November 21, 2021

Sundays, what comes to our minds when we hear the word Sunday? Is it a family day for you? A day to go to the church? Or both? Whatever it is, it is a day to give yourself a good rest. After a whole week of fighting and chasing due dates, give yourself a rest every Sunday in order to recharge for the whole new week coming in your face.

It is good to give yourself time to breathe after you are done with all the things that giving you stress. Especially now, the world is getting smaller because we are in the middle of a pandemic, many of us have no choice but to do things in order to survive even want to do something else.

Morning

I woke up early this morning when I open my eyes my mother shout at me to take a bath because we are going to church. Since I was a little boy, I and my parent always go to church every Sunday. At first, we go to A roman catholic church, but as time progressed we shift from catholic to born-again Christian. This shift is sudden, I don`t know the reason, I was a little child back then I only go to church so I can see my friends and we will have a good time playing in the nearest playground at that time.

But when I was getting older, everything change. My parents are always fighting and I am caught in the middle of it. I was just a child full of hope and all I can see is rainbow in a bad times with my family. Back then I was always praying and hoping that everything have a chance to change. But nothing changes.

I so I give up going to church every Sunday and I will just pray on my own every time. There was a time that I asked my grandfather why he is not going to church every Sunday. He answered that the church is just a place and the true place of worship could be anywhere, as long as you are praying sincerely, trying to communicate above with respect and love, that is all you need. I am not a little boy at that time so I understand what he was saying.

I am amazed at what he said and it is always in my mind every time. As long as I prayed sincerely with love and respect, that is all I need.

Afternoon

In the afternoon I practice playing guitar before going to my cousin`s house not so far away from here. His new keyboard will arrive this day so we are excited to see it. Before I go there, the package already arrived so we open it once I get there. It is so beautiful, sounds good, and feels good. We assembled it and I go home before 3 so I can help my group mates to do the homework in our surgery subject.

After doing all the things that I need to do, I rested for the whole remaining time of the day. I just lie in my bed and think about the past and the history of why did I stop going to church. When I was a child I remember, there was a time that we go to church and after the mass, we go home and my father started to shout at me about simple things I did wrong. And there is also a time that the pastor said that, If we did not go to church every Sunday, the devil won inside of us because we choose not to listen to the word of the lord.

For me, people change and stop going to church because of all the thing that is happening every day. Some people pray for a simple thing like peace but it will not happen, and of course, we don`t know why. Many people stop going to churches because not will change after the mass, everything will stay hard and chaotic once we got home. It will be always the same, whether we go to church or not.

I am not saying that you should stop going to churches, what I am saying is my reason why I stopped. But at night I am always praying in secret and in silence, still hoping that something will change eventually, praying that the peace I wanted will come sooner before I lose all of my power to live.

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