Sarcasm Saturday 6 - Rude Crypto for Blockchain OGs

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I always considered that the Cryptoverse is rude, as a place where you go from orgasm to rekt in a matter of hours. It's all about DYOR and calculated investments, patience and advance planning. If you treat crypto as a gamble is a big chance you will get screwed! 

The life in the Cryptoverse is mirroring real life, where you need luck, knowledge and money to be able to see the beauty of the world. Yes... you will need money, but money without knowledge means nothing! Go all-in in Doge and then cry that Elon lied to you, spend your money in the casino and complain the house always win! Be prepared to lose and you will enjoy the small wins!

Be careful which crypto-influencer you listen, be careful who guides your investments, and always be extra careful when giving instructions to others. Never assume the other side understands what you mean and always be prepared that the listener may be stupid!

Don't get angry if your crypto portfolio drops 40%, don't cry when it goes 60% down and don't let your inner child be traumatized by the side effects of crypto. The scars are signs of the battle you survived, and you will soon become a Crypto Veteran! 

Maybe you don't know but I have MILF and CumRocket (Cummies) in my portfolio. I was chatting with a P0xBro not long ago what rude-funny crypto token we could mint and guess what... all of them are already minted. If you missed all the 100x "to-the-moon!" tokens, you can still buy some really cheap WANK

Anyone remembers when you could stake BNB to get HARD? This was such a good joke topic back in 2021, and the guy who choose the name probably was kicked out of the company. I still think I should have sold my HARD long time ago .... 

As a content creator, I hade spammy comments ... they are the rudest thing ever! I hate the "nice", "good article","well done" but this user (bot) beat all records and posted 109 comments to the last 109 articles from readcash

Will be rude to not talk about Bitcoin, Crypto OGs, Maximalists and achievements. Dear OGs ... I was the first ever referee to be paid in crypto!  Peter McCormack buying Bedford FC! The host of the What Bitcoin Did podcast rebranded the club as Real Bedford FC. Bedford’s new head chairman pledged to help Real Bedford to climb to the Premier League. Read all about it in Playing the Bitcoin Game: Real Bedford v Shefford & Campton

I know that Bitcoin Racing Team will take a lot of media coverage in the future, and Bragato talked about it even before it was a thing. I seen one of the Bitcoin Racing cars at McMullen Park and looks like a top ... gear! 

Believe it or not but I have a BTC ATM in the shopping center. I was always think Romania lacks crypto adoption but it looks is one step ahead of others. You can casually buy some Bitcoin while you are going to buy potatoes and onions.

Enough with monkey business and sugar-coated crypto campaigns. It's time to go rude and tell people we are crypto OGs and we survived both 2017 and 2022! If you feel my battlecry ... feel free to scan my QR and send some $BAN to PVM. Feeling old lately and may need some potassium to get strong again! 

We all have bags of shitcoins, and some may have diamond hands ... but this Torum non-tradeble are totally useless. It took some effort to collect them, and the expecation was they will boost earnings and stuff. Big BS from the Valiant Bull as they are just pictures, not even right-click and save NFTs.

OGs will agree with me but modern crypto is going dumb! All kind of newbies doing DeFi platforms and bridges ... and getting hacked as easily as doing a 4 pieces puzzle. The crypto investor also gone lower and lower in the IQ challenge, from solving the Byzantine General's Problem to Doge, Shiba, Puppy or whatever! 

 

I used this in the last episiode but it's so good I can use it twice! Never forget that life is about perspective! You may think you are the Alpha but for some people you will always be a bell-end! 

Here we go! Weekly report and 9h and 49 minutes daily average screen time. When I seen this I told myself "F*ck off dude! You're crazy!"  Only Google Chrome with 17 hours, Metamask with 11 and Facebook with 7 hours. I can accept that I do my work on the phone, Metamask is clearly crypto and defi focused ... but 7 hours of Facebook is really a waste of time.

