fears. Life is big and messy. So much can happen. But, it's not you! You aren't a mistake!