POV of sheepish in love
There's this person who's so important to me once said that if I just sit here and look at the butterfly and be torn in my thoughts between getting a net or not just to catch it... the butterfly already flew away,
That's it... After he said it, it already stuck in my mind and pierce to my thoughts, I'm such a sheepish in love, I never had a courage to even say what I feel to this special someone of mine, it's like if I said something or be honest on my feeling, she will become distant to me, like the universe will took her away from me, I'm afraid that it will happen so I choose just to remain just a mere human admiring and loving her in secret that I and myself is the only one who knows it,
I'm a sucker for the beauty of moon that's why I love night that's so dark that the only light that I see is the dim from a moonlight and those stars that shines, just like the moon I love watching her from a far, I love how she shine through darkest moments of my life, how she give comfort and solace when I'm alone, how come her presence light me up, her beauty is an ethereal, she's my moon, she outgrew the darkness of this reality that I'm living in...
I used to enjoy the afternoon wind before the sunset smile upon the world, the brightness of the sun started to slowly fade away and that's when the first time I saw her at the green pasture of the park busy on something and that's when I frowned when she looks so frustrated on the kite, yes a cute little yellow kite, and by that I look back and slowly go on her way, I offer a help so that she could fly that kite of yours, I'm glad that she accept it, and then I held the kite and take my steps away from her and when the wind blew I throw the kite and it flew, I looked at her and that's when the first time I felt something inside me, when the brightness of the sunset hit those face of her, those blue orbs like smiling while looking at the kite... I smile at the scene... She look at me and I feel like my blood rushes through my face... I look like a tomato right now... I thank the distance between us so she can't see me with a tint of red in my face...
And that's the start of the blossoming love of mine for her, but I kept it, everytime we will met before the dawn enveloped us, we just there playing at the kite, or sometimes sitting there and wait for the sun to settle down and the cold and darkness of the night enveloped us, it's a simple yet romatic scene for me... And I hope for her too...
I knew sometimes that I have this urge to tell her but it worry me so much to that point that I failed again to be honest with my feelings for her, qnd just one day when I had a courage to tell her, to be honest to her, to spit all the secrets I kept for too long now, that's it when she also tells me something that broke me into a million pieces, it's like my world shattered, my puzzle embroiled, and that's when I lost it, I never get the chance to tell her my feelings cause the fear envelopes me, after she told me that same day that she's dying, and that explains why she always goes to this par looking pale, and barely socialize, that's explain why she always felt dizzy and decided to just go home after we play her kite, her yellow lively sight of her kite,
Just one afternoon before the darkness envelopes the surroundeings, we watched the sunset and her kite flew through the wind, I'm the one who's holding the string of it, I look at the kite, and I look at her, she's just so innocent, how come there's a lot of people in this earth how come she's the one who's given by that kind of disease, I wish I can take all of it, I wish I can take her pain away, I look at the kite again, she's like the kite, so innocent and pure and just want to flew freely but I'm the string who keeps on chaining her, who keeps on holding onto her and not letting her go, my thoughts stop when she looks at me and smile, she walks to me and get the strings of the kite and cut it, I'm just standing there and we watched the kite freely flew where the wind blows its getting further until we never see it anymore...
"you know... sometimes we need to let things go, not because we want to, but because we need to... It's not that we are being selfish to keep things even we know that it will be better for them if we let go, just like the kite look at how it's freely flying up in the sky after we cut the strings on it... I'm just like that kite you know... I wish this ends now the suffering... I'm already tired... And if that happens... I wish you of all the people will let me go... " she speaks to me looking at the sky
I'm just there sitting next to her she leaned her head on me and we watched the sunset.... And at the same time as the sun settling down is the same time that my world started to envelope in darkness
I'm such a stupid in love, I always wait and wait, until the wait is overrated and it's a long overdue now, until the wait never comes, until she's already gone, until he took her away from me, until this world became such a cruel thing, until the nights of mine became just a bland dark, no moon, no stars just pure darkness, until my moon is already gone, until she are no longer existing in this world, and that's when the bravery became just a mere glimpse of hope that I could finally tell her that in my heart she's been part but how can I when it tears me apart,
Cause it's ironic that sunset became my favorite because of her, at the same time she's also the reason why I will hate it... She's now free... She's gone now...
Lead Image source:
https://wallpaperaccess.com/kite-flying
Image source:
https://www.pxfuel.com/en/free-photo-xgkjs
That's it my mind is a mess today haha this just a random fiction of mine hahaha please bare with my grammar hahahaha I'm so lazy to find a better word or a correct grammar to check this one haha, have a great day everyone, spend yous Sunday morning well and have a blast everyone, good morning.
ouch...sakit naman netoh..pero tama naman...you need to let go for it might be the only one the other people wait so that they can freely go