It's Hard to Live with Disappointments.

Expectations versus the reality. It's really hard for us people to be slave with other people's expectations. Those people who are living in pretending in their lives. As a brother, as a student, as a student -athlete, as a son and as a person it's is really hard to prove myself to other people, yet they don't deserve my efforts and time to prove to them that I am enough. It's very hard to have a standard to meet for them to know that I wasn't doing the wrong thing.

I am in the point of my life right now where I am afraid to disappoint my parents and family. I am trying my best to be honest to them and being transparent. It's hard to be in college and your family doubted your actions. All I want is Support and trust. I don't need to prove anything for them to realize that I did a right thing. I know that I don't have nothing right now because I am still studying. I am doing good in school and doing my best to have a high grades.

I just realized that it's hard to live in these world if the people around you doubted you and doesn't believe you, yet they are the one that is your strength. They should be your inspiration and motivation to go further in life. I think they aren't disappointed but they are afraid for me to fail in life. They afraid for me to lost in track. They are just be protective for me to the point I feel Chowk. I am not a child anymore, I am in the process of adulting. I am in the journey where I can make myself independent. I know this will be hard but, I do believe that God will never leave me in this journey.

I do have dreams and all I want is to be supported and their advices, for me to be in the right track. I am also a child in mind who needs advices and care. Maybe, I think all of those negative things I heard are just for my own good, understanding it negative but the right is it was a positive. They say that, Mother knows best and Indeed my mother knows what's the best for her child.

I do hope and pray that God will provide all my needs financially, physically and mentally. College is not easy but with the help of God I can do it. I don't know what's really the plan of God but I believe in Him that He will not leave me, instead He will guide me.

Lead Image was From Unsplash

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