The Available Becomes The Desired

Earlier today, I was reading about a lady and her choices. The lady in question here was once twenty-seven years old, and at the time, she said she wanted a man whose older than her amongst other specifications. By the time she was twenty-nine years old, she was open to the idea of settling down with a man of the same age. A few years later, when she had crossed the 30yrs mark, her entire concept and understanding of age as regards marriage had taken a whole different turn.

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By now, she thought age was just a number, that real maturity had everything to do with the mind and nothing with the number of years one has been on earth. In all this time she was listing specs, a lot of guys would have come around, but for her list, and her desire for her 'perfect' man, she would have dismissed them all. Now she's at a critical point and all of a sudden anything available has become okay for her. This is a very common scenario in everyday living.

At every point in our lives, we have goals, aspirations and wants. With the abundance of 'motivational' speakers around, we all now know how not to compromise, how to go for what we want and not settle for less. We have become unreasonably inflexible. It's not uncommon to see someone outline a list with ten points as qualities they are looking for in a thing, and when they find one with nine, they turn it down.

This is quite nonsensical. Again, like almost everything else we do this day, this attitude or way of life is a questioning of the supremacy of God and his right to dictate ourselves in any way. It's an act of defiance by a mortal and limited being, to try and prove that his destiny is his and his alone to decide and that he could call into existence the kind of life he desires by his own sheer will and power.

These kinds of people are eventually humbled by time, as our young lady above was. When you do not learn to be flexible in what you desire, you might end up being forced to settle for something not even close. I remember when I applied for admission into the higher institution of my choice, I was accepted, but my course was not offered to me, something else was. One week, I'm applying for medicine and the next one, I'm been offered aquaculture and fisheries management.

I could have to myself that I was better than that, not to settle for that, for 'less', but I accepted it, and I can say it has turned out to be one of the best choices of my life. There's been a lot of downsides, but if the hand of time were pushed back and I had to choose again, I would choose Aquaculture and fisheries management over medicine.

I'm not saying don't pursue your dreams to the letter, I'm all down for that. The truth is, that doesn't make you a wise person. Accepting that you're not in control of everything, hence things might never go according to your plans is the beginning of that wisdom, for there are other forces in nature that can affect our dreams and goals. The wisest of men are those who have learnt to strike a balance between the utmost pursuit of our goals, as well as the flexibility to know that things might never go your way.

Author's Epilogue

Because we don't control everything, there are days what we seek isn't available. We can resolutely forsake what we need it for, or we can accept that the available will do, and do our best with it. If you aren't choice/desire-flexible enough to make that compromise, time or circumstances will force you to accept a way bigger one.

We need to learn how to accommodate what we want and what's available. Those that have found that balance, know that it's bliss.

I'm actually struggling to write this article right now. My day was indeed hectic and all I feel like doing right now is sleep, and that's exactly what I'm going to do, now that I'm done with this article.

Thanks for reading dearies...

Mhizutty the voice of truth 🎵🎶🎶