Forgiving yourself is not difficult

Forgiving yourself may be seen as a very difficult thing. However, it turns out that forgiving yourself is not as difficult as imagined. It only requires self-awareness and also some processes that must be passed, then you can forgive yourself for the mistakes you have done or you have made. Before starting to forgive yourself, you must understand a little about forgiveness. What is forgiveness? Forgiveness is a process that involves a person's internal choice to let go of a cold emotional state, such as anger, resentment, and hatred and seek reconciliation or peace with the offender.

Another character named Denton and Martin (1998) said that forgiveness is a process that occurs within a person who has been hurt to be able to free himself from anger, hatred, and fear. In addition, the process of forgiveness also means throwing away the feeling of revenge and eliminating the desire to take revenge. Forgiveness is an active choice, based on a person's desire to let go of the negative emotions that arise within him. Forgiving yourself has a broader scope than just reducing negative emotions within you.

What is the Process of Forgiving Yourself?

Forgiving yourself is a process. That is, there are stages that you must go through so that you can truly let go of your negative emotions and learn to forgive yourself for the actions you have done. The first step and process in forgiving yourself are to be aware of the negative emotions that are present. This is the first process that you must go through to forgive yourself, by being aware of the negative emotions that are in you. Anger, resentment, resentment, and desire for revenge, as well as thoughts about problems that make you feel guilty, must be presented fully and completely in this process.

Second, you must decide to forgive. At this stage, you should be able to realize that holding grudges, anger, and resentment, especially against yourself, will only make you miserable. When you realize that you will only suffer more if you hold on to negative emotions, then you can decide that you will forgive yourself for what you have done.

Third, is the work phase. At this stage or phase, you realize that the actions that have been carried out by the perpetrator (or yourself) are normal and common things. Humans are people who are never free from mistakes, including yourself. In this process, you will realize that the actions you have done before are a form of mistake or your shortcomings as a human being. This process may take a long time because not everyone can accept what they have done. There is no need to rush because the main purpose of this process is so that you can forgive yourself.

Fourth is the final and deepening process. In this process, you have succeeded in strengthening your desire to forgive yourself. To further mature the process of forgiveness or forgiveness on yourself, then in this process, you can try to release your positive emotions and all your generosity to yourself (to others if you want to forgive other people's mistakes).

That's a little process and how to forgive yourself that you can do. Keep in mind, this process can take some time and will take longer if you have a strong sense of guilt. Don't worry and don't be afraid, because this process will help you become a better individual. The writing that I wrote is a summary of me when I attended the seminar. The seminar was also presented by my lecture.

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