Middle Child Feels

Raise your hand if you can relate with me. Obviously, I have two siblings and I am in the middle. The first child is a girl, she's my ate and we have a 3 years and 3 months gap. Our bunso (youngest sib) is a boy. It took my parents 9 years and 4 months to have a boy, imagine that. And this is me, a young adult, who strives hard in life.

So what's the issue mostly to being a middle child?

Middle Child is often neglected

I don't know if it applies to every middle child but I sometimes felt that. You know, sometimes our parents focus on the eldest child, because they are mostly the responsible and the smart one. But they could also be the rebellious one.

Since they are the first child, our parents attention were on them. First child which means, first experience of being a mom and dad, so they tend to be super hands on.

On the other hand, youngest sibs are the "babies" in the family. They always get what they want and they are sometimes the "spoiled" one. 😶

So, where's the middle child? What's the role of the middle child?

A shadow. They are the most neglected. Ironically, eldest don't want any attention, youngest sibs feel like their parents are super possessive, but still gets all the attention. On the other hand, middle children crave for attention, but cant't hardly get one.

Black Sheep to the family

It feels like they really want to belong but still does not fit to the group. You know, there were times or most of the time, I feel that. I felt like I didn't belong to our family no matter how much I tried.

And you know, it's okay. It's okay not to force yourself to belong. Just do your best because at the end of the day, you still have yourself.

Unappreciated

This one hits really hard to me. I always feel unappreciated. No matter how much I tried, no matter how much I do my best, they don't still noticed. They focused on my mistakes. And I know I am not the only one who felt this. To the middle child out there, I know you also felt this.

The most painful part is that, you did your best for them, but they don't see your best. They only see your worst. One mistake, and they will judge your whole personality.

Trying to prove yourself

And since you're unappreciated, you try to prove yourself to them. You try to catch their attention through your good works. You try to excel to wherever you are. You try to be the best because you know they don't see you like that, but atleast you try. 😌

It's not easy to prove yourself to them. You don't need to prove it to them, just do your thing. Do the things that will make you happy. Their affirmation isn't needed, sometimes.

Independent and relies more in their friends

Family should be your emotional support, but since some middle children can't find it, they tend to rely on their friends. That's why they are mostly not in the house because they feel that they feel loved when they are with their friends. And you got misunderstood by it. They think you are rebellious when all you need is love. You are loved my dear.

That's why they learned a lot of being independent, because first of, they were used to it.

Bottom Line:

I didn't generalize this. I wrote the things that I observed to myself and to other middle children. To be honest, being a middle child is hard. I am glad to hear if you don't feel that to you're family, but mostly we felt that.

At the end of the day, they are your family. They don't mean to hurt you. They don't mean to make you feel that way. 🥲

You, just like me, you are loved. You don't need to prove yourself to someone who can't appreciate your worth. You're worthy of love, we are all worthy of love, not just to the middle children.

Even if you are born first, second, third and so on, if you all felt all the things I mentioned, please know that someone loves you. Your family loves you. God loves you.

That's all! Thanks for reading!

Lead Image was from Amazon.com.