How to improve ourselves?
"Before you speak ask yourself if what you are going to say is true, is kind, is necessary, is helpful. If the answer is no, maybe what you are about to say should be left unsaid".
When we talk about improvement, what comes to your mind? Perfection? Looking great? Adding more value to yourself? Changing your lens to a better perspective? Every human being wants a change and this can't be done while sitting on a spot and expecting an awesome change for yourself. Change is constant and everyone keeps changing from old ways into a new ones and we call this an improvement.
If you want to improve your writing skills, you go through those who have experience and are professional to help guide you so you can also be better.
You want to improve your cooking and you need more styles and recipes to make your technique amazing, you go online to see how experts are making different meals every day and when you decide to try yours, even though you keep failing and making mistakes, we are told to keep practising again until we are comfortable of doing the best.
Improvement is all about practising until it is better and you are comfortable with it.
Let's take a look at some ways to improve ourselves, especially becoming the better person we want to be because no one wants to remain stuck but to bring peace to themselves.
Stop discussing your personal life with every second person.
You have every right to your privacy and no one should infringe in it except you allow it. Having the right to your privacy is an ability to determine when, how and for what purpose you want your personal information to be handled by others.
Privacy is everything, tell them what is necessary.
The truth is that there are things you should keep to yourself instead of telling others and putting your life in their hands because when the time comes, the person you believe to have trusted will use it against you. No one can ever keep your secret even if you tell them not to. Our mouths are wired to speak anytime depending on the situation on ground and when words come out of your mouth, it is like an egg that when broken can never be packed up again.
A tip to protect your privacy is to limit the personal information about your life that you share with other people, and keeping them to yourself will make you have peace with no one standing against you.
Your personal information is different from a secret. The difference is that your secret might include those past mistakes you have done and making people know could be dangerous especially in the future while your personal information might be things you intend to do to be successful and it is not everything people would know about you. Make them know the ones that are necessary perhaps which may also help them too.
Though we expose our secret to make the other person learn from it which is better, and when it is being shared with the wrong people, they would take it up against you someday which may then delay your progress. It is not everyone that needs to know things about you. At least your family is there to know more about you than trusting an outsider who would go around talking behind you.
The only time a secret is shared to learn from them is when the other person is trying to go in the way you already went and not wanting them to make such mistakes, you guide them through your experience and how you were able to overcome and become who you are.
But when your information goes into the wrong hand, it degrades your personality which makes you look stupid for ever revealing yourself to them. Keep your personal information to yourself and if you must think of talking to someone, make sure you have studied and perceived such a person and if you are still unquestionable about the person, then talk to your siblings or someone in your family. Your family will protect you no matter what happens.
I remembered when I got an admission and I was sharing a room with my friend. We both processed the admission together. I had a break up in my relationship and I thought she was someone I could talk to since I have known her while studying at the college of education. I opened up to her about the breakup and how we had fun together. This lady went to share it with her school father and the next day, the guy called me wanting to speak with me.
He started encouraging me about the situation in my relationship. He said his spirit told him of what I was passing through and wanted to advise me. Immediately, I knew she had gone to tell him everything. I was weakened but decided not to say anything or confront her, but from that day onward, I stopped sharing things about myself with her.
There are information about you that would help you get to where you wish to be, but opening up to them and letting them know of your plans would make them do things at your back and ruin everything for you.
You don't know who is happy or sad about your achievement and sharing things with them means you are placing your life in their hands to take control of it and they would happily shake you from right to left until you are nothing.
To be continued…..
Thanks for reading
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[May 15, 2022] (No 135 article for the year)
I stopped sharing my secret with people , the day I was betrayed by my own friend..we had a little fight and she posted all my secrets to everyone..I was so downcastef