It got a bit better in August, as I tried to reduce the screen time. Chrome with nearly 22 hours and Discord with 5 and a half - content creation and DAO calls! Facebook down to 4 hours, making 240 minutes of useless scrolling through people's perfect fake lifes.

I reduced the screen time and walked more in the nature. I even tried this India Pale Ale (IPA) with over 100 worldwide awards... it was horrible! Six dimension experience BS as the beer was tasting like an burned chicken nugget with a sour after taste. Maybe IPA is not for me and I should stick to wines and whiskey. 

Took me 16 months to write another Crypto Income Report! I stopped because I was thinking I am rude, showing off my success stories and the bags of crypto I was getting. Now that I lost it all, will be interesting to share the journey towards a fresh crypto portfolio. This MF still has skills! I earned $675 las month and all is expanded in July July ... La Vie En Rose! - Crypto Income Report

Because I like to be extravagant, I paid for my pub meal with the Crypto.Com card! I am using that cheap piece of plastic for over an year, and is good to earn crypto while eating like a pig! Sharing this photo with you, and later on the high cholesterol drama! 

I tell my OG's to be ready for Optimistic Governance and check the Optimism L2 but no one is listening! The first $OP airdrop was sweet and the tokens keep pumping even in bear market! Is not to late crypto bros! Rumors about a 2nd $OP airdrops for those who didn't dump the first gift! Are you ready for the Optimistic Summer?

Sometimes I am humble, sometimes I am a show-off. Just to let you know I reached 4800 noisecash subscribers. It's not 5k yet but has the magic of 22 in it! 

This bed dude has all the rights to be upset. He was DM with an indecent offer and was let down by the pervert. We life in a society where the size in the pants doesn't matter anymore! Listen to me and remember ... the block size it's all that matter! BCH has bigger block size, faster transfers and cheapest fees than BTC... just saying! 

It's time to wrap it up and make sure we keep safe! Always protect yourself and don't share STD or your seeds with strangers! It's even worst if you are keeping BAYC pictures in your playroom! 

What started as a joke has become one of the most expected weekend articles. Sarcasm Saturday has quickly become a hit and all this was possible because of you... the READER! 

Sarcasm Saturday #1 - How bad was the dip of the dip?  

Sarcasm Saturday #2 - From "To the Moon!" to cockroach mode!  

Sarcasm Saturday #3 - WTF is wrong with 2022?  

Sarcasm Saturday #4 - The Positivity Monster and the Bear Market

Sarcasm Saturday #5 - The night is long and full of terrors!

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Comments

I love your sense of humour Paul! I haven't seen this particular IPA yet, but I tried Hazy Jane with guava and it's my new favourite drink :D

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2 years ago

I do try some Brewdog stuff now and then but usually not a bear guy

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2 years ago

I turn into a beer girl in the summer 😅

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2 years ago

Nice one, PVM! Glad I checked this out. By the way, 7 hours on FB is, indeed, a total waste of time. But how come you're using Chrome instead of Brave? Hehe. Congrats for. Your 4.8k followers. Road to. 5k soon!

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2 years ago

The answer is laziness! :)) On laptop I use only Brave but on mobile I was to lazy to swap as Chrome has all my links, bookmarks and password saved

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2 years ago

I think you can sync your bookmarks to your brave browser. Hehe. Well, at least, you reduced your screentime.

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2 years ago

[spam]

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2 years ago

[spam]

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2 years ago

[spam]

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2 years ago

Now this is a post with different WTFs as I read along lol!

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2 years ago

The Sarcasm Saturday series is aimed to be different

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2 years ago

Another sacasm Saturday filled with humor, and a lot of lessons to learn. Can't stop laughing

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2 years ago

Glad you enjoy it!

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2 years ago

Wait..are those your food? Too many....you like fried foods eh 😅

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2 years ago

It was a meal out with the family, more like a picnic! I don't really like fried foods but a pub meal is nice once in a while

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2 years ago