On Vacation

Well, not me. I so hope it is me but no.

My thinking self is. I just feel so tired even though I have not done anything physically really tiring. Know what I mean? My being busy the past days, I guess is taking a toll on me - draining me tired and well leaving me with wanting nothing to write - long post, that is. Apparently I still have spikes and spurts of energy to post in noise. And it is sometimes a miracle my comments and interactions seem relevant still.

The loop goes, I wake up, say a prayer (guilty of not having a decent quiet quality time lately), check some messages, try to get myself to "start the engine". I go with questions:

1. What day is it again, today? Is it Friday?

2. Do I have an early meeting that I need to prepare for?

3. If I answer yes on the 3rd question, am I expected to speak or report on something in that meeting?

4. If not, yay to slow morning coffee. If yes I'd better get moving and put on my adult self, STAT!

And that loops in for the next five days.

It must be that the year is almost ending, and all the compliance and whatever was committed for us was expected to be completed within the next few weeks before everyone goes on their holiday mood. Yes, just mood. That means we would still be logging in while some and most and normally other workers will probably be off vacationing somewhere with their loved ones. Most of us are not taking time offs except for the holidays itself. I am, however, moving my office to the province some time near Christmas. I am gonna go visit my grandmother and spend Christmas with her. That! I am looking forward to.

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Also, aside from that travel to the province, I am looking forward to ice skating, snow ball fighting, sledding and skiing. Of course, I AM KIDDING. We do not have snow in the Philippines.

Anyway, because of the holiday happenings and expectations we all are suddenly very busy. I so super thank God my supposedly classes got moved to next year. That clears out my first two hours of shift and I can concentrate on my task and then have portions of the after -shifts helping out my colleagues.

No worries, we have time to chat and laugh at our situation and we do take breaks but even then, stress and pressure is real. And you feel it AFTER the adrenaline (?) rush. It is admittedly a mix of fun and not fun after all - challenge to complete as much as possible and help out colleagues too.

After that, I am brain fried. There was even one time after declaring day is done and over. I moved to the living room to destress and start watching Netflix. I lied down on the sofa and after few deep breaths, I was in dreamland. I had to force myself to wake up and then move my silly self back to the bedroom.

The only real break I get was that after shift that I go out and stare up the sky. Thank God for a patch of unobstructed view (save for the wires) of the night sky, the stars - the Orion is my constant companion - and the November breeze. It resets my head from thinking of work.

The sight puts my hyper thinking brain to a stop. And just enjoy the view. Then it calms down.

God’s splendor is a tale that is told, written in the stars. Space itself speaks his story through the marvels of the heavens. His truth is on tour in the starry vault of the sky, showing his skill in creation’s craftsmanship.

Psalms 19:1 TPT

https://bible.com/bible/1849/psa.19.1.TPT

He sets his stars in place, calling them all by their names. How great is our God! There’s absolutely nothing his power cannot accomplish, and he has infinite understanding of everything.

Psalms 147:4‭-‬5 TPT

https://bible.com/bible/1849/psa.147.4-5.TPT

And the beauty before me eases my thoughts for the night before I sleep.

It is easy to get overwhelmed by things we get to be busy with or things that occupy our attention too much - stressing or not. Pays to look up and be reminded that life is not all that.

There are far wonderful things to think of.

So weekends are a real blessing. Hopefully, tomorrow (more like in a while) I get to recharge myself some more. And get in the mood for the upcoming holiday, too. The Christmas list needs to be started (I am so late).

And also start on musing :

What Christmas is to me? Why do I celebrate it? What is it about it that I am looking forward to?

Ever asked yourself that? I mean we are used to having it as a holiday celebration and all. And we have the staple celebrations - corporate parties, family gatherings, etcetera. But personally, really, what is its meaning to you?

Without the tree, without the gifts, without the usual festivities, how would you celebrate it? Or will you be celebrating it still?

I think those are the questions I have in mind that is why celebrating Christmas in foreign place is still in my bucket list.

What is your story? Do tell!

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