Happiness Is Not A State, It Is A Process

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2 years ago
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Who can say what keeps humanity happy? What is it, that would make us live our lives without limits, without worries. I think the answer to this question is not simple and I must say, that it would be very difficult to answer.

What are people's goals in life? Is it to get rich, so that they no longer have material problems, or to be famous and live their daily lives with recognition? This means, that most people on Earth would not live the way they do, which means that their lives would change dramatically in a positive direction.

Yet what do we hear every day, what have we been indoctrinated with throughout our lives? Learn as much as you can, so that when you get good results, you can get a job, where you can earn a lot of money and get ahead. With this advice, people are given the impression, that they have to study hard and work hard every day. For how long? That is a very good question to ask.

So the question is given. We have studied, we have worked and now where to go from here. Our goal in life is not to work for a lifetime. That is what people would not call happiness. They push themselves every week, every day. Month after month, year after year. They work their way through life and what they really want is what they miss out on. They live like most people, who have worked throughout their lives.

Happiness Is Not A State, It Is A Process

What is the recipe for happiness? The answer to that question is that, there is no recipe. If I thought there was a recipe, I would think how unfortunate I am, that I don't have that recipe.

Happiness does not equal prosperity. Most people think, that happiness is an emotional state of mind to strive for as a goal, and otherwise it is very specific. Let's say it is a special thing, that is planned and worked out down to the smallest detail and, if you have achieved all that, then you can be happy.

Happiness is a process in the right direction. So it is not a goal, it is a direction. Not a state, but a process. But what about moments of happiness? Yes, the emotional state, that we are experiencing at a particular moment can be a moment of happiness. That extraordinary, wonderful moment, that we experience as happiness.

The difference is whether I am happy in that moment or whether I am living my life as a happy person. The question is which one I am striving for, because if happiness is a process, that is going in the right direction, that is my life is a process, that is going in the right direction, then I am striving to be a happy person. It will follow, that the ups and downs of life will be tolerable or acceptable.

Image Source: https://medium.com/@coinjordan/happiness-is-a-process-not-a-destination-1936a2bfdd8c

Why Do Negative Things Keep Our Energy Levels Down?

I'm not sure we should be looking for reasons for this question, because it may not make our lives better. Why is it, that in many things we see the bad first? Perhaps it is, because somewhere deep down in our souls, we want to prepare ourselves for the bad things, that may come our way in life. We want to see where danger is lurking and we want to know how to deal with it.

We might also think, that if we focus too much on the bad, negative things, we attract them. That may be true, but let's not overdo it. Many people say, that life is hard. When we hear this statement, we relax, because we are aware, that not only our life is difficult, but that of others too.

Even though it is difficult, we can still be happy. It matters a lot what life has done to whom or what it has done to me, but what matters even more is what I do to others.

Why Is This Happening To Me?

I've heard this question many times from others and I've asked myself a few times too. If you are facing a difficulty in life, it is not the words you are given, that will help you, but what you can cling to. That is the most important thing.

When the question is "why me.".., "why with me"..., "why now when I"... these are very me-centered questions. They're ego driven questions. I take the good things for granted, but the bad things I take for granted, I don't understand, because then the bad things are an individual blow. That's what I mean by self-centered.

No doubt each person has their own responsibilities, but we also need to be able to be more, than just alone in difficult times. We alone cannot change the world. What we can do is to create an oasis around ourselves. We could start with our family. They are the closest to us, but we can also expand the world and add our friends and together we can start to work differently.

These oases can come together, where I know I am going through life's difficulties no doubt, I don't deny it, but I know I am not alone, because I am in a space, where I can refresh myself and sometimes that is enough.

I know it sounds like a kind of lock-in. This is not to say, that I want to change my own environment. It can be a danger to close myself off and ignore the difficulties.

Learned helplessness is what is typical of us humans. When something happens in life, that we can't change on our own, a passive inertia kicks in as a response. The good news is that, we can ask ourselves what we could do differently.

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Comments

Happiness. Such a simple word. But when we ask everyone out there what they really want , I can confidently say the ultimate goal is happiness. A happy life. Why do I work hard? To earn money. Why? To be rich. Why do you wanna be rich? To be able to buy things I need and want. Why though? Because it means I am blessed. To what sense? It makes me happy. People are such happiness-seeking individuals. And it is not tht hard to achieve. You are right, even in the hard times, one can ba happy too.

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2 years ago

You probably heard the term, that money can't by happiness. It is even in a song I know. Happiness is definitely a broad term and not always come with money, although many people are happy, who have money.

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2 years ago

It reminds me of my philosophy teacher, where he introduced many philosopher, that a man has different stages in life. And after doing all of these, they find themselves in the mountain of idk what mountains, and meditate after that. Before, I never really noticed I wasn't happy, not until, I noticed that I become sadder and sadder everday. When I don't learn anything, I become sad. When I felt that everything is going nowhere, I felt sad. When I saw someone happy I feel sad for myself.

And maybe its just that we noticed everything around us, and what lack within us, that everything becomes, more sadder. But the truth is, we are just sad we are not unhappy. 😊

$ 0.05
2 years ago

Yes, sadness and unhappiness are not the same, although they are very similar. So are happiness and cheerfulness. You may have been sad because of those things, but they are no reason to be unhappy.

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2 years ago

What is the recipe for happiness?

For me, it is acceptance. This is probably the one thing that gives me the positive vibe ever since.

As mentioned in some of my articles, I used to be so sad about my situation. I pretended to be happy but deep inside, I was in pain.

But when I began to accept myself and embrace myself, I started seeing the bigger picture. I stopped wondering the what-ifs and began to appreciate the things I can do. And later on, I learned to improve myself and freed myself from things/thoughts that used to haunt me down.

$ 0.05
2 years ago

Self-acceptance and self-love play a big role in our daily lives. Yes I agree with you about the what if's and what would have been if's are just assumptions and not facts, they never happened and it's a shame to be sad about something that doesn't exist.

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2 years ago

And it's a waste of time and emotions thinking of something that doesn't exist. Hehe.

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2 years ago

I would agree to you. There is happiness in everything if we will enjoy the process and be mindful. Have the understanding of things as how and why it happen.

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2 years ago

You need to see exactly the process. The path that leads to happiness. There will be difficult times in between, but that doesn't mean we have to be unhappy.

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2 years ago

Yes truly

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2 years ago