Should I stay?

Here I am in bed with my little ball of sunshine beside me. She's now sleeping but I shouldn't be too confident that I will have my rest too because anytime soon she'll be awake by the noise outside. It's funny that she can even hear the slightest noise. One time, I grabbed our alcohol and open the lid. I am very much sure that I won't wake her up because I took small steps only and didn't make any sound. Little did I know that the sound of the alcohol's lid as I am opening it would wake her up. Babies are so powerful. Aren't they? And then I will be back again to stage number one which is letting her back to sleep. Cute Clea.

That's Clea when she's still not yet sleeping. She's 3 month old now and I can say that she's growing so fast. In fact, she's turning 4 month old this month. I am so excited for her to turn 6 months so we can feed her with solid food. I can imagine her with dirty hands and mouth from the food we will prepare for her. Lol. But I know I should not be in a hurry because that time will come so swiftly.

How are you all read-fam? It's been three days since I haven't been here and y'all know why. Oh dear! It's fine if the electricity won't get fixed quickly but please, bring back the good internet connection. I admit my earnings here has helped me a lot especially in buying Clea's needs for I am did not get back to work. Missing a day being here also means no earnings for me. And, just posting an article without interaction is a shame for me for I need to work what I earned here. Sometimes, when Clea is sleeping, I let my grandma look after her so we can travel to the next town to have an internet connection. Although I have my grandma to take care of Clea, I still worry a lot because she won't latch in a feeding bottle and I don't want her to get hungry while I am away.

This is also where my problem starts. The manager from my previous work chatted me if I still want to teach again because the center is already open. God knows how I love to go back to work but I am thinking of my little Clea. How can I go back to work if she's still not able to latch on a feeding bottle? How can I function well at work if she's getting hungry? We already tried using different nipple but still, she doesn't know how. Actually, she already can after some days of practicing but when we were not able to do the practice in just a day, she already forgot the process the next day and so we started again back to zero. I know she can learn it again but the question is when? The formula milk we gave her is okay for her too because she likes the taste of it and her po*p is not that so watery. I tried watching videos on YouTube what to do and one thing I can do is to buy another feeding bottle that is recommended by pediatricians and that is either Philips Avent or Dr. Brown's feeding bottle which are kinda pricy. But I don't care as long as my baby is comfortable latching on it. That's why I am so eager to get back to work or even be here in read.cash. Clea's need also increases as she grows the reason why I also find it very important for me to earn.

But how can I earn? My baby needs me all the time. I miss her in a just a short time I am away. Should I sacrifice my dream over Clea? Well I shouldn't ask this question because I know myself that I will forever choose my daughter. If Clea won't allow me to go, then I won't. However, it's not too late because we have time to practice Clea. I just hope she will get it this time.

Sorry for my mom-rants. Anyway, I am so thankful today because even if I am three days away, there's still a blessing awaits me.

This means that we have a reason to be thankful everyday. Indeed, each day is a blessing.

Thank you fam for supporting me. I may not be able to respond immediately but I promise I'll make it up when I have the time. Thanks to my sponsors and to those people who upvote my posts. You guys are big help.

My heart is also full today! Thank you a lot @Eylz2021, @meitanteikudo, @Janz, @JustMyRambles01 and @Hart05 for the sponsorship renewal. Your support keeps me going.

Ciao! ❤️