Tomorrow is my biopsy: I don't know if I'm really okay.

It's been a few years since I was diagnosed with a cyst and at that time it was still small. I was first taken to take medicine for my period because it was too early.

2018, I have an ex. My ex is very dear to me and I really don't want to lose him, at this time I will have to undergo treatment to completely get rid of the lump. In this case, he told me that "You're going to die, and you don't want to see me happy yet."

When he said that I was very hurt, I just thought I shouldn't seek medical treatment because maybe it would be better for me to just die. Disappear slowly, that sort of thing.

I didn't think about those times, what was the purpose of my life and what my life was like in this world. I became too closed because I thought no one loved me.

Last month, while I was having a period I suddenly felt severe pain in my abdomen. I feel like I'm going to be in so much pain, the pain that you almost don't know how to handle and how to think that it will go away as well.

I suddenly thought what if I undergo something again? That I will continue the treatment that I did not continue before because I already feel to myself that I am having a hard time.

Nito lang ay nagpacheckup ako, nakitaan ako ng 11cm an bukol sa pelvic area at nagulat ako kasi malaki nasiya.

Kahapon, pumunta kami sa doctora ko at pinakita and ultrasound, agad niyakong nirequest ng biopsy bukas at agad niyakong sinabihan na kailangan na namin ng 2nd opinion galing sa ibang doctor.

Ang laki ng gagastusin, as biopsy palang gagastos na agad ako ng 1.5k at a second ultra sound gagastos ako ng another 1.5k sa city proper.

My doctor immediately told me that "Your pelvic cyst is very big. You know that what we have to chase here is your life, and your life is also what we have to fight for. Don't wait until next month. "

My mother recently found out, it is very painful to think that even she is struggling with my illness. I feel crushed as well. I saw her crying and I saw how her tears dropped, even though I felt scared. I don't want to die, I want to lift them up first and I want to make up for all their sacrifices first.

I feel so heavy. I’m so struggling and hurting for myself.

All the money I save here for treatment goes, I don't know where to get the money when I need a lot for surgery. All this, I'll just trust my fight with the lord, I know I'm not alone.

Join me in this battle of mine, I need courage now.