Ex: How are you?

What will you do if all of a sudden you will receive a notification coming from a person that you have forgotten already and asks, "HOW ARE YOU?"

Like, you're already at peace and contented, you have forgotten already the heartaches and the pain you felt ages ago, then one day, someone from your past will come back as if nothing happened and they dare to ask, HOW ARE YOU? When they left you on a cliff-hanging area and now that you've moved on, they are trying to crawl slowly again into your life. They will say sorry casually as if they just tease you and it didn't leave a scar in your heart.

There could be reasons why they come back. First, it could be because they are assuming that you will accept them, despite the pain you felt when they left. The replacement didn't exceed your standard probably, and they are thinking that you will be timid and will accept them wholeheartedly. It's like they want to activate the feelings you had once for them so you will take them back.

Second, the guilt is probably hunting them for hurting you or he wanted to make things right because he realized that he cannot find someone like you. The audacity!

So how to react if your Ex suddenly comes back?

1. This could be risky, but, you should reply without showing any emotions. This is to make them feel that you have no more interest. Or you could make a reply with one or two words only. Just a dry conversation. No emojis. No typical happy vibes. Just let him feel that it's all casual. Don't make it obvious that there's an effect when he messaged you. Send him late replies, unlike the old times when the excitement was still there. But, if you feel something like, nervousness, annoyance, or excitement, you have to control yourself. Take that chance to become hard as a rock to the person who hurt you. Until his presence becomes a burden to you and has no value anymore.

2. You can take that opportunity for closure. It will be the chance you can ask him questions that bothered you for the longest time. Take that opportunity to say the things you want to say to him. It's not like trying to get back to the past, it's just for confirmation and your peace of mind, especially if the breakup is sudden. They said that talking about the past brings peace to the present. Maybe in that way, you both can find the true closure you are looking for.

My ex-boyfriend and I broke up how many days after we graduated from college. For some time, we were in an LDR kind of relationship and I was able to bear it. It was for our internship. Both of us are busy and it was the start of all the chaos in the relationship. Until he broke up with me, telling me he can't bear LDR anymore, that he was tired and everything. I tried fixing us. I went to him and he said he doesn't want me anymore. I left his place with a broken heart that day while going back to my place.

So a year after, I was stunned to see a notification from him asking for a friend request. I was already fine, I moved on and was happily single. I accepted his request. Minutes after accepting his request he messaged me. I was just going with the flow of our conversation. In the middle of our conversation, he endorsed the product that he and his girlfriend are selling. Isn't it weird to do business with your ex? But, I just thought to myself we're both over it and it's all in the past. I've forgiven him even without his apology. We meet up for the product. I could just tell him to deliver it to my place but I wanted to test myself if I could feel something else like the feelings I had before. But, yeah, nothing left but just memories. It was all clear to me. There was no more pain and anger.

3. Block him from all your social media accounts. It's not bitter. But it could be your way of helping out yourself to move on. Don't let that person enter your way again and make a mess in your head. But if it happens outside social media like he will appear all of a sudden, I think it would be better if you will not talk to him. Don't give him attention. He should feel that you're already okay. That you don't care anymore.

Think about the sleepless nights you spent crying and trying to get over that person. Protect yourself, guard yourself, you're old enough and you've been through a lot already. Let yourself rest. You are worthy.

Lead image from Google.