I already saved my Life

These past few days, I feel like I'm missing out. It seems like my existence is not what you actually called existence. I'm here but I can't feel that I'm totally present. Am I out of my mind for thinking this way? Or I just overthinking too much that's why I feel this way. I don't know what should I do. I already took a break but I'm still tired. Even I already sleep , I'm still have no energy to do my stuffs. No one knows how I tried to survive everyday and to prove that I can overcome it. No one asked if I'm okay because I'm falling into pieces. At some point of our life, you also realize that no one really cares for you and that reality will hit you by instance. But you know what? I also believe that sometimes, you don't need anyone to survive because yourself is enough to do it. I don't need someone's to comfort and care for me because I can give that to myself if I wished to. I don't need anyone's approval because I'm old enough to know what is the difference between right and wrong. I don't need someone's to put a smile on my lips because I can give happiness on my own. No thanks, but I already saved myself.

This mirror in front of me actually gives me time to reflect. Before, I was too dependent to someone. I always seek for their judgement and opinion about me. I feel like that I can't live without them. I thought that I need them to see my reality. I also thought that I can find the peace besides them. But ironically, I'm wrong. I'm wrong to think about it. Because the more I tried to be with them, the more myself becomes uneasy. The more I tried to prove to them that I'm worth it, the more I pitied myself. The more I tried to become happy with them, the more I lose myself. I saved them but no one is ready to save me. I left hanging there. I already know that no one will tried to help me because at the end , I know that I already saved my life.

Did you also feel sometimes that you are physically inside your house but you still looking for your home? Maybe your in the house but you can't feel the warm that homes should looks like. Or let's put this way. You are there in front of your friends but no one noticed your present. It's feel like your an invisible that they didn't see or maybe you are visible but no one wants to talked to you. You're definitely tired of it right? So , I will say to you that you should stop doing that stuffs. Stand up and save your own life.

Don't depend yourself on them. They are just the minority of your life not the majority. I also believe that we also need friends but not to the point that we depend our whole life to them. Maybe , you can possibly say that I'm crazy saying this words but I love to becomes crazy than being with a fake people. I choose to smile alone over smile in front of the unnecessary human being in my life. You and me are the same. We don't need someone's to fulfill the emptiness in ourselves because we can give that to ourselves if we really want. You want to find true love? Seek it in your heart because you and yourself can give that love you deserve. You want peace? Close your eyes and forget all the things that makes you uncomfortable and miserable. You want someone to be proud of you? Why you don't try to be proud to yourself first? It's sounds funny that we always depend and seek for other's attention and yet you , yourselves can't give that attention you deserve. You don't need one because you only need you. This time save your life because I already saved my life.

I already saved my life in times that no one did it for me. I already saved my life for being a dependent before and now I'm already to upgrade myself to be an independent one. I already saved my life for those unwanted and negative thoughts that I have in my mind. I already saved my life because I can able to put myself away from the toxic people and society that I have. I already saved my life in the loneliness and now I can put a sweet smile on my own. I already saved my life on those storms and struggles that I've faced before. I already saved my life and now I'm ready to step up. You? Can you save your life without them? Can you save your life for once? Can you ? Or are you still afraid to face the reality? I know that it's not an easy thing but can you step aside all the things and think yourself first? I hope you can also able to make a reflection to save yourself. Because you are the only one who can do that to yourself.

I'll end this article by dropping this song entitled "Hero". I just saw it on YouTube and suddenly it becomes my favorite now. I can relate to every lyrics of it so I hope that you can also relate to this one. Keep safe and always check yourself.