The Weekend Laughter Show

The COMedy  show is here again. This time, I am going to be as blunt as possible. In the last two days, I have been up and doing that I could not do any blog and that weighed me off seriously. Iooked empty and incomplete but in my tight schedule and working with people from different organisations these past days, I saw many things which I would like to share. 

The Phone Syndrome

Amaka, the lady who was assigned to lead a tram to cover the 20th anniversary of my school, was right before I received a call. The caller asked her where she was, and Amaka said in the market. 

Woooot!!! Market? 

In my mind, the question was jogging. How could people tell so many lies? So much that even the air will seize for a moment. 

I kept looking at her from a distance. Perhaps, she never knew I heard all she had said. 

During the event, the press team led by Amaka called me for an interview which she was to grant me. 

The first question she asked was:

How did you come about this tactic to put up such a great event? 

Then I replied her:

In the market. 

The interview came to an end as Amaka shouted at the cameraman. Cut, cut. 🤣😅🤣😂

The New Boy In Town. 

During one of those holidays back in the day. A boy from a town called Sapele in Delta named Osas visited my hood. In our discussion, he mentioned that in Sapele, when men wake from bed, they would simply just was their mouth with ogogoro (locally brewed gin). 

This took us aback. Why would they do so was the question we asked Osas? His response was that it was a lifestyle for the men and it had been there for ages. 

Every morning, we gathered to play scrabble at the Adebanjos. But one morning, Mr Adebanjo called all his sons into his room. We didn't know what had happened. 

When Femi, my friend and the last son of Mr Adebanjo came from his father's room he beckoned on Osas and I. We followed him outside and he asked:

My father's alcohol bottle has been emptied and he is furious. It is because of his hypertension. 

Then Osas said to us:

Are you sure the bottle isn't leaking? 👁👁

Leaking. How come? Have you ever heard that bottles could leak? It was then I started to suspect him as the culprit. 

By adding one to two, I deduced that a boy from Sapele, where men use alcohol to wash their mouth is where Osas hails from, the logic is that Osas may grow up to be like Sapele men too. And he has started practicing already.😂😅😅😅

At last, he said he was sorry. That he was already addicted to taking alcohol. What a life. 

Mr Adebanjo had to counsel us that it was not intentional that he was taking it but to manage his health. He asked us to stay away from alcohol. That day, we remain Osas, Sapele Man😂🤣😅

Well

One young man who claimed to be able to speak English was asked to interpret to a local chief. His interpretation caused a whole community. 

They had a visitor who wanted to help in any way possible. When asked the people would preferred the most, he simply said:

Well.

Before he could continue his statement, the visitor asked that the whole community be giving a well, as a source of water. 😂🤣😅😂😅

My Wonderful Neighbour. 

Anytime he passes by something must miss. No so has been a turn in my flesh. Our nature of building allowed one to see what's cooking in the apartment of the other. 

Some weeks back, I was cooking titus stew and the whole building smells good. I was also eager to have a taste of the stew. Before I could return from.my room, the pot of stew was missing. It was so painful but I had to let go. 

Just this afternoon, after thinking of all the pain my neighbour had caused me, I decided to set a trap. 

I packed all the washed peels of beans into an empty pot and put it on my stove. I kept watching. My neighbour sneaked out from nowhere and carried my pot filled with smelling bean peel. I have been sitting outside waiting for him to come out. 

I can hear his girlfriend talking about the mess he had made in the room. 

Today, I am going nowhere. He will breathe it till there is no more smell.😅🤣🤣

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First Posted Here